I talked to a friend yesterday who just isn’t feeling the holidays this year. She’s had a difficult year, and the holidays are proving to be stressful and draining to her already. I listened to her for a long time, and was glad to be there for her. When she looked at me and said, “You know what I mean?”, I said, “Yes. I do. And you don’t have to do the holidays this year. You’re an adult. You can choose.” She burst into tears, not out of sadness but out of relief. She hadn’t thought of the option of opting out. And she felt better. A little lighter.
This is an option open to everyone. Do whatever you need to do to feel lighter. You can feel whatever you want to feel and do whatever you want to do—holidays or no holidays, for every reason or for no reason. And if, like my sweet friend, you need someone to just listen for a while, I’m here. I’m all ears.
“If you feel like you don’t fit in, in this world, it is because you are here to help create a new one.” ~Jocelyn Daher
We do everything we can to alleviate discomfort. I’m not talking about making yourself some chicken soup (or a giant bowl of ice cream) when you’re feeling sick. I mean that we will say and do things (or not, as the case may be) against our better judgement for the sake of avoiding discomfort or in an effort to fit in. My friend, Sara, posted the quote above and it is exactly what I needed to hear.
Discomfort is a great gift. It tells you where you shouldn’t be and what you shouldn’t be doing so that you move on and go where you’re needed, wanted, and appreciated. Discomfort is the motivation to go, do, and be something different. Learn from it. Use it. Recognize that discomfort now is leading you to exactly where you need to be tomorrow.
“Don’t think. It complicates things. Just feel, and if it feels like home, then follow its path.” ~R.M. Drake
I’ve started 2016 embracing this idea. Our guts are so powerful and wise and intuitive. They know the way home. They know exactly where we should and shouldn’t go, whom we should and shouldn’t be with, and what we should and shouldn’t do. They know far more than our heads, far more than our hearts. And no, we often can’t explain a gut feeling. It doesn’t need explanation. It needs only action. So trust it. Follow it. Believe it. Even if your head and your heart are conflicted, don’t waste time and energy questioning the gut. Just know that, now and always, it has your back.