It’s okay to fall apart; it’s the only way we can make ourselves whole again. This weekend I was talking to a close friend who’s been having a tough time. I can absolutely relate. There’s a desire to be positive, to see the silver lining, and be grateful for what our misfortunes give us. There’s also an equally strong desire to yell, break things, and act on the frustration. At times, we can feel completely insane and off-balance when we’re in this cycle. It’s okay to feel that way; I certainly have. We have a right to feel all of our feelings, and no one (and I mean no one!) has a right to tell you not to feel the way you do.
There are several points in my life when I’ve felt this way. It’s downright painful and frightening. You feel like you’re losing it. I’ve been in that position, and I’ve also been in that position when I felt completely and totally alone. So here’s a promise I make to every friend I have—with me, you can lose it. Cry, yell, get out whatever thoughts and feelings you need to release. I’m not going to judge you. Not at all. We’ve got to do more for each other to create that safe space. The world will be better off if we can stop putting on a brave face and keeping up appearances. Sometimes, things are just awful and it’s healthy to recognize that. Yes, you’ve eventually got to move on and that can only happen if you can first feel every awful thing you need to feel. We rise, eventually, by first allowing ourselves to fall.