Tag: kindness

creativity

Getting through breast cancer awareness month as a survivor

Christa Avampato
Photo by Angiola Harry on Unsplash

Today is the 4-year anniversary of my breast cancer diagnosis. Everything is pink as far as the eye can see. It’s breast cancer awareness month, and the awareness is everywhere. If it exists in solid form, it can be made pink. This month helps raise awareness around the importance of screening, early detection, research, causes, and symptom identification. 

As a breast cancer survivor, all this awareness can be triggering. It can bring back difficult memories, re-ignite fears, and cause those dreaded what-if questions that are often just a breath away. As a survivor myself, I use every day to advocate for cancer survivors and those who know a survivor. Here is a list of how survivors can care for themselves during this sensitive month, and how you can provide support for the survivors in your life.

For survivors:
1.) It’s okay to acknowledge fears. Acknowledging them is the first step toward moving through them. It’s also important to remind yourself that these are future fears. they have not happened. They are not your present. 

2.) Be kind to yourself. Spend time with others. Go for a walk. Eat nutritious food. Do something you love. Find joy. In moments of difficulty, don’t judge yourself. Give yourself grace. 

3.) When those what-ifs creep in, remind yourself how far you’ve come and all you’ve overcome. Getting through cancer and treatment is a long, often-lonely journey. When you look back at your road, be proud of all you’ve faced and how you’ve grown.

4.) Remind yourself of the gifts. Cancer is terrible. There’s no way around that. It also gives incredible gifts. I grew closer to people during and after cancer. I have even more gratitude. My heart holds even more love. I don’t have bad days anymore. Every day is a good day because I get to have it. It wasn’t so long ago that I almost didn’t get a tomorrow. At several points in my journey, I was on the brink of dying. That I’m here at all is a miracle my doctors still don’t fully understand. As my surgeon says, “We don’t question the good.” Just live. Really live. 

5.) Share your story. There are people who are where you were. Be a symbol of who they can be on the other side of cancer. This helps you and them. 

For those who know a survivor:
1.) Check in on them. Ask them how they’re doing. Be a safe person for them to open up to. Being there for them is an incredible gift. 

2.) Donate to breast cancer organizations in the name of the survivor. No amount is too small and it means a lot to survivors that other people are being helped in their name. Research saved my life and I’m part of multiple research studies that are helping others. It’s empowering. 

3.) Do something special for them. Have a coffee date or a meal with them, plan a fun day out, give them a call, or send a card or text to tell them you’re thinking of them. All these small gestures really make a difference. Time is our most precious resource so if you want someone to know they matter to you, give them some of your time. 

creativity

The season of soft things

Christa Avampato
My view on the train to Bristol, UK. Photo by Christa Avampato.

It is the season of soft things. Warm tea. Thick blankets. Crackling fires. Cozy sweaters. Candle light. Woollen socks. Hugs. Laughter. Kindness. Whispers. Dreams. The world seems especially hard right now, with sharp edges that cut and harm. I find myself craving comfort, ease, and quiet. Seeking out people who exude warmth, welcome, and joy.

Our world, especially our working world, often demands structure and immutable processes. Too often telling us what is and has been must continue to be. This relentless beat can make me tired and worn. It’s in these moments that I remind myself the value of flexibility, the ability to bend so we don’t break.

We so often prize efficiency and abhor redundancy, until we recognize that nature in all her glorious wisdom has survived and thrived for nearly 4 billion years because of her integrated systems that are stronger than the sum of the parts, with pieces that back up one another so that as a united whole they can weather the storms, accommodate change, and retain balance, even and especially in crisis. And there are always storms, and change, and crises.

Nature built herself to flex, to make room, to expect the unexpected, to support. What if that became our goal, for ourselves, our organizations, our government, our world? How then might be change, grow, evolve, and be? I suspect that in this season of soft things, I may find answers to those questions by the time the light of spring returns.

creativity

Joy today: Science visually shows how bullying impacts life

Christa Avampato

New York fifth grader, Samantha Petraglia, demonstrates the impact of bullying in her science project by using an unlikely subject—a plant. The results? In 6 days, the bullied plant began to die. The one that was encouraged thrived. They had the same water, the same sunlight, and the same space on the shelf. Kindness matters; kindness makes all the difference.

Link to the full news story here:
https://newyork.cbslocal.com/2019/05/15/bullied-plants-project-bullying-samantha-petraglia-long-island-coalition-against-bullying/

 

creativity

A Year of Yes: Two stories to make your Sunday—The Great Monarch Migration and buying textbooks for a student

Christa Avampato

I have to share these two stories with you because they encapsulate just why “yes” is the word I’m embracing for 2018:

Bookstore employee writes this on Facebook after “little old lady” shocks everyone at the register with her kindness to a student
http://dailyheadline.com/an-old-lady-paid-for-a-customers-books-then-she-said-this-and-left-him-tears/

Entomologist Phil Torres goes to Mexico to record the Great Monarch Migration. “This is what it’s like to be surrounded by a million butterflies.”

 

 

 

creativity

A Year of Yes: Meeting an inspirational scientist at The Explorer’s Club

Christa Avampato

The world is a magical place. At about 12:30am, I got a direct message on Twitter from a paleontologist whose work I greatly admire. (He discovered the largest dinosaur on record to-date.) He happened to be here for work and asked if I’d like to meet him at the Explorer’s Club before his evening train back to Philly. We met on Twitter in the Fall when I was tweeting about how much I loved his book, but I’ve never met him in real life. Since this is my Year of Yes, I accepted the invitation without hesitation. (And truth be told, even if this wasn’t my Year of Yes, I would have accepted!)

He has been a big supporter of my book and read it with his 10-year-old son. When I mentioned to him that I’d love to go to the Explorer’s Club because Emerson’s second book will have a scene there that will send her off on her next journey, he reached out to the head of public affairs and to their lead archivist to arrange for me to meet them during our visit today so that I would be given access to any help from them when writing my book. I. Was. Stunned.

Additionally, we talked about science education, the power of effective science communication, and dinosaurs (of course). I also learned a lot about his own personal and professional story that led him to where he is today. He is nothing short of inspirational. I honestly felt like I’ve known him for years and I could have stayed there for many hours chatting with him.

“Yes” is a powerful word. Kismet and synchronicity play a role for all of us if we stay open to possibility. Kindness and graciousness are immense gifts that cannot be measured. Twitter is an amazing tool to create connections that otherwise may never happen.

creativity

2018: A Year of Yes

Christa Avampato

My 2018 resolution can be summed up in one word: Yes. My friend, Ria, recently told me about an article she read in which the author explained that when you commit to saying yes, your day ends up in a completely different place than where it started. And I’m all for that. Yes to:

    • adventure
    • travel
    • learning
    • passion
    • creativity
    • exploration
    • joy
    • opportunity
    • community
    • building a better city, country, & world
    • kindness
    • helping others

I’m going to make 2018 the best year of my life so far in every way. And I’m going to lift others as I rise. We’re doing this.

creativity

In the pause: It’s time to be patient with yourself

Christa Avampato

Be patient with yourself. You’re getting there, wherever there is.

Right now I’m in the process of doing the equivalent of crate training Phineas. He didn’t respond well at all to an enclosed crate when he was younger but he’s making good progress, knock on wood, behind a gate that keeps him in the back of the apartment away from the door and the too-loud lobby of my building. Crate training takes discipline, patience, and time, three things I am also trying to give to myself as I give them to him.

We all want what we want right now. It takes time to learn a new skill. It takes patience to let ourselves evolve and grow into the very best version of ourselves. As hard as I drive myself to achieve and succeed, I also try to give myself a break and celebrate every once in a while. I look back on my life and see how far I’ve come from my days on the apple farm. It’s been a long and winding road. It wasn’t easy though from my view now, life is pretty spectacular despite the many difficulties along the way and the challenges I’m facing now. I can’t help but have this overwhelming feeling that everything really is going to be okay eventually. I’ll find what I need in every area of my life. It’s going to take time and effort, but it’s out there. It’s out there for you, too. Keep going.

creativity

In the pause: Be beautiful you

Christa Avampato

“She woke up every morning with the option of being anyone she wished. How beautiful it was that she always chose herself.” ~Tyler Kent White

There is something so beautiful about people who choose authenticity, who are exactly who they are in every setting, with every person, every time. It feels good to be with these people. They make us want to live out loud.

As you go through life, I hope you find these people, hold them close, and let yourself follow their example. Be who you are. Life is too short and too precious to waste your time trying to be anyone else. And the world needs you, exactly as you are, right now. Surround yourself with people and in settings that appreciate everything that you are and everything that you have to offer. Don’t settle for anything less.

creativity

Wonder: A kindness story about my dog, a handyman, and Star Wars

Christa Avampato

I have a very special gratitude story today about the power of community and kindness. Nick is one of the handy men in my apartment building. He’s always helping people out and doing odd jobs around our neighborhood, too. He and Phineas are good pals. Yesterday, Nick was outside working with no gloves in single digit temps. I bought Nick some warm gloves and Nicole, the concierge in my building, helped me get that gift to him.

Nicole said he was so surprised and touched that he started crying. She said he hopped on his bike with the gloves on and headed off to help a friend who was having car trouble. Apparently, Nick stopped into our local Petco and asked what would be a good small toy for a dachshund. The manager of the Petco asked “Are you buying a gift for Phineas? He’s our best customer!” Nick said he was and told him about the gloves I bought for him. The manager at the Petco was so happy to hear this story that he gave Nick a limited edition Star Wars dog toy of Kylo Ren to give to Phinny. They put it in a gift bag, and Nick left it with Nicole for us.

Phineas started jumping around when we opened it in the lobby, and Nicole said he and Nick had the same reaction. I learned that Nicole’s been having a really tough year and she said today made her believe in the goodness of people and the meaning of Christmas.

Doing big things that help a lot of people is a wonderful thing. And there are also dozens of small things we can do right where we are to help people in our community. Kindness and generosity are two of the greatest resources we have. Let’s use them to make the world and our own little corner of it better for others. Today I’m grateful for my community and the opportunities I have to help my neighbors.

creativity

Wonder: Let your love be a resource for the world

Christa Avampato

“In one soul, your soul, there are resources for the world.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thanks to the disaster that is the DC metro, I walked 18 blocks in the pouring rain during rush hour yesterday. I was angry and feeling very sorry for myself when I walked by a man who was hungry and asked me for some change to get a slice of pizza. I gave myself a mental “snap out of it” and then I bought him some pizza. Wherever we are, there is good work to do. We don’t always see it. Sometimes we’re so caught up in our own inner dialogue that we miss the opportunity in front of us. I certainly was. The man thanked me for the pizza, and I thanked him for letting me help.