The last photo I took of Phinny before I rushed him to the ER 4 hours later.
Dear Phinny, Today marks one year since I held you. One year since I felt the weight of your perfect body in my arms. One year since I kissed your forehead between your sweet honey eyes. And yet, you have never left me. Not really. Your spirit has been with me every day. Your ashes sit on your ofrenda, next to your portrait and photograph, toys, food bowl, sweater, harness, collar, and leash. The last bed you slept in and the last blanket you rested your head on are exactly where they were the last time I saw you peacefully resting in them.
I still talk to you every day. I ask you for help and guidance. I tell you I love you before I go to sleep and when I wake up. You have visited me in my dreams and showed me around your home across the rainbow bridge. The forest, the beach, the mountains. We’ve gone hiking together there. You are happy and healthy and youthful. You are living now, forever, as you did during your best days with me.
And still, what I wouldn’t give for one more day, one more hour. Something I will never get and always want. I know I did the best I could for you, and it never feels like it was enough. I know you don’t feel that way, that you have always continued to love me, even at my most imperfect moments. I’m still trying to forgive myself for making that terrible that decision a year ago.
Though I didn’t think it would be possible, I love you and miss you more today than I did a year ago when we said goodbye. The grief of losing you is even heavier now; you have helped me get stronger so that I am better able to carry it. The joy I have for all the years we spent together is also greater; you have helped me become even more grateful for our bond. You are and always will be my soul dog. I was meant for you, and you were meant for me.
In your honor, I’m fostering dogs who need help and love to heal. I know you’re working your magic behind-the-scenes, and we’re doing this together. I know you will always be looking out for me, just as you always did when you were here in your physical form. And as crazy as it sounds, I know when you’re ready you will find a way to infuse a ray of your bright, shiny spirit into another dog who will find their way to me. I will take one look at that dog and know. I trust the process. I trust you. That will never change. Our love story continues now, and always.
The short of it:
Writer. Health, education, and art advocate. Theater and film producer. Visual artist. Product geek. Proud alumnae of the University of Pennsylvania (BA) and the Darden School of Business at the University of Virginia (MBA). Inspired by ancient wisdom & modern tech. Proliferator of goodness. Opener of doors. Friend to animals. Fan of creative work in all its wondrous forms. I use my business skills to create passion projects that build a better world. I’ve been called the happiest New Yorker, and I try hard to live up to that title every day.
The long of it:
My career has stretched across Capitol Hill, Broadway theatre, education, nonprofit fundraising, health and wellness, and Fortune 500 companies in retail, media, entertainment, technology, and financial services. I’ve been a product developer and product manager, theater manager, strategic consultant, marketer, voice over artist, , teacher, and fundraiser. I use my business and storytelling to support and sustain passion projects that build a better world. In every experience, I’ve used my sense of and respect for elegant design to develop meaningful products, services, programs, and events.
While building a business career, I also built a strong portfolio as a journalist, novelist, freelance writer, interviewer, presenter, and public speaker. My writing has appeared in The Washington Post, The Huffington Post, PBS.org, Boston.com, Royal Media Partners publications, and The Motley Fool on a wide range of topics including business, technology, science, health, education, culture, and lifestyle. I have also been an invited speaker at SXSW, Teach for America, Avon headquarters, Games for Change, NYU, Columbia University, Hunter College, and the Alzheimer’s Foundation of America. The first book in my young adult book series, Emerson Page and Where the Light Enters, was acquired by a publisher and launched in November 2017. I’m currently working on the second book in the series.
A recovering multi-tasker, I’m equally at home in front of my Mac, on my yoga mat, walking my rescue dog, Phineas, traveling with a purpose, or practicing the high-art of people watching. I also cut up small bits of paper and put them back together as a collage artist.
My company:
I’m bringing together all of my business and creative career paths as the Founder of Double or Nothing Media:
• I craft products, programs, and projects that make a difference;
• I build the business plans that make what I craft financially sustainable;
• I tell the stories that matter about the people, places, and products that inspire me.
Follow my adventures on Twitter at https://twitter.com/christanyc and Instagram at https://instagram.com/christarosenyc.
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Christa Avampato 