creativity

In the pause: All children deserve to rise

I’m so tired of the acceptance that zip code is destiny. My entire life is a rejection of that belief, and I will keep rejecting it until I’m out of breath and out of strength. Somewhere along the way, our society decided that a child born into difficulty on the south side of Chicago won’t have the same chance to rise to their potential as a child born with every privilege on the south side of Central Park. Is the life of that child in Chicago any less valuable that the life of that child in New York? I don’t think so. I know you don’t think so either. So let’s change that, together. Let’s stack the odds in favor of all kids everywhere.

There are too many kids who are cold, and tired, and hungry, and frustrated. There are too many kids who don’t see a way up and out of their circumstances because no one they know ever got up or out. Imagine what our world would be like if every child alive right now got everything they needed to grow up healthy, educated, kind, and confident. That’s the image I hold in my mind as I think about ways to offer virtual and on-demand guidance counseling to kids across the country, and eventually across the globe. It’s a big vision, a big dream, and our kids deserve nothing less. They have to know that somewhere out in the world, there is an adult who believes in them, who is holding a light for them so that they can find their way forward even in the darkest of times. To that child, that one light can make all the difference. And that’s worth fighting for.

creativity

In the pause: It’s okay to collapse

“For a star to be born, there is one thing that must happen: a gaseous nebula must collapse. So collapse. Crumble. This is not your destruction. This is your birth.” ~Zoe Skylar

We work so hard to keep things, even ourselves, from falling apart. Somehow we have managed to associate becoming undone with being completely done, forever. Don’t be ashamed of your undoing or your failure, your missteps or your losses. This is a cycle of life – catching and releasing, holding on and letting go, rising up and falling down. There’s so much to be learned and experienced in the collapse. There you can rest, restore, and rebuild. Wiser, braver, stronger, more focused, and with the knowledge that no matter what life throws at you, you will find a way to shine.

creativity

In the pause: My new business idea and passion project to help kids make their way in the world

F*ck it. I’m going for it. I’ve been kicking around the idea for a new business I’d like to start, and after several months of gnashing my teeth and wringing my hands, I decided I’m just going to do it. As I’ve mentioned several times, I was lucky to have an amazing guidance counselor, Jim Wherry, when I was in high school. I’ve learned over the last few months that I was luckier than I thought. In some schools, the ratio of guidance counselors to students is 1:500. And though we spend thousands of dollars every year per student on educating them, we spend the equivalent of a can of Coke per student on guidance counselors. A can of Coke. Bill Symonds, Director of the Global Pathways Institute, calls this “the black hole in the American education system.” I can’t get that idea out of my mind so I decided to embrace it and do something about it.

My therapist, Brian, once said to me that the best way for me to make my past mean something is to pay it forward. I think about how hard I worked and how much I struggled as a student and as a young adult. I think about the free lunch program that I was simultaneously grateful for and embarrassed by. I worked, and worked, and worked so that my life as an adult could be more secure than my life as a child. I think about the fact that despite my many hardships, there are far too many kids today who are in the same boat or even worse off. The boy I met on the streets of D.C. a few nights ago is a prime example of the people who need me to make this business a reality. Every student deserves to have a Jim Wherry. And I’m going to find a way to make that possible while also creating a company that creates jobs and has the kindest, bravest, most passionate, and most respectful culture imaginable because our work is something we should love to do. Our kids all across this country need us to stand up for them and support them as they make their way in a world that is becoming an increasingly difficult place. This is my act of resistance.

That’s my side hustle for now that I hope becomes a full-time venture over time. I’ll still need to work full-time in another job I enjoy (and let’s face it, the world is now full of opportunities for me to do good work) so that I don’t have to worry about money while I build this new idea. And that’s A-OK with me because I want to do what’s right for our kids without making choices based on my own personal finances.

So here we go back into the world of entrepreneurship, and this time a little older, hopefully a little wiser, and just as determined to use my business skills to build a passion project that builds a better world.

If you’d like to offer advice, help, ideas, or encouragement, I’ll take them.

creativity

In the pause: Healing is made of magic and time

“Don’t confuse a season for a lifetime. Even your trials have an expiration date.” ~Brittney Moses

Maybe you’re going through something right now that feels sad or painful or disappointing. When we go through tough times, it’s almost impossible to imagine an end to them. But it’ll get better. And you’ll get better. It won’t be overnight. It’ll happen little by little, day by day. You’ll stand a little taller. Smile a little wider. Shine a little brighter. Healing of any kind is one part magic and two parts time. Believe in the power of both.

 

creativity

In the pause: How to destroy all your demons

“Do not just slay your demons; dissect them and find out what they’ve been feeding on.” ~ The Man Frozen in Time

Even the most well-adjusted, confident, and kind people have occasional thoughts and feelings in which they feel less-than. I don’t need to look any further than my mirror to find someone who fits that bill. And while I can play the game of fake it ’til I make it with the best of them, the most effective treatment I’ve found is to really get at the root of my own negative self-talk. Hack away at that root, and there is so much more freedom and joy that gets unlocked.

For example, whenever I’m searching for a new job opportunity, I read the role description and if I don’t fit one bullet my first reaction is to move on. I’ve learned that this is a direct result of my inner perfectionist (which causes plenty of other challenges for me, but let’s just stick to this one for now.) If I can’t do something 99.9% perfectly, I’m obsessing about that 0.1%.

As an adult, I’ve learned to constantly put myself in the role of being a beginner to counter this. Along the way, I have grown my skill sets, met incredible people, traveled to stunning places, and dare I say it, become a recovering perfectionist. I don’t know that I’m ever going to completely get rid of that perfection instinct, but I do know that I control it now and it doesn’t control me. I’ve learned to congratulate myself for trying something new, even when it’s a complete disaster. I’ve learned to be my own best cheerleader and my own best company. I’ve learned to value my strengths and to no longer fear failure.

And as for those job applications, I send them off. I don’t take myself out of the running for anything that sounds interesting to me. My friend, Brooke, once told me years ago that we are all born knowing nothing. We all start at zero. We learn everything we need to learn just by going through life . And that process never stops, so why stop ourselves? Now that’s what I call slaying a demon and then eating its lunch.

creativity

In the pause: Pursuing an interest in historic preservation

In my early 20s while I was working in theater management, I had the great privilege to travel all over the U.S. and Canada with different tours. I was always amazed by the beauty, history, and culture of the restored spaces where we played, and those experiences began my interest in historic preservation. Now whenever I travel to a new city (or even around cities I know well), you can find me looking up and building facades and examining the internal architecture that makes buildings so unique. It’s one of the things I love so much about New York City; the variation in architecture there is endless!

I decided to get a little bit more serious about this interest and enrolled in an online class called The Architectural Imagination. It’s being offered on the edX platform by four professors of architecture at Harvard and it’s free. If architecture and historic preservation is something you’re interested in, too, sign up and we can go through it together!

More info on the class here: https://www.edx.org/course/architectural-imagination-harvardx-gsd1x#!

creativity

In the pause: Define what you want

A number of years ago, my friend, Susan, gave me some great advice that I still think about on a regular basis. “Christa, don’t compare opportunities to each other. Compare them to what you want.” It’s that second piece, knowing what you want in any realm in life, that is so critical and what so many of us (myself included!) make an afterthought. We put on the blinders far too soon. We believe that our options are limited right from the start and we don’t give ourselves the opportunity to really define success and happiness on our own terms. Thank you, Susan, for all the wise advice you share with so many people in so many channels. I know I am a better person and have a better life because of your advice. Now, back to the difficult and wonderful work of defining what I want in life…
creativity

In the pause: Be a possibilist

“I don’t consider myself an optimist or a pessimist, but rather a possibilist.” ~Hans Rosling, edutainer, data scientist, and inspiration

I like Hans’s outlook. It helps us make the most of good times, and keep tough times in perspective. It keeps us looking forward instead of looking back. It keeps us from getting stuck in a job, or a city, or a relationship that doesn’t work for us. It keeps hope alive, and makes us grateful for what we have while preventing us from getting bitter about what we don’t have. And that is a very good thing to be.

We lost Han Rosling a few weeks ago. His belief that our best days are ahead of us played out every day in his work and in his life. That’s a goal worth striving for.

 

creativity

In the pause: Don’t let money run the show. At least not at the beginning.

On Friday, I was talking to a friend about a new business she’s thinking of starting. She reached out to another friend of hers to ask for advice. Though she has a lot of passion for the idea, she wasn’t sure how to monetize it. Her friend, a very successful entrepreneur in the financial services space, said, “Don’t worry about monetization right now. Just build what you want to build.”

That might sound like odd advice, especially from someone who works in finance. Aren’t we taught that to build a business we must think about bootstrapping or raising capital and an exit strategy? Doesn’t it all start with how to get money in and then how to get your money back out? This is where a lot of ventures fall down – they worry so much about the money at the start that they lose sight of why they’re building a business in the first place. It starts with passion and heart.

At the beginning of a business idea, you’re experimenting and testing. You’re trying to figure out what you can do and who you can help. To do that, you build the smallest possible piece that you can with as little money as possible for a very small number of people. Go ahead and dream big, but build small. You don’t need to save the whole planet in the next hour. All you need to do is make one thing better for one person. That’s the seed. Start there and see where the path leads. Stay curious. Stay hungry. Stay alert. Pay attention. Listen. Try, fail, and try again. Right now, that’s the only work you have to do.

creativity

In the pause: Stop watering dead plants

“Sweetheart, listen to me. You’ve got to stop watering dead plants.” ~Anonymous

So many of us (myself very much included) do this far too often. People, we’re better than this. Truly. If a metaphorical plant is dead, let it decompose and move on. There are far better things that need your time, resources, and attention. Okay? Okay.