Month: October 2010

business, community, creativity, entrepreneurship, love

Step 294: Love Connection

Christa Avampato

“You are connected to everything. Love accordingly.” ~ All Day Buffet during The Feast Conference

The Feast Conference happened last week in New York. I didn’t attend this year but plan to attend next year. The Feast Conference is curated by All Day Buffet, a company based in New York City that connects, develops, and launches purpose-driven ventures. I featured my interview Jerri Chou, one of the co-founders of All Day Buffet, in my book Hope in Progress. She is among the most inspirational, dream-pumping innovators out there, as is Co-founder Michael Karnjanaprakorn. I regularly visit the site to keep up with their work. There’s always something good cookin’ over there.

The quote above showed up on All Day Buffet’s Twitter feed last week during The Feast Conference, and it is now the title image on their site. There’s so much emphasis put on connection and collaboration, and it’s an easy thing to do. There is so much knowledge that lies just a few clicks away. It’s found just outside every door and during every interaction we have. We have the opportunity to connect every moment.

Love is a main ingredient to connections. Love for people, ideas, learning, causes. Every time we put negative energy out there, and particularly when we direct it at someone, we are actually hurting ourselves more than we realize. This is a big, big world, despite how small it feels given technology. There is more than enough room for more dreams and ideas and voices. And they don’t threaten our own ideas and voices. When we build others up, we do ourselves a favor by growing our networking and engendering support and faith in return for the support and faith we give to others.

Call it a retro idea to love our neighbors. Think of it as crunch-y and granola-y to believe that we reap what we sow. I love granola and I love love.

Image above from All Day Buffet’s website.

books, clarity, commitment, discovery, dreams, encouragement

Step 293: Call Off the Search for Certainty

Christa Avampato

“We search for certainty but it certainly doesn’t exist.” ~ Kristen Moeller, author of Waiting for Jack: Confessions of a Self-Help Junkie

This recession has caused a lot of us to delay their dreams, or change them altogether. We believe we have to stay at a job that’s safe, where we believe that we can stay for as long as we need to stay until things get better. Kristen’s simple, powerful quote reminded me that we don’t need to delay the life we want, that safety and certainty are things we have made up. It’s understandable to want certainty. I want it all the time, for every decision I make. The lesson of yoga that’s been the most useful to me is that certainty is not coming, but there are so many things that we just can’t know for sure. Nothing is permanent; the only certainty is change, in one form or another.

This can be a frightening revelation. We like the idea of certainty being out there somewhere because it helps us to get from day to day. It keeps us searching and hoping and wishing. But if we can grapple with it for just a moment, recognize that certainty isn’t coming, and embrace that idea, we can find a power within ourselves that is unshakable. There is no need to say some day – the life we want can start today.

Follow Kristen on Twitter and visit her site.

business, creativity, entrepreneurship

Step 292: Leaders Should Establish a Cult of Creativity

Christa Avampato

Start-ups need cults – that’s the assertion of Steve Newcomb, the incredibly successful entrepreneur associated with a variety of start-ups, many with a bent for social change. Ventures Hacks featured his essay on on why it’s critical for start-ups team to be incredibly passionate about their work. If you miss that piece as a founder, it’s akin to throwing in the towel on the whole idea. (Incidentally, Steve started blogging with the platform created by Squarespace, a company I featured in my book Hope in Progress.)

There’s a lot of lip service paid to the saying “our people are our greatest asset”, particularly in big companies. Companies have two choices – really live that statement and get behind it with everything you’ve got or stop using it altogether. Companies, start-ups or otherwise, need to give their people resources and support to shine, or be honest about the fact that the company actually isn’t about the people, but about profit or PR or the CEO’s ego or whatever other asset they really believe is the most important one they have. My suggestion is that leaders should do nothing else except serve their people. That’s their job.

Steve articulately and honestly wrote out his manifesto on teams in this essay. It’s a long one and every word is worth reading. My favorite pieces of his advice include: “Suspend Disbelief, then Think Backwards” (Bill Keating) and “Make Sure Every Single [Job] Candidate is Treated Like Gold” (Steve Newcomb). There are numerous other nuggets of gold for entrepreneurs in his essay – it’s well-worth the time to take them all to heart.

Image above by Steve Newcomb.

art, community, creativity, talents, technology, TED

Step 291: Collaboration Gives Life to Dreams

Christa Avampato

“Have a collegial, supportive, yeasty, zany, laughter-filled environment where folks support one another, and politics is as absent as it can be in a human (i.e., imperfect) enterprise.” ~ Tom Peters

“If you want to be incrementally better: Be competitive. If you want to be exponentially better: Be cooperative.” ~ Author Unknown, via Daily Good

Here’s the most exciting development in an increasing global marketplace and integrated society: collaboration is no longer an option. To get anything done these days, we must play nice in the sandbox and we must encourage and support the dreams and visions of others. I used to have a refrigerator magnet that read “Be Nice or Leave. Thank You.” I used to post it up at work and people would think “oh, isn’t that funny?” And actually it wasn’t. It was my truth. If people can’t be nice, then I can’t work with them. I’m 100% fine with people who passionately and vocally stand by their convictions and have opinions. I have loads of them, and I love people who have a strong point-of-view. But respecting and accepting that different ideas are possible and viable is critical to the kindness I’m looking for in others and cultivating within myself. We learn a lot from the opinions of others, particularly if they don’t match our own.

My friend, Chris, just spoke at TEDxGotham, whose theme centered on collaboration. (Check out his Twitter feed at http://twitter.com/Chris_Elam.) His dance company, Misnomer, is working on a technology platform that greatly enhances an artist’s ability to connect and collaborate with an audience. Artists are the perfect group to lead this charge for collaboration across the board because their livelihoods are predicated on it. They must work with others to convey their visions, and rely on the opinions and actions of others to spread the message of their work.

We all have that artist spirit within us. We all have visions of the world we’d like to live in. We have dreams and hopes and fears. It’s one of the underlying aspects of being human – our imagination. The tie that binds. And so even if we don’t understand or agree with someone, we can take comfort in the fact that all people, everywhere, have the desire to build the life they imagine.

There’s a tendency for a little voice inside us to get too much air time. “How could you possibly do “x”? or “Are you really qualified to make “y” happen?” We can sometimes feel selfish for getting all that we work for and deserve. Thank that little voice for its efforts and then turn its volume down to zero. You deserve to see your dreams come alive, and then some. When we base our lives on our imaginations, we’re giving others the inspiration and strength to do the same. Living the life you want is actually the most generous gift you can give the world because you’re giving us the very best of you. It’s the very highest ideal of collaboration.

happiness

Step 290: The Work of Happiness

Christa Avampato

“Happy people learn that happiness, like sweat, is a by-product of activity.” ~ Frank Pittman III

Happiness doesn’t happen to us. It doesn’t find us by accident. The happiest people I know get out there and work for it – happiness is a priority for them. They actively cultivate relationships and activities that make them smile. Sure they hit rough spots – they have times of sadness and loneliness, times when they’re disappointed or feel sorry for themselves and for others. But their MO when these tough times hit is to take action to turn the situation around. They feel empowered and confident to improve their lot in life, and by extension take their positive outlook out into the world to help others.

As we head into the dark half of the year, I start my ritual of reflection. Thinking about where I was last Fall, where I am now, and where I’d like to go. I take note of all of the good people and events in my life, and count my blessings. I am lucky to have many, and I know it. Lately a few things have been making me especially happy these days and they deserve some recognition:

1.) My dog, Phineas. I got Phineas almost a month ago to the day and he’s become such a good pal that I’m not sure what I did without him. He’s a continuous reminder to me that hurt can heal, that it’s okay to leave the past in the past and move onward and upward.

2.) Love is in the air. Some people think of Spring as the time for love. I always find that Fall is better in that department. I haven’t found that love just yet, but for some reason I feel like he’s right around the corner.

3.) The holidays are here. It’s not yet Halloween and Thanksgiving and Christmas are already abundantly present in stores across the city. I’ve started to think about holiday plans, and am looking forward to more time with family and friends. The holidays are always a joyful time for me, and this year will be especially so as it’s my little niece Aubree’s first year with us.

4.) Opportunities are cropping up everywhere. Once we tell the world exactly what we’d like to do, the world has a way of giving us resources to get those things done. It can be scary to admit, out loud, what we’d like to achieve, but I assure you that it is the best way to get the life you want. Be vocal about your dreams.

5.) A new boss at work. Change can be hard and getting a new boss can some times be a bit nerve-wracking. We don’t know how it’s going to go until we’re there. Lucky for me, my new boss is fantastic and she’s jumped right in to be a wonderful collaborator.

What things have you done to help generate more happiness?

learning, mentor, teaching, writing

Step 289: 5 Ways to Effectively Use Our Windows of Wisdom

Christa Avampato

?What If! Innovation is one of my favorite innovation firms. They have a resource they use to get at key insights called “WOWs”, short for “Windows of Wisdom”. Everyone has them. Pieces of experience, knowledge, and expertise that give us special insights into how things work, or how they should work. They help us build empathy and compassion for specific circumstances. Being a parent, having a pet, living in a certain city, how we commute to work, what we do all day to earn a living, what we read, watch on TV, and hobbies we take up in our free time. It all matters – who we are is largely determined by how and with whom we spend our time.

Never underestimate WOWs, yours or anyone else’s. Insight is an elusive, odd beast that shows up in the strangest ways at the strangest times. Our WOWs are handy little assets to always keep in our back pockets. They help us recognize opportunities, and can be used for the greater good. Be generous with them – share what you know.

Here are 5 ways to put your WOWs to work:

1.) Crowding sourcing databases. A quick Google search will provide a myriad of agencies that now list crowd sourcing as an expertise and they need communities of people to be their experts. Their business depends on it. So get out there, join some of them, get compensated (in a variety of ways), and put your experience to work.

2.) Mentor or teach. Young people need our stories and example, now more than ever. Mentoring and teaching is the ultimate gift we can give because it involves generously sharing our own history. Check out sites like Takepart.com or Volunteermatch.org to find mentoring opportunities near you.

3.) Write. Writing in any form is helpful to connect us to others, to inspire, and to learn. Blog, comment on blogs, write a column or an op-ed, get involved in online communities of people with common interests. Put your thoughts out there generously and you’ll be surprised by the goodness you get in return.

4.) Create partnerships. Think of networking as finding like-minded partners. Write letters to people you admire – that’s how I wrote my column for Examiner that ultimately became my e-book, Hope in Progress. Online communities and Twitter are other great places to find potential partners who are as passionate as you are about your interests.

5.) Start a side business. Your key insights can be leveraged creatively to generate extra income. My interest in yoga led me to pursue my 200-hour RYT training and my creation of Compass Yoga. My interest in the art of writing led to my freelance writing work. Your hobbies can help you do well and do good at the same time when you share them with the world.

How have you put your experience to work for you?

creativity, garden, nature

Step 288: Be a Greenhouse for New Ideas

Christa Avampato

There is a strong parallel between gardening and creativity. Gardening has elements of design – color, placement, texture, size. There’s also a common element of surprise in gardening and creativity. We may plant the seeds of a specific plant, but we aren’t sure exactly how it will look until it blooms. The same goes for creativity – the solution or product or service we ultimately create may be very different from our first idea. There’s an even deeper parallel between gardening and creativity, one that we can and should intentionally, powerfully pursue.

A few months ago, I wrote a post about new ideas needing friends. Part of being a friend to new ideas is providing a safe place for them to be in their infancy, providing nourishment and space to grow. To be a friend to new ideas, we must act as greenhouses for them.

New ideas can cause disruption and inconvenience. They ask us to change and grow and alter our existing perceptions of ourselves, of others, and of the world around us. They can make us uncomfortable. They can scare us. Rather than shying away, we should pursue the ones that scare us the most. Ask why they stir our emotions in a specific way. That’s where the learning is. Ultimately, we may decide to put those ideas aside, and even if we do, they will have been great teachers for us by strengthening our convictions provided we give them a chance to show us what they’ve got.

art, change, choices, faith, fear, politics, relationships, religion, theatre

Step 287: Review of the Off-Broadway Show, Freud’s Last Session

Christa Avampato

In 1998, I saw the play Picasso at the Lapin Agile in San Francisco. I remember being completely riveted watching the fictional meeting of two of the most inspiring characters of all time, Einstein and Picasso. This construct for a play appealed to me so much that I still routinely think about that show 12 years later. It was at times touching and sad, joyful and hopeful. Full of lively, passionate debate and intense discussion about timeless social issues, I always felt it would be hard for a play to match Steve Martin’s brilliance.

Lucky for us Mark St. Germain has succeeded in building a script that’s even more powerful and thought-provoking than Martin’s – Freud’s Last Session, now playing off-Broadway at The Marjorie S. Deane Little Theater at the West Side YMCA. Freud’s Last Session showcases the possibly factual meeting between a young C.S. Lewis, a devout Christian and the gifted author who would go on to write The Chronicles of Narnia and The Screwtape Letters, and Sigmund Freud, a life-long atheist, consummate intellectual, and founding figure of psychoanalysis, who is at the very end of his life and career, dying of oral cancer. Set in London on September 3, 1939, the invasion of Poland by the Nazis serves as the political backdrop of their meeting.

The piece made me laugh out loud one moment, and tug at my deepest convictions the next. The dialogue is so sharp and the acting by Martin Rayner (Freud) and Mark H. Dold (Lewis) so penetrating that the 75-minute show flew by, too quickly in my opinion. I wanted more of the debate and the history. I found myself rooting for their relationship, and wanting it to go on, in spite of knowing that 20 days later Freud would engage his long-time friend and physician to end his battle with cancer.

The show touches upon an incredibly diverse set of themes: religion first and foremost, war, death, sexuality, fear, faith, love, memory, humor, and change. While this list of topics seems overwhelming, they are in the very capable hands and words of St. Germain, who expertly weaves them together in such a seamless way that I found myself completely wrapped up in the story as if it were my own. The language he uses is so vivid and the mannerisms of the actors are so authentic that I truly felt I was peering into a window on history. This play is the most rare form of theatrical work – a perfect script. Every single word precisely and beautifully chosen. The set and lighting designs are so realistic that I felt transported across space and time to Freud’s London study to witness this single, emotional meeting.

This show has a special, very personal meaning for me because my father was a Freudian psychologist. He passed away when I was a teenager, long before I ever had the opportunity to have a conversation with him as Lewis may have had with Freud. I didn’t get the opportunity to understand his contradictions and complexities, though that may have been for the best. At the end of his life, he was in a great deal of pain physically and emotionally, as Freud was. Through the dialogue of Freud’s Last Session, I was able to put together some more pieces about my father’s personality, as if I had actually been placed there in that seat for a very specific reason – to help me get a little bit closer to understanding my childhood. My thanks to Mark St. Germain for this amazing gift; he has inspired me to dig deeper and learn more about Freud and Lewis. I’m confident that there are more answers there, waiting for me to discover them. And that is perhaps the greatest lesson of the show – that self-discovery is a journey that never ends and yet must be pursued. As he so adeptly has Lewis say, “The real struggle is to keep trying.”

Freud’s Last Session runs through November 28th at The Marjorie S. Deane Little Theater. Don’t miss it.

Image above depicts Mark H. Dold and Martin Rayner as Lewis and Freud, respectively.

education, learning, student, teaching, yoga

Step 286: Teaching to Improve Ourselves and Our Students

Christa Avampato

“Teaching is the greatest act of optimism.” ~ Colleen Wilcox

I thought about this quote on Monday night as I wrapped up my second yoga class at Columbia Law School. I was more familiar with the space this time, brought some new music, and recognized some repeat students. Teaching requires improvisation. We explain something a specific way, see if the meaning is registering with the students, and if not, we try something else. No time for judgment. We’ve got to get better with each moment. Teachers constantly seek to improve themselves and their students. It is an act of constant faith in our ability, in the journey, and in one another.

With each yoga class I teach, I find myself walking in and thinking “I want this to be the best class I’ve ever given.” Usually it falls short of my expectations, no matter how much effort I put into it. I always end up jotting down a page of notes that detail things I could have done better. I take that page and plow into the next class, confident that there will always be another page of improvements from that next class. The cycle of continuous improvement never ends in teaching. It is the gift that truly keeps on giving so long as we keep showing up.

animals, dogs, nature

Step 285: Talk to the Animals with Trish Scott’s Help

Christa Avampato

When I first adopted Phineas, he had some separation anxiety. He cried when I left for work, and those little cries broke my heart. One of the first calls I made was to Trish Scott, a brilliant animal behaviorist, loyal reader of this blog, and talented writer. Trish responded immediately with top-notch advice. I also read a copy of her e-book, An Introduction to Animal & Nature Communication. Phineas is now well-adjusted to his new surroundings and barely blinks when I leave for work in the morning.

One of Trish’s key pieces of advice that really helped me and Phin, and appealed to my yoga philosophies, is that dogs can feel our energy whether we’re in the same room or many miles apart. When I’m at work and Phinny is home, we’re still linked. Intuitively I have known about this link between animals and humans for many years. When I was in college, I had several dreams about saying good-bye to my black lab, Cosby. Sure enough, my mom called a few days later to say that he had passed. He and I said good-bye in our own way, separated by hundreds of miles. Cosby’s spirit found his way to me to let me know it was time for him to go. I had a chance to hug him one more time and thank him for being so faithful for so many years.

Trish suggested that while I’m at work I imagine giving Phin a hug, patting him on the head, and telling him I’ll be home soon. I do this several times a day, and remarkably I can feel that it helps Phineas. Trish also gave me a few other tips like getting a kong toy for him and carving out a little space in my apartment for him to have as his own. Combined, all of these tips made a huge difference, though I truly believe recognizing and honoring our energy connection helped the most. As soon as I started practicing our long distance communication, I noticed a difference in his demeanor. He calmed down, relaxed, and trusted me more. Trish gave me such a precious gift – she gave me my pup in his very best form.

If you’ve ever wanted to have a closer relationship with animals, or you’re curious about the lessons they have to teach us (and yes, animals are some of our very best teachers!), I highly recommend Trish’s book. The happiness and peace you’ll find by taking her advice to heart will richly improve your life. It’s certainly improved mine by leaps and bounds.