I tell wonder-filled stories about hope and healing
It’s not an exaggeration to say that Oliver Sacks changed my life. His work and books showed me that curiosity is a gift that we must use, cherish, and never limit. He is and always will be my example of a life well-lived. He passed away early this morning in his home in New York City, and his obituary as well as his many decades of writing are worth reading over and over again. Rest in peace to a doctor and writer who embodied the very essence of passion and grace.
“You are not responsible for fixing everything that is broken…It’s time to replenish.”
My yoga teacher, Cheri, posted this quote this week and it really resonated with me. I was in the midst of a wild week and a replenishing weekend seemed light years away. Now that it’s here, I plan to take full advantage of it through art, writing, music, resting, exploring, and laughing.
We are all adults, and adults are equipped to create and be responsible for their own happiness. Here’s our only charge: to make sure we are well-cared for so that we can be at our best to make the most of what comes our way.
“Saying ‘yes’ begins things. Saying ‘yes’ is how things grow.” ~Stephen Colbert
Yes, I’ll have the conversation. Yes, I’ll try this and see how it goes. Yes, I’ll work on this. These are powerful statements that foster our learning. Every great adventure starts with yes. It’s the recognition that we are willing to be present, to have an experience that will somehow change us. Everything I’ve ever done in my life that I’m truly proud of started with those three little letters. What’s your greatest yes moment?
I watched Jimmy Carter’s press conference about his cancer diagnosis. The statement of his that struck me the most was his philosophy about expectations: hope for the best and accept what comes. It’s a beautiful way to live. Watch his full press conference through the link below:
“Live the full life of the mind, exhilarated by new ideas, intoxicated by the romance of the unusual.” ~Ernest Hemingway
I’ve been in my job for almost 4 months and in D.C. for 6 months. Now that I’m getting my groove back, I’m going to spend the Fall exploring. Here’s what I’ll be up to:
What new things are you trying this Fall?
A few days ago I got an email that really irked me. I had worked hard on a project and written a thoughtful response to advise someone who asked me to examine a company he’s thinking of buying. Though delivered professionally and courteously, I knew that the news I was giving him was not the news he wanted. I couldn’t in good conscience advise him to buy the company. From the data and from my gut, I know he’ll regret the choice to buy it if he moves ahead. Rather than taking the advice, he felt the need to criticize my analysis in a snarky way.
At first, I was upset about his response and then I had to let it go. I had done the job I was asked to do. I was honest and careful in my analysis, and now he can either take the advice or not. Rather than wasting energy being upset about his email, I plowed the energy into my own creative work. And that was the very best thing I could do. We live, and we learn.
Yesterday I was talking to my therapist, Brian. I explained that while I’m proud of all of the personal work we’ve done that I still have so many things about myself that I want to improve, situations I’d like to handle with more grace, and areas of my life that I’d like to fix. He got quiet and said one of his magical phrases: “Let me give you a framework that I think will resonate with you. Working on yourself is a gift.” And that’s exactly what I needed to hear.
Most people never dig down into who they are. They stroll though life and get by, but don’t actually ever live. And I don’t blame them one bit – working on who we are and improving our character is the hardest work we can do because it forces us to see what we don’t like. And once we see it, we can’t unsee it. We actually have to do something about it. We have to change, and change is hard.
In the times when that work is most difficult, when we’re really looking at ourselves honestly to see ourselves in our entirety—the good, the bad, and the ugly—this kind of framework helps. It’s not easy nor comfortable for anyone to engage in self-improvement. But it’s worth it to see our grace grow. It’s worth it to see kindness and compassion trumping inferior actions. It’s worth it to hear the ego’s opinion and let it recede. We benefit from this work, and the world around us benefits, too. Everyone we come into contact with in any capacity is impacted by the work we do on ourselves. It’s the gift that keeps on giving to everyone. It’s a form of service. Yes, we’ve got to work for it, and with time and dedication it works for us, too.
So if you’re deep in the weeds of self-improvement and trying to figure out how to hack your way through the tangled jungle of fear, doubt, and frustration, just know that I’m right there with you. We can and will do this together.
“Everyone has inside of him a piece of good news.” ~Anne Frank
The level of stress in my life has been on the high side recently, and this quote from Anne Frank has been a light post for me. There is always some light, somewhere. When I’m struggling, I find that light in wonderful friends who listen and support me. When I’m facing a difficult project, I look to my coworkers and collaborators to help me puzzle my way through it. (And when it’s really rough, I rely on a snuggle from Phin!) In those darker moments, the good news resides with the good people in my life. And for that, I’m always grateful.
Last night I went to The Pancakes & Booze Art Show in D.C. My friends and I arrived as soon as the doors open and already there were lines down the block. We were thrilled by the excitement and support of local D.C. artists. I fell in love with the photography of CJ Bown, a Philadelphia-based artist, and picked up a canvas of his stunning view of the stairs to Bethesda Fountain in New York City. It’s one of my favorite places in the world and CJ captured it from such a stunning viewpoint. It’s now happily hanging in my home and I can’t stop looking at it. Something tells me I’m going to license this photo to be on the cover of my novel, Where the Light Enters.
“Don’t let your learning lead to knowledge. Let your learning lead to action.” ~Jim Rohn
A friend of mine recently asked me if she could pay me to help her rewrite her resume. Another asked me if he could pay me to help him craft a cover letter. I turned them both down. I offered to do it for nothing. I’ve been very fortunate in my life to have so many people who have helped me along my path, especially when I was down and out. I could spend my entire life paying forward those favors and it won’t ever be enough. I’ve been blessed by a lot of angels.
The knowledge I’ve gained from my many experience has given me a rich life. However, the true value of that knowledge isn’t in my ownership of it. The real value is revealed when I share it and use it to make my corner of the world a better place in the best way I know how. Take what you know and give it away. Let it be a light for others. In time it will come back to you in ways you never thought possible.
