Tag: time

creativity

In the pause: It’s okay to collapse

Christa Avampato

“For a star to be born, there is one thing that must happen: a gaseous nebula must collapse. So collapse. Crumble. This is not your destruction. This is your birth.” ~Zoe Skylar

We work so hard to keep things, even ourselves, from falling apart. Somehow we have managed to associate becoming undone with being completely done, forever. Don’t be ashamed of your undoing or your failure, your missteps or your losses. This is a cycle of life – catching and releasing, holding on and letting go, rising up and falling down. There’s so much to be learned and experienced in the collapse. There you can rest, restore, and rebuild. Wiser, braver, stronger, more focused, and with the knowledge that no matter what life throws at you, you will find a way to shine.

creativity

In the pause: Healing is made of magic and time

Christa Avampato

“Don’t confuse a season for a lifetime. Even your trials have an expiration date.” ~Brittney Moses

Maybe you’re going through something right now that feels sad or painful or disappointing. When we go through tough times, it’s almost impossible to imagine an end to them. But it’ll get better. And you’ll get better. It won’t be overnight. It’ll happen little by little, day by day. You’ll stand a little taller. Smile a little wider. Shine a little brighter. Healing of any kind is one part magic and two parts time. Believe in the power of both.

 

creativity

In the pause: How to destroy all your demons

Christa Avampato

“Do not just slay your demons; dissect them and find out what they’ve been feeding on.” ~ The Man Frozen in Time

Even the most well-adjusted, confident, and kind people have occasional thoughts and feelings in which they feel less-than. I don’t need to look any further than my mirror to find someone who fits that bill. And while I can play the game of fake it ’til I make it with the best of them, the most effective treatment I’ve found is to really get at the root of my own negative self-talk. Hack away at that root, and there is so much more freedom and joy that gets unlocked.

For example, whenever I’m searching for a new job opportunity, I read the role description and if I don’t fit one bullet my first reaction is to move on. I’ve learned that this is a direct result of my inner perfectionist (which causes plenty of other challenges for me, but let’s just stick to this one for now.) If I can’t do something 99.9% perfectly, I’m obsessing about that 0.1%.

As an adult, I’ve learned to constantly put myself in the role of being a beginner to counter this. Along the way, I have grown my skill sets, met incredible people, traveled to stunning places, and dare I say it, become a recovering perfectionist. I don’t know that I’m ever going to completely get rid of that perfection instinct, but I do know that I control it now and it doesn’t control me. I’ve learned to congratulate myself for trying something new, even when it’s a complete disaster. I’ve learned to be my own best cheerleader and my own best company. I’ve learned to value my strengths and to no longer fear failure.

And as for those job applications, I send them off. I don’t take myself out of the running for anything that sounds interesting to me. My friend, Brooke, once told me years ago that we are all born knowing nothing. We all start at zero. We learn everything we need to learn just by going through life . And that process never stops, so why stop ourselves? Now that’s what I call slaying a demon and then eating its lunch.

creativity

In the pause: Stop watering dead plants

Christa Avampato

“Sweetheart, listen to me. You’ve got to stop watering dead plants.” ~Anonymous

So many of us (myself very much included) do this far too often. People, we’re better than this. Truly. If a metaphorical plant is dead, let it decompose and move on. There are far better things that need your time, resources, and attention. Okay? Okay.

creativity

In the pause: The future takes time

Christa Avampato

If you ever grow weary over this next four years, I want you to remember that our present situation is not our future. The tide is already turning. And while this present moment seems almost unbearable, know that the majority of America believes in a brighter, better way. Our only job is to hold the space until tomorrow is today. The future takes time.

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creativity

In the pause: The passing of time is your friend

Christa Avampato

Knowing that we only have a finite amount of time a gift because it helps us figure out what matters. It helps us understand what we want to do and who we want to spend our time with. I was recently offered an opportunity – a wonderful opportunity – but when I put it through the filter of “is this really how I want to spend the next few years that I will never be able to get back?” it was very easy to turn it down. If 2016 taught us anything, it’s that time is the most precious and sacred thing we have. Let’s honor our own time and the time of others as the priceless gift that it is.

creativity

Wonder: How to use time to your advantage

Christa Avampato

A few weeks ago I read the book The Power of When. It’s a quick read that helps each reader understand their chronotype—when they have maximum brain power and do their best work. I’ve read books like this before but this is the first one that’s helped me really understand when and why I do my best work. It’s not a perfect match for me, but in terms of my sleep and work hours, it’s a pretty good fit.

Like about half of people, I’m a bear:

  • I like to get 7-8 hours of sleep and wake easily once I’ve rested enough (I can’t tell you what a relief it is to have this after years of insomnia)
  • I do my best work between 10am and noon
  • a walk before lunch and a quick 20-minute nap or some meditation around 2pm help to keep up my energy
  • by 3pm I’m ready to leave my desk and be with people
  • I love food
  • I love my friends
  • Have a can-do attitude and enjoy having time to relax

In the new year, I’m going to try to make this schedule more of a reality so that 2017 becomes my best year yet. If you want to take a 45-second quiz time find out which of the 4 personality types you are, check out: http://thepowerofwhenquiz.com/

creativity

Wonder: A much-needed pep talk and 5 things to be grateful for every day

Christa Avampato

“You aren’t doing great, but you aren’t drowning and that is something.” ~The Secret Life of Pets (Duke to Max)

My sweet friend, Cara, has been doing an exercise on Facebook that I really love. Every day she posts 5 things she’s grateful for. These aren’t the same, stale, stereotypical responses to questions like this. She gets down into the details. These are 5 practical things that made her life better that day. They are often small things, things that we overlook all too often, and I always look forward to reading her posts. With Christmas around the bend and the new year not far behind, I’m inspired to take up this idea, too. So on my social media platforms, you’ll see a nod to 5 things that I appreciate that day. Because look, things may not be better, but recognizing the good makes me feel better, and that, as Duke would say, is something.

creativity

Wonder: In each pause, I hear the call

Christa Avampato

“In each pause, I hear the call.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

This weekend, I took another pause. It was a long week last week, filled with its fair share of frustration in a number of ways, so I tried my best to sit back this weekend, rest, and recuperate. I caught up with a lot of friends to talk about some ideas I have, watched movies, and made a lot of delicious food. I also spent a significant amount of time sleeping and snuggling with Phin. And something great happened by Sunday night: I saw a pretty complete and happy picture of a way forward. It seemed like every magazine I leafed through, every commercial I saw, and every idea I heard had some sort of significance to what I’m doing and where I’m going. Like little guideposts, they were showing me the way. Too often, I’ve thought of pausing as unproductive. It’s not; it’s vital. I’m excited it’s becoming a regular habit of mine. Pause, and be glad.

 

creativity

Wonder: Harry Reid’s advice on how to spend our time

Christa Avampato

“Do the choices we make about how we spend our time keep us in touch with what we believe in, and what is real in our own lives?” ~Harry Reid, retiring Senator from Nevada

Today I read Senator Reid’s farewell published in the New York Times.Though most of his letter addresses the 100 Senators who will be in session come January 2017, this statement about how we spend our time applies to all of us. It’s something I am deeply considering as we round the corner on the new year. It’s something that will cause me to make some big changes in the coming year because ultimately how we spend our days is how we spend our lives. Moments add up to hours to days to months to years. I don’t want to waste any of mine in any way—not for comfort, ease, or the sake of a paycheck. It has never been easier in the history of the world for us to do incredible things that help build a world that we’re proud to call home. And if I’m not spending my days aspiring to that, then I am wasting my time. So onward and upward with a full and purposeful heart.

(And one comment on Harry Reid’s letter: he will be leaving the Senate for the final time when this new administration flips and that departure seems tinged with a mixture of relief and grief that he’s going. He never envisioned Donald Trump as President, particularly since Trump lost the popular vote by almost 3 million votes. (A new record!) I’m grateful for his service and admire his example of how to make a difficult system simpler, more efficient, and more effective. It’s not an easy thing to do, and he should be celebrated for his role in moving closer to a Washington that works.)