I tell wonder-filled stories about hope and healing
Two people at work have recently been promoted to a level that requires them to be seated closer to our company president. Both of these people have assistants that will be coming along with them so it was time for me to relinquish my front row seat watching how a company seeks to re-invent itself. Or so I thought.
Bob, my boss, is a mast-negotiator. He would never admit that; he is far too humble to ever toot his own horn. No matter – I’m happy to sing his praises as loudly and as often as I can. He deserves it. He hates the idea of ever being separated from his team at work and so he politely offered to have all three of us move to another area of the building. Nope, his boss wasn’t having that. Bob’s not going anywhere. So this week I moved across the hall with the third member of our team into a lovely office.
I hadn’t ever considered the possibility of getting an office at my company. I knew they were reserved for people at a much higher level than me. No one else thought it would be possible either. Bob took the two of us downstairs to the cafe this past week to have a coffee and celebrate our new digs. “Place profoundly effects progress,” he said. And he’s right – already I feel myself moving more swiftly in almost every area of my life and I think the space is the catalyst.
In addition to moving into a new space, Bob also encouraged us to make new name tags to hang outside our office. It had never occurred to me to replace the boring grey placard that stated my name, rank, and coded space. “Operations Support” was my job description according to the tag, despite the fact that I have nothing to do with operations. I’m not sure where they come up with this stuff. I couldn’t think of a less inspiring, or more inaccurate, job description if I tried.
A few weeks ago Bob sent me a job post from IDEO, a company we both greatly admire. I thought for sure this was the beginning of the end for me – I was being outplaced before I even hit the 6 month mark. In actuality, Bob was just trying to give me some structure and creative language to describe what it is we actually do in our very ambiguous jobs: we are nothing short of Human Factors Specialists. I proudly wrote that on my new office tag, and included a picture and poem by Brian Andreas, one of my favorite artists.
So what is a Human Factors Specialist you ask? It’s a fairly simple concept: we develop and foster opportunities to create joy through design. On IDEO’s website, they describe their human factors specialists as those who “apply their knowledge from psychology, anthropology, biomechanics, and related fields to enhance people’s experience through design. As interdisciplinary design team members, they employ a range of observational and empathic techniques to understand the issues people face. They use this knowledge to frame design opportunities and to create scenarios and “experiential prototypes” to explore, test, and refine opportunities in context.”
I don’t know that our HR folks will go for this fancy language, and that’s okay. While they may sequester me to a formal job description like “Operations Support”, I’m working hard to make make sure my imagination doesn’t fail me.
The above photo can be found at http://www.davlinswoods.com/Pictures/SPP0105.jpg
I am a big Robert Scoble fan. One, I admire the road he paved for bloggers by fearlessly and honestly blogging about his life at Microsoft while an employee there. I also admire his ability to constantly stay true to himself.
He recently announced that he took a position with Fast Company to run their video network dedicated to business. The network launches on March 3rd. Prior to accepting this post, Scoble considered starting his own business. And decided against it for a number of reasons. In short, when he thoght about what he loved – blogging, interviewing people, and his family – none of those things lined up with what it takes to be an entrepreneur.
This gave me pause as I am now considering embarking on the road to my own company. Please understand that I am a huge advocate for small business and for those who want to go it on their own. I am an even bigger advocate for following your heart, doing what you love, and finding a career that allows you to soar on your strengths. For many, that does mean starting their own companies. Though for others, it means they need to find a company that provides them an opportunity to capitalize on what they do best.
Entrepreneurship isn’t for everyone, and I wonder if so many new businesses fail because some people who start them don’t realize all they are getting into. Scoble’s advice and insight merit a read for anyone starting a business. To read his full post on the subject, visit http://scobleizer.com/2008/01/16/why-were-going-to-fastcompanytv/.
While powerpoint may be one of the main tools of MBAs and business schools, I have maintained a distinct dislike of the program and how it’s ruined the natural human ability of story telling. Executives and consultants hide behind them. It’s not a well-designed program, lack any kind of intuitive functionality, and for the most part provides a canvas for a lot of data, though no information.
I recently read a Harvard Business Review article about storytelling. Bronwyn Fryer interviewed screenwriting coach Robert McKee. McKee’s students have written, directed, and produced legions of popular movies such as Forest Gump and Monty Python. He is the basis for the main character of the movie Adaptation.
The article written my Fryer is both moving and insightful. While many leaders in business are intelligent and dilligent, they often lack the emotion, empathy, and concern to truly connect to those who work in their organizations and their customers. This is a problem that business schools and corporations should see as a crisis. Numbers and information are clouding our ability to interpret what we see and create meaningful solutions to today’s business woes. Is it any wonder we are heading for recession.
Corporate employees and customers need to be inspired, and they need to feel cared for and appreciated. As business people, we need to “get” our customers. And this takes far more than data and gant charts. It takes an ability and desire to truly walk in someone else’s shoes and live their lives. It requires a strong curiosity, a willingness to not only hear but listen to the concerns of others, and most importantly a craving for connection and simplicity.
Powerpoint can’t get us there. Storytelling can.
The images above can be found at http://www1.istockphoto.com/file_thumbview_approve/2819067/2/istockphoto_2819067_reading_story_book.jpg
“I kept myself calm by making sure I didn’t concentrate on anything I couldn’t control.”
–B.J. Bedford, Olympic swimmer
BJ Bedford barely made the U.S. Olympic swim team in 1996 and then went on to win the gold at Sydney just four years later. If this mantra worked for her, I believe it can work for all of us. A lot of our anxiety as a society, and as individuals, is driven off the unknown fed by a focus on things we cannot control.
I worry a lot, as I have written about several times on this site. I worry about the economy, our environment, terrorism, about the states of education and healthcare. I worry that George Bush has damaged our nation so badly on so many levels that it may take all of the effort of the next administration, Democrat, Republican, or otherwise, four years just to get us back to where we were at the end of Bill Clinton’s Presidency. What do I control in these situations? What can I actually do to contribute?
The economy: I am an ardent saver. I live within my means, and most often below them. I do my best to make smart investments. I show up every day at my desk at work and do the very best I can in every moment. I look to buy products that make a difference, be that they are more environmentally friendly, healthier, or provide a benefit to those who manufacture them such as fair trade farmers. I watch the market, and I educate myself on the actions of the Fed and policy makers that can move the needle.
I try to propagate peace and tolerance in the environments I make my life in, hoping that I can inspire other people to do the same. I recycle, and I make every effort to always use less, whether it’s energy, paper, water, or any other natural resource.
And as far as George Bush – I do my best. I voted for the other candidates both times, mostly because I refuse to vote for anyone who is incapable of stringing five correctly pronounced words together to make a coherent sentence. Plus, I fundamentally disagree with his stance on nearly every issue. I control what I can control.
My politics aside, there is a lesson for all of us in BJ Bedford’s quote. What I do to maintain control is nothing extraordinary. They are choices I simply make by being aware of the world around me. It may be worth it to make a list of what’s in our control and what’s not in any given situation in which we feel stressed. The list can serve as a visual cue to help us refocus our energies and efforts so that we can generate a sense of calm both within ourselves and for those around us.
The photo above can be found at: http://www.colly.com/images/uploads/control_poster_420.jpg
With winter weather upon us and the traffic crunch in this city as bad as it’s ever been, it’s easy to feel frustrated and set-back. This morning I received an email with 7 ways to create gratitude.
In short:
Just stop
Freeze-frame It
Create a gratitude journal
Replace the words “at least” with “even if”
Change your lens
The three questions: What has surprised me?, What has touched
me?, What has inspired me?
Connect your mind to your body
For the full article, go to http://publicaffairs.uth.tmc.edu/hleader/archive/MIND_BODY_SOUL/2003/7ways-1124.html
The photo above can be found at http://www.abundance-and-happiness.com/images/gratitude-quotes.jpg
I will preface this post by saying it is completely okay for you to laugh about this situation. I know you’ll be laughing at my expense and I totally understand. It’s funny, and I may be the only person on the planet who would be able to have these kinds of odds.
A few days ago a close friend was the first to let me know that an ex-boyfriend of mine that she is connected to on Facebook had changed his profile and had come out. When he and I broke up it was very sudden and without any kind of warning. He called me up on a Sunday morning on his way to a baseball game and declared “I just can’t do this anymore.” No reason, no nothing. He actually said that giving explanations for his actions isn’t his “forte”. And he said all of this with the emotion of a rock, after only weeks before we had talked about getting married. We were very much in love, or at least I was.
I was left stunned and heartbroken. I physically hurt from the news and had a tough time eating or sleeping for months afterwards. In time I created my own closure, with the help of amazing friends and family, turned my attention to other things, and was slowly able to put myself back together. I began to date again and have had relationships since. Though I in no way wanted anything to do with my ex again, there was a small piece of me that would always be confused about what happened and why.
With his announcement to the world that he was gay, I finally had an answer that made sense. At first I was confused and then angry, sad. I felt betrayed and lied to. I was hurt deeply, again. I knew he was a coward given the way he broke up with me, though this new news put everything in perspective. He must have been going through something terrible and he felt he couldn’t trust me with the truth. I never really knew him at all, and the amazing man I fell in love with was never really who he was. I moved through these emotions pretty quickly since it has been a long time since we’ve even talked to one another much less dated.
I was against contacting him, and then found through the encouragement of a few friends that sending him an email expressing how I felt would be good for both of us. I sat down and wrote him an email, and rewrote it a hundred times. I wanted to communicate that I was disappointed in the way that he came out, though wanted to make sure he knew that he had been a precious part of my life and that I wished him well now that he had come to terms with a difficult situation. Beautiful, right? Wrong.
Less than a minute after I looked up his email address (as I have removed every shred of him from my life including pictures, gifts, and contact info) and sent off my well-crafted message, I get a snarky three-liner back saying this is all just an accident and in the weeks since he’s posted this change no one else has told him about the mistake. He clicked the wrong box under “relationships”. He’s sure this new news doesn’t make anything better, but he does hope I’m well. I am so glad I could be of service to someone so undeserving of me doing anything for him! Unbelievable….my mother always said “no good deed goes unpunished.”
If he had been in front of me, I would have kicked him in the teeth – and I’m a pacifist. I was so angry that I had felt such empathy for the difficult time he was going through. He’s not going through any difficulty at all – he just doesn’t know how to use Facebook. I never imaged that would be the case since if he’s anything he’s detail-oriented and a technology whiz, or at least he was when I knew him.
The flip side is that even after being hurt by someone, I still had the ability to be empathic toward him. My wide array of emotions is sometimes a downfall, though most of the time it is a blessing. I live a fuller life because of my ability to emotionally connect with other. I’d much prefer to be a person who occasionally gets burned by feeling too much than be a person who has the emotional maturity of a robot without a forte for communication.
Facebook and other social networking tools are terrific ways to keep up with people and share information. A word to the wise: before spending an ounce of energy reacting to anything posted about anyone, make sure it’s factual. The last thing you want to do is lay your heart on the line due to someone else’s inability to click the correct box. Good grief! And now at least, I’m laughing with you….
I had planned to spend today shopping for some delicious morsels and cocktail ingredients to host a Golden Globes party. I sent an email around to a few people several weeks ago and my friend Dan replied “I’d love to watch the awards at your place, if they air them.” I have been watching the writers’ strike with intensity, mostly because there isn’t much else to watch these days. I may actually accomplish my goal of learning more about classic films because I will soon be forced to subscribe to Netflix.
And despite the threats of picketing the Golden Globes and actors refusing to cross the line, I thought they’d make an exception. I thought that some things would be kept sacred and writers and producers would call a truce just for a night to pay tribute to the incredible work that has been done in film this year. In an effort of full disclosure, I agree with the writers. If producers are making money off their work, regardless of medium, they should get a cut. Anything short of that, in my opinion, is stealing. And it’s just plain mean.
In spite of my political views on the strike, the ones I feel most for are the nominees this season. To make it in your career to a point that your entire industry recognizes your contribution is cause for extreme celebration. And instead of having their moment, they’ll get a press conference with their names read in a no-doubt glum tone of voice.
I think it’s time for a boxing match. Get those that represent the writers and those that represent the producers, lock them in a room, give them food, water, and regular bathroom breaks, and don’t let them out until there’s a green light to restore episodes of Brothers and Sisters, along with all of the other shows I have been missing these past few months.
I know negotiations are difficult; I know both sides are so sick of one another that the idea of being in a room with one another is enough to make them all sick to their stomachs. I don’t care – walking away from conversations just because they’re hard is immature and irresponsible. A lot of people are being hurt in this process and I am a firm believer that if it is within something’s power to mitigate the pain they are causing others, then the only reasonable and kind thing to do is relieve that suffering.
I am getting off my soapbox now and will be found watching movies like Casablanca and Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner until the picket signs come down.
The photo above can be found at http://www.nytimes.com/2007/11/16/us/16writers.html.
I receive an email every day from Daily Good. With all of the negative news out in the world, I wanted to have a daily reminder of wonderful things that are happening to. Even in the darkest times, there are at least slivers of light.
Today I received an especially dose of Daily Good. David Krieger, Founder and President of the Nuclear Age Peace Foundation, put together 100 ways that each of us can create a more peaceful world. They’re simple things. Nothing Earth shattering. Nice reminders of things that we need to be reminded of. I’m printing it out and hanging it up in my home in the hopes that these reminders will bring about a more peaceful 2008, even if just in my own small world.
The list of 100 ways to generate peace and the photo above can be found at http://www.wagingpeace.org/menu/issues/peace-&-war/start/100-peace-ideas/100-peace-ideas.htm
One of my dearest friends, Amy, left for Geneva today. She’ll be there for six months interning for the U.N. I am so proud of her and excited to hear about her adventures in a new place. Amy is someone who “paints her own canvas” as Gordon MacKenzie would say.
I have finally finished Orbiting the Giant Hairball. I was enjoying it chapter by chapter, putting it down after each because there were so many thought-provoking ideas embedded in nearly every sentence. Gordon MacKenzie fully understood the idea of making every word count.
Among all of the beautiful doodles and thoughts on how to run a company, invigorate meetings, and inspire creativity in even the dullest environments there is one story that stands out to me. It’s the first time a business management book actually made my eyes well up. At the very end of the book, Gordon MacKenzie writes a letter from God to a new born child. He uses the analogy that each of us is born with a blank canvas and a sense of wonder. Somewhere along the way the canvas is taken from us and hidden away where the adult world can draw boxes on it. The canvas will be returned to us once we are deemed responsible, only after we have been properly trained to color within the boxes.
Gordon wanted us to buck that notion. He wants us to “create the biggest, brightest, funniest, fiercest damn dragon” we can. He wanted us to grab our own paint brush to swoosh “through the sensuous goo of Cadmium Yellow, Alizarin Crimson or Ultramarine Blue.” In a very real sense he is asking us to reject stifling forces of any kind in any area of our lives.
To be sure, Gordon’s challenge to us is terrifying. We have done well in high school, gone to college, maybe even graduate school, and worked hard to move up in our careers, all to be told that by doing so we may have just been coloring boxes rather than creating a work of art that expresses who we are at our core and what we value and love.
The photo above can be found at: http://www.trishamclean.com/chakra/orangedragon.jpg
Christa Avampato 