creativity

In the pause: What to do with fear

It was 8:30pm last night and all of a sudden I was in my living room crying. I’ve been pouring myself in my book this week and I have a cold, but that’s not it. As I close this current chapter of my life and begin a new one, there’s a certain level of fear mixed in with my excitement. For a moment, that fear got the upper hand.

I’ve been through loads of changes like this before. I’m moved to new cities, left jobs, left relationships, started companies, closed companies, dealt with the loss of loved ones, and had great fluctuations in my incomeĀ over the years. And let’s not forget my apartment building fire, the bullet through my lobby a few months ago, and that small matter of my airplane being hit by lightning in mid-flight causing an emergency landing just before the wing fell off on the tarmac. Life’s a real kick in the pants sometimes.

The difference for me right now is that I’m so unwilling to compromise when it comes to how I spend my time. The only thing I seem to have any appetite for now is building a better world. We are facing so many challenges thatĀ I want to be a part of solving, and there are brief moments when that becomes overwhelming. Last night was one of those times.

And then J.K. Rowling flew into my inbox, like fairy godmothers often do. Her advice? “Stopping worry about paying the rent. Concentrate on your public speaking phobia.” Doing heartfelt work often requires us to take our fear and put it over there so that we can get back to what we need to do. Cry it out. Dance it out. Yell it out. Write it out. Hell, eat a donut if need be. Do whatever you have to do to exercise the fear. Then, get on with it. The world needs you.

creativity

In the pause: Philly’s Rooster Soup Co. is doing everything right in the food world

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Check out Rooster Soup Co atĀ http://www.roostersoupcompany.com/

I have to give a big shout out to Philly’s Rooster Soup Co. Recognized today as one of the best restaurants in the U.S. by Food & Wine Magazine, this tasty place produces zero waste and donates 100% of its profits to charity to help vulnerable Philadelphians live a better life. This is the kind of business we need to celebrate – good product and service, good for the planet, and good for the community. This is a triple bottom line we can all believe in and support.

creativity

In the pause: Back cover art for my book, Emerson Page and Where the Light Enters

I’ve been hard at work with the artist designing the cover of my book, Emerson Page and Where the Light Enters. Here’s our work-in-progress for the back cover. What do you think?Ā Sign up for giveaways, exclusive content, and updates atĀ https://goo.gl/forms/ZsMC4d1kN9jKpZhD3. (Please pardon the image watermark as we’re still locking down the design!)

back cover

creativity

In the pause: The secret equation to your success

I’ve been doing a lot of research on career planning as I craft the materials for ACanofCoke.com, my program to provide college- and career-readiness guidance to high school and college students who need additional support. I came across Mike Rowe’s video entitled “Don’t follow your passion. Do this instead.” I don’t agree with his entire outlook though I think his point has value. I think passion is an important part of building a life and career that brings us happiness and fulfillment. But passion isn’t enough; it’s only one part of a more complex equation:

Passion + ability + opportunity = a career (and life) worth having

Identify what you love to do. Evaluate whether or not that’s where your talent lies, or where it could lie with practice and a strong work ethic. Determine the size of the opportunity that could utilize your passion and talent, or develop a plan that creates that opportunity if it doesn’t exist.

Building each piece of the left side of that equation isn’t easy, though it’s the only way toĀ turn that right side from a dream into a reality.

creativity

In the pause: My 10-year MBA reunion at Darden

I spent the weekend happily disconnected from devices and reunited with my Darden MBA class to celebrate our 10-year graduation milestone. I went to reunion to be with friends far and near, and to revisit a place where I learned that anything is possible when we combine passion, purpose, and persistence. At Darden, I learned how to stand strong in my beliefs while balancing conviction and openness to new ideas and perspectives. It remains the greatest investment of my life, not only for the skills I gained and the knowledge I attained from my brilliant classmates and professors, but even more so for the deep friendships I found there. It’s the gift that keeps on giving, and only grows more valuable with time. I loved seeing and hugging all of you, and am already looking forward to the next time we’re all together again. Until then, know that I’m rooting for all of you to live your happiest, most beautiful lives. The best is yet to come.

 

creativity

In the pause: You need to get comfortable with rejection

Exactly two months ago, I decided to try to make ACanofCoke.com, my online college- and career-readiness service, a reality. This week I scheduled meetings with 3 NYC public high school principals to talk about doing a pilot with their students this summer and fall. It took emailing 398 principals to get this response. Hey if it’s a numbers game, then I’m ready to play.

The mission of this idea matters so much to me that I’m not bothered by the rejection. I could look at this as ~1% of the schools I emailed are interested or I could see it as ~99% aren’t. I’m going with the former.

Rejection is a part of business, art, and life. We will be rejected far more often than we are accepted – at least that’s been my experience and the experience of just about everyone I know. It’s not the amount of failure we endure, but the persistence and passion that matter most. As Babe Ruth once said, “It’s tough to beat someone who never gives up.” Keep going.

creativity

In the pause: A love affair begins, and then I meet Roy Choi.

You never forget your first time. Picture this. The year is 2007. A young Italian woman makes her way to the lower east side of Manhattan onto a small, dark, and empty street. She meets a man who leads her through a flimsy, unmarked door into a small, steamy room. Immediately, she’s intoxicated by the wild activity, the joyful chattering, and the slurping.

And so began my love affair with ramen.Ā That woman was me. The man was my friend, Michael. The door led to Minca, still my very favorite ramen I’ve ever had. The steam and wild activity came from the open kitchen, if you can even call it that. It really felt more like a giant stove with gargantuan metal pots of bubbling broth, and that was just fine with me. The slurping emanated from the giddy guests packed into a tiny dining area, and grateful just to have a place to take in the goodness from their piping hot bowls.

Since then, Michael and I have had many bowls of ramen together. He’s my ramen guru, alerting me to the latest and greatest on the art of ramen scene. He and his wonderful wife, Min, are two of my favorite dining companions. They’ve introduced me to all kinds of new foods, mostly Japanese, Korean, and Chinese, and I have happily taken it all in. I keep threatening to go visit them in China, and eventually I’m going to make good on that. I plan to eat my way through that country and enjoy every second of it!

I will admit that when Michael first asked if I wanted to go have ramen, I started laughing. “You mean those 25 cent packets of crunchy noodles with a salty flavor packet wrapped in cellophane?” I asked. Michael laughed. He said something akin to “you don’t know what you’re missing.” And he was right.

That bowl of ramen at Minca was heavenly. I was struck by the number of hoursĀ it takes just to prepare that rich and flavorful broth. I learned to appreciate the just right chewy bite of the noodles cooked perfectly to the second. And then there are all the toppings. I could go on and on, but I’d never do it justice with words. Ramen must be experienced to fully appreciate its value. To slurp it is to love it. It’s the most comforting of comfort foods.

I wrinkled by nose on Sunday when I read in the New York Times Cooking section about how to make the perfect bowl of instant ramen. “Instant ramen?” I croaked. Phineas looked over at me from his bed with an equally disapproving expression. “Look, it’s bone broth or nothing,” I said to him. He nodded approvingly and went back to snoozing. But, was I missing something? I mean, if Chef Roy Choi tells me how to make perfect instant ramen in the New York Times, then who am I to tell him he’s wrong without at least trying it?

I was at the grocery store yesterday to pick up a couple of items, and I passed by those sad-looking instant ramen packets. I picked one up, chuckled to myself the way one does when they think they know better, and put it back. Instant ramen. Ha! No way. I got to the checkout lane and at the last second doubled back. I just kept thinking about that instant ramen. Maybe it was worth a try. So I picked up the package again and decided to put Roy Choi to the test.

I’m gad I did. I used his simple recipe with a poached egg and butter. I further doctored mine using pepper jack cheese instead of American, a few dashes of hot sauce, soy sauce, and sesame oil, and topped it with a little thyme and tarragon. The result was something far different from the instant ramen I grabbed off the shelf of my grocery store. It was transformed into something delicious and satisfying that far exceeded my expectations. Not anything like Minca but certainly a fineĀ lunch. And Phineas, my little sous chef, concurred so it must be true. Roy Choi, you win. I’m sorry I ever doubted you.

https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1016583-perfect-instant-ramen

 

 

 

creativity

In the pause: The launch date for my book, Emerson Page and Where the Light Enters, is November 1, 2017

Emerson cover zoomed outYesterday was a wonderful day! My publisher and I set a launch date for my book, Emerson Page and Where the Light Enters. On November 1, 2017, Emerson’s story will be released to the world exactly three years after I started writing the first draft as part of National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo). Thumbkin Prints, an imprint of Possibilities Publishing Co., and I are planning fun giveaways, exclusive content, and fun events as pub day approaches. To stay in-the-know, take a second to sign up for my email list at https://goo.gl/forms/GwZKMm8gR3zhFVGJ2. I promise no spam, only goodness!

creativity

In the pause: Play the hand you’re dealt

“You don’t have a right to the cards you believe you should have been dealt. You have an obligation to play the hell out of the ones you’re holding.” ~Cheryl Strayed

My friend, Joi, posted this quote a few weeks ago and it was exactly the message I needed. Some of us are born with a great talent. Others of us are born into great fortunate. And still others are blessed with creativity, a strong work ethic, and / or a desire to do something that makes the world a better place in some way. Too often we focus on the piece(s) we don’t have instead of the gifts we do have.

We all need something. If we’re meant to have it, it’ll show up. I believe that. I’ve seen it happen in my own life and in the lives of others. In the meantime, our job is to work like hell to do the best we can with what we’ve got. That’s what I’ll be doing this week on a number of fronts.

What are you working on?

creativity

In the pause: The O’Reilly Factor is only the tip of the iceberg of the problems women face in the workplace

This article is a good primer on the many struggles that women face in the workplace, with one glaring omission: 50% of all workplace bullying is between a female boss and a female employee. I have been on the ugly receiving end of that scenario several times. It’s awful. And it has to stop.

Women, we must support and encourage one another just as much as we seek to right the horrible wrongs of sexual harassment. A healthy workplace will not be created if we just focus on gender disparity in all its hideous forms. For every O’Reilly, there are many more acts of micro-aggression that over time do just as much damage. This is not an issue of men vs. women. This is a human issue, and everyone needs to be a part of solving it. O’Reilly and others like him got away with his behavior for so long because too many people, men and women, looked the other way because they weren’t directly impacted.

The workplace too often lacks empathy, compassion, and true collaboration. That plays out in wage and promotion disparity, diverse representation at every level of a company, in products and product marketing, and in daily team dynamics. To solve problems in the workplace and in the world, we need to stand side-by-side, men and women, roll up our sleeves, and solve problems together.

In-fighting and aggression in any form doesn’t solve anything; it makes everything worse for everyone—employees, employers, companies, shareholders, and customers. When we go to work tomorrow, let’s not think about how we’ll get even or get our fair share. Let’s take action to make the environment better for all people. Let’s raise the tide.