Category: California

adventure, California

Beautiful: I’m Going For It

Christa Avampato

Let the adventures begin. California, here I come! c8559df77db82f140b70d7973800a93c

California, dreams

Beautiful: My Vision Board for My Summer in Santa Monica

Christa Avampato

Here’s a snapshot of what I want from my summer in Santa Monica.

One Fine Yogi Tees

California, fear, health, meditation, teaching, yoga

Beautiful: How Meditation Helped Me Through a Bout of PTSD Triggered By the Santa Monica Shooting

Christa Avampato
Crowds on June 10, 2013, make their way to a campus memorial for the five killed in a shooting rampage on June 7 at Santa Monica College. The gunman was also killed. (Andy Holzman/Los Angeles Daily News)

I thought I was through with it. I don’t panic anymore when I hear fire engine sirens. I’m not afraid to be in my home. My nightmares have disappeared. I don’t end up crying on the street wondering how I got there after forgetting where I’m going. These were all symptoms I had after my apartment building fire almost 4 years ago. At the time, I didn’t know what was wrong with me. I just felt crazy. Then after I started going to therapy shortly after the fire, I realized I had PTSD.

Brian, my wizard of a therapist, and I worked through decades of issues that my PTSD triggered and after almost 3 years of hard work, I found my way to stability and confidence. That was a year ago. Last week the Santa Monica shootings sent me into a spell. I’ll be staying near there all summer on a house swap. How could this be happening to me? I felt dizzy with the what if scenarios. What if I had been there already? What if I was driving and I had been the car that was hijacked? What if I was out walking Phineas and I had been hit by a stray bullet? What if. What if. What if. I started crying. And shaking.

I used my tools. I closed by eyes, placed one hand on the heart, one hand on the belly, and started to breathe. Body into the hands on the inhale. Body into the back of the chair on the exhale. I kept my attention at the third eye. I replaced those racing what ifs with this truth: “You are safe.” I began to wind down, slowly and with a lot of effort. It worked. I was safe, and then I felt safe.

This is what meditation can do for you. It can take you from panic to peace. I can take also take you from helpless to helpful. After I calmed down, I had the most incredible thought. What happened in Santa Monica is awful. There are people there who might be scared, people who might need the gift I have to give. Maybe there’s a way for me to teach what I know. After all, I’ve lived with those what if thoughts for a long time. I learned how to chase them away. I learned how to have power over them rather than the other way around. Maybe the people of Santa Monica need that gift, too. Maybe this summer I will be in just the right place at just the right time for people who need me.

California, writing

Beautiful: New York – California House Swap This Summer

Christa Avampato
This view would be just fine.
This view would be just fine.

I have always thought that if my family got off the boat and kept going west that I would have never left the state of California. I’ve almost moved there 3 times and this summer I’d like to give life on the left coast a try by doing a house swap. Location independence is one of the great benefits of a freelance life and I want to take full advantage of it. A beach, the ocean air, salt water, and plenty of sun will be good for my soul and a couple of writing projects I’d like to finish.

Know a Californian who might want a cute apartment in New York City for the summer? Send ’em my way!

California, hope, HopeLab, Stanford

My Year of Hopefulness – Stanford

Christa Avampato

I’m finding it hard to leave California this evening, which is odd since I am heading back home to New York. Usually I am rushing to get back home after a trip. To sleep in my own bed, to be among my things, to get back to life as usual. Today I walked through some kind of door, and was consciously aware of a shift taking place. Today life changed, though I’m not yet sure how.

I ventured out to California on Saturday in preparation for meetings with HopeLab today. (More on that in a future post.) They are an exceptionally talented, passionate group of people who create brilliant product. It is a rare combination, especially in these times. Their excitement and commitment are infectious.I left their offices feeling lighter, feeling like I had picked up on some kind of trail that I had been looking for – like Trusty in Lady and the Tramp.

After the meetings with the HopeLab team, I went to Stanford to hear a presentation on talent management and recruitment for start-ups, particularly those with a global footprint. I felt completely at ease here in Palo Alto, on the Stanford campus, even though I’ve never been here before this weekend. Every part of me feels energized and hopeful, even on a day when the Dow plunged to 1997 lows and the outlook back East is as grim as ever. Here in Silicon Valley the sentiment is one of opportunity and the direction of focus is forward.

As I crossed the main quad of Stanford’s campus and meandered through its terra cotta buildings, I felt a very peaceful feeling wash over me that I have been missing for some time now. I peeked into a few classrooms that were conducting late night classes and for a second I felt a twinge of jealousy. I wanted to be one of those students, at least right at that moment. My friend, Janet, teases me that I am addicted to school and she’s not wrong. I am addicted to learning and learning environments. I do miss being a student, more than I realized I would.

Today I felt luck following me around all day, I felt a strong and gentle hand at my shoulder just pointing the way I needed to go. That sounds foolish and more than a little naive, I know, but it’s honest. As I was driving to HopeLab, a huge rainbow appeared over the freeway. And in my fortune cookie tonight I got the message, “You will soon gain something you have always wanted.” On occasion, I believe in astrology – mostly when I agree with its advice. I suppose a fortune cookie and a rainbow have just as much chance of being accurate as a horoscope. Or at least I hope they are, and in the times we’re living in hope is a precious resource.

The photo above can be found at: http://farm1.static.flickr.com/56/132248453_b7df81e3f6.jpg

California, environment, hope, nature

My Year of Hopefulness – Monterey Bay Aquarium

Christa Avampato

I make a habit of visiting baseball parks and aquariums across the country. When I used to manage theatre tours, I would make a point of seeing as many stadiums and aquariums as I could in the different cities we traveled to. I have to say that Baltimore is tough to beat in both of those departments – I saw Shark Week at that aquarium and those hotdogs at Camden Yards are the best I’ve ever had.

Being in Northern California this weekend, I wanted to see the Monterey Bay Aquarium. I have heard about it since my fundraising days at Conservation International. Monterey – you’re no Baltimore or Atlanta, though I learned some fascinating things while I was there this morning. They had a few octopi that I were entrancing. Did you know that octopi change their color according to the color of the surface they are crawling or resting on? Incredible. In Boston, they had an octopus who was bored in his own tank, so he found a way to sneak out of his tank at night, when everyone had go home, and would make his way to the lobster, eat his fill, and then get back home before the first staff members arrive. They only way they caught him was by video camera.

The jellyfish exhibit left me breathless. They had these gorgeous, bright orange jellyfish in front of a brilliant blue background. I could have stood there for hours to watch them float through their environment. It was a reminder to me that there are so many mysteries left in this world. There’s still so much more to explore, to see, and to know. We haven’t even scratched the surface – there are entire worlds underwater, canyons deeper and wider than the Grand Canyon, mountains taller than Everest. It is too much to fathom – we couldn’t possibly take it all in

70% of our planet is covered by water so if you ever feel life is too much for you to bear on dry land, I encourage you to go under the sea. Or at least get to your nearest aquarium. It will give you hope by showing you what’s possible.

The photo above can be found at: http://justinsomnia.org/images/monterey-aquarium-orange-jellyfish.jpg

California, creativity, hope, Stanford

My Year of Hopefulness – California

Christa Avampato

I’m in the Bay Area of California this weekend. I am thrilled to be meeting the fine team at HopeLab on Monday morning. Since I haven’t been to Northern California in a while I figured I would make a weekend of it. I wish I could explain my fascination with California. I’ve nearly moved here 4 times in my life. Every time I land at SFO I get this strange feeling that I’ve arrived home, even though I have no idea what it’s like to live here.

It’s a testament to the design of this area that I have yet to make one wrong turn, or get completely lost. My sense of direction is awful – for the 18 months I lived in Central Florida I was lost almost every day. The state of New Jersey still has me completely confused and I’ve spent many an hour going around in circle in D.C., trapped in or out of the city by that Beltway. Here in California, I always know where to like, just like I do in New York.

The grass is green here, there are flowers and rolling hills. I drove through Stanford, stunned by Palm Drive, the architecture of the Main Quad, and the vastness of the campus. There’s something about the golden color of all the buildings matched with the open green space that had me smiling wider and wider with every turn. I felt perfectly in my element.

Downtown Palo Alto is covered with coffee shops, pizza joints, a smattering of Thai and Indian food. Wi-fi everywhere. I’ve missed being in a college town. Hope is alive and well on the streets here. I went past the HP headquarters, the Wall Street Journal, and the Ning office. The ideas and creativity are buzzing around in the air here and if you linger long enough, I’m sure you’re bound to pick up a stroke of brilliance or two. It’s infectious.

The kindness and ease of people here is enough to make you wonder why you ever decided to live anywhere else. I sat next to a man on the plane today. He slept for most of the time and we didn’t exchange more than 10 words. As I got up out of my seat, he said, “By the way, you seem like a very nice lady. I wish you well. Good luck to you.” I was a bit shocked. I didn’t tell him why I was in San Francisco. I actually didn’t tell him anything about me. All I could think to mutter back was “you, too.”

There’s something to be said for stepping off of the island of Manhattan and finding out how life is lived in other places. It informs us, helps us to think differently about one another and our experience in the world. I love New York and it’s my home though I am grateful to be able to go to places like California where life is a little bit slower, people are a little less suspicious, and the spirit is a little bit lighter. Let’s hope I can figure out how to bottle it and bring some back East with me.

The image above can be found at: http://www.gsb.stanford.edu/photos/campus-palmdrive.jpg

art, California, dreams, movie, travel

Bottle Shock

Christa Avampato

I have a crush on Bradley Whitford. His role on West Wing almost made me believe in the goodness of politicians. I went with my friend, Dan, to see Boeing-Boeing. A bit long, but I loved it. During intermission I was reading the Playbill and saw in Bradley’s bio that he has a role in the new film Bottle Shock. Never heard of it. Then walking around my neighborhood a few days ago, I saw a poster for the movie. Must be a sign – I need to see this movie. Whoever said that good old fashion promotion doesn’t work?


My friend, Monika, agreed to go with me and I’m stilling smiling from the good feeling I got watching that film, even if Bradley’s part is all of 5 minutes long. I can’t believe that I almost missed this film – the promotion seems very light. And that’s a shame for a movie that is so delightful; as an indie film, I suppose money for promotion is scant at best. I’ve heard people refer to it as this summer’s Sideways. Forget that – it’s 10 times better than Sideways. As Monika said, “it’s all the fun with none of the cynicism.” And it’s based on a wonderful, heart-warming, true story. Plus that cutie, Freddy Rodriguez (Ugly Betty), is in it, too, along with a perfectly cast Alan Rickman and Bill Pullman.

I’ve been fortunate enough to have visited Northern California a number of times, mostly for vacation. I nearly moved there right after college but I didn’t get the job I was interviewing for there and couldn’t afford to move there without one. I have a particular fondness for that area of the country, and if it weren’t for the 3000 that separates it from everyone and everything that I know and love in this world, I’d be there in a heartbeat. But those 3000 miles are significant, and I gave my heart to NYC so Northern California will remain one of those places I adore from afar and occasionally have a fling with while on vacation. 

What I love about Bottle Shock is that it dispels Napa and Sonoma as these snobby, upper-crust places, and tells the story of their humble roots and the people who grew up cultivating that land and building an industry from scratch, despite the presumably superior competition of the French winemakers. But, you know what they say about those that assume…

In a sort of cheeky, sappy moment in the film, there were a few quotes I’ve been thinking about all day. Bill Pullman is walking the vineyards with his intern and says that the best fertilizer for vines are their owner’s footsteps and that it’s best to starve the vines, make them struggle, because that is the way they’ll produce the best grapes. Just before that scene, Freddy Rodriguez discusses his philosophy about wine-making – that it is best done not by the rich who buy up land to grow a hobby, but by those who have spent a lifetime feeling the soil under their nails. 

While the movie is about wine-making, these lessons are certainly applicable for all of us. At its core, the movie is about sacrifice and commitment. Can we surrender the certain, predictable choices to stay true to who we are, what we believe, and what we love? There is a passion among wine-makers that is difficult not to share when we hear them speak about their art, their calling, and their love and affection for the land. Their dedication is admirable and their ability to enjoy and savor good wine and a good, honest life left me longing for the left coast. Maybe someday….