“The trouble is, you think you have time.” ~Buddha
Immediately after I finish one of my paper collages, I replace it with a blank one on my easel. That may sound a bit over zealous. Shouldn’t I at least give myself some time to just revel in being done with a project before pushing on?
Ed, my teacher, mentor, and friend, posted this quote from the Buddha a few days ago and it really struck me. I’m very conscious of the passage of time. Some might say too conscious of it. I’ve known, loved, and lost too many people too soon, and the same is true for many of my friends. We think we have time, but really, time has us.
I’ve learned the hard way that it’s much better to look at a blank canvas that symbolizes our next great potential project than to spend our time looking back at our accomplishments. I’ll save the reflection for when I’m very old and gray and less able to do. Now is a time for moving forward and crafting what comes next.
“Life is about change. Sometimes it’s painful. Sometimes it’s beautiful. Most of the time, it’s both.” ~ Lana Lang
You may find that you’re ready for a change. Change is liberating and difficult. It’s exhilarating and frightening. There is rarely a good time for it. We are rarely truly ready for it. While careful planning can help to create a transition, sometimes you have to do something radical. You have to just leap with the confidence that you’ll be able to handle whatever happens. And you will. You will.
When something doesn’t go your way, do you spend any time wondering “why on Earth did I have to go through THAT?” Consider this explanation:
Let’s say you’re in a relationship with someone who turns out to not be the person he represented himself to be when you first met him. It’s highly likely you’ll wonder what his purpose was in your life because now you’re really confused and hurt by the end of it all. Why didn’t the Universe just keep that guy away from you to begin with?
Take a step back because maybe it’s not all about you. Consider this: the Universe wants all of us to rise up and become our best selves, that jerk of a guy included. So you were a gift to him from the Universe. A valuable, precious, amazing gift. And, yes, you could have helped him a lot. You would have been the best thing for him. But he didn’t want the gift of you. Maybe he didn’t know how to appreciate the gift. Maybe he didn’t feel worthy of it. Maybe he didn’t think enough of himself to feel that he deserved it. Or maybe, and this is the saddest reason in my opinion, he actually doesn’t want to be happy. He’s comfortable being miserable.
Your gifts and your light are too valuable to be wasted. He didn’t appreciate the gift of you so he doesn’t get to keep it. The Universe puts an end to it all, and that’s how it has to be for your sake. This whole thing wasn’t about you at all. It was about him. The Universe would have loved nothing better than for him to evolve, but he chose not to so away you go, one way or another.
This duality of what’s in it for you and what’s in it for the system as a whole is always in play. It applies to every interaction we have in every setting. Something for you and something for someone else that together leads to something for the system of which you’re both a part. Apply it to jobs, friendships, romantic relationships, creative projects. The same principles apply.
It really isn’t all about you. It’s about all of us, together.
“I would rather be a hot mess of bold action, a make-it-happen-learn-on-the-fly kind of person, than a perfectly organized coward.” ~ Brendon Burchard
This quote resonates with me in such a powerful way. We might think we have all our ducks in a row, that we’ve accounted for every possibility, and yet we find that life has a funny way of throwing us the curve ball we never saw coming. Contingency plans won’t save us. Our abilities to adapt, evolve, grow, and learn are our saving graces. They are the things that will help us not only survive, but thrive, in a world that will always change. I don’t rely on my organizational skills to get by; instead, I believe that I can and will handle whatever life throws my way. Courage to face our challenges head-on is everything.
Sometimes we resist change. We like how things are, or at least knowing how things are feels comforting because they’re familiar. Giving up what we have in the process of change feels like a loss. But what if it’s not? What if change brings us something better? Then change becomes not a process of loss, but one of gain, enrichment, and growth. That’s the kind of change I can embrace with both arms and an open heart.
Christa Avampato 