Tag: community

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In the pause: A shout out of thanks and gratitude to the men who supported the Women’s March

Christa Avampato

Thank you to all of the men, and especially my male friends, who supported the women’s marches all over the world. I’m grateful for all of the efforts you made to support the marches in a myriad of ways—for being at the marches, for taking care of kids so the women in your life could march, and for every text and social media message of support. It is all appreciated more than you know. I’m lucky to have you in my life. Thank you for being on this journey, for courageously standing up for women (especially in situations when men are saying and doing things that are disrespectful), and for raising your voices with ours. The world needs more of you.

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In the pause: January 21, 2017, will be remembered as the day we gave an additional meaning to boots on the ground

Christa Avampato

January 21, 2017, will be remembered as the day we gave an additional meaning to boots on the ground. This is the day that people, women and men, all races, all creeds, from all over the world came together, organized, and marched for equity, justice, freedom, and health. This is the day we took to the streets together for women’s rights, which are after all human rights, and vowed to one another that we will not stop until these rights are secured for all and forever. That is the goal I am dedicated to and I will use every breath and step I have remaining to turn it from a dream into a reality.

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In the pause: What you need to know during a protest, demonstration, or march

Christa Avampato

I know many of us will be participating in marches and protests this week and in the weeks, months, and perhaps years ahead. I’ll be at the Women’s March in Washington, D.C. I haven’t participated in anything like this before so I did a lot of research to be prepared. I wanted to pass this on to you and your friends and loved ones who may also be protesting so that we can be both safe and informed. Please feel free to share and repost. It is a lot of information but it is critical for you to have it. I’ve broken up the information into categories to make it easier for you to scan. Some of it I suggest you print out and bring with you as noted below. Though some of it applies directly to the D.C. Women’s March, much of it is applicable for any protest. (Here is a list of sister marches that are happening in every U.S. state and across 6 continents: https://www.womensmarch.com/sisters/). A sincere and heartfelt thank you to all of you who are standing up and speaking out to protect the rights of all people. Now is the time for action and I appreciate, applaud, and honor each of you who are engaged in the process of social justice.

Meeting spots and pre-march info:
1.) I am gathering a people in the lobby of my D.C. apartment building between 9:00am and 9:15am on Saturday the 21st. At 9:15am, we’ll walk to the starting point of Independence Avenue and Third Street SW (a little over a mile from my apartment). If you’d like to join us, or have friends who would like to join us, please send me a message and I’ll send you my address and cell number. The event begins at 10am. The march is not just for women. Everyone is welcome to participate in the march and I’d love to have you join us. It’s always better to march with buddies.

2.) Please fill out this form to say you’re going to the march so that they have enough relief stations, food trucks, and medical services for everyone. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdzAOhSz5i7Vw88k9z7s5crNKsjmtoFigkb1jSuAQJ3-57uKg/viewform?c=0&w=1

What to bring (and not bring) with you:
3.) Bring your charged phone, identification, a little cash, and a credit or bank card so that you can buy water and food as needed. It’s a long event and you need to stay hydrated and satiated. I’m also bringing a small water bottle as well as a small stash of medical supplies like bandaids, asprin, Neosporin, etc. Don’t count on being able to have any cell signal. Because of the projected size of the crowd, it is very likely that reception will be spotty at best during the march. D.C. has spotty cell reception to begin with. I plan to turn off my location and have the phone in airplane mode for safety reasons.

 4.) The organizers have worked very hard to make this a peaceful event so let’s do our part to support peaceful, nonviolent action. If you run into any legal issues during the march, there is a legal hotline: 202.670.6866. Write down important phone numbers on your arm such as the National Lawyers Guild hotline (212-679-5100) and friends or family members who can help you in an arrest or emergency situation. Again, I hope we don’t need this information though it is good to be prepared.

5.) No bag or a very small cross-body bag is the best bet for the march. Do not bring a large purse, backpack, or luggage of any kind. And of course, no weapons.

6.) Dress for the weather and weather very comfortable clothes. Right now, the weather is forecast to be 60 degrees and partly sunny, but make sure to check closer to the date so you dress appropriately.

7.) Signs are encouraged though please make sure they do not have sticks attached to them.

8.) Protests and marches are serious business. There is a time and place for being fun and silly; a protest is not that time and place. If you plan to take photos or video during the march, please be mindful of your surroundings and do not let your actions disrupt any of the activities. Let’s be present and mindful in the moment right where we are. If you post to social media, the hashtags for the march are #womensmarch #WhyIMarch #IMarchFor. Posting your support before and after the march is also an awesome way to get the word out and support and encourage others. The handle for the Women’s March is @womensmarch.

(About photography and videography during a protest from the ACLU): When you are lawfully present in any public space, you have the right to photograph anything that is in plain view. That includes pictures of federal buildings, transportation facilities, and the police. When you are on private property, the property owner may set rules about the taking of photographs or video. Police officers may not confiscate or demand to view your digital photographs or video without a warrant, nor may they not delete your photographs or video under any circumstances. However, they may legitimately order citizens to cease activities that are truly interfering with legitimate law enforcement operations.

Print:
9.) There are places near the march route that have opened their doors and hearts to us throughout the day. These can be used as meeting spaces and rest stops. Have this printed in case you can’t get any cell signal:
https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1Z6fsm0f8imCahdIZHDOcwzWZ1wWc2wrVF6OtGDOohfY/pub (list)
https://www.google.com/maps/d/u/0/viewer?mid=1-MbCRo0_c9N2krZ8EC_JGi6hlBQ&ll=38.89711392272274%2C-77.02499509999996&z=13 (map)

Print:
10.) The ACLU has a double-sided demonstration guide with useful phone numbers and tips. I hope none of us need this but it is good to be prepared. Have this printed in case you can’t get any cell signal.
https://www.acludc.org/sites/default/files/wysiwyg/aclu_8.5_x_11_trifold_v21-flip.pdf

Safety:
11.) Please get enough rest the night before the march, eat well the morning of, and do not drink alcohol before or during the march. It’s not safe for you or for anyone else.

12.) This is a peaceful, non-violent protest. Please be mindful of your words, actions, and reactions.

13.) There will be medical stations set up along the march route and there will be march volunteers and trained marshals to help you with anything you need. You will be ale to easily identify them. There will also be private security guards as well as police officers who will be able to help you in case of an emergency.

14.) Do not fight with other protesters in regards to their protest tactics, and know that there may be counter-protesters along the route. Do not engage with counter-protesters; this is not the time for letting emotions and tempers fly or for making smart remarks and retorts. Things can escalate very quickly in this type of circumstance and your actions could derail the meaning of the march. If someone says something offensive, ignore them and walk away from them.

15.) Stay off of people’s private property so you don’t get arrested for trespassing. Don’t litter or deface anyone’s private property. Don’t throw things. Don’t incite or participate in violence in any way.

16.) If you are stopped by the police or arrested (from the ACLU):
Stay calm, be polite, and don’t run. Don’t argue, resist, or obstruct the police, even if you are innocent or you believe that the police are violating your rights. In some states, you must give your name if asked to identify yourself, but you do not have to provide an ID or other paperwork. Make sure to keep your hands where police can see them. Point out that you are not disrupting anyone else’s activity and that the First Amendment protects your actions. Ask if you are free to leave. If the officer says yes, calmly and silently walk away.

Do not resist arrest, even if you believe the arrest is unfair. If you are under arrest, you have a right to ask why. Otherwise, say you wish to remain silent and ask for a lawyer immediately. Don’t give any explanations or excuses. Don’t say anything, sign anything, or make any decisions without a lawyer. You have the right to make a local phone call, and if you’re calling your lawyer, police are not allowed to listen.

You never have to consent to a search of yourself or your belongings. Police may “pat down” your clothing if they suspect you have a weapon, and may search you after an arrest. You should not physically resist, but you have the right to refuse consent for any further search. If you do explicitly consent, it can affect you later in court.

Remember: the street is not the place to challenge police misconduct. Don’t physically resist officers or threaten to file a complaint. As soon as you can, write down everything you remember, including officers’ badge and patrol car numbers, which agency the officers were from, and any other details. Get contact information for witnesses. If you are injured, take photographs of your injuries (but seek medical attention first). Once you have this information, you can file a written complaint with the agency’s internal affairs division or civilian complaint board; in many cases, you can file a complaint anonymously if you wish. You can also seek the assistance of an attorney or the ACLU.

More information:
17.) Women’s March website – in D.C. and sister marches across the globe
https://www.womensmarch.com/

18.) Washington Peace Center
http://washingtonpeacecenter.org/node/16203

19.) ACLU
https://www.aclu.org/know-your-rights/what-do-if-your-rights-are-violated-demonstration-or-protest

20.) Know Your Rights
https://www.facebook.com/notes/janie-mac/know-your-rights-all-protesters-a-must-read-before-you-go-on-an-action-or-protes/10151053142352064/

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In the pause: As a white person, I have not done enough for my non-white neighbors

Christa Avampato

On this day of commemoration and service, I have a confession: as a white person, I have not done enough for my non-white neighbors. Yes I have volunteered, befriended, listened, learned, and dedicated large portions of my career to help people who look different from me. As I was reading and reflecting on Dr. King’s legacy in light of the recent comments by Congressman John Lewis, I realized I must do more.

I read the full Letter from a Birmingham Jail for the first time in many years and this quote had a powerful impact on me:

“First, I must confess that over the last few years I have been gravely disappointed with the white moderate. I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro’s great stumbling block in the stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen’s Council-er or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate who is more devoted to “order” than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice; who constantly says “I agree with you in the goal you seek, but I can’t agree with your methods of direct action;” who paternalistically feels he can set the timetable for another man’s freedom; who lives by the myth of time and who constantly advises the Negro to wait until a “more convenient season”. Shallow understanding from people of goodwill is more frustrating than absolute misunderstanding from people of ill will. Lukewarm acceptance is much more bewildering than outright rejection.” ~Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

It is a letter that is sadly aligned with the situation in which we now find ourselves on the doorstep of the inauguration and the Women’s March. We can not afford to be moderates. Our only hope for justice for all people is to stay informed, speak up, rise up, and join together. We cannot be silent. We cannot sit on the sidelines. Now is the time for action, for the positive peace that Dr. King referenced so beautifully in his letter 54 years ago. And it cannot just be the oppressed who rise; it must be all of us from all walks of life, all races, creeds, and genders that stand together not waiting for a more convenient season but making today and every day our season to do what’s right. The days of lukewarm acceptance are no longer an option.

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In the pause: Celebrate your unique journey

Christa Avampato

A friend of mine is resetting his life: new job, new city, new just about everything. Though he’s excited about his adventure into the unknown, he’s also feeling uncomfortable because he’s comparing his life to the lives of others, especially to friends and acquaintances on social media.

In that moment, my friend just needed me to listen to how he was feeling. He didn’t want advice; he just needed support. He just needed to be heard and validated without feeling guilty. So I held that space for him. At the end of the conversation, I told him I was really proud of him for taking his own journey, for not letting these comparisons and fears stop him from redesigning exactly the life he wants.

My hope for him is the same hope I have for all of us—that we celebrate our own unique journeys without any judgement. Our conversations also made me even more grateful that this year I’m making more time to pause and disconnect online so that I can connect more with my own spirit and with the spirit of others in the world.

creativity

In the pause: Rain, not thunder, grows flowers

Christa Avampato

“Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.” ~Rumi

As much as 2016 was a year of hype, I hope that 2017 is a year of substance. I hope we stop rewarding the person in the room with the loudest voice and start listening to those who are take action in a thoughtful, collaborative, and inclusive way. I hope we learn to revere love and reject hate. And most of all, I hope we collectively come to understand that caring for people and assuring equality is not a liberal value, but a human one.

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Wonder: Trying to understand race in America

Christa Avampato

A good number of my closest friends are black and they have taught me so much about race over the many years we’ve been friends. Despite our very personal and open conversations, I will never know what it’s like to be black in America. Still, I try my best. I want to understand. I care deeply that all people, everywhere have equal opportunities and resources to build a happy, healthy, and productive life.

Race issues are human issues, and we all bear responsibility for them. In the past few weeks, I’ve been trying to further educate myself on the history and state of race and I found the sources below powerful and necessary. I highly recommend them to everyone regardless of your politics, race, or beliefs. As a white person, they were often difficult for me to read and hear. And then I thought of my friends, my neighbors (I live in a predominantly black neighborhood), and the black community in America, and how much they have endured and fought against for far too long. If they have the courage to live these stories, then good god the least I can do is listen and learn.

My President Was Black by Ta-Nehisi Coates

What Donald Trump Doesn’t Know About Black People by Michael Eric Dyson

Born a Crime: Stories from a South African Childhood by Trevor Noah – working my way through this and it’s wonderful!

Loving (movie) by Focus Features

The National Museum of African American History and Culture – I’m going later this week and can’t wait to share my experience with you!

The New York Times‘ Race/Related newsletter

Every Tone a Testimony – 59 tracks of voices in music, oratory, poetry, and prose by historically renowned African American musicians, writers, and activists

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Wonder: A kindness story about my dog, a handyman, and Star Wars

Christa Avampato

I have a very special gratitude story today about the power of community and kindness. Nick is one of the handy men in my apartment building. He’s always helping people out and doing odd jobs around our neighborhood, too. He and Phineas are good pals. Yesterday, Nick was outside working with no gloves in single digit temps. I bought Nick some warm gloves and Nicole, the concierge in my building, helped me get that gift to him.

Nicole said he was so surprised and touched that he started crying. She said he hopped on his bike with the gloves on and headed off to help a friend who was having car trouble. Apparently, Nick stopped into our local Petco and asked what would be a good small toy for a dachshund. The manager of the Petco asked “Are you buying a gift for Phineas? He’s our best customer!” Nick said he was and told him about the gloves I bought for him. The manager at the Petco was so happy to hear this story that he gave Nick a limited edition Star Wars dog toy of Kylo Ren to give to Phinny. They put it in a gift bag, and Nick left it with Nicole for us.

Phineas started jumping around when we opened it in the lobby, and Nicole said he and Nick had the same reaction. I learned that Nicole’s been having a really tough year and she said today made her believe in the goodness of people and the meaning of Christmas.

Doing big things that help a lot of people is a wonderful thing. And there are also dozens of small things we can do right where we are to help people in our community. Kindness and generosity are two of the greatest resources we have. Let’s use them to make the world and our own little corner of it better for others. Today I’m grateful for my community and the opportunities I have to help my neighbors.

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Wonder: The Jungle Book

Christa Avampato

“How many lives is a man-cub worth?” ~Shere Khan

After I saw it was nominated for a number of awards, I watched the live action version of The Jungle Book that was released this year. I can’t help but think about what a powerful allegory it is for our times. A community of wolves, loving and faithful to one another, protected a member of their pack, Mowgli, who was different. All they wanted was peace and acceptance for everyone. The member of their community who was different posed no threat to anyone, and yet a dictatorial tiger, Shere Khan, demanded that Mowgli be turned over to him to be destroyed. Mowgli left of his own volition for the sake of the pack, and still he was pursued by Shere Khan. On his way to the man-village where he will supposedly be protected and accepted, Mowgli makes friends who help him defeat Shere Khan.

Would we have the courage to protect someone who was different? Would we have the courage to standup for ourselves when faced with bigotry? When the moment comes to fight for what we believe in, would we back down in fear or would we rise and stand tall against injustice?

The Jungle Book is a story written for children, but its lessons have far-reaching implications for all of us. Literature is both a mirror and a teacher. It shows us what we’re made of. It gives us something to aspire to. It inspires us to become greater than we think we can be.

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Wonder: The Booth of Encouragement

Christa Avampato

Remember yesterday when I told you that you could do anything? Well, I’m cooking up a way to help you out.

In my efforts to increase the amount of time I pause and connect in the real world in the coming year, I’m thinking of setting up a Booth of Encouragement a la Lucy from the Peanuts Gang. I’ve long been inspired by Lucy matter-of-fact advice. Come on in, have a piece of homemade bread (yes, I bake bread), a warm beverage, and give Phineas a pat on the head (because a snuggle from a dachshund seriously makes everything better.) For a nickel that gets donated to charity, you tell me what you’d like to do that you think you can’t do and I’ll provide encouragement and any assistance I have to help make it possible. What if I set up something like this in your city?  Would you swing by?

It’s a crazy idea, right? But I want to give it a try. If it’s going to provide encouragement and support to even one person, it’s worth a shot. I’m going to reach out to a few people who might be able to help me do a small, live test of the idea. If you have ideas, please let me know. The world needs more encouragement and I’m prepared to give it; let’s do this.