creativity

Day 26: Sometimes strong is the only option

The Little Prince statue outside of Villa Albertine. NYC. Photo by Christa Avampato

“You never know how strong you are until being strong is your only choice.” ~Bob Marley

When I was going through cancer, a lot of people said to me that they couldn’t do what I was doing if faced with the same situation. They meant it as a compliment and I absolutely appreciated it. The truth is that strength was my only option. The choice was be strong or die. Blunt but true (this is basically the best description of me. Ha!)

A few years ago a dear friend of mine was diagnosed with breast cancer and she had to start making the lightning fast decisions I had to make. When I was going through it, she sent me care packages and messages of love and support. The first time I saw her after her diagnosis, she gave me a huge hug and said, “I knew you were going through a lot but I had no idea just how much it was. And you had to do it during the pandemic and on your own.”

She almost sounded apologetic. I told her very truthfully, “There’s no way you could have know. There’s no way to explain to someone what it’s like to have to face a bilateral mastectomy, reconstruction, chemo, radiation, and heavy doses of medications for a decade to try to save my life.” There just aren’t words to sum up all of that – the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual strain. The only people who really understand are people who live it.

I recently heard about a program called Camp Breastie, a summer camp of sorts for breast cancer survivors organized by the nonprofit The Breasties. The article said one of the most profound benefits of the camp is that attendees don’t have to explain what they went through or how it felt because everyone there just knows. Everyone gets it. And there’s a real freedom in that. And so, I’m thinking about going next year. I’ve coached a number of people through cancer and health challenges after surviving my own. I think going to this kind of event would be a way to fill my own cup, to care for myself. It could be another source of strength; after all, building community builds us up.

I'd love to know what you think of this post! Please leave a reply and I'll get back to you in a jiffy! ~ CRA

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