Month: October 2012

adventure, creativity, decision-making, determination, integrity, work

Leap: Caution – Once You Find Your Path, You Must Take It

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest

“Happiness is a choice… sometimes, a contagious one.” ~ Milkshake

On Thursday I had an interview for a wonderful job. A dream job for many. A year ago, maybe even just 6 months ago, I would have worked my tail off to land it and then willingly packed my bags to move myself 3,000 miles to take it. That was before I clarified that my dream work involves doing very cool trend and innovation research and then using that research to build things that are useful for the world.

This job is purely the research side, and I’ve been there before. It’s a great job; it’s just not a great job for me. I need tangible results that I can point to. I need contact with end-users. I need to know that I am spending my days in service to others.

Clarity is a beautiful and rare thing when it comes to our path in our careers. It takes years and years to get there. We long for it. We chase it down. We think that all of our problems will go away once we find it. I have not found that to be the case.

Finding our path can prove to be a giant pain in the ass because once we know it, way deep down in our gut, we can’t do anything else. We have to take it. All the other shining, beautiful opportunities of what we could do pale in comparison to what we know is our reason for being.

This job carried an incredibly handsome compensation package at a company with a great culture, working for a wonderful boss whom I respect and admire. But it’s not my work to do so I turned it down on the spot. I didn’t even have to think about it. I didn’t even hesitate to say it wasn’t for me. All the perks didn’t matter because I need to do the work I’m meant to do. That’s the only option.

If I took this job, I would have to put my teaching, writing, and consulting for good causes on hold. My personal life would disappear. It’s that kind of job – 24/7, nonstop, “jump this high now” type of work. I’ve grown too used to doing what I love, too used to finding complete joy in work. There’s no turning back now.

health, running, yoga

Leap: Back to Running

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest

Maybe it’s the bright, crisp sunshine after days of rain. Maybe it’s the thought of the Chicago marathon from last weekend. Maybe it’s just time. Whatever the reason, yesterday I went back to running.

My yogi friend, Marita, did her final project for our ISHTA yoga training on yoga for runners. As a former competitive runner and someone who’s solely used yoga as exercise for the past few years, I was really intrigued and inspired by her research. After reading her paper, I realized I’m not getting all of the cardio I need for optimum health. For me, the fastest, easiest, and least expensive way to get that cardio is by lacing up my running shoes and hitting the park a couple of times per week.

I haven’t been on a good run for over a year. I hunted around in the back of my closet for my running shoes. I sunk my right foot into my shoe and felt a crunch – it wasn’t my foot that crunched but a dead bug. Maybe it’s been longer than a year since my last run? 🙂

I flushed the dead bug, put on my shoes, and headed out to teach my yoga for seniors class. After the deeply relaxing class, I took off for Central Park, the sun in my face and the wind at my back. My pace was steady, my gait smooth, and my breathing even. I could feel my good ol’ heart pumping, my lungs taking in all the fresh oxygen, and my muscles and bones getting a workout they’ve needed for far too long.

30 minutes flew by and I returned home refreshed and focused to have a productive afternoon. Somehow movement helps us to settle in. I guess when we shake things up, it’s easier to find our groove.

I’ve committed to at least 2 runs and 2 yoga classes per week to keep myself in tip top shape as I continue leaping through a life of my own design. Want to join me in this promise? Tell me about your running and yoga adventures. (And thanks to Marita for inspiring me to get going!)

creativity

Leap: Keeping Your Integrity as a Freelance Writer

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest

Today’s post was supposed to be a triumphant one. This week I had closed the gap completely and in less than 4 months figured out how to cobble together the pieces to cover all of my expenses with freelance work. That changed around 2pm yesterday when I decided that my integrity was worth more than a steady freelance writing assignment I’ve had since June.

It’s tough for me to see someone take credit for my work, no matter how well they compensate me. It happened quite a bit at my last company before I went out on my own and it’s happened to me to varying degrees as a freelance writer. In some companies, it’s a common scenario and unless you’re prepared to leave your role, it’s not an easy thing to prevent nor correct. As a writer, I’ve sometimes taken on assignments as a ghostwriter but the terms were quite clear and for only a very short period of time.

What happened to me yesterday was on another level entirely.

I have been writing a series of articles for a startup incubator since I left my corporate job. The placement was decent and the PR person placing them seemed genuinely interested in my work. Then I noticed that he began to append his own name to the byline as an editor of my work when he had not edited a shred of content. What’s worse, he not only included his name but also added in a link to his other company that had nothing to do with the startup incubator.

I wasn’t sure if this was a common industry practice so I reached out to my friend and colleague, Amanda, a tremendously talented and accomplished writer and editor. I was concerned that perhaps I was being a bit too sensitive about my work. She called BS on this kind of practice and suggested I do the same. I spoke to the PR person and his elaborate explanation for his decision made me feel even worse. I decided I couldn’t continue to write for him. The trust was gone.

I felt badly about it all afternoon but when I finally decided to walk, there was a lightness that appeared. I was spending a lot of time on these articles and though the rate was decent, I couldn’t compromise my values to keep that check coming in. Also, I need to focus my energies towards some bigger projects coming down the pike that need and deserve much more of my attention.

More importantly, I left my job 4 months ago determined to do work that generates joy and satisfaction, to create things that make this world a better place. I wasn’t doing that with this writing assignment. I was just treading the same old water when I really need to be out there charting new territory.

It would have been nice to stop using my savings to finance my new venture 2 months ahead of schedule but that would have come at far too high a price. So my time to hustle is not yet up. Luckily, I can hustle with the best of them.

art, choices, creativity, decision-making, design

Leap: Curate Your Life

Christa Avampato
Photo from Lifehacker

“Life is your art. An open, aware heart is your camera. A oneness with your world is your film.” ~ Ansel Adams

“Curating a creative life” has been my tagline for this blog for several years. At one point my obsession with change got the best of me and I toyed with changing the tagline as I thought about how I wanted to craft my career and my businesses, Chasing Down the Muse and Compass Yoga. After a couple of days of a new tagline, I changed it back. There’s nothing wrong with sticking with what works and makes us happy. I realized it’s much more than a tagline; it’s my mantra.

It would be easy for a museum curator to just get any pieces of art up on the wall but that’s not the role of a curator. He or she carefully chooses what kind of art to install, and how and why and for what purpose. An art exhibit needs to hang together. It makes a cohesive statement and the pieces support the whole.

Your life is a living, breathing house of art. You are the sole curator of it; you decide what to add, what to toss, and how it comes together. And you are the only one who gets to judge its worth and meaning. You have the best job in the world and it’s the only job you really need to do. Don’t just live your life; craft it by your own design.

choices, friendship, time, to-do lists

Leap: “Busy” is a State You Choose

Christa Avampato
Does your calendar make you feel like this? From Pinterest.

I recently had an odd turn with a friend and her frantically busy calendar.

She wanted to introduce me to someone and thought a brunch was the best way to do it. After tentatively choosing a date to run by the person she wanted me to meet, I didn’t hear back from her for over 2 weeks so when another friend suggested getting together for that same day, I took her up on the offer. I figured something must have gone awry with the brunch. My friend constantly tells me how “busy” she is and her busy-ness must have gotten the best of her this time.

When she finally did get back to me 2 days before the brunch to say it was on, I had to tell her that I made other plans since I didn’t hear from her for 2 weeks. Her response? “I can’t believe you did that! I spent a lot of time organizing this brunch and quite frankly I could have put that time toward something more valuable. I am a very busy person and if you make plans with me you need to be mindful of that!” When I explained my thought process and apologized for not being able to make it, she blew up and several other nastygrams about how busy she is flew into my inbox. The intensity of her angry response was rather disturbing, and to be honest, weird.

That same day, my dear yogi friend Cyndie sent me this brilliant article – The Busy Trap by Tim Kreider. Sychronisity is a beautiful thing. I laughed out loud at his observations about the state of being busy, our simultaneous loathing and pursuit of it. He practically quotes word for word conversations I’ve had with friends about being busy. Tim talks about his decision to choose time over money, to decidedly be less busy for the sake of creating more space in his life. He also talks very honestly of having to give up friendships with people who just didn’t have time for friendship because they chose instead to be busy.

Leading a fulfilling life doesn’t require a calendar that’s filled to capacity. It is possible to be fulfilled without being completely full. And it is possible to be productive without being worn down. Being busy and being free are choices. We make them every day.

My friend relishes her packed calendar and she wants everyone to know it. It increases her self-worth to be constantly busy and rarely available, and that’s okay. It’s just not the way I wish to live, and like Tim, this is not the kind of thinking I value in others. So she went on her (busy) way, and I went mine. And I gained a valuable insight in the process: I’d rather have a life that’s rich with people I love and the time to see them rather than one overrun by to-do lists and back-to-back-to-back appointments. Time to make some room for, well, nothing in particular.

schedule, time, work

Leap: Lessons on Work and Rest from the Common Cold, My Dog, and the Dinner Table

Christa Avampato

“There is virtue in work and there is virtue in rest. Use both and overlook neither.” ~ Alan Cohen

Last week there was a little cold traveling around my social circles. For a few days, I felt very tired. When I need to get work done, I usually just push through until I get my second wind. This time I went against the grain, closed my computer, and headed off to dreamland early for a few nights in a row. I never got the cold that was making its rounds.

My pup, Phineas, is with me most of the day now since I mostly work from my home. He is a model of good, healthy living. He sleeps when he’s tired. He plays when he has energy. He eats when he’s hungry. He doesn’t have anything on his to-do list except to go outside and run around a few times a day. Other than that, he just follows his instincts. He’s quite a little teacher for me; I’m trying to live my own life by his example.

There are a lot of wonderful gifts to be found amidst hard work. There’s also a lot to be said for walking away from work to enjoy the wonderful gifts of rest. When I get up from the dinner table, I want to feel comfortably satisfied but not bloated. I want the same balance in my schedule – just the right amount of work to feel accomplished and gratified, but not so much that I feel drained of every ounce of energy and will.

I’m not so interested in work-life balance. I just want one, cohesive life that feels fully balanced between effort and ease.

memory, running

Leap: Remembering the Chicago Marathon

Christa Avampato

11 years ago this weekend I ran the Chicago marathon. I was working in Chicago on the National Tour of the Full Monty. It was an uncertain time. September 11th happened while I was there and many of us were from New York. We felt like traders being away from our city at a time when it needed us so much. The threat of our show closing and the idea of losing our jobs hung over all of us every day. (These concerns came true just days later.)

It’s funny what we remember during challenging times. My friend and running partner, Mark, was a rock for me during training and during the race. I may have designed all of our training runs for 13 weeks but he was the one who held it all together for both of us, especially when the going got tough. For me, that happened on race day around mile 18. I was really hurting and Mark asked me this simple question, “Tell me about your dad.”

During a training run months before I had mentioned to Mark that the only time I ever thought my dad was really proud of me was when I ran. Mark wanted to know the whole story, and now at mile 18 we had plenty of time. Mark also knew I needed a serious distraction to get to the end of the race.

Running and my history with my dad are deeply entwined. When I was 16, I had a series of injuries that piled up during pre-season training that left me unable to walk for a few months and took me out of the season. 2 months later, my dad passed away suddenly and tragically. I continued to run for the following year, but I gave up any hope or desire to run while in college. The fight just went out of me.

In many ways, I ran that Chicago marathon for him and for the 16-year-old me who missed all those races years before. It was a reminder of my strength and my ability to endure. It was ironic that this would happen at what was such a low point for our nation. I will never forget the warmth, love, and support from the people of Chicago who lined the race route. They were there with cowbells, signs, and happy shouts of encouragement. I vividly remember a young women who had a huge bowl of popcorn for runners to take from as they went by and another young woman who was passing out orange slices from her front yard. It was a good, good day.

When the finish line came into sight, Mark and I had to split because they separate men and women for timing purposes at the end of the race. I took off. I felt like I was flying toward the finish. In that mad, happy dash, I shook off a lot of sadness and regret. I let go of a lot of “what might have been”s in favor of a whole lot more “look what’s up ahead”s. It was a life-affirming moment that I’ll never forget. And I owe it all to Mark and to the beautiful people of Chicago.

Happy race day to all of the runners out there, making their own memories today. I hope it’s as good to you as it was to me.

change, time

Leap: We Can’t Hide From Time

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest

Well, folks, it’s happening. Despite my decision years ago to not age, Mother Nature is refusing to cooperate. How annoying.

Phin and I were out for our morning walk earlier this week and I noticed that my distance vision was not as sharp as I remember it being. For a number of years I’ve had a very mild prescription for glasses to sharpen my distance vision. I didn’t really need them to see, just to reduce strain caused by an astigmatism. Now it seems their necessity may be upon me.

Of course I went home and immediately started Googling to find eye strengthening exercises that I’ve been doing each night before I go to bed. Mother Nature may not be willing to help me out, but she can’t tell me not to help myself.

This week I also began to find a couple of consistent white hairs, not just stray ones few and far between. At first I plucked them and dropped them in the trash convinced that this was just a fluke. My few and far between white hairs obviously just all decided to show up on the same day at the same time, but certainly others would not be joining them any time soon.

Still, I wasn’t taking any chances. And so I started to color my hair, not just to mix up my look, but because it’s now actually needed. Those white hairs are a reminder of the one thing I will never be able to do, no matter how hard I try – stop time from passing.

Why is aging so tough? Why do we fight it every step of the way (with or without Oil of Olay)?

We hang on to what we know, and we know youth. We don’t know old age. We have no idea what it has in store for us, but we’ve heard stories. Scary stories of illness and pain and difficulty. And those stories are enough to make us want to stay right where we are.

I got home yesterday to find the latest copy of Yoga Journal in my mailbox. This month’s theme? Aging, with grace. The Universe has one wicked sense of humor. It’s also supremely skilled at giving us exactly the message we need exactly when we need to hear it. If only we could quiet down long enough to hear it!

I made my way upstairs to my apartment to begin reading the messages the Universe clearly wanted me to understand, but not until after I finished my eye exercises.

communication, community, yoga

Leap: If You Listen, People Will Tell You What They Need

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest

“What comes from the heart, goes to the heart.” ~ Samuel Taylor Coleridge

I’ve been teaching a seniors yoga class for a few weeks and the enrollment is full. One woman in the class recently told me that she has been having terrible insomnia. I asked if she knew why and she told me that her son, her only child, was murdered 2 months ago and so far the investigation hasn’t turned up any leads. My heart broke, and yet I knew I had to be strong for her.

In that moment, I decided to change my class on a dime. I created the class, posture by posture, word by word, for her. By the end of the class, I could feel everyone moving a bit closer to healing. As my teacher, Cheri, always says, we are all healing from something.

I used to think that being a yoga teacher meant to create a sequence of postures, breath work, and meditation techniques. Now I know that my job is to show up, listen, and give the students what they need to be whole. What I give from my heart, goes straight to theirs.

creative, creative process, creativity, productivity, time, work

Leap: A Balance of Work and Play Leads To Our Best Creations

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest

How many times have you churned your mind over and over to come up with a solution to a problem? And how many times have you found that taking your eye off of the proverbial ball, actually helps you to see the ball more clearly so you can hit it out of the park? This happens to me all the time. I read a lot of articles and books about the science behind creativity – it’s one of my favorite subjects to study – and from the research it appears to be true for many people.

So if we know that letting go of a problem will actually help us solve it, why do we hang on so tightly? Why do we have a problem relaxing and trusting in the process in which creativity works most effectively? It could be that we’re worried that while relaxation has helped us solve problems in the past, it will somehow fail us this time. It could also be that we are programmed in this society to believe that hard work equals self-worth. Without working hard, at every moment possible, will we somehow be less worthy?

I actually love to work hard. I love the feeling of accomplishment, of feeling like my effort matters. But here’s what I don’t love – the mania that comes from having a schedule that is so ridiculously packed that I have to remind myself to breathe. To balance this tug-of-war, I break projects apart into phases and give myself what I need in each phase to do my best work.

When I am working on the creative portion of a project, I give myself downtime to solve problems. I do trust the process of creativity, but I also give myself some guidelines. I get a few hours of downtime here and a few there, and I keep checking in with myself regularly to see if any new inspiration has arrived. When I am in the implementation phase and need to get something built, I really focus to give myself more structure and less downtime so I can do a lot of work while I’m in the groove.

Like anything, it comes back to needing balance – give both sides of your brain the opportunity to strut their stuff. They need different fuel because they do different types of work. If you’re taking too much downtime, or not giving yourself enough, try switching it up and see what happens. Creativity is all about experimentation.