I believe in dreams, big and small. I believe that the only way to live, and I mean truly live not just exist, is to find a way to wake up every morning and have your first thought be, “Thank you for the opportunity of this day.”
My father passed away at a young age, long before he accomplished what he set out to do in life. In John Lennon’s beautiful words, he died with the music still in him. I learned a lot of lessons from his passing, and the most important is this: time waits for no one.
It took me longer to learn the unintended consequence of finding what you’re truly passionate about: once you know your passion, you have very little desire to do anything else. All of a sudden every moment you spend on something else begins to feel like time wasted, time that could have been spent more wisely and productively on your passion. It’s as if there’s a beautiful piano sitting in the corner, cased in glass. Lovely to look at, though not easily shared and certainly of little benefit to anyone else.
To sit down at that piano and play is to make use of your passion. And this is true too of the dream you have to start a company or program, to paint, to write, to serve a cause that’s important to you, to love. To be of real value, dreams must be brought into being, not just thought of and then shelved.
There is certainly the fear factor. It is frightening to say, “This is what I stand for, who I mean to be,” because there is no going back. Once you’ve actualized a dream, once you’ve defined it clearly for yourself, you must go do it or it literally chews you up. It haunts you, follows you around everywhere you go. There is no way to shake it loose except to grow numb. And numb is a frightening state in which to exist.
When my father passed away, he was numb on the outside and raging on the inside. He died a lonely, disappointed man. And the saddest part is that he had no one to blame in the end but himself. Yes, he faced horrendous and tremendously difficult obstacles. He struggled and somewhere along the way, long before I was around, I do believe that he tried very hard to bring the life he wanted to fruition. Then the light died; it went out of him and he became a person who lost his way.
I wish I could ask him how and why this happened, why he let the world beat him down. I wonder why he ultimately didn’t have the strength to keep going, to keep dreaming. I want to ask him why he couldn’t wake up until it was just too late.
It’s hard to live with these questions, ones that will never be answered, so instead I make meaning of his life by infusing meaning into mine. By living my passion of building and fostering healthy systems, I not only fulfill my dream for my own life; I also get the opportunity to fulfill my father’s, too. The other unintended and delightful consequence of living our passions is redemption.
Published by Christa Avampato
IN BRIEF
Author, journalist, digital product manager, and licensed New York City tour guide. Creator and host of NYC's Secrets and Lies. Alumna of the University of Pennsylvania (BA), the Darden School of Business at the University of Virginia (MBA), Arizona State University (Biomimicry), and the University of Cambridge (MSt in Sustainability Leadership).
I build digital media platforms, report on urban climate resilience and biodiversity, and produce live narrative experiences that connect communities to history, nature, and place.
THE DEEP DIVE
My work centers on a single thread: building systems and stories that foster deep connection to our shared world. Across digital streaming, environmental reporting, and live civic storytelling, I design experiences that help people understand complex ideas and the environments around them.
DIGITAL PRODUCT STRATEGY & MEDIA LEADERSHIP
At Carnegie Hall, I serve as Digital Product Manager, leading product strategy, operations, and technical delivery for the video streaming platform Carnegie Hall+. I translate artistic mission into scalable, high-performance streaming architecture that reaches audiences globally. Previously, I led agile product and delivery teams across operations and compliance at American Express, managed Broadway theatrical productions and national tours, and guided strategic initiatives across cultural institutions.
ENVIRONMENTAL JOURNALISM & AUTHORSHIP
As a freelance journalist, I investigate how living systems, urban infrastructure, and human culture intersect. My reported features on urban decarbonization, biodiversity, coastal resilience, and biomimicry appear in publications including Smithsonian Magazine, The Washington Post, Mongabay, Natural History Magazine, and Foreign Policy Magazine. In fiction, I write the Emerson Page young adult novel series, alongside upcoming historical fiction and nonfiction works on New York history, mythology, and human resilience. I also write Togetherhood, a LinkedIn newsletter focused on urban ecology and community restoration, and co-host the podcast Frameworks in the Wild.
LIVE EXPERIENCE & CIVIC STORYTELLING
As a licensed New York City tour guide and live event producer, I transform urban landscapes into shared narrative encounters. I created, produce, and host NYC's Secrets and Lies, an interactive live storytelling series staged across cultural landmarks including the New York Transit Museum, the South Street Seaport Museum, and the historic tall ship Wavertree. I also design and lead site-specific walking tours exploring coastal ecology, food history, and neighborhood evolution, often with partners at Climate Week NYC and the Natural Areas Conservancy.
DOUBLE OR NOTHING MEDIA
Through my independent production studio, Double or Nothing Media, I develop ventures across media, ecology, and public history:
Digital Products & Strategy: Architecting scalable digital platforms, streaming experiences, and operational models for mission-driven institutions.
Environmental Reporting & Publications: Delivering long-form reporting, books, and newsletters grounded in climate resilience and regenerative design.
Site-Specific Live Storytelling: Producing immersive live shows and educational walking tours that engage public audiences in community history.
CONNECT
Website & Production Hub: doubleornothingmedia.com and christaavampato.com
Newsletter: Togetherhood on LinkedIn - linkedin.com/newsletters/togetherhood-7273771832221089792/
Instagram & Threads: @christarosenyc
Emerson Page Novels: emersonpagebook.wordpress.com/
View all posts by Christa Avampato
I believe in dreams, big and small. I believe that the only way to live, and I mean truly live not just exist, is to find a way to wake up every morning and have your first thought be, “Thank you for the opportunity of this day.”
Yes yes yes on the unintended consequence. There is no “un-knowing”. I am so sorry for your dad’s pain and its ripple effects, so many must feel the same way – it’s painful to be that person and it’s painful to love someone in that pain. But for you to take and share the lessons you got from it may indeed fulfill part of his dream and the dream he probably had for you to be happy and fulfilled.
LikeLike
I’m hoping to be able to really help children who are in the same kind of situation I was in for so long. There’s so little done for them, and yet the life effects they face are tremendous. I really feel like I could have a huge positive impact in this area because of this experience. And maybe that’s the best way to make this experience mean something.
LikeLike
Christa,
You are a brave person with a big heart. This post was a real tear-jerker. It was difficult for me to read, but necessary for me to read.
I always had a hunch about your father: there was a saga there for sure, I thought, and now you are revealing more about it.
Thank you. We appreciate your honesty and transparency, but we are also here for you. I think those who read your blog posts are sort of like your “support group.” So, we appreciate you for just being you. At the same time, I feel sorry for what happened in your father’s life. I wish such a tragedy had not occured in your life, but what can you do? Sometimes, life is just not fair and we have all experienced it.
That’s life: we have to learn to take the good with the bad. But at least you learned from the experience. We all wish you much success and happiness in your own life and may you live your own dreams. Cheers.
LikeLike
That’s life indeed. Someday, though more personal growth work, I’m hoping to not only learn and transcend from these experience but also to somehow be grateful for their lessons. That would be my definition of “making it” and thanks to you and the others who are always here supporting and cheering me on. I couldn’t do this without you!
LikeLike
CRA – I have to agree with Archan: difficult to read! But so insightful. I’m going to be quoting your last line for years to come (mostly to myself!) Thank you for your opening yourself up that others (like me) can learn from those burdens you carry and have at least partially reconciled. You continue to inspire me!
LikeLike
Thanks, Lon. It was tough to write though so necessary. And our conversation that day inspired it.
LikeLike