Tag: change

creativity

Wonder: Take a chance

Christa Avampato

I love this piece in the New York Times about taking chances. The bottom line is we don’t take enough of them. We’re so likely to coast, content to be comfortable with routine even if we’re unhappy. We worry about what it would take to make a big change, even one we’ve always wanted to make. We have to toss away fear and embrace the risk of falling flat on our face, in front of everyone, and then we have to get up again and look everyone in the eye. Sends a shiver down your spine, doesn’t it?

And I say, “Do it anyway.” Go out there right now, into the world, and do exactly what you want to do. Don’t settle, don’t shrink, and don’t take the easy way out. Do what’s difficult for no other reason than because it’s what you want to do. You’ll find that everyone who really matters is cheering you on, and you will inspire them to follow their own journey of impossibility. You can do this.

creativity

Wonder: Don’t stay the same

Christa Avampato

“Longevity means we have to evolve. We have to be able to change.” ~Wolfgang Puck

In a few weeks, my latest piece for The Washington Post is going to be published. It’s an interview with a young man my age who had three strokes within a week. over our hour-long conversation, I was in awe of his strength and courage.

His final statement to me, and the final line in the piece is something that I have not been able to shake. This young man still deals with legacy issues from his strokes. He’s unable to work, he is often tired, and he has memory issues. After almost two years, his doctors told him that he may never fully recover. He may never be exactly the way he was before the strokes. Rather than feel sorry for himself, he said, “That’s okay. I don’t want to be the way I was before. I want to be better.”

His willingness to change and be changed by his experience has brought him this far. I have no doubt that he is poised to go so much further. If the ability to evolve indeed leads to longevity, then this man has a long life ahead of him.

creativity

Wonder: Embrace the beginning

Christa Avampato

No matter how excited we are about something new – a new relationship, a new city, a new home, a new job – there is some amount of anxiety that comes with the unknown. I felt that way Sunday night. I’m so excited about my new job and I was also a little nervous leading up to my first day. Rather than letting that nervousness consume me, I sat down, closed my eyes, and just focused on my breathing. Phineas crawled into my lap.

What was I so nervous about? A new routine, new people, new office? Was I afraid that I wouldn’t do a good job? Was I afraid all of that and then some? After a few minutes, I realized what was happening. I was afraid of waiting. I just wanted to begin, to roll up my sleeves and get down to making a difference. I have a hard time being patient, especially with myself. And this was good practice for me. I decided to calm down and enjoy getting to know this new job. I decided to enjoy the new, to enjoy the process of figuring it all out. Comfort will come soon enough. Now is the time to embrace being a beginner.

creativity

Wonder: Make your time matter

Christa Avampato

God willing, I’m not at mid-life yet but the truth is I’ve almost died a handful of times. On a few of those occasions, I barely scraped by. And maybe that’s why I am so driven and impatient. Maybe that’s why I abhor wasting time. Maybe that’s why I am utterly incapable of sitting down longer than 18 minutes a day to meditate. Sometimes, I think this makes me a complete lunatic. And then I read quotes like the one below from Brené Brown, and I realize that yes, I may be crazy, but there’s a method to and a reason for the madness. And it’s all okay. I’m just trying to make my life meaningful and to make my time matter.

”I think midlife is when the universe gently places her hands upon your shoulders, pulls you close, and whispers in your ear: I’m not screwing around. It’s time. All of this pretending and performing – these coping mechanisms that you’ve developed to protect yourself from feeling inadequate and getting hurt – has to go.

Your armor is preventing you from growing into your gifts. I understand that you needed these protections when you were small. I understand that you believed your armor could help you secure all of the things you needed to feel worthy of love and belonging, but you’re still searching and you’re more lost than ever.

Time is growing short. There are unexplored adventures ahead of you. You can’t live the rest of your life worried about what other people think. You were born worthy of love and belonging. Courage and daring are coursing through you. You were made to live and love with your whole heart. It’s time to show up and be seen.”

~Brené Brown

creativity

Wonder: Manifest what you need

Christa Avampato

Recently, I’ve had some pretty remarkable reminders that we can attract and create what we need. Even if it seems improbable or impossible, somehow once we decide we are ready for something to happen, the way opens. Our state of mind is especially important during difficult times, when all seems lost, when it seems that nothing we do will make things better. It’s times like these that I stop. I regroup. I let my mind and body relax. I breathe. I let go.

And then something rises up – an idea, an image, some untapped source of strength I didn’t even know was there. Just when I’m as down as I think I can be, I find myself floating back up to the surface. Life’s like that. A wave, a roller coaster, a trip with plenty of winding roads.

Maybe you’re in this cycle right now. Maybe something difficult or sad or disappointing happened. Maybe you’re worried, confused, or unsure. Close your eyes and imagine the best possible outcome. Imagine leading yourself out of your situation today and into a brighter tomorrow. Believe that it will get better and when you open your eyes, work hard to make it so. You can do this.

creativity

Wonder: A passing away

Christa Avampato

This week I was comforted, as I often am, by the words of Winnie-the-Pooh by A.A. Milne. “How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”

My family faced a sad loss on Tuesday. Our dear family friend, appropriately named Faith, passed away. At the incredible age of nearly 85, she lived a happy, fulfilling life of service.  I was lucky to know her and she remains one of the kindest people I’ve known.

She was there for all of the milestones in my childhood, the good and the difficult. Birthdays, Sunday dinners, graduations. Her smiling face was there, camera in-hand to capture it all. She was a constant source of love and support. I think of her as one of my many aunties who helped me realize what kind of life I could have if I worked hard and was good to others. She instilled in me the sense that I mattered, and what I thought and felt and did was valued and valid.

When I heard she passed away this week, I was so sad. I felt a little light go out, but it was only a blip because immediately I felt that same light reignite, brighter and warmer than ever before. I’m sad that she’s gone from this plane and I’m so glad that she crossed over to a place free of pain and discomfort. I’ll see her on the other side, eventually, a long time from now. And I am as grateful for that as I am to have known her in this lifetime. RIL – Rest in Love.

creativity

Wonder: Know thyself and be happy

Christa Avampato

“Get back in touch with self-mastery because it’s the one thing that never goes away. You’re the one person you’re stuck with forever.” ~Mark Lack

I’ve been thinking a lot about ending and change lately, not in a sad way, but just as a natural part of life and evolution. In all this change, I’ve also spent some of my time thinking about what remains constant. It seems that almost everything and everyone shifts somehow. Faith can be shaken. Our minds can be changed. Our health, and the health of everyone we know and love, ebbs and flows. Neighborhoods turn over, for better or for worse.

Then I read this quote by Mark Lack and meditated on it. In my lifetime, the beat of my heart and the constancy of my breath are the only things I will always have and know everywhere I go. And that brought me a lot of peace and happiness. All the more reason to spend some time every day quietly getting to know exactly who we are at our core.

creativity

Wonder: Settle and root

Christa Avampato

I’ve been laying low in the evenings this week and over this weekend. After so much activity with traveling, packing, and moving, I need to take some time on my own to settle and root. In yoga, our safety, security, and feeling of home base lies in our lower chakras. They are our foundation, the seat of our intuition, and they house our sense of well-being. We need them to be strong to build upon them.

Finally I am starting to feel that sense home and security. My art is slowly filling my walls, papers are being organized and put away. Even Phin, very slowly and somewhat surely, is beginning to settle into this new space and routine. (Well, at least he’s sleeping more than 3 hours a night!)

Transitions can be tough, no matter how wonderful they are. So if like me you’re going through a lot of change right now and making plans for new beginnings, give yourself a break. You aren’t going to get everything right. I certainly don’t. You’re not perfect. I’m far from it. Let yourself have the space and time to adjust. Take it a step, a moment, a day at a time. You can’t rush roots.

creativity

Wonder: Don’t be afraid to walk away

Christa Avampato

You can’t be afraid to walk away from something that’s not right for you. A city. A job. A relationship. A financial deal. A conversation. A situation. As Brian has often said to me, “if it doesn’t work, it doesn’t work.”

I’m not saying to run at the first hint of trouble; I’m just saying that our energy and time are too precious to be wasted, especially by someone else. If someone isn’t treasuring your talents and gifts, then see to it that your talents and gifts be applied elsewhere. Don’t succumb to the idea that there’s nothing better out there or that in some way you aren’t worthy, ready, or capable of something better. You are. Right now.

The people who need you are out there. Find them.

creativity

Wonder: Be always blooming

Christa Avampato

be-always-bloomingSunday was a pretty spectacular day. I did most of my must-do items on Saturday so Sunday was a day to do whatever I wanted. It warmed up into the 60s, and Phin and I took a 2+ hour walk around our neighborhood. We enjoyed the sun, the warmth, and the many people and pups who stopped us to say hello. Every restaurant had its outdoor seating open. You could see the warmth seeping into people’s faces and opening up their smiles.

It’s supposed to snow on Friday. Though I do like the chilly weather, I’m looking forward to more than a taste of spring. It will be here in just a few short weeks. For me, the seasons are just the right length here in Washington, D.C. Just when I’m ready for a change, it arrives. No matter what the season, something’s always blooming.