Tag: learning

creativity

In the pause: Embrace endings

Christa Avampato

“I don’t pay attention to the world ending. It’s ended for me many times and began again in the morning.” ~Anonymous

I’ve learned to embrace endings, not because they are fun or comforting but because they make space for something new. I’ve learned that nothing lasts forever, that life in all its forms is full of cycles and changes. Changes and challenges, no matter how much they are welcomed, are difficult because for some amount of time there is a void. I used to be very quick to fill up that void as fast as possible. Now at the ripe old age of 41, I purposely slow it down. I spend a good amount of time reflecting, processing, and deciding how best to move forward after any major change. I’ve learned how to ask for and receive help with grace and gratitude. And then I pay forward that help, as many times as I possibly can.

One of the great benefits of growing older is that it’s easier to pinpoint what really matters and why. When something ends now, I’m grateful for the lessons it teaches me and the strength it gives me. In time, new possibilities and opportunities always present themselves and often in the most unlikely ways. The world begins again, and we’re off on new adventures that pave the path ahead. I can’t wait to see what’s next!

creativity

In the pause: The power of thinking small

Christa Avampato

One of the main tenants of business and new product development is to develop the least expensive, least time intensive version of your product to test with exactly the people you hope to become your customers. You want to put in just enough money and effort so that the idea of what you’re trying to do is clear and the experience is positive. And you want to keep from putting in too much money and effort on an idea that just doesn’t work. It’s all about using resources wisely and conserving as much as you can while also still giving the idea a fighting chance to show its value. It’s a tricky balancing act, but it has to be done.

With A Can of Coke, my online platform to provide college- and career-readiness counseling for high school students, I can use an easy, light-weight combination of Google Calendar and Google Hangout with a small handful of students to help them in the evening and weekend hours for a couple of months. This way I can see if the idea works and what needs to be improved without incurring a lot of cost.

Fast, simple, small. It’s how all great ideas start.

creativity

In the pause: How to destroy all your demons

Christa Avampato

“Do not just slay your demons; dissect them and find out what they’ve been feeding on.” ~ The Man Frozen in Time

Even the most well-adjusted, confident, and kind people have occasional thoughts and feelings in which they feel less-than. I don’t need to look any further than my mirror to find someone who fits that bill. And while I can play the game of fake it ’til I make it with the best of them, the most effective treatment I’ve found is to really get at the root of my own negative self-talk. Hack away at that root, and there is so much more freedom and joy that gets unlocked.

For example, whenever I’m searching for a new job opportunity, I read the role description and if I don’t fit one bullet my first reaction is to move on. I’ve learned that this is a direct result of my inner perfectionist (which causes plenty of other challenges for me, but let’s just stick to this one for now.) If I can’t do something 99.9% perfectly, I’m obsessing about that 0.1%.

As an adult, I’ve learned to constantly put myself in the role of being a beginner to counter this. Along the way, I have grown my skill sets, met incredible people, traveled to stunning places, and dare I say it, become a recovering perfectionist. I don’t know that I’m ever going to completely get rid of that perfection instinct, but I do know that I control it now and it doesn’t control me. I’ve learned to congratulate myself for trying something new, even when it’s a complete disaster. I’ve learned to be my own best cheerleader and my own best company. I’ve learned to value my strengths and to no longer fear failure.

And as for those job applications, I send them off. I don’t take myself out of the running for anything that sounds interesting to me. My friend, Brooke, once told me years ago that we are all born knowing nothing. We all start at zero. We learn everything we need to learn just by going through life . And that process never stops, so why stop ourselves? Now that’s what I call slaying a demon and then eating its lunch.

creativity

In the pause: A lesson about listening from Tupac Shakur

Christa Avampato

“If you let a person talk long enough you’ll hear their true intentions. Listen twice, speak once.” ~Tupac Shakur

Less than two months into my 2017 resolution to pause every day and really listen, I’ve learned a lot. Much more than I expected. It’s fascinating to hear what people really say, and what they don’t say. It’s surprising to me to hear the narrative that plays in my own head during certain situations. These days we are subjected to all kinds of glossy marketing, slick slogans, and catchy soundbites. To really see what’s going on, we have to take a step back. Maybe even a few steps back. Let things come into focus. Listen rather than waiting to speak.

People are very adept at elevator pitches. We’ve got biases, lens of experience that alter our point-of-view, and objectives. That’s part of being human and having this massive cerebral cortex. It’s a blessing and it’s also a curse; we often get in our own way. I’ve found the best way to combat this is to just stop and listen. It’s a highly under-rated and rare skill. Our society doesn’t reward it, but life in general does. When we listen, we make better decisions because we have richer information. When we listen, we increase our sense of focus because our perspective is more comprehensive. And this combination of information  and perspective gives us the confidence to take action. The actions I’m going to take in 2017 are beginning to take shape. They’re exciting and a little bit scary, but I can handle it.

So far on my listening tour through 2017, that’s what I’ve got. I’m looking forward to what happens next.

creativity

In the pause: Reflections on my college years at Penn from an Amtrak train

Christa Avampato

I recently took an Amtrak train up to New York for a long weekend. I love the train for many reasons, especially because it gives me a chance to roll past my alma mater – the University of Pennsylvania. I always get a little teary eyed. Those years were hard for me. I learned a lot. Struggled a lot. Grew a lot. And growth is often painful. It’s uncomfortable to become something. It’s scary and difficult. And yet, it must be done. To become the people we’re meant to be, we have to grow and evolve. We need to learn hard, painful lessons about life, about the world, and about ourselves. Sometimes I think it’s a miracle of the highest order that I even survived. Do I wear my diploma like a badge of honor? You bet I do. I earned every letter of that sucker and then some. I wouldn’t want to do it over again, and yet I’m grateful for it. It taught me to stare into the fire and smile instead of flinch. And that kind of strength is invaluable. It erases fear.

creativity

In the pause: More data on our national economy

Christa Avampato

As a follow-up to my post a few days ago (Leading Economic Indicators We All Need to Watch), I had a conversation with one of my former business professors. I wanted to get his perspective on my concerns and about the economy to see if there were other indicators I should be watching. He mentions a few here and details some of his very real concerns as well. He is someone who constantly watches the global and national economy, as well as the stock market, so I trust his advice, guidance, and thoughtfulness. I hope this is helpful to you as well.

“Christa:

Nice to hear from you!

Like you, I’m feeling a bit uneasy about the stock market right now. Very high P/E multiples. To justify those prices will take an extraordinary breakout of growth in the US (and world) economy. The saving grace is that the financial industry still looks fairly stable—bigger capital bases than in 2007, more conservative lending, etc. If there is a downturn in the next year or so, I don’t think it will have the force of 2008. But still, a downturn is a downturn and something to be prepared for.

Your blog post offers some very good advice. I encourage people to keep 12-18 months’ worth of living expenses in fairly safe and secure investments. And I remind them of the old adage that there are two ways to be rich: one is to have a lot of money; and the other is to have simple needs. Avoid running up debt balances (except for education and a home mortgage). And the most important asset one has is between one’s ears: keep learning so as to stay valuable to your employer—that’s the best defense against a layoff.

Hope these comments help.

Be well.”

 

creativity

Wonder: What do you do now if you work in healthcare?

Christa Avampato

Working for a financial services firm during the recession that started in 2007 has proven to be quite a blessing now that I have some distance from it. Just as the economy was in turmoil then, there are a number of industries now that face similar challenges to their business models and my current industry, healthcare, is one of them.

From this moment forward, I spend my time thinking about what we do now that the Affordable Care Act (ACA) may be repealed or recast in any number of ways. What products, services, and systems can help protect our most vulnerable people? I couldn’t have imagined that the painful lessons I learned in financial services from 2008-2012 would be useful in this way and so soon, but life’s like that sometimes. We go through hardship and difficulty because they have something to teach us that we will be able to use to help others down the line. I will try to hang onto that tough and necessary lesson in the coming months and years.

creativity

Wonder: The greatest lesson of life

Christa Avampato

One of the greatest blessings of being Phineas’s mom is that he makes me remember that every moment counts. There isn’t a single walk, snuggle, or smile that I take for granted with him. Yesterday when I had to take him to the ER for his back again, I was reminded, painfully so, that we have only so much time and that every day is a gift that we are never promised. Each day deserves the best we can give. There isn’t any time to waste. While I wish that realization wasn’t so heavy, maybe it needs to be. Maybe that truth is so significant that we need to feel the weight of it to really understand it.

For the next few days I’ll be home for most of the time monitoring Phineas to make sure his medication and rest is working. I’ll be writing, doing yoga, and meditating on just how lucky I am to care for a being that has taught me the most important lesson of life with absolute certainty—that we must do as much good as we can wherever we are with whatever we’ve got, and be grateful for the opportunity to do so.

creativity

Wonder: Practice doesn’t make us perfect

Christa Avampato

“You’ve got to learn your instrument. Then, you practice, practice, practice. And then, when you finally get up there on the bandstand, forget all that and just wail.” ~Charlie Parker

There are a lot of life lessons to be learned from music and musicians, and this is one of the greatest. In music and life, we practice not to get that practiced material perfect but to develop the muscle to do whatever we need to do when the time comes. Practice teaches us to leap and land on our feet, to think and act in harmony, and to roll with whatever is thrown at us. Practice gives us confidence, experience, and grace. Practice doesn’t make us perfect; it makes us perfectly prepared to handle anything.

creativity

Wonder: Trust the timing of your life

Christa Avampato

We have to trust the timing of our lives. Maybe you haven’t met the love of your life yet, or you haven’t quite found the right home, job, city, or hobby. Maybe things are leaving your life in greater numbers than you’d like and you’re looking around at a lot of metaphorical or physical empty space.

Please take this post as a sign that what is happening to you now must be the thing that happens in order for you to become the person you’re meant to be with the life you’re meant to have. All of this—the good, the bad, and the ugly—is driving you toward your best self. It’s helping you evolve, grow, learn, and discover. Sometimes these things are difficult and uncomfortable. Sometimes there isn’t a way to know what’s going to happen next no matter how much we plan. There will never be enough plan Bs (or Cs or Ds or Es!) to give us 100% security.

The vast majority of life is unknown and unknowable. The best we can do is trust the process, trust our ability to persevere, and trust that what matters most is the learning. That’s where all great progress begins.