goals, time

My Year of Hopefulness – Time Remaining

Christa Avampato

I had to take a training class today online and in the lower right-hand corner was the familiar progress bar telling me how much time there was remaining for the session. The training was a little dull so I had plenty of time to think about that progress bar, and how much I’d like to have a progress bar for other areas of my life. While in DC this weekend, I was reminded how calming it is to have those electronic boards that tell passengers many minutes until their trains arrive. Knowing how much longer we have to go through something helps us to manage the process of getting through it.

Trouble is that progress bars in most areas of our life are nonexistent. We don’t know how much longer a job or relationship or our health will last. We usually aren’t able to gauge how much longer it will before we reach a certain goal. There are bumps and twists and turns on every road. Some set us back, some help us leap forward, and some set us on a new course entirely. There’s no electronic board to calm us down.

We could consider that every day is its only small progress bar, and our only goal is to get to the end of the day having given all our activities everything we’ve got. That way no matter how much time we have left, we can be assured that we gave as much as we had, worked as hard as we could, laughed and smiled and enjoyed every minute like it was our last. The best case scenario is that we’ll get to do it all over again tomorrow, making a little more progress in our lives, and the worst case scenario is that we put our best foot forward right up until the end.

blogging, writing

My Year of Hopefulness – How to reach a tipping point

Christa Avampato

This week was a good one in the writing department. I was humming along right at the start of the week, and have been off and running since. It’s a long slow climb to remake ourselves, to truly learn a new skill from the inside out. I started writing every day two years ago, after 31 years of just wanting to be a writer.

I didn’t know what to do so I just began. First with this blog, then with Examiner.com, and now as a guest blogger on sites like Rypple and small call outs in publications like the Wall Street Journal and DailyWorth. Next week I’m joining a new team blogging effort, details to follow in a later post, and this Fall I’ll be writing a blog for the Transport Group on their Fall production of The Boys in the Band.

My friend and mentor, Richard, has been listening to my writing plan for some time now and was the first to say, “at some point, the switch will flip and you’ll find a way to make all this investment in your writing pay off.” He’s talking about a tipping point. Until this week, I didn’t realize that the surest way to that tipping point in writing isn’t only about hunkering down and pounding out the words on my Mac. It’s just as much about connection and kinship with others. To get to a tipping point, we have to let others in and give others the opportunity to invite us in as well.

My writing tipping point may still be a long way off. I’m not there yet, but for the first time in two years, I think I might be getting to that point Richard talks about. At least I see it out there on the horizon. I’m just not sure how far away that horizon is compared to where I am right now. And that’s okay. A little light keeps me going.

The photo above can be found at: http://phlogthat.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/img_7592.jpg

career, creative process, creativity, discovery, entrepreneurship, friendship, invention, job, relationships, science

My Year of Hopefulness – Lots of ideas

Christa Avampato

“The best way to have a good idea is to have lots of ideas.” ~ Linus Pauling, American scientist

It’s a romantic ideal that in a flash of insight we finally come up with a brilliant idea to overcome some challenge. Truth is it takes us time to wrestle a problem to the ground. Lots of ideas have to be considered, tried, tested, and tweaked to get us to an elegant solution.

While Linus Pauling was referencing his own work in science, his quote applies to many areas. Where we live, where we work, and who we spend our time with can take some trial and error before we strike just the right place and people. This is my third try at living in New York, and I think I got it right this time. There have been a lot of ups and downs over the 10 years since I first moved here. Finally, I found a way to make this place home.

Pauling’s quote also holds up in entrepreneurship, too. I’ve now been doing interviews with a variety of entrepreneurs for five months and I’ve asked each of them for advice to others who are considering starting a business. All of them have said to give it a shot, recognizing that it takes a couple of years to really get a business off the ground. We might need to kick around a number of different ideas for businesses before we hit upon one that makes our hearts sing, that makes us want to dive in with everything we’ve got to make it work.

Having lots of ideas requires patience and persistence. We have to be willing to try and try again, and again and again. We need to be patient with ourselves and believe in the slow steady process that leads to true insight and learning. Flashes of quick genius happen once in a while. What is a much more of a sure bet is that if we keep trying new ideas, one will certainly rise to the top.

The photo above is Linus Pauling holding a molecular model. It can be found at: http://osulibrary.orst.edu/specialcollections/coll/pauling/pauling-qv09-198xi.050.jpg

dreams, friendship, music, New York City

My Year of Hopefulness – New York as Neverland

Christa Avampato

If you’re looking for a fountain of youth, consider living in New York City. If it’s your fervent desire to grow up, be a realist, and take life very seriously then this might not be the place for you. This week in particular I’ve noticed the dreamy quality of New York. It’s a place that cultivates and perpetuates dreams of all kinds. In New York, I always feel possibility just around the corner. You really can be anything here.

During the summer, the many outdoor events remind me of everything that New York has to offer and how many people there are to meet just outside the front door. This week, the New York Philharmonic performs their two annual free concerts in Central Park. In all the years I’ve lived in New York, I’ve never seen one of these concerts until this year. My friend, Brandi, left New York this week for greener pastures in DC and a group of us got together for the concert to bid her a fond farewell which none of us are happy about. Brandi goes to this concert every year, and wanted to make sure to catch this one, her last as a New York City resident.

Brandi arrived first, getting us an excellent space in the middle section. From that vantage point we were in the middle of a wonderfully positive energy. The Park was packed, and during the evening I grew more and more grateful for the great diversity housed in this tiny island. Even on our small blanket, different groups of friends joined together from different walks of life to enjoy the event.

In the middle of the Park, I was reminded just how many people live in New York, and how unique each of their stories are. I could hear the laughter from every corner mixing with the music. People were sharing the details of their days. Reminiscing. Talking about what they hoped for and dreamed of. Some people were celebrating and others explained their gratitude for the amazing weather and the opportunity to be together. Flashbulbs were going off all around us as people snapped photos to remember the occasion.

The New York Phil’s concerts represent New York at its best. The many voices coming together, paths converging. Before we left the park, I took a look around, happy to live in a place that constantly changes and yet always feels like home, a place where anything and everything is possible. As the closing fireworks went off, for a moment I actually believed that I could reach out and touch them if I really wanted to. It’s the happy side effect of being a city that makes you feel like you can fly.

career, economy, Examiner, finance, financing, job, money, personal finance, women, work

NY Business Strategies Examiner – Interview with Amanda Steinberg, Founder of DailyWorth

Christa Avampato

“No one is going to fix financial inequity for women. We have to recognize our own self-worth, ask for higher salaries, invest more aggressively, and build our own wealth.” ~ Amanda Steinberg, DailyWorth Founder

For my interview with Amanda, please visit: http://www.examiner.com/examiner/x-2901-NY-Business-Strategies-Examiner~y2009m7d15-Interview-with-Amanda-Steinberg-Founder-of-DailyWorth

blog, friendship, writing

My Year of Hopefulness – Finding your voice and your pack

Christa Avampato

“He who cannot howl will not find his pack.” ~ Charles Simic

Your own clear, strong voice can be elusive. Writing helps me find mine every day, and that provides a benefit for every other area of my life. I’ve connected with people I’d never have met otherwise. I’ve developed friendships, mentorships, and a vast network as a result of my writing. It’s been a true blessing in my life. Through writing, I found my voice and that helped me find like-minded people.

Someone recently commented to me that bloggers are arrogant and self-indulgent people who just want to talk about themselves. I’m not sure when we turned the corner from wanting to share our experiences to being arrogant and self-indulgent. If we follow that train of thought that means every person who ever wrote a memoir, opinion column, or created any piece of art in any medium that somehow conveys their life experiences is arrogant and self-indulgent. And consider how many stories didn’t get told, and therefore didn’t get shared, and therefore didn’t help anyone because other people like the one I spoke with about bloggers discouraged others from finding their voice. It’s sad.

I’d argue that anyone who thinks their life isn’t worth blogging isn’t living an interesting enough life. Whether they choose to do that or not is of course their business, though the reason for not doing it should never be that they aren’t interesting enough. People are a lot more interesting than they give themselves credit for.

A friend of mine has been pretty badly bullied at work by a senior leader. During a recent focus group about this leader, he found that many other people felt the same way. Until this focus group, he felt alone in his predicament, wanting very much to keep his job and also wanting to stand up for himself. He got that chance through his focus group, though only found his voice because others around him found theirs too.

In a way, the person I spoke to about bloggers is a bully, too. A bully is anyone who dissuades someone else from taking up an activity that helps them realize who they are and helps them find others like them. Or they’re at the very least incredibly unhappy, miserable people. I watch the Today Show while I’m getting ready in the morning, and this morning there was a segment on bullies. It’s becoming all too common these days for adults to encounter bullies. They inflict fear on others because they live in fear themselves.

Finding your voice, and your pack, is about releasing our own fear and not allowing others to make us be fearful. You owe it yourself. The joy of life is found by connecting with others, sharing with others, and helping others to find their own happiness. Don’t let someone else take that joy away from you under any circumstances. Share your story, spread your wings, and make the most of the days you’ve got.

education, learning, passion, science

My Year of Hopefulness – The Laws of (Minimizing) Distraction

Christa Avampato

Distraction is everywhere. I’ve recently learned about a company that does brain imaging using neurofeedback to help people get “in the zone”. Athletes, artists, politicians, CEOs, writers. Fascinating stuff. And before you know it I was off and running researching psychology programs to see if I should get another Masters degree.

There’s a key difference between new knowledge that informs our current work, or the work we’d really like to be doing, and developing a brand new passion. A brand new passion takes a lot of dedication, time, and very often, money. After business school, I wanted to really understand and participate in social media, and I really wanted to focus on the craft of writing. It’s taken me thousands of hours over the course of two years to get a handle on those things. Well worth the time and effort because those are passions of mine. They define me in a very significant way.

There are a million interesting things in this world to learn so it’s no wonder that there seem to be no end to distractions. Given my propensity for distraction, I’ve recently done two things that have been helpful ways to keep my focus:

1.) Take on only 1 or 2 goals, not 5 or 6, in any one area of life.
2.) Write those 1 or 2 goals down and post them up in place you will see regularly. I’ve found that the inside of the front door is a good one so that way I read it every time I come into and leave my apartment.

Limiting distraction and maintaining focus is difficult work. It requires constant vigilance. But it’s critical to happiness and meaningful accomplishment in our lives. I have a friend who is forever getting involved in more research projects, prolonging his doctoral studies. Another friend of mine has been collecting degrees of a wide variety and in the process making her feel more unhappy and lost. There’s a balance we have to strike between expanding our horizons and keeping our eye on the ball. In general, I find the golden rule is to expand my horizons only to the point that my interests are reinforcing and supporting one another. So far, so good.

art, comedy, dreams, television

My Year of Hopefulness – Drop Dead Diva

Christa Avampato

“You are who you wanna be.” ~ Jane on Drop Dead Diva, played by Brooke Elliott

Last night, the show Drop Dead Diva had its premiere on Lifetime. Most pilots are awful. Beyond awful. This one is inspired, funny, smart, and tragic. Best of all, the back story is one of striving and thriving – a great example for all of us.

My friend, Brooke Elliott, is the star of Drop Dead Diva. I met her in 2002 when I joined the touring company of Beauty and the Beast. She is the funniest person I know. Some people tell funny jokes. Some people have crazy stuff that happens to them and their recounts of those crazy events are funny. Brooke is just funny, about everything. I can be in the most horrid mood, and the way she says hello sets me into giggles. It’s a wonderful, rare quality.

Two years ago I moved back to New York after business school and reconnected with Brooke. We had been in touch over email over the years, but hadn’t seen each other regularly since I left Beauty and the Beast in 2003. By 2007, Brooke had left musical theatre and was focusing on crossing over to film and TV work.

Brooke’s story is one of the most hopeful and compelling I know. When she left musical theatre, a lot of people asked her if she was going to get a day job while she pursued TV and film. Her answer was simple, “No, I’m going to book an acting job. I’m an actor.” No frustration, no anger, no naivety. She was going to practice her craft and make a living doing it. That acting job she was going to book is now Drop Dead Diva. And as so many critics have said, “Brooke Elliott is drop dead terrific.”

Her success comes as no surprise to me. It was just a matter of time before Brooke had her own show. With talent, grace, and determination so immense, the world was going to find her sooner or later and give her the credit she so richly deserves. After all, you are who you wanna be. It’s advice we could all stand to hear a little more often.

If you missed the premiere of Drop Dead Diva, catch the replay of the full episode at http://www.mylifetime.com/on-tv/shows/drop-dead-diva/video and tune in to Lifetime on Sundays at 9pm Eastern.

business, career, economy, entrepreneurship, Examiner, job

NY Business Strategies Examiner – Is corporate America on its way out of style?

Christa Avampato

Every generation is defined by a world event. My grandparents were shaped by the Great Depression. My parents by World War II. My Uncle Tom by Viet Nam. Me by the crazy 80’s. (I recognize that my world event is not on par with World War II, but that’s the brakes!) So now I look at my niece, Lorelei, who is 18 months old. Her life will be shaped by the aftermath of the digital age and the Great Recession.

For the full article, please visit:
http://www.examiner.com/examiner/x-2901-NY-Business-Strategies-Examiner~y2009m7d12-Are-big-corporations-staged-to-fall-from-grace

comedy, education, media, New York Times, teaching, technology

My Year of Hopefulness – How-to with Howcast

Christa Avampato

Sunday morning is my favorite time of the week. I feel rested from Saturday, likely had a great time out with friends on Saturday evening, and I relax on Sunday morning doing anything that makes me happy. Usually it’s getting my coffee and reading the New York Times. Throw in a great feature story on CBS Sunday Morning, and I’m smiling from ear to ear all day. Sundays are a gift I treasure.

In this morning’s New York Times, I read about Howcast, a new company with a noble, elegant mission: “Howcast shows consumers engaging, useful how-to videos and guides wherever, whenever they need to learn how.” Its sole goal is to help people help themselves with just about anything. The range of content is immense: some are very serious, even life-saving, informative clips (how to treat someone for shock) while others are flat-out hilarious (how to fight off a vampire). The platform is easy to use and has a clean design. The videos are short and succinct. Best of all, community members can add how-to videos of their own, so if you have an expertise that you want to share with the world, now you have a clever platform to do it.

Some of my favorites from this morning’s hunt through Howcast:
How to Survive a Bear Attack – I was laughing out loud
Fantastic collection of Yoga poses – their sports and fitness collection is extensive, from how to dribble a soccer ball to how to roast the ultimate marshmallow
Websites an resources on how to learn a foreign language
How to get your home ready for a dog

The search function is robust; I found the info I needed quickly. The load times of the videos were much shorter than I expected and the resolution is high. There are also wikiguides on topics should you choose to read the information rather than watch a video. And while other sites require account creation with a username and password, Howcast can sync with a Facebook account, allowing users to participate immediately to comment, vote, and favorite videos. Whether you’re looking for useful, timely info or a source of smart entertainment, Howcast provides it anywhere you are, exactly when you need it. DIY really is the new luxury and Howcast helps you get it.

Follow them on Twitter @howcast.