Month: April 2013

health, love

Beautiful: Love Doesn’t Blind Us. It Helps Us See More Clearly.

Christa Avampato

“While infused with love you see fewer distinctions between you and others. Indeed, your ability to see others — really see them, wholeheartedly — springs open.” ~ Barbara Fredrickson

I’ve heard it said that love is blind, but I’ve never found that to be true. Love in all its beautiful forms – for another person or animal, for self, for community, for life, for a project that is near and dear to our hearts – has the ability to make everything appear clearer, brighter, and more joyful. And there is plenty of hard science to back this up.

Last year, the New York Times ran a series of pieces that analyzed the brain on love and the findings are remarkable. It reduces stress. It makes it easier to learn new things and to heal from illness. The power of love is potent and worthwhile because the benefits far outweigh the costs. We would all do well to invest time and effort into bringing more love into our lives.

celebration, change, time

Beautiful: We Can’t Wait to Be Ready

Christa Avampato

Many of my friends are now going through or considering big life changes. New jobs, new homes (temporary and permanent), new relationships, new babies. So few of them are actually ready for any of these changes. Hardly any of them could have predicted even a few months ago that the situation today would be what it is. Opportunity abounds and it doesn’t consult us. It just appears and we are left to decide whether to take advantage of it or pass it to someone else.

All of the big changes of my life came about when I wasn’t ready. I hadn’t been planning on their arrival or possibility. They just appeared. My recent move is one example. I didn’t realize that chapter was over until it was.

The Universe works in mysterious ways, and mostly out of our view. It is that (wo)man behind the curtain to whom we pay no attention until it’s ready for us. All change is hard, even joyful change. It brings about memories that are stored deep within us, in our minds and in our bodies. We toss and turn over our decisions. We find it difficult to let go of our ideas of how our life should unfold.

And yet, the actual act of letting go is not difficult at all. We simply do. Like clinging to the side of a pool, we often stay where we are out of fear. But to physically let go, all we have to do is uncurl our fingers, release our grip, and we find that we can float. We can only take one day at a time, one moment at a time, and this allows us to move with grace.

We can’t wait to be ready for change. All we can do is give ourselves over to it when it arrives, find the beauty, the joy, the light in it. Celebrate it and welcome it. Get swept off your feet by it, and have faith that eventually you will be able to root when the time is right.

happiness

Beautiful: Fun, Little Known, and Hilarious Facts From the Natural World That Are Guaranteed to Make You Smile

Christa Avampato
Otters holding hands while sleeping

How about a little levity? Check out these 30 happiest facts of all time, courtesy of my dear friend, Sara, who always makes me happy whenever I see her, hear from her, and read her Facebook updates. Thanks, Sara!

Number 1 should hook you to read the other 29: otters hold hands while sleeping so they don’t float away. You’re smiling, right? Read on…

apartment, home

Beautiful: Letting Go, Goodbye, and Hello

Christa Avampato

“I suppose in the end, the whole of life becomes an act of letting go. But what always hurts the most is not taking a moment to say goodbye.” ~ Life of Pi

The move is complete. I left my apartment of 3 and half years to move down the road to a new home. After my movers left, I went back over to my old place with Phin to return my keys. I went upstairs to have one last look around. I knew I hadn’t left anything material behind, but I wanted to just see it one more time in its original state.

When I moved in there, I had lost almost all of my belongings 6 days earlier due to a building fire. I was lucky to be alive and I knew it. I made my way into this sunny new home wearing simple closes and carrying a plastic bag and a friend’s borrowed air mattress. It seemed fitting that I take one last look around this place, empty, exactly the way I remember it being when I first arrived.

I twirled around in the sunlit space, pressed my cheek to the warm window, and drew a long, deep, grateful breath. Phin took a spin around the place, bobbed his head, and then headed for the door as if to say, “Okay, I’m ready.” I said a heartfelt, quiet thank you, and then left. The cycle was complete and whole, and so am I thanks to this place. It deserved a proper goodbye after all we’d been through together. We both earned it and needed it. Now it’s ready for a new story, and so am I. And so, I let go.

hope

Beautiful: A Prayer and Promise for Boston

Christa Avampato

Dear Boston,
My heart broke for you yesterday. Your marathon runners trained for months to complete an act that is largely governed by sheer will and determination. Running the Chicago Marathon in 2001, shortly after September 11th, was one of the proudest and happiest days of my life. It was an affirmation of life, a clear communication to the world that we will not shrink away from adversity because of fear. I am sick that your runners have been robbed of this same feeling. The whole of this country is with you now to make this same affirmation. You are alone in your grief and sorrow. We stand with you, shoulder to shoulder.

I understand that these types of behaviors can’t be rationalized, but here’s something that can be: when people seek to harm the innocent, to take a stand for their “principles” by inflicting pain upon others, you better believe that the goodness that lies within the rest of us will rise up strong, fearless, and unrelenting. We will be damned if we will ever take this kind of horrendous behavior lying down. We will not be intimidated and we will not accept this kind of tragedy as par for the course in our ever-more complex and complicated world.

Justice will be served. In the end, it always is. Karma is a perfect accounting system and it always keeps its promises. Here’s our promise to you: we will not rest until we bind up these wounds in the hearts, minds, and bodies of your people. We will see you through this.

Love,
Everyone

apartment, home

Beautiful: Leaving Home to Find Home

Christa Avampato

Home is such a complex word. At its simplest, it is some sort of structure that protects those who live within it. But there is so much more to it. Home is a feeling, a place where we are most comfortable, where we can truly be who we are without putting on airs and without shrinking away from our essence. It is a place where we can dream.

Today I am trading one home for another, letting go of a structure that has helped to protect me while I have gone about building a new life over the last 3 and a half years. It has been good to me. It has kept me safe. It has been a teacher to me. It has renewed my faith that from tough circumstances, beautiful things can and do arise if we keep at this game of life. As long as we don’t give up, a home will incubate the very best that is within us until we are ready to take that goodness someplace new.

Now I am ready to do just that.

beauty, nature, yoga

Beautiful: How Compass Yoga Is Like a River

Christa Avampato

“We must begin thinking like a river if we are to leave a legacy of beauty and life for future generations.” ~ David Brower

After a long day of cleaning my apartment and packing up the last of my boxes, Phin and I took advantage of the late afternoon sunshine to stroll along the banks of the Hudson River. I was reminded of this quote by David Brower as I took in the scene. Rivers welcome everyone to relax and enjoy the view. They offer time for reflection. They give us the opportunity to take a deep breath, and then let it go.

That’s what we’re attempting to do with Compass Yoga. We are an organization that builds space for everyone to just be, a place where people can sit with their joy and their sorrow and recognize the wonder and beauty in all of it. We will hold a space for them to be safe, to let their minds power down for a while so that they can step out into the world fully revived. Like a river that flows and flows, we will be here for our students no matter what life has in store for them.

time

Beautiful: The Patterns of Our Lives

Christa Avampato

“Pay attention to the intricate patterns of your existence that you take for granted.” ~ Doug Dillon

Good and not-so-good, patterns hold knowledge. We experience this during those wonderful times when we’re “on a roll”, when we’re tapped in and things seem to fall right into their own perfect places. We also become all too-aware of patterns when we find ourselves on a rough jag when nothing seems to go our way. In both types of circumstances, I’ve found that if I focus on finding the pattern then I feel much more empowered. It takes the emotion out of it. My confidence and outlook are buoyed. Then, I can put my energy toward healthy patterns and release those that don’t serve.

For a long time, I was stuck in a pattern of jobs that would begin well and then quickly unravel. As it turned out, I wasn’t meant to work for anyone else. I was meant to work for me. Once I made that switch, and clearly articulated that to myself and to others, a lot of opportunities revealed themselves. To bring those opportunities to light, I needed to be clear about what I wanted and why. And I’ve had to become very adept at walking away from what seem like good opportunities because they are not the right fit for me. (I recently learned this lesson again, and will recount that story in a later post.)

In my personal life, I used to date guys who “needed” me in the very broad sense of the world. And while that felt great at the start, all of those relationships eventually ended because I was exhausted by that dance. Now I realize what I need is someone who needs me but is also just fine on his own, too. “Better together” is the more compatible match for me. I have a busy life full of things I love and I need someone else who feels the same way about his own life and work.

These epiphanies were there all along. I just needed to take the time to look for the patterns of behavior and motivation that made them so. And these discoveries were well worth the time and effort it took to realize them; they’ve lead to more joy and less stress. What more could I ask for?

change, home, moving, nature, season, Spring

Beautiful: Spring Helps Us Move On

Christa Avampato

“Despite the forecast, live like it’s Spring.” ~ Lilly Pulitzer

My apartment is now at the weird point when it feels like a home, but it no longer feels like my home. I packed all my belongings in boxes. I took my art down off the walls. I’m wiping the slate clean and beginning again. It’s so appropriate to make a move in the Spring, when everything in the natural world is blossoming and blooming, stretching its wings and slowly coming back to life after a long winter’s nap.

My friend, Cyndie, also pointed out that this week is a New Moon. In astronomy, the New Moon is the phase of the Moon when it lies closest to the Sun in the sky as seen from the Earth. I feel the light pouring into my own life this week, too. I hope this light, and the feeling of renewal, will continue to follow me from season to season.

change, home, moving

Beautiful: Packing and Moving

Christa Avampato
My reusable moving bins from Jugglebox

“Leave the door open to the unknown, the door into the dark. That’s where the most important things come from, where you yourself came from, and where you will go.” ~ Rebecca Solnit

This is my delivery from Jugglebox, a green moving company that delivers and picks up reusable plastic crates, eliminating the need for those cardboard boxes that we so often hunt for when we’re making a move. And so it begins….the process of sorting, packing, and cleaning as I trade one home in for another. A new beginning.

In my current home, I healed after my apartment building fire. I picked myself up, dusted myself off, and started all over again. I rebuilt my life, literally, one tiny piece at a time. I let go of past disappointments. I became stronger, bolder, and more courageous. I started Compass Yoga here. I started my consulting practice here. This was Phin’s first forever home.

It was a wonderful home for what I needed then. And now I need something new and different and fresh. The start of a new chapter needs a blank page. To create the next masterpiece, we need an empty canvas.

So it’s with so much gratitude and a tiny bit of sadness that I release the familiar in favor of what comes next. Whatever it is, I’m ready for it.