Category: commitment

change, commitment, determination, work, yoga

Leap: There is Always a Path of Less Resistance

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest

Have you ever felt like you’re drowning in tiny tasks that somehow grew out-of-control overnight?

That’s how I recently felt with Compass Yoga teacher scheduling. Almost a year ago, I started to get requests from more library branches that wanted a regular yoga class in their programming. They had heard about the wonderful classes at the Bloomingdale Branch and once the word spread to one branch, many others piled on.

Of course, I was thrilled by the requests and wanted to fill them all. At the time, I thought the best idea was to find a lot of teachers who would be willing to teach these free classes to get experience. In New York City, there is no shortage of new teachers who need and want experience. So that people wouldn’t feel too overwhelmed by a regular weekly class, I decided to put together rotating rosters of teachers who would share the load at each branch. I also thought this would give the students a variety of teaching styles to keep them engaged in the practice.

These are really nice ideas and they kind of worked, but I completely underestimated the challenges. First, I did a very good job of driving myself crazy as I coordinated the schedules of 17 (!) teachers and then often hunted for last-minute subs. Second, teachers wanted to feel more connected with the students on a regular basis and having a regular weekly class helped them schedule their own lives more efficiently. Third, students wanted to get to know a teacher better rather than seeing 3 or 4 different teachers per month.

I was well aware of the first challenge but didn’t know about the other two. As a result, I began to wonder if we’d have to scale back the library program altogether in an effort to restore my sanity. I wrestled with this idea for weeks, changing my mind every other day. Then a really interesting idea surfaced once I found out about the second and third challenges described above: each branch of the library could have a lead teacher. That teacher may not be able to teach every week and may need to sub out occasionally, but the relative consistency would help me tremendously and would be more helpful to the teachers and students.

In the end, we didn’t need to scale back the library program. We just needed to find a smarter way to manage it. And now with this simpler teacher scheduling structure, we can grow to more branches to help more people. Every challenge has a solution and many times it’s far simpler than we realize. Once we have the will to make something happen (or change), the way opens.

adventure, choices, commitment, community, creativity, dreams

Leap: Go Out on the Edge

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest

“You’re not going to have a lot of people you can talk to about this. There is never a crowd on the leading edge.” ~ Abraham Hicks

My friend, Trish, had this quote on her Facebook wall last week and it captures a truth that can be tough for us to hear. Opportunity is glaring at us and growing bigger by the moment. We want to believe that everyone can see what we see and when they don’t we get frustrated, discouraged, and uncomfortable in our own skin. We begin to doubt our own abilities.

Don’t despair. Out on the Edge there is something beautiful and miraculous waiting for you – your kindred spirits. They are a small but mighty crew. They think like you think, believe what you believe, and understand what you understand. They will inspire, encourage, and support you. You are all in the same boat, paddling around looking for each other, and you’ll come together out on the Edge. It is better out there than where you are now. This time, the grass really is greener elsewhere.

But here’s the trick of it: you have to go out there. This is one of the few things that you can’t do virtually. You have to go there fully – mind, body, and soul. The only way to realize the gift of the Edge is to be there. And to make the journey you will have to trust your gut more than you trust the opinions of those around you.

Commit to the Edge and the Edge will commit to you. Now start paddling.

commitment, courage, determination, fear, meditation

Leap: Meditation Teaches Us About Fear and Perseverance

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest

“It’s okay to have emotions. Just make sure they don’t have you.” ~ Sarah Platt-Finger, ISHTA Yoga Senior Teacher

So, it happened. Over the past month since I gave notice at my corporate job and took the leap into working for myself, I have been amazed by how little fear has risen to the surface. Actually, it hasn’t risen up at all. Yesterday while in my meditation in my training class, it surprised me as it rose up and expressed itself with a sound akin to “Ah!”And then it passed away just as quickly, and as surprisingly, as it rose up.

The moment and its lessons were not lost on me. In that one second, I learned a lot about fear and perseverance:

1.) Fear is like an air bubble. It wants to be recognized and have a chance to express itself. The more we resist it and deny it, the larger that bubble becomes. If we can get ourselves into a neutral state (I recommend meditation to help with this), then the bubble can rise up to the surface and dissipate. Let fear come, but then let it go.

2.) Fear is like quicksand. If we begin to flail around in quicksand, it will swallow us whole. Remain still and we float to shore. The same is true for fear. When it comes upon us, we may feel the need “to do.” And by that I mean we may feel the need to do anything because we feel that doing anything is much better than doing nothing. It’s hard to be afraid and stay still, but that’s exactly what is needed if we want to find our way to the other side of fear, which is freedom.

3.) We have all the tools we need to banish fear. This is the most amazing insight that came from my panic moment. My meditation allowed the fear to surface and ask me, “Hey, are you sure you know what you’re doing?” In the stillness that the meditation induced in my mind and body, the answer clearly and quickly rose up – “Yes.” And in an instant the fear faded. It got the answer it needed.

This is the brilliance of meditation: it lets us face our fears but also gives us the tools to effectively and efficiently release them. We let go of fear (and every other thing that no longer serves us) because we ourselves let go. For a few moments every day, we stop doing and in those moments we feel the deep strength and wisdom that we always carry within us. Tap into that, and we find that we already have every answer to every challenge we will ever face. Go in and we find that it is this inner strength that allows us to rise.

calm, commitment, community service, kindness, time

Leap: The Dalai Lama’s Rules of the Road

Christa Avampato

I need to post this up in my apartment, particularly as I begin this new chapter of my life that involves great risk in an effort to achieve a life of my own design. Words to live by.

The Dalai Lama’s 18 Rules For Living

1. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
2. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.
3. Follow the three Rs: -Respect for self -Respect for others -Responsibility for all your actions.
4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.
6. Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
7. When you realize you have made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
8. Spend some time alone every day.
9. Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.
10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
11. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.
12. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.
13. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.
14. Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality.
15. Be gentle with the earth.
16. Once a year, go someplace you have never been before.
17. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
18. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

commitment, courage

Leap: Committment Changes Everything

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest member http://pinterest.com/charlizegrl/

Now that I’m on the other side of my decision to leap, I’m recognizing what my former boss and mentor, Bob G., coined as the “commitment effect.” He is a big Goethe fan and if there’s one lesson that he taught me in the time I worked for him it’s this: “the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too.” In other words, commit and the way forward opens up. And once you’re committed to change, it becomes impossible to stay on the same track.

Commitment breeds magic. It can’t be intellectualized. It isn’t logical. It’s not even explainable. It just happens. We are the catalyst of our own process of change. Until we commit, we can’t expect the Universe to do a damn thing for us. We have to be the driver; the Universe has to know we mean business and that we’re serious about change before it will put its energy into us.

This isn’t easy. I know it takes a great deal of faith and guts to believe this and live it. The lead up is terrifying. When we back up and stare into that moment just before we take our running start toward the cliff, our heart is beating, our blood is pumping, and doubt still has the chance to creep in. We can still turn back, and many times we do. We step out of the starting blocks and take a long hard look at the insane journey we’re about to take.

Our anticipation of the leap is much scarier than the leap itself. Our minds have this wonderful ability to invent horrific scenarios. Turn the mind off and crank up the wisdom that’s planted deep inside. That’s where the truth lies.

You know what you need to do; take your mark, get set, and go.  Your commitment will carry you.

adventure, change, choices, commitment, courage, creativity, passion

Leap: Stop Buying Ice and Start Living

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest member http://pinterest.com/denizyildiz/

I recently had a small group of people over to my house. As I was drafting up my grocery / to-do list, I wrote down “buy ice.” And then I started laughing. I have a freezer. I have ice cube trays. Did I really need to buy ice? No – I had everything I needed. I just had to take the time to fill the trays with water a few times and then crack the ice into a bowl.

We play this game with ourselves all the time. We put off doing what we really want to do because we need more – more training, more money, more contacts, more experience, more time. We have enough. We are enough. We have everything we need to get going right now. Sure, it’s scary. It’s a risk to let go of the familiar, to go off the well-planned, well-worn path. But that’s all it is – scary. It’s not impossible and we’re not incapable in any way. It’s going to take work but we can make it happen.

So many people have stories of a breaking point – an illness, a loss, a tragedy – that awakened them to the passion of their lives. I certainly do. All of a sudden we realize in a very real, non-negotiable way that our lives are finite, that we only get one time around in this form, and that it’s our obligation and deep responsibility to make the most of it.

Don’t wait for the breaking point. Breathe in and breathe out. The anticipation of leaping is much scarier than the leap itself. So gather up your courage and know that whatever you need to get your dreams to take flight, you already have. “Sometimes you just have to take a leap and build your wings on the way down.” (Kobi Yamada)

art, career, commitment, determination, passion, theatre

Beginning: My Only Talent Is My Tenaciousness

Christa Avampato
Paul Newman, the man who never stopped trying

“Acting doesn’t come natural to me. I’m very cerebral about it, unlike Joanne (Woodward), who is an intuitive actor. Acting to me is like dredging a river. It’s a painful experience. I simply do not have the intuitive talent. I worry about acting and constantly complain to myself about my own performance…and this doesn’t fall into the area of self-deprecation. I don’t know the things I have a gift for except tenaciousness…I never felt I had any gift at all to perform but it was something that I wanted badly enough so I kept after it.” ~ Paul Newman, Inside the Actor’s Studio

I had lunch with my dear friend, Trevin, yesterday. Eventually, he will be the Editor of The New York Times Theatre section because he knows just about every historical fact there is to know about the theatre. He tipped me off to the first episode of Inside the Actors Studio, on which Paul Newman was a guest. I found the episode in its entirety on YouTube and for the first time, I heard someone articulate how I feel about my own career and craft. My only real gift is tenaciousness. And I finally stopped feeling badly about that because I’m in good company with Paul Newman.

If I want something badly enough, I will figure out how to make it happen. It was true through all of my schooling, in every job I’ve ever had, in my writing, teaching, and business work. None of it came naturally or easily but I wanted my successes so much that I just refused to give up. And as Babe Ruth famously said, “It’s hard to beat a person who never gives up.” (Incidentally, this is incredibly true for yoga instructors as I wrote about on a post back in May.) I’ve never understood the idea that we should take the road of least resistance. All of the roads before me, if they were even built at all, were riddled with obstacles and resistance. I just decided to get around, over, under, and through them with every tool I could find.

I also tried very hard for my failures. I’ve failed at a good many things in my life, but it was never for lack of trying. Only a lack of truly wanting. I eventually failed at those things because I simply didn’t want to keep trying to get better at them. I found that they just weren’t worth all of the effort I would need to extend to make them happen. I moved on.

People have asked me if this year of beginnings has been frightening or discouraging to me. After all, I purposely put myself in the beginners seat and as if that weren’t enough, I shared all of it every day here on my blog for the entire world to read and judge (if they chose to.) For some I guess this process would have been frightening. For me, it was a year filled with days like all the days of my life.

I started each morning of this year exactly the same way as I’ve started every morning of my life – as someone who had to try very hard at every moment to make my life work the way I wanted it to work. Some days I was successful and some days I failed miserably. When each day was done and I put myself to bed, I was grateful for every single one no matter the outcome.

I am a perpetual beginner: always curious, never satisfied, and in constant search of my edge and my limitations. I guess you could say I’m a professional beginner because it’s the only thing I’ve ever really been. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

change, choices, commitment, creativity, faith

Beginning: Taking a Chance Leads to More Chances

Christa Avampato
From missrosemariewoods.buzznet.com

“Chances multiply if you grab them.” ~ Yogi tea bag

We too often think that this is our one big chance to try something new, to do something we’ve always dreamed of. We fear that if we don’t take this leap now, the opportunity will pass us by and if we leap and fail, then we’ll head back to our existence prior to the leap with the comfort that at least we tried. No one really talks about the second chance, the one that happens precisely because we took that first chance.

Our existence in this moment, exactly as it is, is one-of-a-kind. We will never pass this way again. Robert Frost so beautifully described this sentiment of choices and the magic that they create in his poem The Road Not Taken: “Oh, I kept the first for another day! Yet knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back.” Once we make a leap, it begets another leap. The chances we take lead to other chances, not back to the place we started.

Perhaps this is the reason why leaping is so frightening in the first place. If we knew we could always just go back to our jumping off point, then we’d leap all the time without even considering the consequences. There would be no risk. And probably no fun, either.

Consider a time you made a real leap of faith that didn’t work out as you planned. When I went to business school, I intended to return to the nonprofit world as a fundraiser. It didn’t really happen as I planned. The chances that appeared after I took that chance to go to school multiplied exponentially, expanding my view of the world and my place in it. In the nearly 5 years since I graduated, I realized that I hadn’t gone to school to return an established nonprofit. I went to school to figure out how to create my own nonprofit. While a student, I didn’t know that but somehow the Universe had a far greater intelligence on that front than I did. Way got on to way, as it were, despite my efforts to steer my path otherwise.

It’s what Goethe meant when he talked about the magic in commitment. Part of that magic comes from taking chances, knowing that more chances lie ahead that will be able to trace a direct line back to that first chance we had the courage to take. I don’t believe that on every side of a chance there will be a net to catch us, but I do believe that opportunity taken leads to more opportunities available. And that is as good a reason as any to leap.

commitment, dreams, inspiration, music, television

Beginning: Decide to Marry the Night

Christa Avampato
Lady Gaga performing "Marry the Night" on A Very Gaga Thanksgiving

“What you can do, or dream you can do, begin it! / Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.” ~ Goethe

Late on Thanksgiving night everyone had gone home and my parents were fast asleep. Phineas was cuddled up next to me snoozing, and I was pecking away on my laptop to draft a freelance writing piece. When I write, I usually have music or the TV on in the background. I flipped through the channels and saw that A Very Gaga Thanksgiving, Lady Gaga’s Thanksgiving special, was on. “Perfect,” I thought. “I love her empowering music and I won’t get distracted by a complicated storyline.”

So much for that idea.

I found Lady Gaga’s story incredibly compelling – her sense of family, the incredibly personal and unique inspirations behind each of her songs, and how she views real wealth. And there was one message in her interview at the end of the show that really stuck with me. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. Her song “Marry the Night”, her favorite song on her new album Born This Way, is about the decision she made a few years ago to fully commit to her work. Lady Gaga decided she was “going to tear it up”, make her work her husband, and never look back. “Marry the Night” is the musical manifestation of that promise to her herself.

Inspiration will find us in the most surprising ways – a unintended conversation, an chance meeting, a Lady Gaga TV special. Eventually, we will find that we can’t fight our purpose forever. During my vacation last week, the signs of a new life taking shape were abundant and abundantly clear. There was no mistaking them.

I need to commit to the work of my life – my teaching through Compass Yoga and to my writing. On Thanksgiving night, a switch flipped. The fear of this leap didn’t disappear, but it somehow became inconsequential. It now feels like there is a greater force moving me forward, a gentle hand at my back, as if the night may have chosen to marry me and I must go along.

Thanks, Lady Gaga. I needed the push.

commitment, courage, creativity, time, vision

Beginning: Kick the Perfection Addiction

Christa Avampato

“The important work of moving the world forward does not wait to be done by perfect men.” ~ George Eliot, British writer

Yesterday’s post was a call to action and it caused me to think about all of the things that may prevent us from acting, from getting our creative ideas out into the world. We’re afraid of criticism, we’re afraid we don’t know enough, and we’re afraid that our ideas just aren’t good enough. I don’t think that fear is the main reason we fail to act. I think it’s our addiction to perfection. I get this need on a very serious level. I used to pride myself on my perfection. I gleaned most of my self-worth from it, and in the process I wasted a lot of time. And time is more valuable than perfection.

Our addiction is well-justified: we are highly protective of our intellectual property (with good reason) and we want to find our groove before we offer the big reveal. But here’s the rub: we find our groove by acting on our ideas and collaborating with others. We can’t find our way by sitting on our couch. We have to get out into the world and try our ideas on for size as we let others do the same. Perfection stands in stark contrast to that truth. Perfection leaves us sitting on the couch.

Get out the chisel and break yourself free of the need to be perfect because it’s not a need at all. It’s a perception, a legacy system that needs to be left behind if we are going to progress. Thank that tiny voice of perfection for its input, turn the volume all the way down, and get your creative work done. The world needs you just as you are – perfection not required.