Category: work

career, dreams, learning, work, yoga

Beginning: Wounds Can Be Made Into Wisdom

Christa Avampato

“Turn your wounds into wisdom.” ~ Oprah Winfrey

Opposites are a blessing. We gain new insight into joy through sorrow, love through heartbreak, health through sickness, success through failure. In this way, not getting what we want is a reason to be grateful.

A blessing wrapped in disappointment
When I graduated from business school, I wanted to get a job in media. I had been out of the entertainment industry for a few years and I wanted to get to it more than anything. I interviewed at NBC and it proved to be a day of horrible experiences. I didn’t get the job, and even if I did I wouldn’t have taken it. The day of interviews was that bad, and I was horribly disappointed and hurt by the process. I have been a huge fan of NBC since I was a kid, and this was a dream job for me for as long as I can remember. With this opportunity gone, I had to get a new dream. And I did through Compass Yoga. NBC did me a huge favor in the long-run, even if I didn’t know that at the time.

A chance to show what you know
As life often does, I got another chance to enter the world of television. I recently interviewed for another large TV network whose work I greatly admire. This time I didn’t go into the situation with rose-colored glasses like I did with NBC. I was clear about who I am, how I like to work, and what I’m meant to do. This opportunity just wasn’t what I wanted, and so I opted out of the process despite the network’s strong plea for me to see it through.

That wound from my NBC interview provided me with a great amount of wisdom and the confidence to take control of my own career. It felt good to turn toward a path of my own making.

dreams, faith, free, work

Beginning: Letting Go to Be Free

Christa Avampato

by Thomas Spiessens
“A truth: the more you squeeze, the less you have.” ~ fortune cookie

I had dinner with my friend, Amy, on Saturday night and in my fortune cookie I received this message. Amy and I had just been talking about her decision to not renew her work contract after it expires in January. She’s wanted to pursue a career in the humanitarian field for a number of years and has been saving toward this goal. Now that she’s saved the necessary amount and has a back-up plan in place, she’s giving her dream a whirl.

Amy’s decision requires a lot of faith and flexibility. She needs to be open to a lot of possibilities and outcomes. As with every dream, there is some personal sacrifice that Amy will have to make – the hours will be long and the competition for the roles she most wants is fierce. However, Amy has so much heart and has been preparing for this moment for so long that I have every confidence that she is heading off in a beautiful and meaningful new direction.

To make this choice, Amy had to let go of a bit of her job security and take a road that she will have to build herself. Her greatest insight came when she realized she was holding tight to a job that is not her life’s work. The more we release, the more freedom me gain. As she sees time ticking by she feels an urgency, a call to action to at least give her dream a shot. The worst that could happen is that it won’t work out and she’ll find a new dream, fulfilled with the knowledge that she gave it her very best try. Her example is such a good lesson for me, and for all of us: an open hand can hold more than a clenched fist.

1, career, change, work

Beginning: Get It Done

Christa Avampato
from http://risefromyourashes.blogspot.com/

“You know the rule: If you are falling, dive. Do the thing that has to be done.” ~ Joseph Campbell (given to me by reader, MJ)

“If you have a financial safety net, you’ll always be able to walk away. And that in and of itself will prevent you from having to walk because you can be brutally honest about what you need to stay.” ~ Margaret Heffernan

Being truly honest in the workplace is difficult. Companies have these nasty little things called performance reviews that they can and often do lord over us to get us to fall in line. That is until you just can’t stomach the party line anymore. Some of us have lower tolerances for this than others. Mine is extraordinarily low to nonexistent. Everyone I’ve ever worked with will attest to this, and all of them will say that I am very straight-forward. My favorite description that one of my team mates used a number of years ago to describe me is “tough and fair.”

My mounting frustration at work over the past few months is plainly obvious, to me and to others, and this has been intentional. Authentically, I have to let others know when something just isn’t working. And finally I just decided something had to change, or I had to walk – or dive as Joseph Campbell would say. I am just done with the current situation, and during my mid-year review this week I expressed that. No anger or cynicism. Just a simple statement – “I’m done.” It needed to be said for my own health and the health of the whole system.

This kind of statement is alarming to most because a) few people speak that plainly at work and b) it takes a lot for most people to get to this point. It was a risk certainly, though with Margaret Heffernan’s brilliant advice and my saving abilities, I have the luxury, and I mean luxury to the highest degree for which I am very grateful!, to be able to back it up. I can walk if I need to or want to, and so I can lay out very clearly why improvement needs to be made quickly or we need to part ways.

I had my doubts about whether anything could or would be done in enough time, though I was pleasantly surprised to show up today and find that a shift was put into place overnight. I have some strong beliefs about improvement – 1) it’s a continuous process, 2) it’s always possible, and 3) it’s important to give people a chance to try. It’s incumbent upon us to lay out our frustrations clearly and succinctly, with possible solutions. It’s incumbent upon leaders to get to the bottom of those frustrations and try to solve the systematic problems that cause them. And if those leaders show a genuine effort in trying to improve, I think they deserve a chance to give it a whirl on our behalf. A former boss of mine once told me that it’s important to let people apologize for their mistakes. I’d extend that same kind of sentiment to improvement, too.

So, we’ll see how it goes. We’ll see if the change sticks and if this situation can be turned around, at least in the short-term. Clearly there is something for me to learn in this latest twist in the story. I promise to keep you updated.

choices, decision-making, fate, future, work, writing, yoga

Beginning: Protecting the Crossroads

Christa Avampato

“Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and sorry I could not travel both, and be one traveler long I stood, and looked down one as far as I could…knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back…Two roads diverged in a wood, and I — I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.” ~ Robert Frost

While on vacation I started and finished reading the book Hanuman: The Devotion and Power of the Monkey God. Since beginning a deep study of yoga philosophy about a year and a half ago, I have felt very close to Hanuman. A tiny monkey, he is the most loyal servant of Lord Rama. The child’s version of the story of Hanuman is that he leapt across the world to rescue Sita, Lord Rama’s wife, when she was captured by the enemy during a long and brutal war. The truth is a bit more complicated, as truths tend to be.

In incredible detail, the book elaborates on the story of Hanuman, his dual-characteristics of great devotion and great might, his ability to be a fierce warrior and to lay in wait when that is what’s needed, and his dark and light sides. I had envisioned him as an adorable and adoring little monkey. He is so much more.

I won’t spoil the story for you – you should read the beautiful prose that author Vanamali lays out in exquisite detail. What I do want to share in this post is a role that Hanuman plays that i never knew before reading this book. He is the protector of the crossroads, those places in-between in our lives, the transitions. Ironic (or perhaps just synchronous) that I would learn this now when I feel that I am at such a huge junction in both my personal and professional lives, as I craft a living and a life with Compass Yoga.

In my daily meditations for the past few months, I have felt change arriving slowly, like a light slowly rising, like a clearer vision coming into focus that honors my experience and celebrates my potential offering to humanity. While I am crafting an extraordinary life, I am fully aware that I am also lovingly building a legacy. This is my soul’s work.

In my meditations I have heard a faint and distant voice conveying what I know is very important, though I cannot yet decipher its exact words. I think maybe it has been Hanuman unrolling the map of the decisions I must make, laying out the carpet that takes two directions of which I must choose one.

Joseph Campbell is famous for elucidating the hero’s journey, a choice between two roads that is never easy. Both roads contain trade-offs, good and bad experiences, joy and sorrow, pain and freedom, light and dark. Our goal is not to choose the “right” road, but to choose the “right road for us”. I am at the crossroads, but Hanuman is here with me and so I don’t have to be alone or afraid in my choosing. He will protect and defend while I decide. He will do the same for you, too, and you should take great comfort in that. A bit of help makes the choosing easier, right?

career, dreams, work

Beginning: Leaving My Assistant Hat Behind

Christa Avampato

I had two very vivid dreams while on vacation in Florida. They were so powerful that I truly feel like they were not just merely dreams, but messages. Being away from my home base opened up my mind to new possibilities and ideas. Not surprisingly, both of these dreams had to do with finding my life’s work. One was an affirmation of what I’ve known for some time but didn’t know how to articulate and the other had to do with options as I move forward. I’ll tell you about the first one today and the second one tomorrow.

My chance with The New York Times
I was interviewing to be the assistant to the Executive Editor of The New York Times, an institution that I treasure. For some reason, I decided to stop off and run an errand before going to the interview. My interview was at 5:30 and I looked down at my watch while finishing my errand and it read 5:36. I ended up getting to the interview at 5:50 and Bill Keller (the former editor who just stepped down last month) was waiting for me. He told me he was very disappointed in my tardiness though with some work I could probably make a good assistant. At first, I was horrified at being late (those of you who know me personally know of my great love for punctuality), and then I was horrified by the word “assistant”. I got up from the table, told Mr. Keller I wasn’t interested in being anyone’s assistant, and walked out of the building. It felt amazing.

No longer assistant material
This dream has real significance for a few reasons. If there is any institution that resonates with me for its history and commitment to excellence, it’s The New York Times and I am a huge fan of Bill Keller’s (despite his skepticism about social media). If I was disgusted by the thought of being his assistant, then I can’t really imagine signing up to be anyone’s assistant. I’m grateful for the time I spent as an assistant; I learned so much. And now those days are behind me. For everything, there is a season.

Love the work, love the result
This dream also made me realize that for my work to be truly satisfying, I have to love the work itself as much as the result of that work. I would never be an assistant at The New York Times because that is the kind of job that requires the commitment of someone’s entire life. I used to be a person who could do that; I certainly did that to work in professional theater and I ultimately left to get a life. Now, I guard my personal time as a prized possession. The only mission I’m professionally committed to now is my own with Compass Yoga. I love the work and results of yoga and its teaching.

Times change, and our priorities change right along with them. Now I’m meant to work for me.

determination, dreams, work, writing, yoga

Beginning: Take it From Yoda and a Yogi – All You Have Are Your Actions, and They Are Enough

Christa Avampato

“Do or do not. There is no try.” ~ Yoda

“You are entitled to your actions, not the results of your actions. You leave the results to the Divine.” ~ Marco Rojas, Yoga Teacher

I went to dinner with my friend, Allan, on Saturday night and he asked me how I managed to teach yoga classes in so many different places this past year since I finished my teacher training at Sonic. Without even thinking about the answer, I said, “Because I cannot be deterred, Allan.” And it’s true. If I really want to do something, I’m going to find a way to make it happen.

Lessons from striking out
This is not to say that I never strike out or fall flat on my face. I strike out plenty, and I’ve fallen on my face so many times that it’s shocking I have a face left at all. The truth is in the past year I’ve sent out so many emails, made so many cold calls, and just flat-out walked in to so many potential teaching spots that I’ve lost count. Most of them never returned my calls, emails, or in-person messages that I left. Most of them didn’t hire me. Sometimes I felt disappointed at all of the rejection, but I just kept showing up. Showing up was the only thing I could really control. And every rejection helped me refine my pitch, and my style, a little bit more.

And that’s the trick to getting over and through disappointment: figure out what you can actually do, and focus on doing more of it. I couldn’t make someone hire me. I couldn’t make someone even look at my resume or give me an informational interview. I could keep searching, and I felt confident that if I knocked on enough doors, one of them, the right one for me, would open, and I’d find the students I was meant to teach.

Ignore the skeptics, or at least learn from them
Everyone will tell you that what you want to do is too difficult, that there are already people who do what you want to do, and that you should just try to do something that’s easier. I’ve got news for them: it’s all difficult. Everything worth doing takes effort, and a lot of it. I wanted to manage Broadway shows. I wanted to learn how to be a fundraiser. I wanted to be a product developer who works with new technology. I wanted to move to New York City, and I really wanted to live on the Upper West Side, which always was my favorite neighborhood in New York (and remains so today). I wanted to adopt a dog. I wanted to travel, teach yoga, and be a writer. None of that is easy; it all takes effort and a lot of people told me that each and every one of those things just wouldn’t happen for me for one reason or another. I took their feedback and kept going.

I did all of those things and then some, and not because I have some kind of extraordinary talent. I did them out of dogged determination. I was stubborn and I just wouldn’t give up. If I could stay focused on the action, then I knew the result would follow. Sometimes it took longer than I thought it would. Sometimes I got what I wanted, and then realized it wasn’t all that it was cracked up to be. Sometimes I had to make trade-offs. But I tried and tried and tried again. No silver bullet. No magic formula. Hard work was enough; it always is. Eventually, even a mountain yields to constant, flowing water.

books, gratitude, women, work

Beginning: The Prize of Honesty

Christa Avampato

“It pays to be honest, but it’s slow pay.” ~ Proverb via Tiny Buddha

I recently met a new colleague who shares a lot of the sentiments I have about yoga, meditation, and what really matters in life. It was a refreshing introduction and a reminder that wherever you are, there are like minds. You may need to draw them out by trumpeting your own beliefs. As Clarissa Pinkola Estes said so beautifully, “She who does not howl will never find her pack.”

This path of finding your pack is not easy. It requires courage and faith. You will be asked to think and act like every one around you. You will have to be brave to be authentic. You will be told that thinking and acting like everyone around you is what you need to do to get ahead when the truth is a that thinking and acting like everyone else is a farce. That group persona doesn’t represent the persona of any individual member. It’s a vague meet-in-the-middle, mediocre compromise. And it doesn’t serve anyone well.

My advice, as I’ve given before, is to Be on Record. Be respectful of your environment while also being who you are. Listen and then speak up. Yes, honesty yields slow pay, but it carries a greater guarantee of a purposeful life in the long run. Steady, and authentic, wins the race.

career, integrity, SXSW, work

Beginning: Be on Record

Christa Avampato

At SXSW I had the great accidental pleasure of hearing Gary Vaynerchuk speak. To be honest, I had no idea who he was until SXSW. He was making an appearance at an event I went to early on at SXSW and I like the title of his new book, The Thank You Economy. During one time block at SXSW I wasn’t quite sure which session to go to and when I saw Gary was giving a keynote, I decided to go over and check it out. I didn’t know that I’d be in for such a treat of a stand-up comedy routine coupled with good sound business advice that I’ve been truly taking to heart for the past decade. Gary’s talk was a great validation of the way that I’ve approached having an opinion in the workplace: “Be on Record.”

Lessons from Broadway
When I was in my early 20’s, I was one of the first people hired to put together the Broadway show The Full Monty. There’s a lot of excitement around a new show; everyone is optimistic and the sky’s the limit. Immediately upon the Broadway opening, we started putting a tour together. Contrary to trends at the time, our booking agent was setting up 3-6 month sit downs in very large markets like LA, D.C., Philly, and Chicago. This made me nervous. I was a fan of doing shorter runs, selling them out, and then returning to the city at a later date to cash in on the first success. It’s a more conservative approach and I felt badly being a naysayer to the excitement of the tour beginnings so I became a no-sayer, meaning I shut my mouth and just went along with everyone else’s opinion to book the long engagements.

The situation goes south
As the tour got going, the long engagement idea was not going well. We couldn’t sell enough seats in Toronto, our first stop, so we had to schedule a few weeks of lay-off before heading to Chicago, our second city. During our run in Chicago, the September 11th tragedy struck and the bottom fell out of the theatre industry. The show was canceled and would not be sent out again until the following summer, with new producers and many of the actors, crew, and logistics switched up. And shorter engagements. While the producers cast the blame to the tragedy of September 11th, that was only an easy scapegoat. Truthfully, we couldn’t make the long stays work because we couldn’t sell enough tickets in advance of each city. The engagements needed to be shorter. I was right, and got no credit for my opinion because I didn’t say a word as the tour was being set up. I was just an employee following orders. At the ripe old age of 25 I learned a very valuable lesson that a decade later is more relevant in my life than ever. Being on record, even if my opinion isn’t shared by anyone else, is a valuable thing to do.

A second chance to learn a lesson
The Universe has a way of testing us. My friends Derek has said to me that the Universe is a very generous place – it gives us the same lesson over and over again until we learn it and don’t need to go through it any more. The Universe gave me another go this week when someone asked me to get the IP of a start-up I work with so that I could pass that IP on to a corporation that would build the exact same capability in-house and not need to pay the start-up for a partnership. I could have done it, lost my personal integrity, and been praised for a job well done. I didn’t. I went on record saying that I wouldn’t do that to the start-up who was working so hard to get a very good idea to take hold. They needed to be compensated for their IP. It didn’t win me any points with the powers that be, but I got to keep my integrity and sleep well at night.

And a third chance to make sure the lesson really sticks
Then the very next day I was asked to talk about a recent service that my company launched that I frankly find embarrassing. The customer experience is awful and it’s just a copycat of a service that one of our competitors has. For over a year I have been on record about how the service should have been fixed before being launched to the public. Either the feedback fell on deaf ears or they just disagreed with me. Regardless of the reason, when I read the analyst reports and blogs and was asked to comment on the launch at my staff meeting, I felt vindicated. The analysts and heavy-hitting blog writers said the same things I’ve been saying for over a year. I didn’t resort to a childish “I told you so” but felt that I could speak from a place of confidence because I have been on record with my opinions for many months. And again, I could also keep my integrity and sleep well at night.

The trade-offs of being on record
At the outset, it can be hard to be on record. It’s sometimes not a popular move. It can certainly stall your career at a company or get you fired if people in power don’t like your opinion. I’m okay with that. I’d rather be a person of conviction than a person who just says, “yes, sir” and falls in a line not of my own making. Mine is a more difficult road. Sometimes it’s lonely, and in the short-term it may not earn me a spectacular salary or a fancy title. However, when it’s all said and done I’d rather have to walk away having said my piece than get a seat at the table where everyone just nods in agreement. Integrity isn’t a trait; it’s a choice we make every day, at every moment.

choices, courage, decision-making, work, yoga

Beginning: No Need For Fear When You’re on the Path

Christa Avampato

“I am not afraid…I was born to do this.” ~ Joan of Arc via @FamousWomen

A few weeks ago, I wrote about a small message I have been starting to hear during my meditations. It seemed to have some sense of urgency though I couldn’t quite interpret the message. I spoke with my life coach, Brian, about it and he assured me that when the message was ready, it would surface. When I needed to act, it would spur me to do what I needed to do.

For some time, I’ve been contemplating some changes in my life, on the career front and on the personal front. In the past few months I’ve been increasingly clear about want to use yoga as a therapeutic practice in situation where yoga is not typically utilized, mainly in hospitals and treatment facilities of one kind or another. On Monday morning, though I woke up with a terribly sore throat, my head was clearer than it’s been in weeks. And that little message I was hearing in my meditation was no longer far away, but right beside me. “Now is the time.”

1.) Yoga – By a wonderful spell of synchronicity, I found two trainings coming up in New York City that I’d like to do.

One at Integral Yoga Institute that focuses on Yoga Therapy, taught by the incredible Cheri Clampett and Arturo Peal. Cheri is the Founder of the White Lotus Foundation in Santa Barbara and a pioneer in using yoga as part of a holistic treatment plan for cancer patients.

It’s time to take the next step in my overall yoga teacher training and pursue my 500-hour qualification. After doing a lot of research and asking a lot of questions, I’m nearly settled on applying to study with Alan Finger at ISHTA, which has a very strong focus on yoga for therapeutic purposes.

I’ll also be attending the Integrative Healthcare Symposium at the New York Hilton on Friday. There I will have the chance to connect with a number of people involved in the integrative healthcare movement, of which yoga plays a very important role.

2.) New professional pursuits – For some time I’ve considered taking some decisive action to take my career in a new direction. After months of teetering between the choice of whether to play it safe or step out of the box, I’ve decided to begin the process of leaving the box behind. More to come as that journey progresses. As soon as I have a solid sense of where that journey leads, you’ll be the first to know!

3.) Be open to a life that’s less structured – This is another message that’s been popping up for me. Increasingly, many of the people I know are breaking out of a traditional work lifestyle. Some going freelance, some becoming consultants, and some taking a variety of contract positions rather than the more traditional day job route. It’s intriguing, a little scary, though I don’t know a single one of them who’s unhappy with this less structured life. Maybe that will be the route for me, too.

There isn’t any fear admist these upcoming changes because I know they’re the right ones for me. Joan of Arc knew what she was talking about.

This blog is also available as a podcast on Cinch and iTunes.

finance, money, work

Beginning: Worthy Work

Christa Avampato

This post is available as a podcast on Cinch and iTunes.

“Far and away the best prize that life has to offer is the chance to work hard at work worth doing.” ~ Theodore Roosevelt

“Is that really going to help you make enough money?” a friend recently asked me about my business, Compass Yoga. I didn’t get my yoga teacher training nor did I start my company in order to quit my job and make my entire income from it. The intention was, and continues to be, to do something that made my time worthwhile. The job I do for money is fine. I work with nice people, I have some flexibility in my schedule, it’s helping me pay down my school loans, and I have the chance to learn about new technologies and market innovations. It’s not the work of my life, but it makes my life’s work possible under my current circumstances.

My friend, Amy, recently told me about a book called Your Money Or Your Life. I haven’t read it yet but it’s on order through Amazon. Since I work in financial services and have always been fascinated by the psychology of money (mostly because I grew up with very few financial resources), I’m looking forward to exploring the framework. The premise of the book is this: where are you trying to go, how much do you need to get there, and what plan can you put in place right now with the income you have to get you to that point, whatever that point is? Its authors put forward the idea that it is okay to have a job that makes you money to pour into your passions. They give readers permission to separate their financial life and the work that they are most passionate about.

Now, if you are making money from your greatest passion, then I applaud you. (Please tell me how it’s going, too!) Your Money or Your Life, and this post, are for those of us who are grappling with having a job that makes us some good money but doesn’t necessarily light our fire the way our other interests do. I spoke a bit about this for my interview with Liz Massey on Creative Liberty. I spent the early part of my career working in theatre. By all accounts I had exactly the job I wanted. The trouble with that job was I worked so many hours, often without good pay, that is wore me down and actually made me hate the theatre. After I left my last theatre job, I didn’t go see a show for over a year. Now I love going to the theatre — I needed to make my money some place else so I could actually fall in love with my passion again.

I’m not in any way suggesting that you run out and make lots of money doing something you hate because your passions won’t pay you well. Not at all. What I am saying is that making money doing what you love can seem like nirvana from a far and be less than satisfying up close. I also believe that making money doing what we love can be an incremental process, and progress in increments is more than fine. Every journey really is made by putting one foot in front of the other, however long that journey may take.

This blog is part of the 2011 WordPress Post Every Day Challenge.