Tag: love

creativity

This just in: You can build a beautiful life – a lesson from Marc Maron and James Taylor

Christa Avampato
James Taylor
James Taylor

I was hypnotized by Marc Maron’s recent WTF podcast episode in which he interviews James Taylor, one of my favorite musicians. Taylor’s life has been a winding road that was often dark, twisted, and lonely. To hear his smooth and comforting voice, the voice I first heard as a young teenager and can never get enough of, that harrowing journey isn’t always apparent.

This interview, the most raw and honest I’ve ever heard Taylor give (and as a huge fan I’ve heard many!), often left me teary-eyed and profoundly grateful that he is still with us and still making music. Now 32 years sober, Taylor is in love and making us fall in love with his music all over again via his new album, Before This World. His music and the people in his life, including friends and family, helped him make that climb out of the depths and into the light. Taylor and Maron reminded us that change, growth, and healing are difficult, but possible.

With his trademark familiarity and humility, Maron makes guests comfortable enough to share the stuff that hurts. I felt like I was in that garage in Los Angeles where Maron conducts most of his interviews, and that after we’d all go out and get a coffee. This is the gift of listening to podcasts and personal interviews. It’s an intense exercise in attention, connection, and awareness that’s so personal that it transports us. It’s a meditation of sorts, an opportunity to leave our own cares and worries behind, that helps us to better understand and appreciate another person’s experience and journey. And for this gift, I’m tremendously grateful to Taylor and Maron.

Listen to this interview at http://www.wtfpod.com/podcast/episodes/episode_648_-_james_taylor.

creativity

This just in: Educating young hearts

Christa Avampato
Educating hearts and minds
Educating hearts and minds

“When educating the minds of our youth, we must not forget to educate their hearts.” ~Dalai Lama

The other day I ran into someone I used to know. He’s always had a bit of a melancholy personality, but he seems to have gone even further down that sad, dark tunnel. Though I felt badly for him, I also recognize that there’s nothing I can do for him except hope that someday he digs himself out of it. It’s the tough thing about loving and caring for adults: they make their own choices and we can only influence them through example.

Kids, however, are different. We can have a much bigger impact and impression on them as they grow and develop into adults. And this is why education in the most holistic sense is so critical. A moment in a child’s life, good or bad, can completely change the trajectory of his or her life, and often does. While there’s no doubt that we need to focus on growing their knowledge base, let’s also remember that educating their hearts—letting them know how much they are valued and that they need to value others—is at least as important.

Love can, and should, be taught.

creativity

This just in: The 3 things we all need to hear

Christa Avampato
The message we all need
The message we all need”3 things students want to hear:

“3 things students want to hear: I believe in you. You have a purpose. How are you?”

This was posted by Edutopia (George Lucas Education Foundation) this week. While it’s positioned as what we need to tell students every day, it’s something we all need. This is something we should give to others and also expect to receive in return from everyone in our lives. We all deserve this level of care and concern.

creativity

This just in: Look right through unhappiness with joy

Christa Avampato
Hang on to your joy
Hang on to your joy

“Start ignoring people who threaten your joy. Literally, ignore them. Say nothing. Don’t invite any parts of them into your space.” ~Alex Elle

Look right through people who interrupt, disturb, or attempt to steal your joy. They’re not your work to do. They aren’t your responsibility. They aren’t worth your energy, time, nor effort. You go on being your magnificent, talented, beautiful self. The best you can do for them is to inspire them with the ripples of true joy flowing from you into the Universe. And if that’s not enough for them, then they aren’t enough for you.

creativity

This just in: My friend could use your love

Christa Avampato
Send love
Send love

Though I’m not a religious person, I do believe passionately in the power of community and love. One of my very dearest friends was dealt an incredible loss last week. If you have any spare thoughts, prayers, and virtual hugs, she and her family could really use them now. Let the goodness flow through you and out into the Universe in the hopes that we can brighten the skies a bit for everyone. Thank you so much.

creativity

This just in: The reason for your crappy experiences has nothing to do with you

Christa Avampato
Community
Community

When something doesn’t go your way, do you spend any time wondering “why on Earth did I have to go through THAT?” Consider this explanation:

Let’s say you’re in a relationship with someone who turns out to not be the person he represented himself to be when you first met him. It’s highly likely you’ll wonder what his purpose was in your life because now you’re really confused and hurt by the end of it all. Why didn’t the Universe just keep that guy away from you to begin with?

Take a step back because maybe it’s not all about you. Consider this: the Universe wants all of us to rise up and become our best selves, that jerk of a guy included. So you were a gift to him from the Universe. A valuable, precious, amazing gift. And, yes, you could have helped him a lot. You would have been the best thing for him. But he didn’t want the gift of you. Maybe he didn’t know how to appreciate the gift. Maybe he didn’t feel worthy of it. Maybe he didn’t think enough of himself to feel that he deserved it. Or maybe, and this is the saddest reason in my opinion, he actually doesn’t want to be happy. He’s comfortable being miserable.

Your gifts and your light are too valuable to be wasted. He didn’t appreciate the gift of you so he doesn’t get to keep it. The Universe puts an end to it all, and that’s how it has to be for your sake. This whole thing wasn’t about you at all. It was about him. The Universe would have loved nothing better than for him to evolve, but he chose not to so away you go, one way or another.

This duality of what’s in it for you and what’s in it for the system as a whole is always in play. It applies to every interaction we have in every setting. Something for you and something for someone else that together leads to something for the system of which you’re both a part. Apply it to jobs, friendships, romantic relationships, creative projects. The same principles apply.

It really isn’t all about you. It’s about all of us, together.

creativity

This just in: Why I heart Ryan Adams and loving the crap out of everything

Christa Avampato
Why I love Ryan Adams
Why I love Ryan Adams

I love Ryan Adams, and all the more so for quotes like this: “There is nothing wrong with loving the crap out of everything. Negative people find their walls. So never apologize for your enthusiasm. Never ever.”

The negative people I meet—and sadly there are so many of them out there—often think I’m overly enthusiastic, that I’m just too excited about life. And to that I say, “Someday, I hope you realize what you’re missing.”

I do love the crap out of everything—my friends, Phineas, my city, my writing, my creative projects, music, art, books, animals, nature, my home, travel. You name it and I can find something I love about it. Negative people will knock us down; that’s their choice and we can’t control it.Whether we stay down or eventually rise up is our choice and we do control that. Their behavior has nothing to do with us and everything to do with them. Their negativity is a direct reflection about how they feel about themselves, not how they feel about us.

So here’s my advice: take every wall that a negative person throws in front of you and carve a window into it. Crawl through that window and leave those negative people behind.You are not responsible for them. They don’t have anything to offer you and they don’t want the gifts you have to give. That’s their loss, not yours. You deserve to be surrounded by love; don’t settle for anything less.

creativity

This just in: Spend your time where it counts the most

Christa Avampato
Friends
Friends

Kaufman and Hart were right about so many things, especially this – you can’t take it with you. Everything that you can hold in your hands will eventually break or be tossed aside. I don’t collect things. I don’t even like the idea of having too many things beyond the basic necessities. I am constantly amazed by how few material things I need to love a good life. What I collect and cherish are the things that will last a lifetime: the amazing relationships I have with people and the memories of experiences we have together. So let’s put our attention and energy where it really counts: focused on the people who make our lives so worth living.

creativity

This just in: The one lesson I take from Pope Francis

Christa Avampato
Pope Francis in DC
Pope Francis in DC

Aside from celebrating the general spirit of Christmas, I’m not Christian. However, what I take from Pope Francis is one simple and powerful lesson: if all people everywhere took up the mantle of humility and service we would have a happier, healthier, safer, and more productive world. If we could spend some time every day putting aside self preoccupation for the sake of others, we’d all be better off.

creativity

This just in: What our eyes teach us about life and healing

Christa Avampato
Image by Sean Brown
Image by Sean Brown

My fall allergies are kicking in a bit and I’ve been sneezing up a storm. I think this caused me to have a tiny blood vessel burst in my eye so I’m looking a little funny. My coworker Rachael, who studied the intricacies of eyes and vision in grad school, explained to me that eyes are fragile but they’re also masters of healing. And that made me think that eyes are a good metaphor for life. We get hurt, knocked down, and disappointed, and when that happens we feel fragile and broken. But if we hang in there and just give ourselves some time, love, and tenderness (to quote Michael Bolton!), we find that we can heal from anything. The eyes have it, and so do we.