I tell wonder-filled stories about hope and healing
Author: Christa Avampato
The short of it:
Writer. Health, education, and art advocate. Theater and film producer. Visual artist. Product geek. Proud alumnae of the University of Pennsylvania (BA) and the Darden School of Business at the University of Virginia (MBA). Inspired by ancient wisdom & modern tech. Proliferator of goodness. Opener of doors. Friend to animals. Fan of creative work in all its wondrous forms. I use my business skills to create passion projects that build a better world. I’ve been called the happiest New Yorker, and I try hard to live up to that title every day.
The long of it:
My career has stretched across Capitol Hill, Broadway theatre, education, nonprofit fundraising, health and wellness, and Fortune 500 companies in retail, media, entertainment, technology, and financial services. I’ve been a product developer and product manager, theater manager, strategic consultant, marketer, voice over artist, , teacher, and fundraiser. I use my business and storytelling to support and sustain passion projects that build a better world. In every experience, I’ve used my sense of and respect for elegant design to develop meaningful products, services, programs, and events.
While building a business career, I also built a strong portfolio as a journalist, novelist, freelance writer, interviewer, presenter, and public speaker. My writing has appeared in The Washington Post, The Huffington Post, PBS.org, Boston.com, Royal Media Partners publications, and The Motley Fool on a wide range of topics including business, technology, science, health, education, culture, and lifestyle. I have also been an invited speaker at SXSW, Teach for America, Avon headquarters, Games for Change, NYU, Columbia University, Hunter College, and the Alzheimer’s Foundation of America. The first book in my young adult book series, Emerson Page and Where the Light Enters, was acquired by a publisher and launched in November 2017. I’m currently working on the second book in the series.
A recovering multi-tasker, I’m equally at home in front of my Mac, on my yoga mat, walking my rescue dog, Phineas, traveling with a purpose, or practicing the high-art of people watching. I also cut up small bits of paper and put them back together as a collage artist.
My company:
I’m bringing together all of my business and creative career paths as the Founder of Double or Nothing Media:
• I craft products, programs, and projects that make a difference;
• I build the business plans that make what I craft financially sustainable;
• I tell the stories that matter about the people, places, and products that inspire me.
Follow my adventures on Twitter at https://twitter.com/christanyc and Instagram at https://instagram.com/christarosenyc.
My friend, Amanda, posted this up on her Facebook page and I love it so much that I wanted to share it as today’s post. It gets at all of my beliefs about passion, finding our life’s work, love, travel, and the passing of time.
This week on vacation, I’m spending loads of time with my nieces, Lorelei and Aubree. I try to visit them every 3 to 4 months. At 3 years old and 1 year old, I am conscious of how different they are every time I see them. People always say kids grow up so fast, though I never knew how fast until these two little ones came along. They are two more reminders of just how important it is to live the lives we want, by our own design and on our own terms. Life is just too fleeting to do anything else.
Too many people I meet are content to be just where they are, even if it’s nowhere they’d like to be. I used to envy how content they could be as I would drive myself close to the brink with my striving. Now that I see all of the benefits I’m creating in my own life, thanks in large part to my striving for so many years, I’m so grateful that I can only settle for what I really want rather than settling for what just seems readily available.
Many years ago I had a conversation with my friend, Amy, about our dreams to build our own roads, not just take the well-traveled ones. We agreed that it was as much fun to carve our own paths with our own hands as it was to get to the destinations we wanted to reach.
It’s in the doing that we really learn who we are and just who we’re meant to be.
Photo credit: Alison Grippo“Everything that is really great and inspiring is created by the individual who can labor in freedom.” ~ Albert Einstein
Holidays like July 4th are a good time for reflection. On your way to the beach, the barbecue, and the fireworks today, it’s well worth a moment of our time to think about why we even have this holiday: a group of people got together and decided that they needed to live free or die trying. It’s a powerful ideal, and not one that should in any way dampen out spirits but rather buoy them up.
Today my mind, heart, and gratitude are with the many people who are overseas making so many sacrifices on our behalf so that we may live free. In their honor, I’m spending some time today to consider what one principle I would stake my life on. What ideal makes me feel so alive that I’d be willing to lay down my life for it? Once we can answer that question, then so much of our life comes in to focus. We know where to spend our time and energy. We know which kinds of people to surround ourselves with. Our legacy becomes clear.
On the 4th of July I’m thankful that my freedom was so important to so many people whom I will never have the pleasure to meet. Making the most of my freedom is the best way to honor them. Our lives are their legacy. Happy 4th!
<a “Something has always come along to shake things up just when I am feeling settled. Maybe this is the fate of a striver, someone always trying to be ‘twice as good’.” ~ Condoleezza Rice
A few months ago I read the book Extraordinary, Ordinary People by Condoleezza Rice. It tells her own personal story prior to her very public life by paying tribute to her parents. Despite the fact that I was confused by nearly every foreign policy call she made while servicing in President Bush’s administration, I was enormously impressed by her personal story and the candor with which she told it. She’s also an incredibly likeable person.
Shake it up, baby
Of all the sound bites in the book, this one about the life of a striver has stuck with me. I regularly go through this same roller coaster. Just when I think I’m settled and I’ve got it all figured out, my reality gets turned on its head. This has happened to me enough times that I have learned to just roll with changes, big and small. And while this constant change may appear unsettling on the surface in actuality it’s made me so grateful. Because I know that everything will change, I appreciate each moment, good or bad, more fully. I’m reminded of my mother’s mantra, “This too shall pass.” Everything passes.
On disappointment
Another happy side effect of the acceptance of change is that disappointment has less of a sting. My friend, Sara, recently asked me how I manage to work on so many projects at once. For better or worse, I was raised to be productive. My father’s one ask of us is that we never do anything to embarrass him; ironic given all the times he embarrassed us. Still, that stuck with me and to me meant that if I attempted to do anything it had better be done well. It was made very clear to us that we are here on borrowed time and that we were expected to make a contribution to humanity.
My father’s life was tragically cut short at age 61 with most of his life’s work left unfinished. The lesson of how fleeting life is sticks with me; I think about it every day. The most enlightened point-of-view of this lesson is that I have very little time to feel badly about disappointment. I have to pick myself up, dust myself off, and start all over again. In many ways, to keep going is the only way I know to deal with disappointment.
A belief in karma
I’m a walking contradiction, and truth be told I like it that way. A big believer in free will, I’m also just as passionate about the concept of destiny, karma, and a predetermined path. One of my favorite quotes came from Steve Jobs when he told a group of graduates that life could only be understood in reverse because it’s only in reverse that all of the seemingly disparate pieces of our lives fit together. As I work on the direction of Compass Yoga, I realize why I need all of my life experiences, good and bad, big and small.
Welcome, Change!
In an effort to make all of these experiences worthwhile, to make them mean something in the grand scheme of life, I’m glad to put myself in the camp of strivers. In the end I want to be able to look back on my long life and realize that it was twice as good as I ever thought it would be. This is a tall order given that I have very high expectations. And if change is the linchpin that makes that dream possible, then I welcome it with open arms and often.
I arrived in Florida yesterday after a too-long flight and after too many months without a vacation. I didn’t realize just how tired I was until I was on the bus to the airport. I felt out of balance; the past few months have been emotional and my schedule has been packed to the gills. It’s time to decompress and release.
The long and winding road
The labyrinth back to balance that Dr. Bhaswati speaks about hit me full force once we were airborne. My thoughts were jumbled, and I could feel my body racing despite the fact that I was sitting down. Since my therapeutic yoga teacher training, I’ve been very aware of the effects of the stress response, aka fight or flight, on my body. Stress triggers a number of changes in the body that we can actually feel if we tune into them: our muscles tense, our blood pressure rises, and our digestive system slows down.
In the last few months when I feel these changes kicking in, I stop and breathe as deeply as possible into my belly. It’s been a conscious, constant effort, though entirely worth it. I feel more in tune with the changes my body makes involuntarily in response to stress and I voluntarily make changes to counteract these responses. It is give and take, a long and winding labyrinth.
Stress doesn’t discriminate
We can’t control the initial reactions of our bodies to stress. Much of it is regulated by our sympathetic (involuntary) nervous system and there is a good reason for that. The fight or flight response is meant to keep us safe; however, it’s not meant to be turned on all the time as happens with today’s society of constant stress and so with constant stress we run into big trouble. Our body has only one set of responses to stress – whether our stress is caused by a deadline at work, a traffic jam, or a tiger who’s on our tail. What I’m learning through yoga and meditation is that we have the ability to talk our bodies down off the ledge. We can tell ourselves, “Look, I know you’re freaking out right now, but it really is going to be okay. Just breathe.” That breath – deep into the belly, even inhales and exhales – is our guide, our guru. It takes us up and away from where we feel trapped and scared into a space that feels open and safe.
All I really have to do is breathe?
It sounds so simple, and it really is. When everything else falls away, our breath is always with us. So get some bright-colored paper, grab a sharpy, and write out the simple word “BREATHE” in big, bold letters. Post it around your home, your office, in your wallet, and in your car. Type it up as a to-do in your calendar on your phone and set a reminder every hour or two. Breathe, and find your way back to balance. Let me know how it goes.
“Turn your face toward the sun and the shadows will fall behind you.” – Maori Proverb via Tiny Buddha
Yesterday I expounded upon my love for Daily Good’s daily email that inspires me on a regular basis. Another site that I love for its flat-out joy and love of life is Tiny Buddha. I found my way to Tiny Buddha via MJ, a tremendously loyal and helpful member of the Christa in New York community. Lori Deschene, the creator of Tiny Buddha, is another one of those sources who delivers tidbits of delightfulness to my inbox and always seems to find exactly the right words exactly when I need to hear them. The quote above is an example of that.
The light is closer than we think
This Maori Proverb made me think of a picture of someone looking down at the ground, searching for some positive sign, searching for some kind of light and hope, never realizing that all the light they could ever want is just above them. If only they would take their gaze up, they would be able to find all the signs they could ever ask for. I have a friend like this. She is someone who has been blessed with so many riches, material and otherwise, and yet is never happy. She often says, “I really just need something to go right in my life soon.” What she doesn’t realize is that she has the ability and the power to take her life in the direction she wants to go. Great things aren’t going to happen TO her; they are going to happen when she brings them into being.
A life of light or darkness is often a matter of choice
And this is true for us, too. We can choose to live in the shadows – goodness knows there are enough of them in the world and in our own pasts. We can also choose to acknowledge the shadows for what they have to offer us, take their learnings, and then turn toward the light. Those shadows will stay with us as reminders, as teachers, but they don’t need to hold so much power over us. We can take another road. Once we change our minds, we change everything.
sciencedaily.com“Your task is not to seek love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” ~ Rumi via Daily Good
Daily Good’s post is a part of my every day regiment. The fine folks who run the site put together a poignant, inspiring post every day. It always resonates with me. Their recent post inspired by Rumi’s quote made me start to think differently of how I work to achieve my goals. Is my focus on the goal itself misplaced? Could I actually be more efficient (which I love to be!) if I focused not on the goal itself, but on the barriers that I need to hurdle over to get to the goal.
The 2-inch picture frame
In college, one of my roommates gave me a 2-inch dual picture frame. One one side, I have a picture of a row-boat – it reminds me of the importance of embarking on new journeys. On the other side, I have a picture of a park bench that has two sitting spots clearly worn through the paint – it reminds me of the importance of having companionship along our journeys.
Whenever I have a very large task ahead of me, that 2-inch picture frame reminds me to break the task apart into small pieces. I just need to work on the masterpiece of my life one 2-inch portion at a time, just as a painter or sculptor does. Each piece feeds into the whole, bit by bit.
Playing pool
A number of years ago I dated a guy who was a master pool player. I liked to play pool though I was pretty bad at it. I focused on the cue ball, and not the ball I was trying to send into a pocket of the table. Once he helped me shift my focus to the long-term ball I wanted to sink, my pool playing improved dramatically. In this case it wasn’t the task at hand (hitting the cue ball) that mattered most, but rather what I hoped that task helped to do for me in the long-run (sinking the ball in the pocket.)
Equal amount of attention on the details and on the grand vision
For a long time I thought the focus on short-term and long-term was an either / or decision, and for the most part I focused on the long-term. I don’t think this was a bad choice; it helped me to make some serious short-term trade-offs so that I could reach goals like putting myself through college and through graduate school, both of which yielded huge benefits on my life overall.
The quote by Rumi reminded me that as I take on bigger life goals, such as working on Compass Yoga full-time, making peace with my dad, and finding the guy who is going to be my partner in life, seeking to remove the barriers to my success is a viable and fruitful way to travel down the path.
“When you feel pain, question it. Why is it there and how can we heal it? The body wants to heal.” ~ Cheri Clampett
In the last few weeks, there has been an opening. A pain that’s been hidden, so deep for so long, refused to lay down any longer. It had to bubble up in me so that finally after far too long it could release. The pain asked to be looked at, considered, appreciated, and then, finally forgiven.
This reminded me of something Cheri Clampett said a few weeks ago in the therapeutic yoga teacher training at Integral Yoga Institute. Pain is our friend. It may not feel like it at first brush, but it is there to teach us. You can ignore it, medicate it, and try like heck to forget about it. It will not be dissuaded. Loyally, it will wait for you to be ready, to have the strength to meet it, sit with it, and understand it. That moment has finally arrived for me and my dad. We are ready to forgive, release, and move on.
I have known this pain a long time. In some odd and uncomfortable way, it has become a friend. It’s been my fallback and my excuse for certain circumstances in my life. “I can’t do this because my dad was like that.” And for a while that was true; it’s just not true anymore. I am healed. I am whole. And I can do anything, even if I my dad didn’t he could.
Yesterday, I wrote about my regret that I didn’t go say goodbye to my dad when he was dying. What I didn’t mention is that I was 16 at the time. I didn’t have the tools to look so much pain in the face and not crumble. I needed to grow up before that was possible, and at 16 I wasn’t grown up, not by a long shot, and I couldn’t possibly have been expected to be. It was my dad’s time to go but it wasn’t yet my time to let go. Sometimes life is like that. Sometimes our timing is just off, and in those moments we do the best we can with what we’ve got. We operate with imperfect information all the time.
In the post yesterday I spoke about yesterday lessons, the lessons that our past teaches us so that we can improve going forward. Another yesterday lesson that my father’s passing taught me had to do with forgiveness. That lesson appeared more slowly, over a very long period of time, and in fits and starts: if we’re truly sorry, then pure, true forgiveness will find us. The “I’m sorry” moment starts us down the road to healing of every kind. All we have to do is ask for it. Forgiveness is a life force in and of itself. It changes everything. And if we believe in learning, in growing, in constantly evolving, then we must believe in forgiveness, of others and even more importantly, of ourselves.
In Buddhism there is a belief that every moment provides the exact teaching we need exactly when we need it. There’s no way at 16 that I could have known how deeply it would affect me to not say goodbye to my father. And in some strange, cosmically-correct way, I think the moment came and went exactly as it was supposed to be. I know so deeply that every moment comes to pass this way, and because of this belief, I have to forgive my dad and I have to forgive myself. We were two people who were doing the best we could with what we had. And even though we didn’t get a chance to meet in the middle this time around, in our own ways, in our own now separate worlds, we are both finding our way to forgiveness – of ourselves and of one another.
“If you want to understand today, you have to search yesterday.” ~ Pearl Buck
Searching yesterday is valuable, difficult work. I take it on every day because I believe so fully in the process of continuous improvement. I know and accept that I am not perfect, that I will never be perfect, and that there is always a way to do something better. This strong belief is helping me to make peace with yesterday and to lay down the heavy backpack of perfectionism. Perfection is a losing battle, and I hate losing even more than I hate imperfection.
Even with this strong belief in continuous improvement, some yesterdays have a way of gnawing at me even in my best moments. Not all yesterdays are created equal. I try to be thorough, thoughtful, and well-informed. I am the decision tree queen. I’d be willing to test my pro / con list speed and dexterity against anyone. I’ve been at this game of choice and decision-making for a very long time and for me, it’s an art.
My last yesterday with my father
So it’s sometimes especially difficult when I wish I had handled a situation from yesterday in a better way. I wish I had gone to the hospital and said good-bye to my father when I had the chance. I wish I could have swallowed my pride and my desire to be “right” – it might have saved me a lot of heartache in the aftermath. It’s not that I didn’t say good-bye to my father that bothers me so much; it’s that I made the free-willed choice to not say good-bye. I had good reasons for making that choice, though I wish I could have just laid them aside, whether they were right or wrong, and just been there with my mother to bear witness at the passing of a life that gave me life. It is my greatest and deepest regret, and with the finality of death it is something that I will never be able to do better. I can’t go back and say good-bye to my father in a better way, or for that matter, at all.
Keeping and living the lesson
The night my father died, I lost in a big way. His Holiness the Dalai Lama once said, “When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.” And in every day since my father passed I have tried to retain a very big yesterday lesson: when you walk away understand that you may not be able to retrace your steps.
Sometimes walking away is the best answer. Sometimes the only way you can really help someone heal is to remove yourself from the situation. Be very conscious of the downstream effects – for you and for that person – and understand that your decision in that moment has the ability to entirely alter your course going forward.
You will relive all of your yesterdays every day; act accordingly.
Army soldier in Trikonasana (Triangle Pose) at Fort Hood“The Bhagavad Gita’s subject is the war within, the struggle for self-mastery that every human being must wage if he or she is to emerge from life victorious.” ~ Eknath Easwaran
“We prepare soldiers for war. We train them to kill. Why don’t we also prepare them for peace and train them to stop killing?” ~ Wartorn 1861 – 2010
The quote above is by a mother who was interviewed in the HBO documentary Wartorn 1861 – 2010. 4 weeks after her son returned from Afghanistan, he was arrested for aggravated assault of a taxi driver of Middle Eastern decent. He was sentenced to 6 years in prison and has untreated PTSD, as do 39% of incarcerated vets in our country. “They say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger,” he tells his family the night before his sentencing. “That’s bulls*it because I came back from Afghanistan weaker than I was before.”
It was interesting to watch this film on the heals of talking to a friend of mine about my desire to help veterans and their families through Compass Yoga. “Yoga for veterans? Um, aren’t you trying to offer classes to the population most unlikely to take them? What kind of business plan is that?” It was the first time I ever received this kind of feedback on the idea and it gave me pause. And then I asked myself the question that every entrepreneur asks herself at one point or another: “Am I crazy?”
Yoga-strong
My moment of doubt lasted only a moment but it was a powerful moment. It gave me more objectivity; it helped me to strengthen my story in a more creative and powerful way. There’s a perception that yoga is some kind of hippy dippy practice, that we all decorate our homes with butterflies and unicorns and rainbows, and that its main purpose is to figure out how to tie ourselves into pretzels. The truth is that the practice of yoga has much more in common with the United States Military than we realize, and therefore makes it an ideal complement to soldiers’ training and should be an integral part of their wellness programs when they return home.
The idea of war is an integral part of yogic texts The Bhagavad Gita is a central text for all yogis and many consider it the most important text. It is a small part of the larger Hindu epic, the Mahabharata. I’m re-reading it right now to remind myself all of the wisdom it stores in its 97 short pages. It’s setting is a battlefield likened to Armageddon, and its central characters are Lord Krishna (who also plays the role of guide and charioteer) and Prince Arjuna, a warrior. The Gita is the conversation between Krishna and Arjuna prior to the climatic battle of the Kurukshetra War. Arjuna is plagued by inner moral conflict over going to battle with his own loved ones, even though those loved ones have done horrible things to others, and the potential harm he will inflict on them. Krishna talks him through the conflict, ultimately explaining that the battle Arjuna is about to wage is the manifestation of karmic action, a righteous war for the purpose of justice. At the recent NYS Health Foundation conference I attended, guest speaker Colonel Sutherland explained, “War is vile, but there are things more vile to us: injustice. And that is why we fight.” Krishna concurs.
And this is only one example of war in Vedic texts. There are many others including the epic Ramayana, the story of how a war was fought by King Rama to rescue his kidnapped wife, Sita. Hanuman, the famed monkey-god of strength and masculinity and devotee of King Rama, is largely hailed for his never-say-die attitude that ultimately led him to rescue Sita and return her to Rama and to her home.
Where the gap isn’t being closed is that all of these text explain when war is necessary and then how to come down from conflict. It takes peace as the baseline, and gives warriors a context for understanding not only how to prepare for war in a time of peace but just as importantly how to prepare for peace in a time of war. This latter points is the great teaching of these texts. We need to provide that to our military – to arm them with tools to protect themselves in mind and body even in a time of war so that when they return home they can find peace.
Meditation seeks to settle the war of the mind
Many beginning meditators will say:
“I can’t meditate.”
“I can’t get my mind to calm down.”
“I can’t get my mind to stop wandering.”
Meditation is a practice to strengthen the discipline and focus of the mind. It drives our clarity and creativity. It helps us to quiet the chatter so that we can access the deep wisdom that already exists within each of us. It, in and of itself, is an act of faith. To be certain it is a hard thing to do – I failed on many attempts before I was finally ready to learn and understand it. We have to approach the mastery of our minds as a warrior approaches battle – with steadfast resolve and commitment to see the mission through. Because of a soldier’s strong sense of commitment and determination, the self-nurturing practice of meditation is a natural process to undertake in their own healing of mind and body.
Postures for warriors
Several of the base postures of the asana (physical) practice of yoga are named for warriors. There is a series of Warrior postures – 1, 2, 3, and Peaceful Warrior – that are central to all standing sequences. In yoga practice, warriors are emulated and admired as masters of poise and control.
Authenticity is critical for soldiers and yogis alike There is a common belief that yoga is about peace at any cost. When I tell people I practice and teach yoga I sometimes garner a funny look. Someone once said to me, “Aren’t you a little too tough to teach yoga?” And by tough, he meant honest, strong-willed, and opinionated. I am all of those things, and yes, I’m a yogi, too. And no, that is not a contradiction.
For me yoga has always been about authenticity, about having the strength to honestly call a spade and spade. It’s in this honesty to recognize the actual state of being that allows us to then transcend that state. Without honesty and awareness of self and others, without a strong sense of justice and a desire to make things right, yoga has very little hope of achieving anything, peace included. The same is true for the missions of our military forces.
Bringing more yoga to the U.S. military
For all these reasons, I have to disagree with my friend who felt soldiers would never take to yoga. Soldiers are the perfect population to focus my yoga teaching efforts on through Compass Yoga. I’m doing a lot of business development and networking at the moment, and hope to announce my first yoga program for veterans and their families in short order. Stay tuned!
To move a project forward, focus is necessary. You can’t know what beat to march to unless you can hear the drum. Without at least a general idea of where to go, a lot of effort is spent wandering around aimlessly. I’m an efficiency junky and I hate wasting time, or worse yet having someone else waste my time, so focus is incredibly important to me.
Stop and Get Clear Compass Yoga is beginning to occupy a great portion of my life, which is what I’ve been working toward for the past 18 months. It’s very much the work of my lifetime, or many lifetimes, and it’s my legacy. I feel blessed to have found this calling so early on in my life and to have so much clarity on its direction and purpose. My yoga practice and teaching is very much focused on its therapeutic aspects and the relief it can provide us for both mental and physical wellbeing.
To get to this clarity, I had to really put aside to outside influences, get quiet, and listen. There were lots of people who wanted to send me off in different directions once I finished my first leg of yoga teacher training. I am very grateful that they were so interested, but when I really stopped and considered their advice, I just couldn’t follow their instructions and be authentic. I had to go my own way and forge my own path. It’s the message I received in my daily meditation practice and it’s the one that felt most worthwhile.
Assessment Time – Take Off the Blinders and Expand the Mind
Once I knew I wanted to have a therapeutic focus in my teaching, I took a look at the landscape of where to take further training and where to begin looking for opportunities to teach. I quickly realized that few training programs focus on therapeutics (which will be another focus of Compass Yoga once I build up the organization a bit more) and there is an incredible amount of need for it. I hit the opportunity jackpot with this road, and it dovetailed perfectly with my own unique personal experience with yoga.
I found my way to yoga for therapeutic purposes and it made a tremendous difference in my life. Finding this same emphasis as my teaching purpose brought all of my experiences, as challenging as they were, full circle. It gave them great value and purpose. Once I realized all of this available opportunity and all that I have to give in this realm, I felt like someone took off the blinders that I have been wearing for so many years. Now I see opportunity everywhere.
Choice – the Final Frontier
I quickly realized that I could easily spin myself around in a circle if I didn’t narrow down my business development efforts to a population or a cause that I feel most passionately about. There’s no end to the amount of work that can be done in therapeutic yoga and it’s easy to get caught up in wanting to help everyone. I’ve always found that by trying to serve everyone, you serve no one well. I had to choose, and choose I did.
How I chose to focus on helping veterans and their families
I found my way to yoga as a means of recovery – from trauma, stress, anxiety, and insomnia. By my early twenties, I found that my mind and body were sufficiently battered. Yoga helped me to pick up the pieces and put myself back together again. Over time, it helped to heal old and new wounds alike and continues to do so. It became so much more than an exercise I did on a mat. It became a way of life. I live my practice; it’s always with me and within me and that’s a powerful possession to have.
A Teacher Finds Her Students
My goal with my teaching is to help others like me, others who feel battered, beaten down, or lost, and want very much to feel independent and in control of their own lives again. When I hear and read the stories of veterans, when I hear the stats of how much help they and their families need, on some very basic level I understand that need. I have never been into battle as they have. I’ve never even held a weapon of any kind. I do personally understand the aftermath of trauma and what it does to a family, particularly to children. I understand profound, irreversible loss, grief, and guilt. I understand the feeling of not being whole, present, and engaged. I’ve been there, too.
Yoga, which literally translates to “union”, helped me to bring it all back together for me and I know I can use it to help veterans and their families. The practice gave me direction, discipline, and an outlet to process and feel my feelings so that I could move on, so that I could transcend. No matter what the cause, that’s what all people in trauma are looking for – not a way to forget but a way to move on and honor all that we learned in the process. Yoga gets us there. It takes time and patience, but the door is open if we have the courage to walk through.
My friend, Amanda, posted this up on her Facebook page and I love it so much that I wanted to share it as today’s post. It gets at all of my beliefs about passion, finding our life’s work, love, travel, and the passing of time. 
