I tell wonder-filled stories about hope and healing
“Within and without, the voice holds the key.” ~ Kara Johnstad
All projects need doing and listening. We observe the outside world and our own inner world. We hear and see what happens around us and then tune in to what is happening in our own hearts, bodies, minds, and spirits. To do our best work, we must have this balance. The place where the inner world and outer world meet is our greatest source of inspiration, where we realize that what we have to give is exactly what the world needs.
My friend, Jess, posted this article on Facebook and it bolstered my spirits. Here is the link to the full article and below are the 19 hard things you need to do to be successful. So much truth in these words!
“Keep your eyes open and your feet moving forward. You’ll find what you need.” Amaze yourself with just how much you can do, how much you do have, and everything that you can create. No more resources, courses, meetings, or plans that may or may not happen. No more wondering, whining, or wasting time. Now is your time. Just do it. Follow your instincts and make it happen. Whatever it is you want to have in your life. And not for the recognition, notoriety, or rewards that may or may not head your way as a result. Just because you want to and just because you can. I know you can and deep down you do, too. Toss aside any naysayers, your nagging inside voice included, and move ahead. One graceful, beautiful step at a time. You’ll be shocked by what happens next.
When the fire dies down, we don’t seal off the fireplace. We add a log. When the tires on our cars lose their tread, we don’t trade in the car. We get new tires. The same is true for our lives. We don’t toss away things that have a bit of wear and tear. We fix, clean, polish, replenish, repair, and renew them. Do the same with creative projects, work, relationships, a home, and anything else that matters. These things and these people have done a great service to us over time: they’ve made our lives richer and more meaningful. Let’s keep them going. Everything can be made new again.
Whenever something doesn’t work out in my favor, I don’t think of it as an opportunity lost but as a bullet dodged. This philosophy has never failed me, and over time it’s always proved to be true. I repeat this statement to myself: “The world has something better in mind for you. Be patient. Live. Have faith. Keep going.”
When we want to take a chance, when we want to do something new, we have to clear the way so the new can enter. This is exciting and it’s scary because we may have some time when this empty space just wants to house something. It may remain empty for a good long while before we actually figure out what belongs in that space. This is also a dangerous time. We may get so frustrated with that empty space that we feel tempted to fill it with something, anything. Don’t do it. Only fill it with something and / or someone you truly want.
Waiting is a tough business because we don’t know how long the waiting will last and we don’t know exactly what our options will eventually be. I don’t have those answers, but I do know this: we get what we settle for. So if we settle for something less than we want then that’s exactly what we’ll get – something that leaves us feeling empty even though we are full. Something that depletes us rather than building us up. Something that casts a shadow over our light rather than helping it to burn brighter. If that’s the choice, then I’m waiting. I’ll clear the way and hold that empty space for as long as it takes.
“Luck is being ready for the chance.” Every success I know of took both work and luck. What varies is the proportions of each. And don’t worry about trying to figure out how to calibrate them into the master combination. We can’t engineer it. We only control half of the ingredients. We can work hard. Luck is left to, well, luck. We can prepare to be lucky. I would argue that we must be prepared to recognize and then take full advantage of luck. But we don’t control the timing or the amount of luck we get. We also don’t get to choose the wrapper that our luck dons. It often doesn’t advertise itself. It shows up in the form of someone or something we weren’t looking for. That’s how luck rolls – to its own drummer and in its choice of costume.
So what can we do?
1.) I work harder than I need to. Often times my lucky breaks don’t require even half the work I put into them. I’m an over-preparer and I’ve made my peace with that because over-preparation gives me both confidence and wiggle room. And if by chance I fall short a bit short on the luck component, I can make up for it with extra work.
2.) I turn over every rock. I get a new client. I get a new writing gig. I meet a new person interested in my work. I keep going. I don’t stop when I get a modicum of success. I appreciate it and make the most of it, and I keep digging for more. Luck runs and out and we can replenish our supply if we keep going.
3.) I see everything as an opportunity. Everything. A trip to the grocery store. A walk with Phin. An article I read. Someone who shares something I do online. Every little thing has some element of magic. I never lose sight of that. And I try to be that source for someone else. I like to connect people. I like to tell them what I’m doing in the hopes that it helps them do something, too. Opportunity isn’t a linear path. It’s a circle and it goes round and round as long as we choose to keep it going.
Keep showing up. Keep working hard. Keep reaching. Don’t worry about searching for luck. It will find you when it’s good and ready.
“There is no elevator to success. You have to take the stairs.” Anyone can leap and make a change. What no one tells us is that deciding to leap and then actually doing it is only the beginning. The real work that gets us to where we want to be comes after the leap and it requires a lot of energy, time, and effort. We have to become builders. Sometimes we regret our leap because we weren’t prepared for all of the work ahead and because we didn’t know how much work we had to do before the leap. This is why I’m working on my book, Your Second Step: What to Do After You Leap. I made lots of mistakes and I did a lot of things right. I want to share all of that experience with anyone in the midst of the same kind of pursuit.
And here’s another tidbit that I hope makes you feel better if you’re feeling a bit stuck: you don’t jump from a full room into another full room when you strike out on your own, no matter how much pre-work you’ve done. You jump from a full room into empty space. For some of us that empty space, the blank page, is exhilarating. For some, it’s a terrifying nightmare. For me, it’s a bit of both. Building is difficult work. It’s also difficult to design what you plan to build. I hope my work can help people through this process. I hate seeing people give up on their dreams, especially when they have worked very hard to make them happen. I hope I can offer them enough encouragement to keep going.
This weekend, I took myself on a creative retreat inside my apartment. I didn’t make any plans and spent the entire time working on creative projects – writing, cooking, reading, and building. This is a new experiment for me and another New Year’s resolution. It was inspired by my time in California this summer where I took a creative sabbatical and wrote my play, Sing After Storms. It was such a life-affirming experience to devote all of my time to being creative and I wanted to find a way to keep that fire burning on a regular basis. I decided to try this experiment of taking one weekend / month to follow my creativity wherever it leads me. Here are the results:
– I wrote my blog posts for the week
– I worked on a series of images that pair inspiring photos with quotes from my blog.
– I contacted a number of different potential partners for Sing After Storms as I think about casting and staffing the show. I also started to build a comprehensive project plan for the show and it was a blast to put my producer hat back on after all these years. We also have a new updated website. Check it out by clicking here.
– I wrote and pitched a few different classes I’d like to teach at various outlets this year.
– I worked on a very short video project that’s been kicking around in my head for over a year.
– Did some cooking including my Golden Globes vegan cookies
– Which brings me to my favorite activity of the weekend…watching the Golden Globes, one of my favorite broadcasts of the year. Check out who I picked to win by clicking here.
Now it’s Monday and I’m off to a client site for the day followed by a drink with a wonderful friend of mine from my Amex days whom I haven’t seen in a very long time. It’s wonderful to be out there in the world getting things done. It’s also wonderful to spend some time in retreat and reflection so that we’re prepared to face and engage with the world. Yin and yang. We need both to inform and inspire our best work in both spheres. I think I’m going to make my creative retreats a regular part of my life.
Lena Dunham, the creator and star of Girls, and Sheldon Cooper, the quirky and maddening character played by actor Jim Parsons on The Big Bang Theory, have something in common and something powerful to teach us: commitment and focus create the magic sauce of achievement. It’s hard to imagine two people who are less alike and yet they arrive at the same conclusion when it comes to their work. They bet the farm and won.
Lena Dunham was on David Letterman this week. She was so funny and authentic that I decided to learn more about her career. She built her rising star through a web series, Delusional Downtown Divas, and SXSW Film. In 2009, SXSW Film screened her first feature film, Creative Nonfiction. In 2010, the same festival screened her second feature film, Tiny Furniture. Dunham wrote, directed, and starred in both films. Tiny Furniture earned two Independent Spirit Award nominations and that caught the attention of Producer Judd Apatow. Girls is the result of their collaboration; she creates, stars, and sometimes directs it while he serves as the Executive Producer.
Sheldon Cooper said something profound in this week’s episode, appropriately titled “The Occupation Recalibration”. His neighbor and friend, Penny, decides to quit her job as a waitress at the Cheesecake Factory to focus on her acting career. After five years in LA, she does much more waitressing than acting and she decides to give her near-impossible dream all of her attention. Sheldon supports this decision with one simple statement: “The best way to achieve a goal is to devote 100% of your time and energy to it. When I decided I was going to be a physicist, I didn’t take some other job in case it didn’t work out…We’re dreamers.”
Who says there’s nothing good on television? People who don’t watch television. There’s plenty of inspiration to be found in the content squeezed in-between expensive commercials. Lena and Sheldon are just two examples and they serve as powerful role models for all of us: if we really want to achieve a dream, we must double-down on it. There’s no guarantee of success, though focus gives us our best possible chance to make it come true.
* Tonight, The Big Bang Theory and Girls are competing for the Best Television Series – Comedy or Musical Golden Globe. Lena and Jim are both nominated for Best Actress and Actor, respectively.
Christa Avampato 