Day: February 13, 2008

career, dreams, family

Dragon, Fish, and Chameleon in the Middle

Christa Avampato

Recently, I read a magazine advertisement by PricewaterhouseCoopers. Please put aside that this is a boring big 4 (or is it 5 or 6) accounting firm. The ad features a woman (in accounting?), Gail Vennitti, a principal at the company, explaining how her placement in the family line up – middle child – make her well-suited for her job. This is exciting to me. I am also a middle child, and most of the time the connotation of being in the middle is not good. To complicate matters, I was boring in the year of the Dragon, under the zodiac sign of Pisces, and on the Day of the Aerialist. I am by all accounts a dreamy-eyed wandered. Yikes! Who the heck am I???

Gail takes a unique spin on her middle child attribute. As middle children, Gail and I have at one time or another had to be all things to all people. We have to negotiate in a variety of situations – sometimes were the older child, and sometimes we’re the younger child. We are forced to be empathic; to operate in an ever changing world. We fight to be individuals, though recognize the value of being part of a group. In short, we grow comfortable with ambiguity at an alarming rate. Like chameleons we change ourselves to suit our situation, never once being disingenuous. We change when change is needed.

To complicate matters, my Piscean sign and Chinese year make me equally interested in art and science, with an intense imagination and a fierce sense of love and loyalty to causes and people I care about. I have passionate opinions, and love beautiful things. I have a somewhat split personality – there never seems to be an end in what interests me. I can fit in with a batch of surgeons, and in the same breathe address a crowd of cartoonists.

I used to be embarrassed by all of this. I wondered why I could never seem to have one defining interest, and people nearly always seemed confused by my dual-nature. As I get older, like Gail, I am beginning to see my duality as a bonus. It’s the ability to live in the world of the imagination with my feet firmly on the ground that I hope will ultimately lead toward a fulfilling and rewarding life with tangible results that at one time could only be dreamed of.

career, child, children, kids, Kidscreen Summit, retail, work

Kidscreen Summit Prep

Christa Avampato

I’m at home getting ready for the Kidscreen Summit, which begins tomorrow. Over 1330 companies in the field of youth entertainment will be represented and we will noodle through a number of issues to learn about new products, services, and ways of doing business. New technologies and entrepreneurs looking for a break will abound. I know I should be excited. Truthfully, I am terrified.

My fear stems from several things: 1.) my company has paid a fairly large amount of money to attend, and I am its sole representative at the Summit despite the fact that I’ve only been there for 7 months; 2.) as a result of #1, I feel a tremendous pressure to find something cool to bring back to validate the expense. This is not good – it’s kind of like working very hard only to get promoted or to make money. Wrong motivation = missed learnings and poor decisions; 3.) I’ve been in this field 7 months – seriously, what will I have to contribute in a conversation with people who have dedicated their entire lives to youth entertainment?

I hate fear; and I hate the feeling of stress it imbibes. I have to calm myself down. So let’s take these fears one at a time. 1.) though the money that was paid seems large to me, it’s within our budget, and for three days of learning that could give the company a competitive advantage, it’s a drop in the bucket. Check. 2.) There is cool stuff to be had – one only need to look at the agenda and list of exhibitors. I’ve have to be on another planet to miss all the cool stuff that will be available. 3.) I had this same fear when I started business school. In a finance class, what could I contribute coming from a nonprofit and theatre background in a room full of investment bankers. As it turns out, a lot. The beauty of tremendously complex fields, it turns out that no one has all the answers, regardless of how long they’ve worked in a field. Times change, and industries change with those times.

Okay, I feel a bit better. But what is really going to get me over my fear of this Summit – two things. First, I am pretty darn lucky to have a boss who believes in me enough to send me as a representative to this conference. Second, if wifi and an electric outlet are accessible, I’ll be live blogging from the Summit. It’s amazing how many fears can be dissipated if they can be formulated into a story. Check back tomorrow for the latest update….