change, time

Step 311: An Extra Hour

Christa Avampato

“All my possessions for a moment of time.” ~ Elizabeth I

I never believed it would happen, that life would go by faster as I got older. This year has flown by for me, and the holidays are just around the corner. So many of my friends have talked recently about the passage of time, how one day falls into the next and before we know it too many days have gone before we’ve all gotten together again. I know every second of every day passes by at the exact same length as every second that came before it and everyone that will come after it.

I think times goes by more quickly once we fully realize just how fleeting it all is. When we see the lines start to creep around our eyes, when we see our parents start to grow older, and when we have to start checking the next demographic box on market surveys we realize time doesn’t have to ask for our permission to pass by and it doesn’t care about whether or not we accept it’s passing. It has a stubborn mind of its own. It will go on, with or without us.

I thought a lot about time yesterday as we got an hour of it back. The end of Daylight savings time is the one day when we get that 25th hour we so desperately crave. And you know what? It didn’t really matter that much, just like it doesn’t really matter if we have a little more money or a little more luck. We are remarkable creatures of adaption. If suddenly days shrunk to 23 hours, we’d find a way to still get everything done. We’d flex. We always do.

care, health, teaching, yoga

Step 310: Healing by Example

Christa Avampato

“The physician who knows only medicine, knows not even medicine.” It would follow that the care-taker that does not care for themselves cannot care-“fully” for others.” ~ Mark Twain

Yoga City NYC is a fantastic resource for anyone interested in yoga and wellness, two giant common interests among many New Yorkers. In their newsletter last week they published this quote by Mark Twain. It reminds me of how important it is as a teacher to not only compose a well-organized yoga class, but to practice what I teach in my daily life for my own benefit. To give care, we need to receive care, too.

For the new year, I am exploring new opportunities to teach yoga to under-served populations in unconventional spaces. Caregivers are a population I’m particularly keen on because it would help me to lever up my impact. If I can help caregivers be well, then they can take care of others more effectively. Caregivers come in many forms – doctors, nurses, teachers, coaches, mentors. They give of themselves every day, but how often does anyone give to them?

I hear a lot of people, especially moms, say that they just don’t have time to take care of themselves because they’re too busy taking care of everyone else. The truth is that taking care of themselves is the best way that they can care for others. We can’t give from a deficit – the math just doesn’t work that way. So if we really want to heal and care for others, we need to heal ourselves first. And there’s not a single selfish thing about self-care; it’s actually the most generous thing we can do. What we give is rooted in what we have.

Uncategorized

Step 309: A Review of Kitchen Confidential by Anthony Bourdain

Christa Avampato

“I’m going for it. You only go around once.” ~ Anthony Bourdain

I’m a phenomenal eater and dinner guest. I always bring a gift, I will wash dishes, and the only thing I don’t eat is mayonnaise. I remember starting college at Penn in West Philadelphia, a very ethnically diverse neighborhood, and realizing just how many kinds of food there were in the world. Ethiopian, Indian, Vietnamese, Korean. I learned that although Spaniards, Peruvians, and Venezuelans all spoke the same language, their food was vastly different and was decidedly not the Tex-Mex I once associated with all Latin cooking. Philadelphia was my introduction to the world of food.

History was one of my majors at Penn, and I love food history. I love cookbooks that read like adventure stories and convery the cultural understanding and insights that are wrapped up in food from a specific country. You can learn a lot about people by what they cook and eat. I started reading Kitchen Confidential: Adventures in the Culinary Underbelly, the journey of Anthony Bourdain’s mad ride from lowly summer dishwasher to Executive Chef at Brasserie Les Halles, one of the top restaurants in New York, and am entranced by his storytelling.

I had a brief and unremarkable career in the restaurant business, composed of:
1.) 2 weeks as a server at the Rocking Horse Ranch when I was in high school. I was terrible.

2.) A summer as a cocktail waitress at a local bar in my hometown. I was also terrible. I didn’t drink then, and therefore didn’t know what any drinks were when people ordered them.

3.) A summer hostessing job at the Ground Round. This I was pretty good at because all I had to do was smile and say “right this way”.

4.) A barista at several coffee shops through college and during my early career. I was actually a decent barista, even though I didn’t drink coffee then. (Now I drink it every day and realize I missed out on this pleasure for far too long.) It kind of felt like I was inventing every drink I made, and I loved the scent of coffee and the baked goods that went along with it. That counter between me and the customers made it far less stressful than being a waitress.

5.) After I left theatre, I worked in a restaurant for about 2 weeks as a waitress – I sadly realized I had gotten even worse at this skill as I got older. So I threw in the towel on any possibility of taking up a career associated with a kitchen and have never looked back.

Kitchen Confidential made me realize why people take up careers slaving over a hot stove, torturing themselves with long, irregular hours, and working their way up a very long, unforgiving chain. There’s nothing glamorous or sexy about life in a kitchen. What food does offer is a pathway into the hearts, minds, and souls of others. It can heal, nurture, and teach. It brings people together, fosters friendship, and sparks love. Food is at the heart of so many cherished memories. It can transport us.

I don’t think my career will ever take a turn back into the food business, but I certainly have a new-found respect and admiration for the art of cooking and serving thanks to Bourdain’s brutally honest culinary tales. Chefs are societal heroes. Do yourself a favor and take the trip down memory lane with him. It’s well worth the time.

(Warning – this book contains some pretty crude language, which I find fabulous because it’s wrapped in unbelievably good storytelling. I marvel at the power of a well-placed profanity because I have no idea how to use them in writing, mostly because I don’t use them very often in my every day life. I have a feeling Bourdain spends a good deal of his day practicing the use of curse words so he’s a master at it. It’s not everyone’s cup of tea, so I wanted to provide a word of caution. Cheers!)

government, hope, politics

Step 308: A Letter to President Obama

Christa Avampato

Dear President Obama,

While last night’s election results may seem like a referendum on the policies you’ve advocated for over the last two years, I think they are a greater reflection of the fear that so many people feel about this new economic level setting. It can be tempting to voters to think a change of power will bring a change of scene. People want the good ol’ times again, or at least what we thought were good ol’ times.

I graduated from the Darden business school in May 2007 into what my classmates and I thought was an unstoppable economy. 6 months later it was all-to-clear to us that we had built our short-term career aspirations on a tremendously unstable house of cards. We had to rethink those dreams, at least in the short-term. Maybe even delay them a bit or alter them.

But our underlying confidence in our abilities to make positive contributions to the world around us did not waver, and your confidence shouldn’t either. We needed you to take up the seemingly insurmountable challenge of the Presidency two years ago, and we need you now more than ever.

Change worth having takes time to build. There are a lot of people in this country who haven’t lost heart. I haven’t, and I hope you don’t either.

Uncategorized

Step 307: Gratitude for Ordinary Moments

Christa Avampato

“Do not wait for extraordinary circumstances to do good action; try to use ordinary situations.” ~ Jean Paul Richter

On Sunday morning, Phin and I were taking a walk in Central Park. It was so beautiful outside, one of those picture-perfect New York Fall mornings that confirm my belief that New York is my home. We wondered for several hours enjoying the foliage, the soft wind, and the sunshine. A little girl who is ordinarily afraid of dogs thought Phin was so cute that she put aside her fear and gave him a pat on the head. “This is huge for her. Thank you so much,” her mom said to me. I was glad we could help. We then walked under the footbridge that leads to the Met, and as we emerged on the other side I was unexpectedly overwhelmed by a sense of happiness and peace. Everything in that one moment was just perfect.

I’m nearly finished with writing a post a day that focuses on extraordinary living. I have seen, experienced, and learned so much on this journey. It has been a year filled with surprises, some happy, some sad, and all worthwhile. The most surprising discovery has just recently started to make itself known to me – that extraordinary living doesn’t really have anything to do with exotic vacations, a fancy job, the amount of money or prestige we have, or how well-received our ideas are by others. It has much more to do with finding extraordinary joy in very ordinary moments – taking a walk with my dog, cooking a meal, commuting to work, and having coffee with a friend. If we can find happiness in those everyday moments, then there’s nothing that can impede an extraordinary, well-lived life.

The photo above depicts Central Park during the height of Fall. It was taken by BrownRice.

books, election, government, politics, vote

Step 306: Review of More Davids Than Goliaths by Harold Ford, Jr.

Christa Avampato

I saw Harold Ford speak at a Hudson Union Society last month. His talk prompted me to get his book More Davids Than Goliaths: A Political Education. Mr. Ford comes from a political family, and has spent the majority of his career in public service. In the past few years he has held positions in the private sector, and interesting and educational detour from his life in elected office.

It was especially interesting to read about his history. We went both went to Penn, and his stories about his undergraduate life held a special place in my heart because I understood the backdrop and context. My mom has my siblings and I volunteering on political campaigns as far back as I can remember. This was true for Mr. Ford as well. He’s passionate about education and health care, issues that are at the top of my list when I consider how I’ll vote during an election.

Some of his insights were new learnings for me. Though I’ve volunteered on political campaigns, I have never managed one or developed a campaign strategy. I’ll admit that prior to Mr. Ford’s book I never really understood how or why certain decisions are made on political campaigns. The routes traveled by candidates and the messages they deliver along those routes are so carefully plotted. His book tells his own personal history and bids for office; it also serves as a primer for understanding national political campaigns on a very detailed level.

What struck me the most throughout the book is how hard he worked for his offices, the ones he won and the ones he lost. The effort he exerted never wavered. He was relentless in his efforts, and all he asked in return was to be heard honestly and fairly. And he did sincerely ask for every vote he received. Through his words I have a new-found respect for anyone who runs for office. Putting yourself out there and withstanding judgment is an uncomfortable thing to do but it’s the only way to make societal progress on a broad scale.

Despite his loss in Tennessee’s Senate race, I hope he doesn’t give up. He has a long run way in politics ahead of him and our country needs political leaders with his integrity and charisma. Our future depends on them.

Today is election day, please cast your vote. Not sure where your polling station is? Click here.

writing

I’m featured today on ZENyc

Christa Avampato

My friend, Amanda, write ZENyc, a blog that’s both beautiful and helpful to New Yorkers looking for a little more peace in their hectic lives. This morning I have a post featured on ZENyc about the joys of being a beginner. Check it out here.

goals

Step 305: October Accomplishments and November Goals

Christa Avampato

My favorite time of year begins with Halloween and runs straight through the new year. It always goes by too fast, and long after it’s over I find myself looking back on this time of the year as magical and transformative. As this year of consciously living an extraordinary life draws to a close, I’m grateful for the awareness that this journey brought to my daily living. I’ve loved the reading the comments and emails I received as I made a daily step forward. They kept me going and reminded me of why I hit the “publish” button every day.

October Accomplishments:
1.) Continue work on Innovation Station content and action plan.

I had several fruitful conversations this month that introduced me to potential partners for a pilot. These conversations were encouraging, and helped me see how important this program could be to the students who participate in it. Setting up a pilot is moving slower than I’d like, but I know how important it is to find the right partner for this project. There’s a lot at stake with this pilot, and I have a clear vision of how I want it to unfold. It’s important to find a partner school whose supportive of and enhances that vision.

2.) Spend some quality time with my new pup, Phineas. I adopted him unexpectedly in September, which was a huge surprise goal that has brought so much richness to my life in a very short time. This month I’ll take him in for an evaluation to become a therapy dog. I’d love to get us into the Reading to Dogs program.

Phineas is a much younger dog than I thought he was when I first adopted him. He’ll need to grow out of puppyhood before he’s ready to be a therapy dog. I am surprised by how quickly we’ve bonded and how easily I made room for him in my life. This little guy is teaching me a lot about love and resilience and compassion. He’s making me a better human being.

3.) Continue working on yoga and personal finance book. Now that I’ve got a loose structure in place, I can start to fill it in with the fun stuff.

This has been a gratifying and productive month for the book. I’ve been getting lots of encouragement and gathering resources to fill in the lines I’ve drawn. It’s becoming clearer and clearer to me how much this book is needed.

November Goals:

1.) Fully embrace the holidays. This is the first holiday season since 2006 that I’m not attached to a retail business. I love retail but it makes a mess of the holidays with its rapid pace. This year will be the most relaxed holiday season I’ve had in a long time and I plan to take full advantage of it.

2.) Planning, planning, and more planning. Because the holidays can be busy times, movement on projects that require outside input can be challenging. People are away on vacation and pre-occupied with tasks like holiday shopping. As a result, I’ll be using this holiday season to plan for post-holiday action.

Start decking the halls, light a few candles, and make time friends and family. We need every shred of holiday spirit we can get!

meditation, time, wellness, yoga

Step 304: Souls and Grocery Stores

Christa Avampato

“What is a soul? It’s like electricity – we don’t really know what it is, but it’s a force that can light a room.” ~ Ray Charles

It’s easier to know the soul of others than it is to know our own. We can look at other people’s actions, the people they surround themselves with, and the issues that ignite their energy and understand where their souls are rooted. The difficulty of knowing our own souls is akin to being able to rise up above our lives and observe from an outsider perspective. It is tough work.

We can, and often do, run through life. We fill up our schedules, load up our to-do lists, and dart from place to place, hoping that somewhere along the way we’ll find the path we’re supposed to be on. What I’m finding in my meditation practice is that the only way to know our souls, our light, is to sit still, close the eyes, and breath. We won’t find our souls, our purpose, out there. We will gather ideas from the world, options, and possibilities. But the only way to know which path is the right one for us is to look around inside. If we’re looking inside and moving about, chances are we’ll get a blurry image just like a camera gets when it’s shaken while snapping a photo. The image becomes clear in the stillness.

I will be the first to admit that I hate to sit still. I run through all the things I should be doing, rather than just sitting there. I feel like I’m losing time. And then I think about the grocery store. If I sit down and make a list of what I need to get, my trip is faster and more efficient. If I just run out the door without a list, I find I wander around the store for far too long, all because taking the time to make a list felt like time wasted. The journey to know our souls is the same as our journey around Whole Foods. Take some time to be still and collect our thoughts, and it becomes an easier process to get where and what we want. Below is my favorite meditation, the one that actually expands the time in my day and the knowledge of who I am and who I mean to be.

My favorite still meditation:
Sit in a comfortable cross-legged position
Deepen the breath
Lengthen the spine
Imagine with each inhale we grow a little taller and with each exhale we grow a little wider
Relax the face and jaw
Smile slightly and envision a tiny light right in the middle of the chest that gets a little brighter with every breath cycle. It’s that small light that will reveal our souls as it strengthens

The photo above can be found here.

creativity, holiday, imagination

Step 303: Our Chance to Be Someone Else

Christa Avampato

I love Halloween, mostly for the candy but also for the chance to take on another persona. For one night it’s perfectly acceptable, and expected, that we take a giant leap outside of the ordinary. So maybe it’s not the dream of your life to be Lady Gaga, but for one night at a party it’s fun to think about.

Halloween asks us to stoke the fires of imagination and humor, to get creative and bust out of our day-to-day routine. We’re willing to see and enjoy the ridiculous, the clever, and the well put-together, and encouraging of others to do the same. The fun is allowed to grow and multiply with every new costume we see, whether we know the person wearing it or not. I always find that Halloween makes us friendlier. Somehow those costumes give us permission to laugh at ourselves and with others.

We all need a break from ourselves from time to time. Let the trick-or-treating commence and enjoy the holiday that lets us literally walk in the shoes of someone else. Happy Halloween!