Tag: change

creativity

Wonder: What’s the worst that could happen?

Christa Avampato

I was obviously very upset sitting in the waiting room at the animal hospital as the doctors checked Phin’s back early Tuesday morning. I was sad that he was in so much pain, and also grateful that we have such amazing care for him here in D.C. Then, I asked myself “what’s the worst possible thing that could happen?” He would have a back issue that couldn’t be fixed and we’d get wheels for him. And that’s exactly what we’d do so long as he could still have a good quality of life. (Check out this amazing company, Eddie’s Wheels, that has made wheelchairs for dogs for 20 years!) He’d still be my little guy and I’d still be his mom. And that’s really what matters.

(I’m happy to report that he is doing extremely well on rest and meds so I feel very hopeful that he’ll make a full recovery! He just wishes he could get out there for a long walk around the neighborhood. That won’t happen for about 3 weeks. Rest is the most important part of his recovery.)

 

creativity

Wonder: The greatest lesson of life

Christa Avampato

One of the greatest blessings of being Phineas’s mom is that he makes me remember that every moment counts. There isn’t a single walk, snuggle, or smile that I take for granted with him. Yesterday when I had to take him to the ER for his back again, I was reminded, painfully so, that we have only so much time and that every day is a gift that we are never promised. Each day deserves the best we can give. There isn’t any time to waste. While I wish that realization wasn’t so heavy, maybe it needs to be. Maybe that truth is so significant that we need to feel the weight of it to really understand it.

For the next few days I’ll be home for most of the time monitoring Phineas to make sure his medication and rest is working. I’ll be writing, doing yoga, and meditating on just how lucky I am to care for a being that has taught me the most important lesson of life with absolute certainty—that we must do as much good as we can wherever we are with whatever we’ve got, and be grateful for the opportunity to do so.

creativity

Wonder: Be open to possibility

Christa Avampato

In the blink of an eye, things can change in ways we never expected. We fall in love with a friend, a neighborhood, a home, a city, a job, a pet. We find ourselves drawn to something that maybe we liked (or not) on the surface and then as we spend more time (sometimes by force) we find our outlook changes.

That’s what happened to me and my neighborhood. Even as little as a month ago I just wasn’t sure about the east side of the city. And then something even strange happened—I actually started to see the people and buildings around me with brand new eyes. I said hello to 23 people this morning: construction workers, neighbors, store managers, and even just people passing by. There was almost a lightness to it.

I was walking little Phineas, and he’s got a little trot that could make even the grumpiest person smile. Still I felt some kind of shift as I saw the new construction rising up and beginning to shape what this collection of buildings and streets will eventually look like.

Being open to possibility is a wonderful thing.

creativity

Wonder: Trust the timing of your life

Christa Avampato

We have to trust the timing of our lives. Maybe you haven’t met the love of your life yet, or you haven’t quite found the right home, job, city, or hobby. Maybe things are leaving your life in greater numbers than you’d like and you’re looking around at a lot of metaphorical or physical empty space.

Please take this post as a sign that what is happening to you now must be the thing that happens in order for you to become the person you’re meant to be with the life you’re meant to have. All of this—the good, the bad, and the ugly—is driving you toward your best self. It’s helping you evolve, grow, learn, and discover. Sometimes these things are difficult and uncomfortable. Sometimes there isn’t a way to know what’s going to happen next no matter how much we plan. There will never be enough plan Bs (or Cs or Ds or Es!) to give us 100% security.

The vast majority of life is unknown and unknowable. The best we can do is trust the process, trust our ability to persevere, and trust that what matters most is the learning. That’s where all great progress begins.

creativity

Wonder: NoMa rising in Washington, D.C.

Christa Avampato

20160917_101005My neighborhood is being torn down and built back up at lightning speed. Within 2 blocks of my apartment there are no less than 8 new high-rise buildings.The construction cycle is now a 24/7 operation as builders scramble to get these spaces dug out and enclosed before the winter hits. At one point there was so much construction on my block that some builders had to get night permits for demolition because they couldn’t fit anymore equipment on the street.

In 3 years, maybe even less, this neighborhood will be unrecognizable compared to today. The physical space will look different. There will be many more people and businesses to serve them. A new sense of community seems to be forming though it still has a long way to go.

People in my building are losing their minds, complaining to my management company about the noise. I lived in New York City for many years so for me this is a bit par for the course. But I’ve never seen it up close to this extent. I go out onto my small balcony and I can literally see buildings rising up out of the ground. It’s fascinating and magical. It oddly, surprisingly, feels like home to be in the midst of so much change and organized chaos. It gives me hope.

creativity

Wonder: Why hope matters

Christa Avampato

Don’t you hate it when you’re having a tough time and someone’s first reaction is, “oh you’ll be fine.” My first thought is always “how the hell do you know that?” And then my second thought is, “they’re right. I am going to be fine. I’ve gotten this far, haven’t I?”

In the midst of any kind of stress, it’s easy to feel down-trodden, to feel like it’s never going to get better. But bit by bit, step by step, day by day, we can and do make things better. I know it’s not easy. I know that it sometimes feels like we’re going backward or in the completely opposite direction of where we think we want to go. And maybe you are. When that happens to me, in time I realize that’s the way I had to go—completely out of the way!—to find something or someone I needed to move forward.

Goodness knows there is plenty to be disappointed about in the world today. Flip on the news in any channel of your choice, and it’s there front and center – violence, heartbreak, and a massive amount of fear. It makes you want to tear your hair out, right? I certainly feel that way at some point every day. And then I have to remind myself that yes, I am just one person and yes, I can have an impact. I can at least shape my very tiny corner of the world through my time, energy, attention, and funds. Once I remember that, I find myself replacing those feelings of helplessness with pure hopefulness. And I’ve found that hope is where all great change begins.

creativity

Wonder: Handling fear that comes with a big step

Christa Avampato

A big step in life, even if it’s a welcome and wonderful thing, still carries some fear with it. That happened to me yesterday. It looks like I’ll be making a big change ahead of schedule. I was planning to make this change in about a year but for reasons I never saw coming, I need to make it sooner rather than later. Off and on all day, my heart would race, my breath would get shallow, and my mind wandered. I needed some grounding so I sat down, closed my eyes, put my hands on my heart, and just focused on my breath.

What I realized is that it’s the anticipation of taking the big step that is scarier than actually taking it, whether that step is a new job, a new home, a move, or a drastic change in routine. Once we know we need to adapt to a new reality, we just do. Then we go on and do the best we can. And so, I did. Thanks to the many friends who helped me to see that this is the right way forward.

creativity

Wonder: When we fall, we have the chance to rise (eventually)

Christa Avampato

It’s okay to fall apart; it’s the only way we can make ourselves whole again. This weekend I was talking to a close friend who’s been having a tough time. I can absolutely relate. There’s a desire to be positive, to see the silver lining, and be grateful for what our misfortunes give us. There’s also an equally strong desire to yell, break things, and act on the frustration. At times, we can feel completely insane and off-balance when we’re in this cycle. It’s okay to feel that way; I certainly have. We have a right to feel all of our feelings, and no one (and I mean no one!) has a right to tell you not to feel the way you do.

There are several points in my life when I’ve felt this way. It’s downright painful and frightening. You feel like you’re losing it. I’ve been in that position, and I’ve also been in that position when I felt completely and totally alone. So here’s a promise I make to every friend I have—with me, you can lose it. Cry, yell, get out whatever thoughts and feelings you need to release. I’m not going to judge you. Not at all. We’ve got to do more for each other to create that safe space. The world will be better off if we can stop putting on a brave face and keeping up appearances. Sometimes, things are just awful and it’s healthy to recognize that. Yes, you’ve eventually got to move on and that can only happen if you can first feel every awful thing you need to feel. We rise, eventually, by first allowing ourselves to fall.

creativity

Wonder: Give yourself time

Christa Avampato

I’ve been at new job for six weeks and I’m working hard to get up-to-speed in a new industry with a product that has an aggressive timeline to launch. I’m learning so much and by the end of the week I’m spent. And I know I still have so much to learn.

I’m very likely to be tough on myself expecting myself to be 100% up-to-speed with very little runway. While that helps me in some respects it certainly harms me in others. Six weeks, especially in the summer, isn’t much time at all. I’ve got many more questions to ask and many more things to learn. And that’s okay. I’m climbing the mountain one step at a time, and I’m giving myself the chance to reflect on every view.

creativity

Wonder: Smithsonian Magazine goes deep into race in America

Christa Avampato

20160902_085331If you want to get deep into the discussion around race in America and approach it from a number of different perspectives, I can’t recommend the latest issue of Smithsonian Magazine enough. I’m completely engrossed in every story. It’s an incredible example of journalism that combines a long lens historical perspective, evocative personal stories of struggle and triumph (in equal amounts), and a future vision of hope that we can fully accept and explore our past and not be solely defined by it. Just amazing.