There are plenty of people out there playing pundit about the fate of Apple now that Steve Jobs has stepped down. When I heard about his resignation, I at first felt a real sadness and then my attention quickly turned to gratitude for what he gave to all of us. While Apple and its team have drawn so much benefit from his leadership, I also realized that just by watching and studying him and interacting with the products and staff of his company we have gained so much. We owe him so many thank yous.
Here is a start:
Never give up; rely on your intuition – After his board sent him packing, it would have been very easy for Jobs to slunk off into obscurity. Instead, he started another company and invested in this little start-up called Pixar. Jobs trusts his gut above all else, and that authenticity that “knowing beyond knowing” has paid off in spades for me, albeit spades that have been hard-won.
Be unreasonable – There are several business legends about how infamously unreasonable Steve Jobs is. He is a relentless, restless seeker of quality and he demands of everyone else what he demands of himself – excellence.
People don’t know what they want and we can’t expect them to – If Apple got bogged down in consumer product testing and consumer product research, it’s unlikely that we’d have any of the magic Apple has built its brand on. In a time of user-generated content / input craze, Apple took a completely different approach – its products shaped the desires of consumers rather than the other way around.
Invent by alleviating pain – Apple has always paid close attention to what gives consumers pain, and then invented products and services to alleviate it. It is a brilliant point-of-view from which to invent, and it has won them consumer loyalty by the boatload.
Everything is possible; you can make something out of nothing – Jobs took his interest in personal technology, got out a white piece of paper and built Apple from nothing but a handful of computer components. For any entrepreneur with little more than a dream, Steve Jobs shows us what’s possible with passion.
Our future really is in our hands – I suppose Steve Jobs could have played it safe as a young man and gotten a job working for someone else. Instead, he paved his own road from the very beginning and never looked back. He knew his future was actually safer (and more fun!) in his own hands rather than in anyone else’s. His story will be one that’s told and emulated for many generations to come. I can’t wait to see all of the new Steves that spring from his inspiring path.
I am blessed with a life filled with inspiring friends. I love to feature the important work they’re doing out in the world. Today’s features fall to Monica McCarthy and Sara Alvarez, two women finding their voices through their writing and their practice as coaches.
Monica McCarthy with pup, KenyaMonica McCarthy, the Lifestylista One of her mantras: “It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.” ~ e.e. cummings
Monica and I met through Twitter. I was heading out to a Meetup for Tech Nerds and Monica tweeted me that it sounded interesting. I invited her to join me, and we’ve been karma pals ever since. While she’s been blogging for quite some time, she has recently revamped the blog as one piece of her broader life coaching site. Monica’s mission to help creative professionals and entrepreneurs craft lives they love.
On her gorgeous site, she officially describes herself as “a Certified Holistic Health Coach, Recovering Actor, Writer, Speaker, and proud pup parent (isn’t she pretty?) with no plans of retiring. Ever.”
Though these are the parts of her self-description that I love the most and explains why we were such fast friends:
“I Feel most alive when I trust my intuition.
I Dream of having a second home in France where I ride my bicycle to the café to read and eat my daily chocolate croissant.
I Fear mediocrity.
I Lust after all things travel and have been fortunate enough to live/work/perform in Germany/London/Scotland/Japan.
I Drink Green juice, Joe’s iced coffee, Malbec, and Guinness with equal fervor
I went from bartender to Broadway to being my own boss.
I met Sara through yoga teacher training at Sonic Yoga and since then she has proven to be a bright, shiny, supportive light in my life. She recently completed her Holistic Health Practitioner certification and started a blog called Blissful Brides where she “tracks her personal experience as a Yoga teacher, Holistic Health Coach, and BRIDE.” Her business provides yoga and holistic health counseling for artists and professionals. With a heart as big as her home state of Texas, she is “dedicated to helping others follow their bliss and learn to make healthier lifestyle choices which will empower them to succeed in every aspect of life.”
Sara’s focus on a wellness plan that is “flexible, fun, and rewarding” makes her the perfect choice for people not only looking to improve their nutrition, but to also improve their lives.
I’m mighty proud to have these two ladies in my life, and I hope you’ll take the time to get to know them, too.
Front view of Heidi's“Here are your waters and your watering place. Drink and be whole again beyond confusion.” ~ Robert Frost, seen on the chalk board over the bar at Heidi’s House by the Side of the Road
I went to Heidi’s House by the Side of the Road last week with a small group of friends. It’s not an actual house but an adorable niche that serves tremendous wine and some of the most delicious food I’ve had in a long time. Every nook and cranny of Heidi’s in jam-packed with love, care, and concern. The attention to detail is extraordinary. Heidi herself made sure of it.
Even the name has a heart-felt meaning. In the bathroom there is a needle point that states, “Let me live in my house by the side of the road and be a friend to a man.” It’s a quote by Sam Walter Foss. I asked Heidi why that quote means so much to her that she’d name her business after it. She told me, “It’s the quote on my father’s grave stone.” Gulp. I got goosebumps.
It got me thinking about how important it is to put love into our endeavors, how much of a difference that makes to the people who get to share in your creation. We taste love in food, we hear it in music, and we see it in art. It has this unmistakable and yet unexplainable quality that is universal.
Take a spin over to Heidi’s and see what I mean. Then get cracking on your own creation of love, and let others share in it the way Heidi does.
Matthew Sanford“I have never seen anyone truly become more aware of his or her body without also becoming more compassionate.” ~ Matthew Sanford, yoga teacher and author Waking: A Memoir of Trauma and Transcendence
My Uncle Tom recently recommended Matthew Sanford to me after hearing him speak. Given my devotion to yoga and my desire to use it to serve the healing of those who are working through trauma, he thought Matthew’s story and message would immediately resonate with me. My uncle knows me well. Upon reading his website and getting only a small glimpse into his experience, I was entranced.I felt like I really needed to hear this story at this moment and connect with Matthew.
So it was a wonderful and synchronous surprise that Matthew is in town for the New York Yoga Journal Conference. He gave a talk yesterday that was open to the public – many thanks to my pal, Yogadork, for cluing me into the event. I had no idea he would be speaking in town and would have been so upset if I had missed the opportunity to hear him talk about his personal and professional work with trauma. Much to my delight, he was even more intriguing and engaging in person than he is in his book. I didn’t think this was possible because I loved the book so much. I could hardly believe it. It’s like hearing a musician who sounds even better in person than he does on his hit album.
I sat with my friend, Erica, of Yogoer fame, and she described Matthew’s style perfectly. “He sifted through so much information that I have in my own mind and didn’t know how to articulate.” His words are poignant, authentic, and perfectly selected without feeling rehearsed. All without notes, nor a single pause or “um”. I could have listened to him all afternoon. My only disappointment was that his hour-long talk passed too quickly.
He discussed his area of expertise – the depth and breadth of the mind-body connection and its ability, when fully manifested in each of us, to change the world. He explained how important it is for our own happiness and for the good of the world for each of us to move in so that we can move out. The answers to all our challenges are within us already, no outside resource necessary. We know what to do, if only we would take the time to listen to the wisdom in our own bodies, in our own hearts. We have the ability to alter our own reality, and the greater world around us, by redefining our experience in this very moment. We have the ability, right now, to change everything. “The principles of yoga don’t discriminate,” Matthew said. How true that is. If you can breathe, just breathe, you can access all of the wisdom that yoga has to give.
My favorite sentiment from Matthew’s book is the connection he draws between awareness and compassion. I am particularly drawn to this idea because of my one word purpose that I’ve been working with this year: awareness. When I heard Dr. Chopra speak earlier this year, he inspired me to go looking for this one word purpose as a direction for all of my work. Awareness, to wake up and help others do the same, rose to the top.
Matthew and his story helped me make the next leap on my journey. What do I do once I wake up, once I can be fully aware at every moment? What is the point of attaining awareness? My compassion will grow as a result. And with compassion, real healing begins. As Matthew so brilliantly stated, “Compassion gives us a way to sit with suffering and not try to fix it.” And if we can sit with suffering long enough, we will find that it begins to dissipate on its own without a threat of returning. By being present with suffering, we give it a container to empty into and then we can melt it down, taking only its lessons with us and releasing the pain and confusion it causes.
Letting go takes time; compassion achieved through awareness gives us the necessary patience to allow for the process of letting go to progress. It gives us the time we need, for our own healing and to help others heal, too.
For more information about Matthew and his work, visit his website.
“The only way to pass any test is to take the test. It is inevitable.” ~ Elder Regal Black Swan, leader of “the Real People”
My friend, Pam, was a private yoga client of mine. For her Christmas present she wanted more yoga in her life and her lovely mom graciously made that possible. Pam and I have known each other since we were in elementary school and reconnecting with her through yoga was a wonderful treat!
After our last session, Pam sent me the book Mutant Message Down Under, the story of an American woman who travels barefoot on 1,400 mile walk-about through the Australian Outback accompanied by “the Real People”. They are an aboriginal tribe who live off the land for all of their vital needs. Whether the story is true or mythical is one of the most fascinating parts of the book. Marlo Morgan describes the story as truth, though fully acknowledges that the Australian government does not believe the events ever happened because they have no record of “the Real People” and Marlo Morgan refuses to introduce the two parties in an effort to protect “the Real People” and their way of life. The result is an incredibly wise tale so mythical that we also wonder if it is really possible.
To begin the adventure, “the Real People” explain that they have decided to remove themselves and their 50,000-year history from this planet. They believe they have done what they can do to help this world along, and that the time has come for them to leave. They will not create any more offspring so that when the last of their tribe passes away, they will all be gone. They have invited Marlo Morgan to Australia so that she will share their story and their belief system with a wider audience.
Their lessons are so simple and yet so powerful. They show Marlo how there is no separation between their souls – they regularly speak via telepathy. They show her the balance they obtain on a daily basis between courage and compassion, challenge and empathy. They are not beings living on the Earth, but rather a part of a cohesive whole. The wisdom within their own minds and hearts is an extension of the wisdom offered to all of us every day by our natural world. There is no need for them to ask for guidance on anything because guidance is always with them, within them. They teach us that it’s within us, too.
The part of the book that resonates with me most is the quest and fulfillment of purpose. Not what job you’re meant to have, or place you’re meant to live, but real purpose. When you crossover from this existence in this body to the next plane, what handful of words will be used to describe who you are. This is the only work of “the Real People” – to find and live their purpose, to know, understand, and experience their one true gift. To solidify this purpose, they give themselves a new name once their purpose is discovered. Marlo Morgan, in honor of “the Real People”, gives herself the name Traveling Tongue.
It’s a notion worthy of everyone’s contemplation. When we peel away our titles, our belongings, and our accomplishments, who are we? What name would we give ourselves? What is the singular purpose that threads through our existence this time around?
Matthew SanfordAs a yoga teacher, I’m very interested in getting involved with trauma recovery. I have some personal experience with post-traumatic stress disorder having endured it for a period of a few months following a fire that happened in my apartment building in September 2009. My experience doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface of the trauma that so many people go through not for months, but years, decades, lifetimes. My yoga and meditation practices have been with me now for over a decade, and they have never failed me. They helped me forgive, others and myself. They helped me grow and thrive, when I thought my very best hope was only to survive from day-to-day. Now having experienced their tremendous power, I want to gift them to others as a way of paying forward my gratitude.
My Uncle Tom recently sent me the URL for Matthew Sanford’s site. I had never heard of Matthew but from the moment I read the first line of his story I knew he would become a teacher for me: “It took a devastating car accident, paralysis from the chest down, and dependence on a wheelchair before I truly realized the importance of waking both my mind and my body.” Now a yoga teacher, author, speaker, nonprofit founder, and sustainable investor, Matthew’s wisdom gained from his own experience is transformative for anyone who comes into contact with him through any medium. He shares his own traumatic and harrowing story of tragedy and redemption, and how that journey brought him true awareness.
I encourage you to take a look at his website, read his book, and attend one of his events. He has much to share and we have much to learn.
The city of Austin has a very cool motto: “Keep Austin weird.” I love that. They embrace their quirkiness, their mix of business, creativity, music, wholesome living, and Texas pride. It is an odd mix, and I am so glad that I got to witness the weirdness in all its forms at this year’s SXSW festival. The friendly, open nature of Austin dwellers combined with all of the interested and interesting attendees of SXSW made for a week that exceeded every expectation I had by 10 fold. And I am demanding and full of high expectations.
My friend, Amanda, who was also here in Austin presenting with her husband, Jordan, mentioned to me several times that I appeared to be so light here. And I felt that, too. In New York I sometimes feel like I juggle so many hats that never quite fit together neatly – yoga, writing, technology, business. I always feel like I’m wearing 1 or 2 at a time, with the others safely tucked away until needed. At SXSW, I felt like I could wear them all in a very authentic way. There was some kind of shift that happened within me. Maybe that’s a result of being inspired at every turn by all of the incredible learning that I knew was always waiting for me wherever I went. Maybe this shift was available all of the time and in my daily life in New York I just couldn’t realize it.
In the coming weeks as I sort through my notes and collected business cards, I will be posting on this blog all of the insights and inspirations that I found at SXSW. What’s on my mind at this moment is how to keep this same light feeling that Amanda so eloquently described as I get back to normal life in New York. I’m certain that it’s possible. Now I just need to find the path forward.
“The happiest people don’t necessarily have the best of everything but they make the most of everything.” ~ Anonymous
This quote was posted on Twitter last week by @FamousWomen and retweeted by Kimberly Wilson, a yoga teacher I follow. I read it on a day just after hearing a friend of mine confess how small her life felt. She’s in a tough place at the moment, facing a lot of challenges that she doesn’t want to face because they’re painful and scary and overwhelming. Throughout the conversation I heard her lament about all of the things she doesn’t have and wants. I listened, though felt at a loss for words.
Twitter to the rescue
On the way home from seeing my friend, I scrolled through Twitter on my phone and found Kimberly’s tweet at just the right moment. We live in a society of deficits. We constantly obsess about what we don’t have and what we don’t feel. Money, material goods, time, space, fulfillment, peace. We want more and more, though when we get more where does it really lead us? Along the same circuit of attachment and attainment. Something wonderful happens, something we supposedly really wanted, and we barely give it a glance before we’re on to the next to-do list. That’s a lose-lose game.
Knowing how to really live
Whoever coined the quote above really knew how to live. There’s so much more joy to be found in being happy with what we have as opposed to striving for what we think we want. And that doesn’t mean settling and losing our ambition. I’m all for ambition and I’ve got it in spades.
Lately I’ve been feeling the soft and constant presence of true gratitude in my life. Thankfulness for my family and friends. For my apartment, as small as it may be, and my job. My yoga, writing, and art. My freedom and courage and strength and confidence that took so long to cultivate and really own. I live a blesses existence, despite its frustrations, set-backs, and disappointments. Those moments are a miniscule minority compared to the incredible number of opportunities and moments of happiness that are accessible to me all the time.
So that’s the message I’m going to give to my friend. Take the time and list out, on paper or simply in our mind’s eye, just how much you have, not what you lack. The more often we actively give thanks, the more we have to give thanks for.
Has that been your experience? Have you ever felt like you had nothing left to be happy about, and if so, how did you pull through?
This blog is also available as a podcast on Cinch and iTunes.
This post is available as a podcast on Cinch and iTunes.
“Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.” ~ MLK via CharlesMBlow
Charles M. Blow is The New York Times’s visual Op-Ed columnist. His column appears every Saturday.
“Dr. King delivered the “I have a dream” speech at age 34 and lived only 39 years.” ~ via Drew Allen
I read these two tweets on Monday morning with so much gratitude and then so much awe for the person Dr. King was and the person that he asked all of us to be. He was the age I am now when he delivered the I Have a Dream speech and his life was cut far too short only 5 years later. Those two pieces of information weigh heavy on my heart, particularly when I consider how far we still have to go to create a more peaceful society where everyone, regardless of race, creed, gender, personal economics, or upbringing, can advance through hard work and determination.
Coincidentally I am now reading Condoleezza Rice’s book, Extraordinary, Ordinary People, which reminds me of how much hope we have in our society. While I don’t agree with her politics, the inspiration of her story can’t be denied. She grew up in pre-Civil Rights Birmingham and rose to be one of the most influential people in the world because of her hard-won education. She has a quote in the book that hit me like a ton of bricks because of the courage and passion it coveys. She says of her parents, “Somehow they raised their little girl in Jim Crow Birmingham to believe that even if she couldn’t have a hamburger at the Woolworth’s lunch counter, she could be President of the United States.”
I understand her fervent belief in education. I grew up in a family that didn’t have a lot of money but believed in education. I studied hard, worked hard, and pushed myself, sometimes far beyond my limits, because even at an early age I knew that my education would improve the quality of my life in the long run. That bet, that long, sometimes-difficult-to-believe-in bet, paid off. My education, and the will it took to get it, are two things that I am incredibly grateful for every day. I live a really good life as a result of my education. I like to share that story, particularly with children, through my volunteer work. It gives them some hope to meet a real life person who understands where they are and where they can get to by working hard.
In the spirit of Dr. King, we need to share our stories through every channel we’ve got. We must continue to talk about what’s important to us and what matters. And we must do so without ever really knowing how or when or why it will affect someone else. Martin Luther King Day reminds us why it is so important to speak our minds and then live accordingly – because it makes a difference.
Lauren Murray is striking back against the idea that our economy has ruined all of us.
Christa Avampato 