Tag: Life lessons

creativity

Wonder: Ladies, we’re being judged. And that’s a good thing. Here’s why.

Christa Avampato

Tell me if this sounds familiar. You’re single: “When are you going to find someone?” In a relationship: “When are you getting married?” Married: “When are you having kids?” Divorced: “Just couldn’t make it work, huh?” Have a child: “When are you having a second?” Have multiple kids: “Well, forget about ever doing anything fun for the next 10 years.” I know this happens to women all the time. Maybe it happens to men, too. I can only speak from personal experience that this constantly happens to me.

Here’s what I know to be true: people are judging you every second of every day and it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. If you choose to live your life differently than others, if you make different choices, they assume that your life is somehow a judgement on theirs.

But here is the good news: you are being judged, many times unfairly, so you might as well live exactly the life that you want. Somewhere along the way in the development of our social norms, commenting on someone’s politics or religion became off-limits and commenting on someone’s love life remained hopelessly free game.

My advice to you (and to myself): if they are asking a respectful, tastefully worded question based in true curiosity, fabulous. Let’s have a conversation. You know someone I should meet, great. Please connect us.

However, if they are rudely passing judgement and making you feel small because of your circumstances and choices, then please, in no uncertain terms, walk away. They are not your work to do. I’m serious. You are a gorgeous, talented, stunning human being, and anyone who tries to belittle you because of your life choices doesn’t deserve your time.

Smile, get up, and walk away. You have better things to do and better people to do them with. Insults and rude behavior are never acceptable. In 2017, I hope we can all experience a greater sense of decorum in all of our interactions. In the meantime, go live your best life and leave those judgements right where they belong—with the people who make them.

creativity

Wonder: You are the universe

Christa Avampato
You are the universe in ecstatic motion.
You are the universe in ecstatic motion.

“Stop acting so small. You are the universe in ecstatic motion.” ~Rumi

How many times have you wondered if you’re good enough for a job, a person, or just something wonderful? Understand this: you are enough. You are so much more than enough. Forget about being too young or too old for something. Forget about your regrets and self-doubt and fears. That thinking doesn’t serve you. You’re better than that. You’ve always been better than that. Now go get the life you want, the whole life you want, because that’s exactly what you deserve.

creativity

This just in: The gift of disappointment

Christa Avampato
Transform disappointment
Transform disappointment

I’ve been talking to a lot of friends this week. It seems that 2015 was a tough one for many people. Disappointment is a painful feeling because it leaves us both hollow and confused. I’d take just about any emotion over disappointment. It’s a tough one to get through and get over, though it’s also a gift in the truest sense of the word because it means a truth, however painful, has been revealed to us. And with truth we can create something new, forge a different path, and become a better version of who we are.

So if 2015 was a tough year for you, if you had your fair share of disappointment, think of it as fuel that can help you build a brighter 2016. Someday, we’ll look back and say this is the year that had to happen.

creativity

This just in: Follow your inspiration and find the natural hum for your life

Christa Avampato
Find your inspiration

I’m not great at vacation; I never feel rejuvenated by it. I wish I did. I envy people who do. I just can’t. If anything, I feel overly anxious about the very idea of vacation. About 12 hours into it, I start to get antsy. I need a project and I’ve stopped trying to fight that need. I am who I am, and my idea of fun is creating things. It’s what I do and who I am.

In 2016, I’m not going to fight that anymore. I’m an intense, passionate, and some might say (slightly) manic, person. Moments of calm and peace are necessary (I sit in meditation for 18 minutes a day no matter what my schedule is), though the natural hum of my life exists at a higher frequency and that’s just fine by me. I’m most comfortable when I’m using my mind, body, and heart to build something.

In the new year, I hope we all find that—the way and speed of life that feels most authentic for us. It’s different for everyone, and there isn’t a way that’s better. Just a way that’s better for each of us as individuals. Let’s honor that.

creativity

This just in: Gil Batle renders his past in exquisitely carved ostrich eggs

Christa Avampato

“Art saves lives. I used to think that was corny, but it’s true. It saved mine.” ~Gil Batle, former prisoner and artist

If you ever wanted to see an elegant story, beautifully told and deeply felt, about how art saves people then this post is for you. Jane Pauley interviewed Gil Batle on CBS Sunday Morning and it’s one of the most incredible interviews I’ve ever seen. Gil Batle has struggled with drug addiction for most of his adult life, and he committed a series of crimes to support that habit. At age 53, he’s clean, free, and creating art that channels his painful past. He carves intricate scenes into ostrich eggs using a high speed dental drill that etches the scenes no deeper than 1/16 of an inch into the shell. If you’re in New York, his work is on display at the Ricco Maresca Gallery. If you’re not in New York, take a look at his work through the video below. You can also see his art at http://www.gilbatle.com/ and on Instagram at @gilbatle.

creativity

This just in: What Andy Rooney learned and shared with us

Christa Avampato
Andy Rooney
Andy Rooney

I was and still am a big fan of Andy Rooney’s essays. The quintessential curmudgeon, he was honest, funny, and poignant all in the same breath. Here is an essay of his that’s always been one of my favorites.

I’ve Learned

  • I’ve learned … That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.
  • I’ve learned … That when you’re in love, it shows.
  • I’ve learned … That just one person saying to me, “You’ve made my day!” makes my day.
  • I’ve learned … That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.
  • I’ve learned … That being kind is more important than being right.
  • I’ve learned … That you should never say no to a gift from a child.
  • I’ve learned … That I can always pray for someone when I don’t have the strength to help him in some other way.
  • I’ve learned … That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.
  • I’ve learned … That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.
  • I’ve learned … That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.
  • I’ve learned … That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
  • I’ve learned … That we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.
  • I’ve learned … That money doesn’t buy class.
  • I’ve learned … That it’s those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.
  • I’ve learned … That under everyone’s hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.
  • I’ve learned … That the Lord didn’t do it all in one day. What makes me think I can?
  • I’ve learned … That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.
  • I’ve learned … That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.
  • I’ve learned … That love, not time, heals all wounds.
  • I’ve learned … That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.
  • I’ve learned … That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.
  • I’ve learned … That there’s nothing sweeter than sleeping with your babies and feeling their breath on your cheeks.
  • I’ve learned … That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.
  • I’ve learned … That life is tough, but I’m tougher.
  • I’ve learned … That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.
  • I’ve learned … That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.
  • I’ve learned … That I wish I could have told my dad that I love him one more time before he passed away.
  • I’ve learned … That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.
  • I’ve learned … That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.
  • I’ve learned … That I can’t choose how I feel, but I can choose what I do about it.
  • I’ve learned … That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you’re hooked for life.
  • I’ve learned … That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing it.
  • I’ve learned … That it is best to give advice in only two circumstances: when it is requested and when it is a life-threatening situation.
  • I’ve learned … That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.