“Purpose is the place where your deep gladness meets the world’s needs.” ~ Frederick Buechner
Finding Purpose can be a daunting task. Just ask Princeton, the lead puppet in the show Avenue Q. He’s looking for purpose and his life takes a number of twists and turns, some happy and some incredibly unhappy, in his quest.
But finding purpose doesn’t need to be a torturous task. You don’t need to be a Princeton. There’s a better way, and it’s very similar to how companies create products every day: they identify what they do well, then they look at what the market needs, and they build products and services at the overlap between their strengths and the market’s needs.
You can do the same thing, and it won’t take long.
1.) First, figure out what you like to do and what you do well. These areas can be as broad or as narrow as you like. “Writing” is just as good an answer as “writing poetry for children”.
2.) Second, identify a pain point in the market. A pain point is something that causes people to waste time or causes frustration. For example, many people in New York City don’t have cars of their own and it can be difficult to transport a lot of goods from a store to home. For this reason, many stores and service providers have delivery service. This reduces frustration and saves time for consumers. As you go through your day, think about things that cause you to waste time or energy and things that cause you to be frustrated. Ask your friends, family members, and neighbors about their pain points. Observe other people’s behavior on the street, in stores, at work, etc. What pain points are they experiencing? Again, you can make these pain points as broad or as narrow as you’d like.
3.) Now for the fun part. Look at the list of what you like to do and where your strengths lie side-by-side with the pain points you’ve identified. This is where your creativity comes in. What can you build in the places where these lists overlap? That’s purpose, and a profitable purpose to boot!
“Abundance is a process of letting go; that which is empty can receive.” ~ Bryant McGill
As I prepare to spend my summer re-thinking and re-shaping my future, I’m unpacking quite a bit of my life: my work, my time online, and the hustle and bustle of my everyday life. I’m taking very little with me in the hopes that de-cluttering my life will open the way for new beginnings.
We sometimes place an unfair connotation on the concept of emptiness. I think of emptiness as a blessing, as a state of being that helps us to re-imagine and re-invent. If every ounce of time and space we have is full, then we can’t be open to the many gifts that new experiences offer.
So I’m making room. I’m letting go. I’m giving myself the gift of fully experiencing life one moment at a time and the chance to celebrate the beauty that each small moment holds.
It’s hard to believe that one year ago today I walked out the door of my corporate job to carve a career path of my own design. It’s been a year of consulting, writing, and teaching. Most of all, it’s been a year of incredible learning and adventure.
A million thank yous to so many of you who supported me and cheered me on during this process of discovery. I’m living my dream. My success is your success, too. Love, Christa
“Sometimes, history is destiny.” ~ Adrian Benepe, Senior Vice President and Director of City Park Development at Trust for Public Land
While Mr. Benepe is referring to the development of cities, his quote just as easily applies to our lives. What you do today matters, not only in this moment but in every moment that follows. As someone who spent a lot of time unsure of when I would actually try to create my dream career, I can promise you that time is of the essence. Waiting and talking about what you’re going to do someday gets you nowhere. Action starts the long, winding, sometimes-frustrating but always-interesting road. And that’s what we all need to do – we need to get started. Now.
Traversing this ground toward dreams is going to take time. You’re going to grind along in fits and starts. Some days it all comes so easily and some days you’ll feel like you’re chasing your own tail. This cycle of ups and downs and turnarounds happens to me all the time. Why is it so hard to move forward? And is it even worth trying?
It’s hard because we have to build the foundation, construct the frame, enclose it, smooth out the structure, and then, and only then, do we get to the fun stuff of aesthetics and decoration. But without that underlying organization, without all those incredibly unsexy but totally necessary pieces of infrastructure, the aesthetics don’t matter. Cover it up with spackle and paint all you want. It will crumble without a foundation.
As someone who is still very much in the foundation building phase, who is mired in unsexy structural details on a daily basis, I can tell you that I still find some small victory every single day. Some days, I’m waiting on that victory until the 11th hour. But it always shows up. I think about throwing in the towel and just then some small sign from the universe breaks through and that sign gives me the strength to keep going, to keep trying, to keep waking up and giving it my best shot.
I am certain there are lots of changes on the horizon. Changes I can’t even imagine, much less plan for. Some of them are going to knock me over. They’re going to overwhelm me and cause me to question everything. Well, almost everything. No matter what happens, I’m going to get right back up. I am certain of that. And I will be stronger for it. Destiny-building is strenuous work, but there is no greater joy that pulling it together bit by beautiful bit.
I found a way to get my summer by the sea. In January, I wrote a blog post about my wish to spend the summer in California. Less than a month later, I received a comment on that post asking me if I’d be interested in a free place to stay in Santa Monica. I thought a friend of mine must have written it and was pulling my leg. It was no joke. It’s a done deal – I’ll be spending 8 weeks in Santa Monica, California this summer. The moral of the story – if you have a wish, shout about it. Someone will hear you and help you.
“What are you going to do out there?” many people have asked. My number one priority will be to take a break and re-calibrate my life and career goals. I started my own consulting practice almost a year ago and I didn’t take any time off between leaving my corporate job and starting my business. I’m now that kind of tired that sleep can’t fix. I need to get away, clear my head, and rest. I also need to go hiking in the canyons, do a lot of yoga and meditation, walk barefoot on the beach with Phin bounding in and out of the surf, and cook ridiculously delicious fresh food thanks to Santa Monica’s gorgeous farmers market. I’ve also got some side trips planned as well – Hawaii, I’m on my way!
And then….I’ve got a lot of plans that are still in their infancy. I’m sorting through all of the options, but here’s what is on the table:
1.) Continue my work learning how to code via a number of free online options like Codecademy so that I can better appreciate the role of programmers in technology-driven businesses. Having worked on the business side of tech for a number of years, I believe that every business person has to have a deep understanding of technology if she wants to be competitive in the marketplace. Eventually, knowing how to code will be as common place as knowing word processing. I want to be well-prepared when that day arrives, and it’s not too far off.
2.) Connect with the startup and design communities in LA via the General Assembly office that is conveniently located down the street from the condo where I’ll be staying. They also offer great classes and events where I hope to meet a lot of good people.
3.) Work on writing projects that have been on the back burner for too long.
4.) Cultivate partnerships, products, and programs for Compass Yoga.
5.) Work on some new business ideas that focus on products I’ll produce rather than services like consulting.
6.) Decide if I will continue down the consulting path in the second year of my business, pivot and move to a product model, or return to working full-time or part-time in a leadership role at a small company with a solid mission to make the world a better place.
In the next 7 and a half weeks, I’ve got some decisions to make and plans to put in place. One thing’s for certain – this is going to be a summer to remember!
I love Anne Lamott. She is among my favorite writers because of her raw, honest turn of phrase and her fearlessness that allows her to cut right to the chase. In her efforts to thoroughly understand herself, she is a mirror for her readers.
In 2009, she wrote this gorgeous article in O, The Oprah Magazine, about how to be who you are meant to be. Her advice is this: stop. Figure out what to stop doing, who to stop pleasing, and where you don’t need to be. It’s akin to the advice that learning what not to do gets us closer to figuring out what to do. And then I would also add that you meditate because while you may be able to stop physically, you need to also give your brain a break from its tireless whirr of thoughts.
Enjoy this article and then tuck it away in your folder labeled “inspiring writing to read when I’m feeling down on my luck.” You are not alone in the pursuit of your own greatness; we’re all here with you, doing exactly the same thing.
“We begin to find and become ourselves when we notice how we are already found, already truly, entirely, wildly, messily, marvelously who we were born to be. The only problem is that there is also so much other stuff, typically fixations with how people perceive us, how to get more of the things that we think will make us happy, and with keeping our weight down. So the real issue is how do we gently stop being who we aren’t? How do we relieve ourselves of the false fronts of people-pleasing and affectation, the obsessive need for power and security, the backpack of old pain, and the psychic Spanx that keeps us smaller and contained?
Here’s how I became myself: mess, failure, mistakes, disappointments, and extensive reading; limbo, indecision, setbacks, addiction, public embarrassment, and endless conversations with my best women friends; the loss of people without whom I could not live, the loss of pets that left me reeling, dizzying betrayals but much greater loyalty, and overall, choosing as my motto William Blake’s line that we are here to learn to endure the beams of love.
Oh, yeah, and whenever I could, for as long as I could, I threw away the scales and the sugar.
When I was a young writer, I was talking to an old painter one day about how he came to paint his canvases. He said that he never knew what the completed picture would look like, but he could usually see one quadrant. So he’d make a stab at capturing what he saw on the canvas of his mind, and when it turned out not to be even remotely what he’d imagined, he’d paint it over with white. And each time he figured out what the painting wasn’t, he was one step closer to finding out what it was.
You have to make mistakes to find out who you aren’t. You take the action, and the insight follows: You don’t think your way into becoming yourself.
I can’t tell you what your next action will be, but mine involved a full stop. I had to stop living unconsciously, as if I had all the time in the world. The love and good and the wild and the peace and creation that are you will reveal themselves, but it is harder when they have to catch up to you in roadrunner mode. So one day I did stop. I began consciously to break the rules I learned in childhood: I wasted more time, as a radical act. I stared off into space more, into the middle distance, like a cat. This is when I have my best ideas, my deepest insights. I wasted more paper, printing out instead of reading things on the computer screen. (Then I sent off more small checks to the Sierra Club.)
Every single day I try to figure out something I no longer agree to do. You get to change your mind—your parents may have accidentally forgotten to mention this to you. I cross one thing off the list of projects I mean to get done that day. I don’t know all that many things that are positively true, but I do know two things for sure: first of all, that no woman over the age of 40 should ever help anyone move, ever again, under any circumstances. You have helped enough. You can say no. No is a complete sentence. Or you might say, “I can’t help you move because of certain promises I have made to myself, but I would be glad to bring sandwiches and soda to everyone on your crew at noon.” Obviously, it is in many people’s best interest for you not to find yourself, but it only matters that it is in yours—and your back’s—and the whole world’s, to proceed.
And, secondly, you are probably going to have to deal with whatever fugitive anger still needs to be examined—it may not look like anger; it may look like compulsive dieting or bingeing or exercising or shopping. But you must find a path and a person to help you deal with that anger. It will not be a Hallmark card. It is not the yellow brick road, with lovely trees on both sides, constant sunshine, birdsong, friends. It is going to be unbelievably hard some days—like the rawness of birth, all that blood and those fluids and shouting horrible terrible things—but then there will be that wonderful child right in the middle. And that wonderful child is you, with your exact mind and butt and thighs and goofy greatness.
Dealing with your rage and grief will give you life. That is both the good news and the bad news: The solution is at hand. Wherever the great dilemma exists is where the great growth is, too. It would be very nice for nervous types like me if things were black-and-white, and you could tell where one thing ended and the next thing began, but as Einstein taught us, everything in the future and the past is right here now. There’s always something ending and something beginning. Yet in the very center is the truth of your spiritual identity: is you. Fabulous, hilarious, darling, screwed-up you. Beloved of God and of your truest deepest self, the self that is revealed when tears wash off the makeup and grime. The self that is revealed when dealing with your anger blows through all the calcification in your soul’s pipes. The self that is reflected in the love of your very best friends’ eyes. The self that is revealed in divine feminine energy, your own, Bette Midler’s, Hillary Clinton’s, Tina Fey’s, Michelle Obama’s, Mary Oliver’s. I mean, you can see that they are divine, right? Well, you are, too. I absolutely promise. I hope you have gotten sufficiently tired of hitting the snooze button; I know that what you need or need to activate in yourself will appear; I pray that your awakening comes with ease and grace, and stamina when the going gets hard. To love yourself as you are is a miracle, and to seek yourself is to have found yourself, for now. And now is all we have, and love is who we are.”
“Your attitude determines your altitude.” ~ Slogan displayed at the Culinary Institute of America
And what’s true for future chefs is true for all of us. You will do what you believe you can do. You will go to the places you set your mind to and then work your tail off to get there. Belief in yourself alone won’t get you everything you want but it sure is the very best place to start.
“We spend too much time living in the ‘what if’ and need to learn to live in the ‘what is.’ “ ~ Reverend Leroy Allison
There is a casualty to being a dreamer. Sometimes we spend so much time building a world of our own design that we miss the beauty that is right in front of us. We miss the chance to be inspired right now because we’re so in love with our vision of how things will be.
I have no intention of giving up any of my dreams. I am passionate about carving my own path. However, I also want to make sure that I appreciate exactly where I am on each step of this journey. There is beauty in process, in the act of becoming. In these small, ordinary moments, there are extraordinary things happening. I want to recognize them for all the magnificence that they hold.
“We do not need magic to transform our world. We carry all of the power we need inside ourselves already.” ~ J.K. Rowling
When it comes to the matter of pursuing dreams, we don’t need to hope for miracles or luck. Our own effort is a source of magic in and of itself. We have the power to make our dreams with our heart and our own two hands. Every moment, we make choices that affect the world around us. It’s up to us to decide what that effect will be.
So if you find yourself walking through your day and taking note of things that need fixing, recognize that you can fix them. With enough care, concern, and time, we can repair and renew almost anything. Nothing is ever set in stone; everything can be transformed. We have the ability to choose how and when that transformation happens.
“Purpose is the place where your deep gladness meets the world’s needs.” ~ Frederick Buechner
Christa Avampato 