Category: animals

animals, dogs, love, pets

Beautiful: Why Dogs Don’t Live as Long as People

Christa Avampato

484838_275297089262931_1160384473_nGiven my deep love for dogs (especially my little guy, Phin), a friend of mine sent me this story. My friend doesn’t know the author and I searched online to no avail. It’s a beautiful story about a veterinarian and an amazing little boy as he confronts losing his faithful pup, Belker.

“Why Dogs Don’t Live as Long as People. Answer of a 6-Year-Old.”

Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old Irish Wolfhound named Belker. The dog’s owners, Ron, his wife Lisa, and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and they were hoping for a miracle.

I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the family we couldn’t do anything for Belker, and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home.

As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would be good for six-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. They felt as though Shane might learn something from the experience.

The next day, I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker ‘s family surrounded him. Shane seemed so calm, petting the old dog for the last time, that I wondered if he understood what was going on. Within a few minutes, Belker slipped peacefully away.

The little boy seemed to accept Belker’s transition without any difficulty or confusion. We sat together for a while after Belker’s death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives.

Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, ”I know why.”

Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me. I’d never heard a more comforting explanation. It has changed the way I try and live.

He said,”People are born so that they can learn how to live a good life — like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?” The 6-year-old continued,

”Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don’t have to stay as long.”

Live simply.

Love generously.

Care deeply.

Speak kindly.

Remember, if a dog was the teacher you would learn things like:

When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.

Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.

Take naps.

Stretch before rising.

Run, romp, and play daily.

Thrive on attention and let people touch you.

Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.

On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.

On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.

When you’re happy, dance around and wag your entire body.

Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.

Be loyal.

Never pretend to be something you’re not.

If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.

When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently.

Enjoy every moment of every day!”

animals, decision-making, dogs, loss, love, pets

Leap: Do What’s Needed

Christa Avampato
My mom snapped this picture of Phin and I about 10 minutes after we met. It was our first picture together and love at first sight.
My mom snapped this picture of Phin and I about 10 minutes after we met. It was our first picture together and love at first sight.

I’ve often written on this blog about my favorite happy, fuzzy pal, Phin. He is an amazing dog whom I rescued over two years ago from the Humane Society. While mostly perfect out of the box, he has struggled with separation anxiety off and on.

His latest bout has lasted for 3 months and I have tried many remedies from extra sessions with our trainer to medication. And just when it seems he has turned a corner, he is plunged back down into the depths of anxiety. His anxiety has begun to make him sick. He never touches a thing in the apartment; he just cries when I leave for any amount of time – an awful, sad, lonely cry. My neighbors are complaining every day. Despite all of the time I spend with him, he needs a home that has more companionship than what I can offer him as a single, working person.

My beautiful, kind, gracious, dog-loving mother has offered to take Phin into her home in Florida until I figure out a better living situation that will work for him. We now live in a tiny studio in a noisy city. My mom and stepfather are retired and are around most of the time. They have a beautiful home with a screened-in porch and a backyard with grass and a garden. They have plenty of sunshine and warmth, inside and outside their home.

Though I know that this is the best short-term situation for Phineas, I am completely heart-broken. He is my constant companion and a champion snuggler. No matter how tough a day I have, he is always there for me with a waggly tail and plenty of smooches. He thinks I am the best person on Earth.

I’m not sure what these next few months hold. I’ll bring Phin down to Florida on Tuesday when I visit my family for the holidays and if all goes well, he’ll be taking up residence there while I sort out a more conducive (read: quiet) environment for him. It is an awful decision to make. My eyes are puffy, my nose is runny, and I feel like a failure.

Life is like that sometimes. We have to make decisions that hurt. Despite our best efforts, things don’t always go the way that we hope they will. I just keep reminding myself to trust the process, to understand that everything is temporary, that fortune can be reversed, that light can and will return even though we are surrounded by darkness. I know this is the best decision to make in the current circumstances, but it’s not easy and it certainly doesn’t feel good.

animals, dogs, learning, meditation, teaching, yoga

Leap: My Dog as My Teacher and Healer

Christa Avampato

Buddhists believe that when the student is ready, the teacher will appear.

Native Americans believe that when a soul comes into our lives it is because it has something to teach us and when we lose someone close to us it is a signal we learned all we could from them.

I believe in both philosophies.

A year ago, my dog, Phineas, came into my life unexpectedly. He was found in the woods, abandoned by his owner and starving. He is perfectly trained in every way except one – he has horrible separation anxiety. He isn’t destructive in any physical way – he just cries a lot when I leave the apartment. He will go long stretches of time without making a peep when I leave, but then goes through terrible spurts of discomfort and stress.

On Saturday, I enlisted the help of a trainer through the company Barkbusters. Though pricier than other trainers, I chose them because they specialize in separation anxiety and they come with a lifetime guarantee. Yes, you read that correctly. A lifetime guarantee – they will return as often as I need them to for the remainder of Phineas’s life and help with any behavior challenge we may have wherever we may live. And my trainer is available at any time, day or night, by email or phone. A worthwhile investment. My only wish is that I had found them sooner, though finding them now, at this point in my own healing journey, brought home a very important realization that only now can I understand and appreciate.

I thought Phineas’s anxiety was from the fear that once I left I may never come back. And while that’s the base fear, here’s the nuance that our trainer taught me: Phineas isn’t worried for himself; he’s worried for me.

He’s on security detail and as such, he feels that he needs to protect me and keep me safe so that way I can continue to take care of him. When I go out into the big, scary world, he’s worried I will be harmed because he isn’t there to protect me. He has no way to control the situation and that lack of control mixed with fear is causing his anxiety. He’s taken on the job of being my body-guard and it’s not a role he is equipped for, nor a burden he should be responsible to bear. He hates this job, but he thinks it’s the only way he can assure that he won’t be abandoned again.

Isn’t that wild?!

Not really. I understand that feeling all too well. Dogs and children process information in such a similar way.

When I was a very young child, I was very aware that my father would never be able to take care of me. I knew that my mother was the only one in our household equipped to take care of me until I got big enough to take of myself. I worried constantly that something terrible would happen to my mother and that I’d be left with my father, which effectively meant I’d be on my own to take care of myself before I was ready.

It was a horrible burden to bear – I developed insomnia, headaches, and intense stress. I did my very best to compensate and cope, but as a young child there was no way for me to logically process my fears. I didn’t have the skills to do that. So I worked very hard in school because I linked doing well in school with getting a good job that would give me the income to provide for myself. I fought very hard to become as independent as possible as soon as I could. And while to the outside world I was a wonderfully adapted and well-adjusted child, I would argue that this adaptation and adjustment came at a very dear price. A price I still pay though am now able to articulate, understand, and repay as I heal. My yoga and meditation practices went a long toward than end. They still do.

Phineas and I are in the same boat – different cause, same effect. And if I can help him heal, really heal on a very deep level, then that will go a very long way toward healing my own inner child who still worries that she’ll be abandoned and still struggles to believe that I will always be able to take care of myself. Truly believing this last piece is the key to the confidence it takes to leap into entrepreneurship. Phineas was part of the Universe’s great plan for me and my work.

I thought by adopting Phineas that I was changing his life, and I certainly am doing just that. But he’s also changing mine, far more than he knows. As I watch him at this very moment sleeping peacefully in his bed, I’m even more determined to help him if for no other reason than to thank him for his soul’s incredible sacrifice for the sake of my soul’s healing.

Cesar Millan is famous for saying that he rehabilitates dogs and he trains people. This is certainly the case for me and for Phin. The calmer and more confident I can become through my own yoga and mediation practice, the more I can help him. And his healing will speed my healing. It’s a virtuous cycle that I am finally ready to begin.

animals, eating, food, nature, work

Beginning: Be Here Like a Duck in the Ocean

Christa Avampato

“The little duck is at ease in the heaving Atlantic because it is in the Atlantic. Rest in the immediate as though it were infinity.” – Edward Espe Brown, Buddhist monk , chef, and star of the documentary How to Cook Your Life, reading from a poem written by his mother as she was preparing for the end of her life

The kitchen holds an abundance of wisdom and life lessons if we choose to show up in it day after day with an open mind and heart. As I have recommitted to cooking more and teaching myself to bake, I find myself growing more and more present in my own life, in and out of the kitchen. I have long thought of myself as a recovering multi-tasker, trying again and again to foster a life of consciousness and presence. Too often this is the moment we miss, and knowing the preciousness and fleeting nature of life, I don’t want to miss any more moments.

I also try to be conscious of when I am fighting life, when I am plotting, planning, and charting my actions toward a specific outcome with little regard for present circumstances. I don’t believe in the road of least resistance. Every road has its hardships, every path its detours, and every life its suffering. I have never actually felt the easy way break open as some people have. Everything I’ve ever done has taken effort so I am quite used to and comfortable with work that feels like work. I’ve grown to enjoy it so long as it’s work that feels worth my time.

As for the little duck in the ocean, he is not just bobbing along carefree. Beneath the surface of the ocean, his little duck feet and legs are churning. Rather than having his efforts fight the ocean, they are working in tandem to the rhythm. It still takes energy and effort and attention. He isn’t floating along; he’s paddling and taking his directional cue from the ocean. He’s present and realizes the awesomeness of the ocean’s power. He channels that power in his own work below the surface. He is there, in that moment, and nowhere else. I try to follow his example.

animals, dogs

Beginning: Phineas and I Share Our Adoption Story with “From Alone to Home”

Christa Avampato

My mom snapped this picture of Phin & I about 10 minutes after we met. It was our first picture together.
From Alone to Home is a site lovingly curated by Kate Antoniades that promote pet adoption. Kate reached out to me last week after reading about Phineas and asked if I’d share our adoption story. Of course I jumped at the chance and the post is now up on Kate’s site. Click here to read our story.

Also, if you have adopted a pet and would like to share your story on From Alone to Home, please email Kate.

animals, books, dogs, story, writing, yoga

Beginning: Until Tuesday: A Wounded Warrior and the Golden Retriever Who Saved Him

Christa Avampato

“I want to stand as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all kinds of things you can’t see from the center.” ~ Kurt Vonnegut as quoted by Fmr. Captain Luis Carlos Montalván

I have read a handful of books in my life that have reached down into my soul and taken root. Fmr. Captain Luis Carlos Montalván’s book, Until Tuesday: A Wounded Warrior and the Golden Retriever Who Saved Him, is one of those books. Exquisitely written, Montalván and his beloved service dog, Tuesday, made me laugh, cry, and slam my fists on the table. I read much of it with Phineas, my own canine pal, in my lap, and the book made me hug Phineas even tighter than I usually do.

I  picked up the book after seeing Montalván and Tuesday on Letterman. I usually miss the show because it’s on past my bedtime, but for some reason I was awake that night with the TV on. Montalván’s story is tremendously important to me on a number of levels, and so immediately went out the next day and got the book.

Helping returning vets
With Compass Yoga, I am very focused on helping returning veterans, their families, and caregivers. Montalván taught me so much about war and the toll it takes on a person. His story is at points devastating and my heart felt crushed for all he endured, in Iraq and then once he returned from his tours of duty. The challenges of vets and those who are care for them are complex and messy, and Montalván writes about them in such searing detail that I sometimes felt myself right beside him. It’s a situation I very much need to understand if I am going to be of service to vets when they return home. The book reaffirmed my commitment to them.

Championing the healing power of animals
Tuesday is clearly an exquisite animal, inside and out. Though I’ve never met him, I certainly fell in love with him and his story over the course of the 252-page book. I have been a dog lover all my life. Our family dogs were an enormous part of my childhood – the very best part of it. I adopted my rescue pup, Phineas, a year ago and rehabilitating him has been one of the proudest and happiest achievement of my life. Even on my saddest days, he is a little ray of light in my life and to everyone who meets him. He is not without his challenges, though he has now become so engrained in my life that I can’t imagine being without him. That is the magic of animals, and dogs in particular – just by showing up they teach us about commitment, devotion, love, loyalty, and empathy – all of the things that make us human. They bring out the very best in all of us. I decided to enroll us in therapy dog training this Fall so I can bring him to schools and hospitals to visit. Goodness like Phin’s needs to be shared with the world – Tuesday taught me that.We need more Tuesdays, especially for veterans.

Writing honestly to achieve understanding
Montalván is a master storyteller, and what I so respect and admire most about him is his ability to write so candidly about painful and joyful parts of his life. It took great courage to put pen to page to write this story. He is not a perfect man, and in his honest writing he teaches us that we can’t expect ourselves to be perfect either. He writes about forgiveness and authenticity. He speaks with confidence, grace, wisdom, and strength. He inspired me to continue my own personal writing, particularly about my father, which is a painful and tragic part of my past. Montalván taught me that there is so much redemption available to us through honest and thoughtful writing. He taught me just how mighty the pen can be, and just how capable we are of forgiving ourselves and others.

Until Tuesday is a truly beautiful book, a great gift that I am so grateful to receive. And so I pass the recommendation on to you – let Tuesday into your heart and he will change the way you see the world.

animals, dogs, learning

Beginning: Phin & I Continue Our Work on Separation Anxiety

Christa Avampato

Phin practices his best "stay"
Phin and I attended our second semi-annual gathering of dachshunds at Washington Square Park. The event is put on the last Saturday in April and the first Saturday in October by the Dachshund Friendship Circle. I’m sure that parents of other breeds are equally passionate about their pups, though I’ve never seen people go ga-ga over their canine pals as much as dachshund owners do. It’s also a great place to get support and advice about the breed, which I have needed in abundance.

The way of the dachshund
They are a temperamental breed to be sure. They are born with plenty of personality despite their small stature and with that can come a lot of anxiousness. Over the past weeks Phin has had some trouble with separation anxiety. He doesn’t destroy anything in the house; he just barks a lot when I leave. It is something that he wrestles with on and off, and though he’s mostly settled in now to our home (I’ve had him for almost 8 months) on occasion he still has some tough days. Most of my neighbors are dog owners and are very supportive. One is not, and is quite vocal about it. Though I’ve apologized profusely in the past for any disturbance Phin causes from time to time, she never lets up. He sneezes and I get a text message about it – so much so that I finally blocked her from being able to text or call me. Thankfully she’s moving in a few short months.

A tough week leads to further action
I knew Phin was safe in the apartment. I just didn’t know how to get him through his latest spell of separation anxiety, which is the hardest behavior to help a dog get past. At the last Dachshund Festival we met Gregg Karl, who is a professional dog trainer who specializes in dachshunds. (He has 2 of his own). He’s become a friend and invaluable resource over the last few months. On Tuesday I gave him a call because I was really worried about Phin’s latest bout of anxiety. To be fair, we’ve had painters in our hallways all week and we went out of town over the weekend, two things that certainly set off Phin’s anxiety. Still, he seemed more anxious than he would normally be even under these stressful circumstances.

Gregg Karl, our dog trainer, comes to the rescue
Gregg was full of tips including:

– A toy called a Buster Cube and Zuke’s treats to keep him busy.

– He also had me start teaching Phin the “Stay” command and practicing coming and going out of the house many, many times. “Stay” he mastered beautifully. The coming and going exercise is not so easy. I noticed Phin’s anxiety has increased over the week after we began the training and panicked a little. Gregg assured me that this is also extremely normal. Once they begin formal training, almost all dogs will be confused and anxious until they learn that the training is no big deal. Phin is only at the very early stages.

Friends Trish and Janet lend a hand, too
My friend, Trish, an animal behaviorist, recommended that I try lavender spray to calm him down and give the apartment a relaxed feel. That seemed to help some, too. My friend, Janet, another one of my dog whisperers, recommended mixing up Phin’s walking routing to stimulate his mind and taking him for short trips around the city (like the one to the dachshund festival!) to help ease any anxiety he has after a trip. That also seemed to help him this week. I’m so grateful for their advice!

Up the exercise
I gave up running a few years ago as my yoga practice deepened. I need to have these knees of mine as long as possible and running seemed to be wearing on them. This was a big change for me as I used to run regularly and in 2001 ran the Chicago marathon. Now that the weather is getting nicer (finally!), I’ve noticed Phin has much more energy and a walk does not tire him out. One of the best remedies to separation anxiety is to exercise a dog so that he is very tired every time you leave. With all of his anxious energy gone, you’ll walk out the door and he’ll go to sleep. So, it’s back to running with Phin as my running buddy. So far this fix has worked beautifully. He loves the run and is thoroughly exhausted by the time we get home. It’s good for my health to get some more cardio and it’s good for Phin, too. Win-win.

More company
I was previously scheduling my dog walker to just take him in the middle of the day when I couldn’t get home right after work. Now, I’ve asked her to come by every day I go to work no matter what time I’ll be home. This gets him used to being with someone else who cares for him more often and he gets to see his canine pals more often which always has a very pacifying affect on him.

A new vet helps us, too
I’ve been rather unhappy with our vet. He doesn’t have much of a bedside manner and Phin is a special dog with special issues and we need a vet who understands that. In the park I met several people who recommended Westside Veterinary Clinic and we went to see them last weekend. Dr. Lewis was very happy to hear about Gregg’s tips, and she suggested that while he’s getting through this latest bout it may be a good idea to put him on a very, very low dose medicine to help ease the anxiety. I was worried about taking this step though I have to say that Phin is much calmer with the medicine and his quality of life is much higher. Plus, the dose is so low that he hasn’t lost any of his personality. The medicine cuts the anxiety without inducing any other side effects.

It takes a village to raise a dachshund
Gregg, Janet, Trish, my dog walker, and my vet continue to assure me that getting a dog through separation anxiety requires confidence and patience in boatloads. They promised me that Phin would come around, and eventually would become a well-adjusted, relaxed pup no matter what circumstances he’s in. Trauma reveals itself in stages, whether we’re talking about trauma in people or in animals.

It feels more like I’m raising a dog than training a dog, and I’ve learned so much along this road. Thank goodness for my village of advisors. No matter how much I want to speed through the process, I remind myself that in every phase of this journey Phin and I have much to learn, and we’ll both be better off for it.

animals, dogs, New York

Beginning: Ringing in Spring at the New York Dachshund Spring Fiesta

Christa Avampato

Phin and I went to the semi-annual NY Dachshund Spring Fiesta yesterday. By 1:30, Washington Square park was filled with hundreds of dachshunds and their parents were enjoying the sunshine, warmth, and fun. Dachshunds are a funny breed because they really do seem to know when they are among other dachshunds. It’s a place to share stories, get advice, and generally tell one another how much we adore this breed.

The event is held the last Saturday of every April and the first Saturday of every October. Only in New York City do you find these kinds of off-the-wall events and hundreds of people who diligently mark their calendars to attend every time. What’s more, there were plenty of people who don’t have dachshunds and come out just to take a look at all of the varied examples of this special pup.

I had to share some pictures with you, the lyrics of the Dachs Song (yes, they have their own anthem!), as well as my favorite quotes of the day. Enjoy, and join me in October! Phin will be glad to introduce you around.

My Favorite Quotes:
“This is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen.”

“No, we don’t have a dog. We’re just here to have a great time with everyone else’s wiener.”

“There’s no way you can keep a dachsie down. You can’t put baby in a corner.”

Lyrics and melody to the Dachs Song
Paul de Vries, Adrian Milton, & Murray Weinstock

To hear the Dachs Song, visit http://www.dachsong.com/

“There’s no other dog like a dachshund,
walking to close to the ground.
They’re stubborn and sly as a fox
and the happiest pet to be found.

Most kinds of dogs seem to either have
shapes or proportions all wrong.
They’re only one way or the other,
but dachshunds are both short and long.

Dachsie, meine dachsie,
the best canine under the sun.
Call you wiener or sausage or hot dog,
We know that you’re number 1.”

Photos

A dachsie pow wow

Shotzie, our trainer Gregg's pup
A dachsie on his wiener leash
A pup who is half dachshie, half rottweiler
Phin takes a break and listens to some toons after meeting so many new friends
animals, dogs, love

Beginning: What Animals Teach Us About Love

Christa Avampato

Phineas with the cherry blossoms in Central Park
“It’s no trick loving somebody at their best. Love is loving them at their worst.” ~ Tom Stoppard

Phineas and I had our first fight. Last week he had one day when he didn’t want to go outside, didn’t want to go back inside once we finally got to our walk, didn’t want to go back into our apartment, and then didn’t want me to leave for work. He howled and howled when I left. And not his “I’m sad; don’t leave me” cry” but his “I am so mad at you for leaving me” cry. This was completely unlike Phin. He’s never done that before. the few days prior he did seem to be having some nightmares, and would whimper a little bit in the middle of the night. I should also mention that this same morning both the elevators in my building were clogged due to a movie filming in our building (we live on the 17th floor!), and Phin could hear every single clang of the movie equipment from our apartment. (If they’re going to inconvenience us, the least the producers could do is put us in the movie.) Oy! What a Monday!

I tried everything I could to calm Phin down and nothing, absolutely nothing worked, so I ended up just having to leave with him angry at me. And I was mad at him, too. A grown 35 year old woman angry at a 15 pound, 18 month old dachshund. Now looking back on it, my anger was pretty hilarious. How was Phineas supposed to understand that a movie was filming and he would just have to contend with the noise? At the time it was awful.

In my mind I know Phin was just fine. He had his food and water, his treats, his nice warm bed as well as my nice warm bed if he wanted it. The TV was on and his dog walker was scheduled to take him out later in the afternoon. Still, my heart was sick at work. So sick that I asked the dog walker to send me a text after their walk to let me know if he seemed okay. Chalk it up to still being a beginning full-time dog owner. How do parents manage to their crying children at daycare? A howling dachshund is about all I can manage.

I hate to say this but a small part of my dreaded going home that night. What if Phineas gave me the silent treatment? Maybe I’m a terrible dog parent. What if he didn’t have just a bad morning but this was a turning point in his personality?

Phineas’s walk with the dog walker went well and when I got home he was overjoyed to see me, just like always. We went for a walk, had some dinner, and then he snuggled up next to me on the couch and promptly put himself to bed early. He was just fine. We were just fine. It was just an off morning and nothing more.

Phineas and I learned a valuable thing about love and co-habitation. Eventually, we have to go home and sort out our differences with the beings whom we love. We have to keep showing up. The love and companionship trump any difficulties that may surface along the way. When you love someone, you love regardless of their mood. And yes you’ll get mad and they’ll get mad, but it can and should be forgiven. Tom Stoppard was right – real love means loving them just as they are, Monday morning or not.

animals, dogs, yoga

Beginning: Yoga Dogs

Christa Avampato

I’ve often thought that dogs were the original yogis. Not only are certain basic postures named for these zen creatures, but just living with and observing a dog on a daily basis reminds us that they really are some of our very best gurus, on and off the mat. Just for fun today, take a look at this slide show for proof that dogs and yoga were made for each other! Just one more item on the long list of things we can learn from our beloved canines.

Want to really test the link between your pooch and the ancient practice? Check out the Doga (Dog yoga) event on April 14th at 7pm with instructors Amy Tobin and Laura Barket at Bideawee.

Happy weekend!

Being the owner of a dachshund, I had to make the image above the headliner for this post. Pictured is Yogi Rocky Barkjan, the original Hundalini Yoga Dog master. Clearly he’s a wire haired dachshund, just like Phin!