creativity, discovery, friendship, innovation, inspiration

Step 220: Life on Our Own Terms

Christa Avampato

“We start off scared, and we stay scared until we’re done.” ~ Ed Catmull, President and Co-founder of Pixar Animation Studios

I wish someone would just eliminate acronyms like BAU (business as usual) and SOP (standard operating procedures). At various times in my life, I tried to live by someone else’s standards. I wince with embarrassment when I think about those times. They landed me in situations that left me supremely unhappy. Those times of living by someone else’s definitions of success and happiness were like death by a thousand little cuts. I lost myself and spent a long time digging my way out of those messes.

Many of my friends are now going through intense times of self-rediscovery. They’re trying new things, exploring, re-framing, and growing. This work isn’t easy. Sometimes it’s painful and scary. They’re unsure where all of it will lead, if it leads anywhere at all. They keep reaching even when it feels like they’re reaching into the dark. I’m right there with them. I get it; we’re in this together. I’m proud of them and inspired by them. I can’t wait to see what they create next.

From the outside it might feel foolish to upset the apple cart, to take our perfectly fine lives and chuck it all for a more authentic, original dream. But I know we’re all right in taking this route. The truly crazy, risky path is to stay in place. Fear is a healthy, helpful feeling to have so long as we have enough courage to put that fear aside and keep going. I’m all for continuous re-invention. It keeps life interesting and regret at bay.

exercise, habit, health

Step 219: A Return to the Gym

Christa Avampato

Before today, I never set foot inside a New York City gym. When I lived in Florida, DC, and Virginia, I went regularly and really enjoyed it. New York gym-going is a whole different ballgame. There used to be a stereotype of New York City gym people – they wear make-up, carefully select their outfits, and try not to sweat too much. An old-school image at best, and probably a way-too-broad characterization, though that image kept me from ever joining a gym in New York City. I like to work out; I just don’t like people watching me work out.

Today, I took my 1-week complimentary pass to New York Sports Club and tried it on for size for a few reasons:

1.) I took a few runs in Riverside Park last week, despite the awful heat and humidity. I felt like a bump on a log, sequestered indoors by summer, so I put on a brave face, grabbed my ipod, and went for it. I hated every second of it. For 2 of the 4 season in New York City, I don’t like to exercise outside. And with my appetite rivaling that of an NFL linebacker, not exercising is not an option.)

2.) My company provides a really valuable discount on the monthly gym fee at NYSC. It’s not widely advertised so I recently learned about it. (Check with you HR department to see if they have gym deals – and if they don’t, ask them if they’re interested in offering that perk. It’s a fairly large discount!)

3.) I like a variety of group fitness classes. I’ve been exploring membership at yoga studios, and while the quality of classes at studios tends to be higher (though not always, even in Manhattan where there is a yoga studio on every corner), the value of so many classes being offered as a package with a gym membership can’t be beat. Some NYSCs also have pools so there may be some additional adult swimming lessons in my future, too.

4.) NYSC is everywhere I am. Work, home, neighborhoods where I spend a lot of my free time. I didn’t realize how many locations they have and my membership allows me to go to any of them at any time, no black out times. And the hours of operation at most of the locations runs from very early morning to very late evening. There really is no excuse for me to not go 3-4 times per week.

5.) The New York gym and gym-goer stereotype is wrong. No one was staring at me while I got my heart rate up on the Precor machine and it wasn’t overly packed. Okay, there was the odd girl here and there who spent as much time checking herself out in the mirror as she did on the treadmill. And there were a couple of overly muscular guys who I’m very worried about because I don’t think they can even touch their knees much less their toes. Those types are just weird and they’re everywhere. But most people were there just doing their thing: burning calories, sweating out stress, and getting their workout in for the day. When I got home I felt better for having done the same.

choices, decision-making, imagination, intelligence

Step 218: Thinking and Doing Are Two Different Things

Christa Avampato

“Thinking is easy, acting is difficult, and to put one’s thoughts into action is the most difficult thing in the world. Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing it not enough; we must do.” ~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, German Philosopher

“Well done is better than well said.” ~ Ben Franklin

This morning Chris Brogan wrote an interesting post about setting a course that made me think of these Goethe and Franklin quotes.

I had a friend who really wanted to find a job. He’s a smart guy though I have to admit that he’s lazy. He expects his intelligence to carry him through life. He would routinely say that he’s tired of proving himself and potential employers should really recognize his intelligence. He would talk about all these grand plans he had for his career and then spent the bulk of his time playing video games and cleaning his apartment obsessively. He made a lot of plans and articulated a beautiful vision for his career, but he never followed through on anything. Intelligence really doesn’t matter if the ability to execute is lacking.

Every day this same friend would give me (unsolicited) advice on my career, my writing, dating, and myriad of other aspects of my life. If I had taken his advice, I am convinced I would now be angry and miserable. I ignored his advice, and eventually that choice ended up bringing our friendship to an abrupt halt. He wanted someone to be miserable with and when I decided not to play that role, we ended up not having much to talk about.

My friend was one of these “idea guys” who wants to surround himself with people who can bring his vision to life. And that’s an interesting idea but I don’t know anyone who wants to sign up for that gig. Everyone has ideas; the ones that see the light of the day and make a difference are the ones that move from the mind into the real world.

By all means, make plans. Change them, switch them up, talk to people to get their perspective. But eventually we have to stop planning and starting doing. There isn’t any other way forward. Actions, not plans, define who we are and ultimately what we’ll be remembered for.

celebration, change, community, discovery, experience, friendship

Step 217: 5 Ways the World Seems Small to Me

Christa Avampato

“”It was crazy how small the world truly was. It was a matter of opening up to it.” ~Colum McCann, Let the Great World Spin

My niece, Lorelei, could spend an entire afternoon singing “It’s a Small World.” She lives in Florida and when my sister and brother-in-law take her to Disney World (which happens often), she immediately asks to go on that ride. She loves all of the music, the different scenes, and the boat ride. For my niece and her generation, the world is small and growing smaller all the time.

The quote above from Let the Great World Spin, a remarkable read that I highly recommend, got me to thinking about all of my own small world examples. It still amazes me that in a city of millions, the many circles I run in merge and overlap so often. Some fun examples:

1.) My friend, Amanda, found me through my blog after we went to Penn together (graduated the same year) and lived in the same city (D.C.) for two years. I probably saw her out in the world countless times, though our writing actually lead us to one another. Our friend, Sara, found me through a mutual friend and as it turned out she lived in D.C. at the same time Amanda and I lived there, and her and Amanda have remarkably similar circumstances in their personal lives.

2.) People have a habit of recurring in my life. Even separated by many miles and years, old friends pop up in the most unlikely places and I always laugh when I learn that our paths have run so close together without even knowing it. My favorite of these is my friend, Jeff, who shows up as my little guardian angel right when I need him most – for example, when I’m job hunting (he helped start my career in professional theatre) or completely lost in Amsterdam (I ran into him on street corner when completely at my wit’s end.) We barely talk between those instances and yet it he never feels like a stranger to me.

3.) Twitter, Facebook, and blogs of every variety make it easy to find out pack. I love that geography no longer limits the relationships to begin, build, and keep. Let people talk about information overload – for us information junkies, Twitter creates a dream-come-true candy store.

4.) Books build bridges across time and space. I love that the writing of people who lived centuries before me have stories that resonate with me. And I feel such a gratitude toward them for writing it all down. Those experiences keep me writing, in the hopes that centuries from now someone may read something I wrote and think “here’s a person who gets me.”

5.) I love confluence and synchronicity. I love the feeling that rises up when something unexpected happens to me and I understand why. Steve Jobs said that we only understand our lives and how they unfold by looking backward. I agree. When I reflect on my own history, even when it seemed so random in the moment, a reason for every circumstance always appears clear as day. This realization makes tough times easier to manage.

What experiences make you feel like we live in a small (or big, as the case may be) world?

childhood, dreams, imagination

Step 216: Dreaming Impossible

Christa Avampato

“When we are dreaming alone it is only a dream. When we are dreaming with others, it is the beginning of reality.” ~ DH Camara (as quoted by Bridget Ayers on Twitter)

As kids, we dream. Somewhere along the way someone told us to do things like “grow up”, “take responsibility”, and “get a REAL job.” Those people make me mad. I have a hard time understanding why dream must be mutually exclusive from growing up (whatever that means), taking responsibility, and having a real job. Who decided that dreams are by their very nature immature, reckless, and fake?

Reading several books about Pixar and one about bring games into everyday life strengthened my resolve to dream and bring others into my dreams. These books also strengthened my conviction that a company and a career can attain wild success and have fun as a core ingredient. I might even go so far as to say that to have a company, career, and life that attains wild success, fun must be the main ingredient. Today I decided that every day going forward I must play more, no matter where I am or who I’m with.

I don’t mean that I intend to goof off as much as possible in the hope that money falls from the sky and into my bank account. I want to roll up my sleeves and get to work building, creating, and playing. Walt Disney built Disneyland in a year, from empty blueprints to people walking into his first park. People told him countless times it couldn’t be done, until of course it was done. “It’s fun to do the impossible,” he famously said. I agree.

Pictured above: a young Walt Disney and his most prized creation. Ironically, when Walt first arrived in Hollywood he thought he was late to the animation party because Felix the Cat had gained so much fame. Little did he know that he wasn’t poised to develop characters as famous at Felix, but to set the new standards for the entire entertainment industry.

art, failure

Step 215: Famous Failures

Christa Avampato

My friend, Amanda, wrote a very brave post about “failure”, meaning she tried something that didn’t go the way she wanted it to. That post coincided with my reading about failing the Pixar Way – at the speed of change.

My brother-in-law, Kyle, really should start a career as an animator, or maybe an animation historian. He knows more about Pixar and John Lasseter than they know about themselves. After a long conversation with him about Pixar, I picked up two books about the company: Innovate the Pixar Way and The Pixar Touch.

Both books gives us the background of how Pixar started and innovated its way into the top animation house in the world, despite having no nest egg to fall back on. My favorite piece of Pixar trivia: John Lasseter ended up at Pixar when Disney fired him for voicing his support for computer animation to Disney’s senior leadership. They disagreed with him, he stood his ground, and then they let him go from his dream job, the only job he ever wanted. Lasseter left Disney severely disappointed and disillusioned. By all accepted business practices of the day, Lasseter failed.

Of course, the story continues, as stories always do, and in the end Lasseter, the classic underdog, won. He now runs Disney animation, the very unit that deemed him unfit as an animator under the Disney roof. A Hollywood movie in the making.

In Innovate the Pixar Way, authors Bill Capodagli and Lynn Jackson list other famous failures and the list bears repeating. Some I knew and sometimes surprised the heck out of me!:

1.) The fax machine was a failed invention in the 1840’s

2.) The copy machine was rejected by GE and IBM in 1937

3.) John Grisham’s first novel, A Time to Kill, was rejected by 12 publishers. It took him 3 years to write it, and Wynwood Press eventually published it. It went on to become a best-seller and a Hollywood movie that grossed almost $110M. A first edition of the book goes for ~$4,000 on eBay. (Fun fact – in business school I lived in a house down the road from John Grisham’s home in Charlottesville, VA! He spoke at my University-wide graduation.)

4.) Henry Ford went bankrupt 5 times

5.) Vincent Van Gogh sold only one painting during his lifetime

6.) Orville Wright was expelled from elementary school

7.) Michael Jordan once failed to make his varsity basketball team

8.) Oprah Winfrey failed as a news reporter

9.) Winston Churchill finished last in his class

10.) J.K. Rowling was a jobless, single mom on welfare when she wrote the first Harry Potter book. (Incidentally, Disney CEO Michael Eisner passed on making the Harry Potter series into movies – even Disney still makes bad calls from time to time!)

I wrote this post to remind myself that when failure comes knocking, and it inevitably does for everyone, I don’t need to despair. In failure, I have good company. Just ask John Lasseter.

The image above depicts John Lasseter with Lightning McQueen, animated star of the hit movie Cars. The film was hailed as a critical success and its global gross topped $244M.

books, game, innovation, play

Step 214: A Review of Gamestorming: A Playbook for Innovators, Rulebreakers, and Changemakers

Christa Avampato

For several weeks, I’ve been combing my bookshelves for activities to incorporate into my LIM College class on social media marketing. I wanted games to drive home the information in unconventional, interactive ways. I went to my theatre books, my business books, and my books filled with writing exercises. Nothing seemed quite right. And then O’Reilly Media sent me Gamestorming. It felt like a gift out of the sky. My anxiety about the class diminished a bit more with every page.

Gamestorming details games that engage groups, both large and small, in learning and discovery. They work in corporations and in schools, and I’d like to add that they are a valuable tool for navigating just about any decision and complication in life. I found myself noting in nearly every margin how to use each game. The clear, concise description, depictions, and plan for each took a great deal of thought and care from the authors.

The metaphor of life as a game is well worked over. The trouble with the game of life is that there are no rules. You don’t make them and neither does anyone else. They change from moment to moment, and the rule that seemed to work today may never be useful again. We are forced in every situation to think on our feet. Gamestorming gives us more confidence and empowers us to take our futures in our own hands. Get it here.

goals, opportunity, success

Step 213: My July Accomplishments and August Goals

Christa Avampato

“When you start to develop your powers of empathy and imagination, the whole world opens up to you.” ~ Susan Sarandon

I definitely felt the world opening up to me in July. Many times, in ways I never expected. It was a month of great learning.

July Goals:
1.) Soak up the sun in Greece and enjoy every second of my teacher training time with Shiva Rea.

This didn’t go according to plan. The retreat was much less than enjoyable than I expected though I learned so much about myself and my yoga. Greece is a beautiful country and I am glad I got to see it, particularly for a day in Athens. The retreat fell below expectations, so much so that I can’t say with honesty that I will continue to study Shiva’s style. Instead, I am branching out and exploring other styles. For more reflections on my retreat, click here.

2.) Meet my little niece, Aubree, and hang with my sis and older niece, Lorelei.

We had a fantastic time together in Florida. I am so glad I got to spend so much time with my nieces. I miss them every day and realized that I need more geographic flexibility in my life to spend time with them. The photo in this post is me and my little cuties at my sister’s house.

3.) Begin actively looking for a weekly yoga class to teach in NYC at an established gym or studio.

I contacted the Downtown Community Center in the Financial District and scored a spot on their sub list. More to come when I have my first class there…

4.) Begin thinking about my next e-book. (I’m taking suggestions!)

I have done quite a bit of work on this front. I am working on a new blog that will lead to an online workbook type of publication to help people use their yoga practice to shape their personal financial plans. For a little sneak preview, check out my recent guest post on Elephant Journal.

5.) Continue prep work for my LIM College class that I will start teaching in the Fall: Viral, Guerilla, and Social Media Marketing.

I got the syllabus in good shape. Not finalized, but heading in a solid direction. I’ve met with the head of the marketing department several times to review a structure and format, and I selected the different weekly topics. I also accepted that I will make up a good deal of this course on the fly. The world of new media changes too quickly to lay it all out months ahead of time. Relevance of the moment makes improvisation as necessity.

6.) Do some marketing of my e-book, Hope in Progress: 27 Entrepreneurs Who Inspired Me During the Great Recession.

This is a goal that I just didn’t get to this month. Moving to August list.

August Goals:
1.) Kick off my viral, guerrilla, and social media marketing class at LIM College

2.) Make a decision on my apartment lease renewal. I’m thinking about a possible move to Brooklyn and doing some research before I notify my current landlord one way or the other.

3.) Make some headway on my out-of-school education project, Innovation Station. I recently made some valuable partner contacts to keep this idea moving as we head into the school year.

4.) Do some marketing of my e-book. (From July’s goals.)

That seems like a good list to round out the summer. I hoped the summer would have more relaxation time, though life doesn’t always toss us what we hope to have. My 2010 so far involved holding on and enjoying the ride as much as I can. I expect the next 5 months to take the same course.

childhood, children, comedy, television

Step 212: 4 Things That Made Me Laugh This Week

Christa Avampato

As a kid, I loved the movie Mary Poppins. I still do. The scene of Uncle Albert and Bert on the ceiling (played brilliantly by Ed Wynn and Dick Van Dyke, respectively) brings a smile to my face every time I think of it. Imagine the energy of laughter so strong that we literally rise up to the ceiling. Can laughter make us fly, at least figuratively? I think so.

This week ended up as one filled with laughter, some true funny ha-ha laughter, some laughing at dumb luck, and some of the shaking head, “I can’t believe this is happening” variety. None of it literally got me to the ceiling, though on several occasions I doubled over and my face hurt. I consider that a week well-lived.

1.) The Del Close improv marathon. My pal, Amanda, scored us some tix and a rockin’ place in line to see The Colbert Report writers perform. Though they stated clearly that they are writers, no performers, I found them hilarious. (During the days of George Bush, I used The Daily Show and The Colbert Report as my daily dose of news. I chalk it up to survival instinct.) The Del Close Marathon runs this entire weekend with a slew of shows nearly round-the-clock. Check out the schedule and pricing here.

2.) Comedy in marketing. I snapped the photo above outside of The Plant Shed, a store in my neighborhood. According to the sign, customers received a hug with every purchase. True statement? No idea, but it made me laugh. A course in comedy should be required for every marketer. Johanna, one of my yoga teachers, uses comedy in her classes all of the time because when people laugh, they breathe. And we all need to breathe, whether passing by a store, taking a yoga class, or just getting through our daily lives. Yes, sex sells. I would wager that comedy sells more.

3.) Kids say and do the darndest things. My niece, Lorelei, cracks me up on a regular basis. One of her favorite games is to have someone cover her up with a blanket and then wander around saying out loud, “Where’s Lorelei?” Then she jumps up from under the covers and you must pretend that she surprised you. I have no idea why we found this so funny, but we rolled around laughing about it for many hours and the game never got old. Spend more time with kids and you’ll laugh more often.

4.) Phineas and Ferb. I am a great believer in cartoons. I can be found in apartment watching them on a regular basis. I grew up on the Muppets, and I classify smart comedic writing for children that also amuses adults as high art. (I took a comedic writing class at UCB about two years ago. I was awful – I’ve never had to work so hard to write something decent. Out of 8 sketches, only 2 were even passable.) Comedy is hard. Smart comedy is a rare gift. Smart comedy for children that makes adult laugh is rarer still. Thanks to my brother-in-law and niece, Phineas and Ferb are my latest animated obsession. They must have a movie coming out – this kind of comedy cannot stay confined to the small screen. I watch every 20 minute episode laughing out loud. They are two brothers (with a pet platypus named Perry) who dream up crazy day-long stunts to keep themselves occupied and experimenting over summer vacation. They are wicked smart with big hearts. They believe the sky’s the limit. You should too because, well, it is.

That kept me amused all week. I didn’t get to the ceiling, but I’m not ruling it out as a long-term goal. What’s got you giggling lately?

change, creativity, feelings

Step 211: 5 Ways to Improve Concentration

Christa Avampato

“Through meditation and by giving full attention to one thing at a time, we can learn to direct attention where we choose.” ~ Eknath Easwaran

A lot of people want our attention. Take a walk stroll through Times Square without any sense of urgency, and your mind will start spinning with the dizzying number of companies and brands who ask us to pay attention to them amid the chaos. In New York City, distraction takes up residence in every nook and cranny. We spend a lot of energy and time just trying to focus. I’m sure residents of other cities have the same challenge. Not an impossible task, though certainly a difficult one.

The list below details 5 things that help me focus amid the turbulence of New York. I first moved to New York at 22, left, came back, didn’t last long, left, and came back again. In this 3rd stretch, I have lived here for over 3 years – a personal record of staying put in one city. Recently, the winds of wander have come knocking. While in Florida on vacation, I actually contemplated packing it all up (especially since I no longer have that many belongings), and heading for new pastures, even if not necessarily greener ones. Then the Universe, did a funny thing – it made it very difficult for me to physically get home from vacation. Absence, even short and fleeting, always makes me long for New York. The Universe has a deep wisdom and a wicked sense of humor.

5 ways I stay focused here in New York:

1.) Yoga helps. Really. I have a bias here because I am a yoga instructor. Though I got into yoga to reduce stress and anxiety. It gave me the lovely and unexpected side effects of increased creativity and the extremely ability to focus when needed. I don’t use yoga, nor do I teach yoga, to help someone balance all of their weight on their pinky while up in some crazy balance pose. I use it to decompress, and that works for me.

2.) Meditation helps, too. I hated meditation for a long time. I actually thought the whole idea of it bore a striking resemblance to The Emperor’s New Clothes. I spent many years as a critic of meditation without ever giving it a fair shake. Then with my yoga teacher training, I had to have a daily meditation practice as part of the program. Even for just 5 minutes. That regular practice did the trick. Now I have a meditation buddy from my yoga training – we don’t meditate together. We just check in with one another each week to keep one another on the meditation path. No I actually feel the effects of meditation, even during moment of increased stress. It taught me how to calm down and gave me a pathway to a peaceful, restful mind.

3.) Choose your neighborhood wisely. I live on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. People ask me why and my answer never wavers. I like to go to crazy, but I don’t want to live in. There are far cooler, more happenin’ neighborhoods, no doubt. The restaurants in my neighborhood are decent, I have a Whole Foods and a branch of the public library around the corner, and live very close to two huge parks. That meets my requirements. I also live alone on a high floor and have some outdoor space in a quiet building. Those two things remind me just how lucky I am to live where I live. Crazy lives a short cab or subway ride away – good enough for me.

4.) And choose your friends even more wisely. About a year ago, I gave up on negative people. I had a lot of them in my life. People who never get to happy and cannot be happy for others. I serve as blood-in-the-water to those types of people because I have an extraordinary flair for listening to hard luck cases that want no help or improvement. Now I focus my time on those people in my life who give me more energy than they take, people who create and dream and grow. It had made a world of difference.

5.) Get a coach or therapist. The old joke goes that everyone in New York goes to therapy because we are all extraordinarily screwed up. Truthfully, everyone, everywhere can benefit from therapy. We all have issues and challenges and an unbiased opinion really, really helps. I see a social worker who acts more as a life coach than a therapist. If you want his name, I will gladly referred you. He helped me to gain more confidence and pursue a life that excites me. I also recently interviewed Will Meyerhofer, a lawyer turned therapist, for an upcoming freelance piece. He works on a sliding scale and has oodles of integrity and talent. Check him out at http://www.aquietroom.com/.

What did I miss? What helps you stay sane in this crazy world?