Category: youth

health, productivity, time, youth

My Year of Hopefulness – Getting the Most Out of Your Days

Christa Avampato

“Don’t be fooled by the calendar. There are only as many days in the year as you make use of. One man gets only a week’s value out of a year while another man gets a full year’s value out of a week.” ~ Charles Richards

I am obsessed with productivity. (On occasion, I have spent an afternoon watching an Ace of Cakes marathon on the Food Network. Guilty as charged – what can I say? I love cake.) 95% of the time, I’m doing something that I hope will help move my life forward. Reading, writing, connecting with others, visiting museums, exercising, meditating, running, cooking, and observing life. I am an expert scheduler and I strive to be a model of efficiency.

So why is progress so important to me? Why can’t I just slow down and go with the flow? Why must I be constantly engaged? Part of it is that I am hopelessly nerdy and have been since birth. ‘Why?’ is my favorite question, and I ask it loud, proud, and often. It’s a reflex. I have an overwhelming desire to be in the know, or at least to try to be in the know. The words “I’m bored” have never crossed my mind, much less come out of my mouth.

The other reason for my constant activity is something more serious. For better or for worse, I am constantly mindful of my age and of the time that’s passing. Some people will say that those who are young don’t appreciate their youth or their health. They think they’ll be beautiful forever. I know it’s all fading. Every day I’m looking for a wrinkle, a grey hair, a loss of ability. My WebMD checking can get a bit out of hand from time to time. I was born thinking like an old person, so much so that I am often surprised to look in the mirror and see someone so young.

My siblings and I lost a lot of our family members at a very young age, and those losses stick with us. They changed us. As teenagers, we became painfully aware that life is finite, at least in the form in which we know it. And while I could easily become consumed by the fear of time passing by, instead I focus on making every moment count.

There’s a saying that goes something like “if you live a good life, you’ll be able to enjoy it twice: once as you’re living it when you’re young, and again when you’re looking back on it when you’re old.” Given my love of efficiency, this sounds like a great deal to me – I’ll get two good lives for the price of one! That’s well-worth the effort.

change, fear, youth

My Year of Hopefulness – Inspiration from our younger selves

Christa Avampato
“Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.” ~ Babe Ruth

I spent a number of years touring around the country with Broadway shows. I worked on the business side, taking care of everything from contracts to financial statement to company travel. Though I learned so much and enjoyed the job, I got tired of always being on the road. I wanted to live in a community and have a life outside of my job. My sister was also having some health issues, and I was really feeling the need to be with her. So I made a little deal with myself: as soon as I had $50,000 in the bank, I could leave, move to Florida with my sister, and figure out the rest from there. That was January 2003.

When I got to Florida, I spent time with my sister, took a few classes, and had the occasional odd job. And just when I needed a really good job, one miraculously showed up and it set me off on an entirely new path that lead to a move to Washington D.C., then to business school, and finally back to New York City. I just followed my heart every step of the way and made sure my bills were paid. Those were my only two requirements.

So now here I am at a crossroads again, though I’m finding myself unable to strike up a little deal the way I did back in 2003. In my heart, I am feeling a very strong need to write full-time, and yet that leap is much more frightening this time around. Now, it could be that my hesitation is caused by increased financial obligations (business school loans) and that the economy is in shambles. It could also be that, well, I’m scared now and I wasn’t then.

Today I had to remind my 33 year old self of my younger self, that brave, bold woman who was willing to take a risk, who was willing to bank on her ability to build her own path in life. How is it that I was so brave then and more timid now? It could have been foolishness or blind ignorance that made me so brave in 2003. It could be that I just wasn’t capable of doing anything except following my heart. It’s this later explanation that I’m banking on resurrecting.

Last Fall, I wrote a post based on an assignment that I did for business school. It’s a letter I wrote to my younger self. Now what I really need is my younger self to write a letter to me. I thought maybe a letter from my younger self would shake me awake, would give me some courage, would remind me of who I am and who I’d like to be. So here goes:

Dear Christa,
How did you get where you are? I remember when all you could think of was writing and performing and creating. And now when I think of how your days pass by, I wonder what happened. Your path from A to B was not linear. There were twists and turns. My guess is that while you are surviving quite well right now, you are not thriving in all the ways you’d like to be thriving. You’re starting to feel a little trapped and lost and frustrated. That’s only natural when the heart has lost its position as your guide.

I want you to know that it’s okay that this happened. It’s okay that you needed to take care of some necessary evils like paying off loans so that you can be free to pursue your larger mission in life. Sometimes we need to take a step back in order to leap forward. Just make sure you know why you’re taking that step back, how it’s going to help you leap forward, and how long it will be before you leap.

You have big dreams – so big that you might wonder if they’re just too big for you to accomplish. You might be losing a little faith and more than a little confidence. I want you to put your fears aside. I want you to remember how fearless you were climbing trees, racing around on your bike, running so fast that you felt like you might run right out of your own body. And remember how good that fearlessness felt. I want you to remember how good it felt to be free. Completely, hopefully free.

I want you to think of your mom and your grammy, woman who always, always knew you could do anything and told you so. I want you to remember that a lot of people put a lot of faith in you and your potential. You owe it to yourself to reach out for those dreams of yours, and you also owe it to everyone else. It is your obligation, not your option, to use your gifts and talents to leave the world a better place than you found it. Don’t think about your dreams as things you may be able to do; remind yourself that these are things you’re meant to do, that you must do. Because doing anything else except fulfilling your dreams is just wasteful. And you hate to be wasteful.

Your feelings will undoubtedly be hurt from time to time. You will face rejection and sadness and lose your way. When that happens, do what you always did when you were little. Take a look at those stars. Stare at them until you realize how many miracles you’re witnessing, until you recognize that accomplishing your dreams is a small feat when compared to the tremendous work that someone somewhere put into architecting that gorgeous Milky Way. Surely, if someone could line up all those beautiful stars to create something so intricate and perfect, then you can accomplish a handful of dreams, no matter how big they are, right? Right.

Keep your chin up, and give the reins of your life back to you heart.

Love,
Bella

business, career, corporation, job, youth

Is this the end of hierarchy?

Christa Avampato

With the current economy, the only case for hierarchy might be in the military. Have you ever wondered what a Senior Vice President General Manager Grand Pooba Chief of Everyone does? Me too. Who is making up titles this long and complicated? Companies too large to get out of their own way. 


The more I talk to my friends about their jobs, the more I hear the exact same frustrations continuously. “Not able to get anyone “of power” to listen to my ideas.” “Tired of feeling like I don’t count because I’m not a high enough rank.” “Why do 18 people need to approve every small decision we make?” “Why is everything SO SLOW here?”


There are many reasons for this commonality in their frustrations. It could be because many of my friends are on that cusp of being young though with enough years of experience under their belt to make bigger decisions than their titles “allow”. It could be that my friends are much smarter and more worldly than their bosses. It could that they’re all having a bad day – at the same time. 

The real reason I think they’re getting irritated is because the rules of the corporate game have changed and no one told their bosses, or their company CEOs for that matter. Seth Godin talks about industries as ecosystems, meaning they are dynamic. The rules change all the time, meaning corporate cultures need to change all the time. Adjustment, constant adjustment, is the name of the game. What worked for companies 10, 15, 20 years ago won’t work today. This is a brand new world. And it requires an intense curiosity and desire for growth that will keep today’s established companies relevant; without curiosity and growth they will be obsolete in the blink of an eye.

So what can big corporations do? Are they doomed? No – they just need to flatten out, especially at the top. A friend of mine recently attended a corporate training session and the trainer said that whenever they encounter a senior leader they need to look at their feet and let that leader run the whole conversation. I almost got sick. Who wants to work for an organization that not only doesn’t value youth, but does its best to make its young people feel insignificant? If corporations want to hang on to young people, they better learn to how to utilize their energy and ideas, quickly. Flatten out and give everyone at every level a chance to participate!

And for my friends who are frustrated with corporate rigidity? A few suggestions: think about branching out to try a new venture, maybe not for pay, but for peace of mind – for hope of what may pan out down the line. Offer your services to a start-up, or try something new like a language class that could have professional value in the future. It’s also powerful to gather the experience you can from where you are for however long you’re there. We all always have something to learn from whatever situation we’re in. Make sure to capture those learnings and take them with you when it’s time to give yourself a fresh start.      
dreams, education, hope, youth

A Lesson in Teaching

Christa Avampato

This morning Junior Achievement was on-site at my office building for a day of financial education. I co-taught the first session: A Day in the Life. We discussed feelings about money, sources and uses of it, and the value of savings and making a budget. Those 16 sets of eyes were some of the most discriminating I have ever been in front of. They are reacting to the teacher, to their peers, to the person at the front of the room, all while searching for self-definition. Quite a mixture of emotion, and therefore, behavior. 


We got through the lesson with little pain. Though nervous, I found it was helpful to put on the face of confidence and push through without stuttering or stopping except for questions from the group. I forgot nearly every one of the notes I had memorized. When in doubt of what to say next, I asked for participation, and the students happily responded quickly and intelligently.

I co-taught for close to an hour and then returned to my day. I will admit that today was more irritating than most of my days. It seemed that I would put out one fire and then find that another one had been building strength just behind me. And this went on for several hours. By lunch time, I was cranky. The last thing I felt like doing was having lunch with 16 high school students. But I went because I promised I would go. 

Bob, my previous boss, continually says that there is magic in commitment. I learned that lesson today in a few short minutes, and it was taught to me by a group of 16 year-olds. If you’re ever wondering how old you are, sit with a group of high school students, and will quickly become apparent. Over sandwiches and pasta salad, we talked about their studies, their schools, their hopes for their futures. During our conversation, I felt my frustration lift and dissipate. They made my day brighter by shining their own light on me, and for that I am very grateful. Lesson learned…
books, education, letter, writer, writing, youth

A Letter to My Younger Self

Christa Avampato

I just finished reading “What Now?” by Ann Pachett. It is her graduation speech to the students of Sarah Lawrence, her alma mater. She talks about crossroads and decisions and happy coincidences. It made me think about a book I read about two years ago called “What I Know Now: Letter to My Younger Self” where a variety of women write letters to themselves when they were younger.

I wrote my own letter to my younger self as part of a final project in business school for a leadership class. I realized I’ve never posted it to this blog, and I went back to read it today. Not only is it a letter to my younger self – it’s a good reminder of how I should be living every day. The letter pertains to many of the principles we learned in the class, the main premise being that if you start every day with 94 out of 100 points, the way a gymnast starts every routine, how will you get to 100? This idea is adapted from Peter Vidmar’s, part of the US Olympic gymnastics team in the 1980’s, motivational speeches that he gives all over the world.

I hope you’ll share your letter here as well.

“Dear Bella,
How are you going to get the other 6? Extend for 2. Take risks for another 2. Be creative to get to 100. Decide what about you remains rock solid and what changes you must make if you are to develop the potential you represent. What really matters?

Denial, passivity, collusion, and habits will try to obstruct your path to change. Work through these phases by trusting life, by trusting that when a door closes, a window opens. Change is about loss. It may be years before you understand why some losses are necessary in order to achieve greater wins down the road. Do not fear – help is on the way. Do not wait for trauma, hurt, or pain to make necessary changes; work toward clearly perceiving a better way.

Disappointment is not the fault of others; it is the result of your own premature cognitive commitment. Don’t be so quick to ignore or dismiss the logs and rocks. Understanding their motivations, or lack thereof, will hold the key to your growth.

Be wary of the boxes: those you put yourself in, those you put others in, those others put you in, and those you allow others to put you in. You must decide which boxes hold your truth.

What vision of the future will sustain you through the valleys of your life and then help you climb to the summits? You choose your energy level, enthusiasm, and sense of hopefulness. Trust is gained by behaving trustworthy.

Eliminate “but” from your vocabulary because everything that comes before it is a lie; replace it with the powerful word “and”.

People will tell you that you feel too much, trust too much, and believe in dreams too much. Smile at them and walk on – feeling, trusting, and believing. Because you feel, you think, and therefore you’re unabashedly, delightfully, and magically exactly who you’re meant to be.
Believing is seeing.

Love,
Christa”

finance, media, news, newspapers, technology, youth

The Big Money

Christa Avampato

With the markets in turmoil, it’s easy to think that the sky is falling. For many, jobs are being lost, retirement plans postponed, and savings and investment values plummeting like lead balloons. All this unrest is yielding one very positive result – the growing interest and understanding about the financial system by very young people in this country.

Slate.com, the witty if conceited and sometimes down-right nasty, has launched a new site to cater to the Facebook set interested in keeping up with the business news of the day, provided its packaged up in their language. The Big Money is a bit short on slick design, though the content is intriguing. They’re covering all the major topics like the collapse of Lehman Brothers and the purchase of Merrill Lynch by Bank of America, with some other interesting, timely, and generation X- and Y-targeted info like a socially responsible investing guide.

Viewed side by side with publications such as The Wall Street Journal and the Financial Times, The Big Money clearly goes after breadth over depth, though if they’re trying to attract younger generations this is the path of least resistance – give them a surface understanding and allow them to dig in deeper where they deem necessary and interesting. Don’t overwhelm them because they’ll tune you out, and give them just enough information to be conversant around the office about today’s top stories. The goal is to raise their awareness of the financial shifts happening today that are sure to have huge impacts on their lives for decades to come.

The Big Money is a publication that has clearly done its homework, knows its customer, and knows who they are, and more importantly who they aren’t. No brand can, or should, be all things to all people. The Big Money seeks to turn this latest economic downturn into a learning opportunity for very young adults that will build their lifelong interest in their financial well-being. If that’s the case, then mission accomplished.

adventure, career, creative process, creativity, job, technology, youth

Is experience everything?

Christa Avampato
I have been thinking about experience on a regular basis lately. I notice that every time someone mentions wanting to do something new be it a hobby, a job function, or even related to travel or choosing a new city, one of the first questions people ask them is, “Do you have any experience with that?” or “Have you ever been there or done that before?” 
I got asked this question all the time about a year ago as I was interviewing for jobs post-MBA. It seemed that experience counted for far more than my education or my interests. I actually went to one interview in which an interviewer asked me what the hell I was doing there because I had never worked in the industry the the company was in. When I mentioned that the company, in desperate need of a turnaround, needed fresh eyes to look at old problems to find new solutions, the interviewer looked at me as if I had begun speaking in an unknown language. 
And in a manner of speaking, I guess it was a new language – the language of youth and energy and passion, three things the interviewer did not possess. And I don’t mean youth in terms of age, but rather in terms of attitude and thinking. The interviewer refused to believe that any problem could be solved using new methods. It was very much an “I’ve been there, done that” kind of deal. And then I considered the incredible success of Silicon Valley – it is an industry that was largely built by people who had no experience in the areas they were trying to master. They couldn’t have experience because they, and the world for that matter, were venturing into unknown territory. It was a great blessing that no one had the ability to say, “Well, when I was at X company, we did it this way.” With that attitude, we may have never been able to witness the www as we know it. 
I mentioned this concern about “old thinking” to my friend, Dan, recently, and he said that this may very much be a function of just getting older and more experienced. And that got me thinking, and then it got me worried. Am I destined to become one of those people who believes she has seen it all before, someone who will eventually discard the energy and fascination with newness that so many young people have?
No. I’ve decided that I just won’t be that way. I can’t be that way, for the sake of my own success if nothing else. So I keep challenging myself to go places and do things that I’ve never done before. I do things that scare me. Things that I believe are beyond the scope of my ability. And this is critical to retaining youth – because even if I fail at these new ventures, at least it will remind me that I don’t everything about anything. It will remind that there is always, always something new to learn.