Month: April 2012

commitment, courage

Leap: Committment Changes Everything

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest member http://pinterest.com/charlizegrl/

Now that I’m on the other side of my decision to leap, I’m recognizing what my former boss and mentor, Bob G., coined as the “commitment effect.” He is a big Goethe fan and if there’s one lesson that he taught me in the time I worked for him it’s this: “the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too.” In other words, commit and the way forward opens up. And once you’re committed to change, it becomes impossible to stay on the same track.

Commitment breeds magic. It can’t be intellectualized. It isn’t logical. It’s not even explainable. It just happens. We are the catalyst of our own process of change. Until we commit, we can’t expect the Universe to do a damn thing for us. We have to be the driver; the Universe has to know we mean business and that we’re serious about change before it will put its energy into us.

This isn’t easy. I know it takes a great deal of faith and guts to believe this and live it. The lead up is terrifying. When we back up and stare into that moment just before we take our running start toward the cliff, our heart is beating, our blood is pumping, and doubt still has the chance to creep in. We can still turn back, and many times we do. We step out of the starting blocks and take a long hard look at the insane journey we’re about to take.

Our anticipation of the leap is much scarier than the leap itself. Our minds have this wonderful ability to invent horrific scenarios. Turn the mind off and crank up the wisdom that’s planted deep inside. That’s where the truth lies.

You know what you need to do; take your mark, get set, and go.  Your commitment will carry you.

adventure, career, courage

Leap: Don’t Hesitate

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest member http://pinterest.com/peterclemens/

“To the timid and hesitating everything is impossible because it seems so.” ~ Sir Walter Scott, Writer

Why do we hesitate? Why do we look away at the very moment when our focus is most needed to find what we’ve been looking for? For me, that moment of hesitation arises from fear, fear that what I’m about to do is the wrong thing or fear that I’m not up to the challenge. I imagine everything going wrong 6 ways to Sunday, and my imagination is vivid. So I step back, hoping to get the courage to try again.

And here’s what I’ve learned in a very real way over these last few months as I’ve prepared to take a very large leap of faith to reconcile my career and the greatest dreams of my life: hesitation only delays the inevitable. Anaïs Nin said so beautifully, “And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”

That day is coming, for you, for me, for everyone who does something worthwhile with their days. Eventually, we won’t be able to stop ourselves from living the life we imagine. And it will never be less risky. We will never be less afraid. Jumping in and of itself is a scary proposition. Always.

Do yourself a favor. Do the world a favor. Make today the day when you blossom, or set a deadline and say something like, “On June 15th, I will start to live my life on my terms.” Circle it in red on your calendar and mark it with an “L” for Leap Day.

Scared? Me, too. And it’s okay. It should be scary because it’s worth doing. Let’s leap together and trust that we will find a net or grow wings.

creativity, Easter, family, food

Leap: Easter Memories Around My Grandmother’s Dinner Table

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest member http://pinterest.com/katmckinnon/

When I was little, Easter was my favorite holiday. When I think of the happiest days of my childhood, they all revolve around that Easter dinner table at my grandmother’s house. I wish I had told my grandmother how much those days meant to me then and now I wish I had the chance to tell her that they mean even more to me now.

Easter was a special time in that home. The Sharon Rose bush outside would be in full bloom in the front yard. As we pulled into the driveway, my grandmother would be at the door waiting for us to arrive. We were the very best part of her life and she made sure we knew it every second that she was around us.

The kitchen was the first room we entered in her home and there was always a glorious, welcoming scent coming from the oven. On Easter, it was lamb – a dish I never had anywhere else and not at any time of year.It would be accompanied by potatoes, glazed carrots, and buttered peas. Everyone got their own individual salad in their own individual bowl which I always got such a kick out of. And then there would be the black olive game. My grandfather and I would put the black olives in our finger tips – the olives too big for my fingers and too small for his – and then we would wave at each other.

Once the dishes had been cleared and washed, my favorite part of the meal would start. My grandmother would make her way over to the fridge and use the step stool to grab a large, round Tupperware container. Inside would be her special cake that I always thought she made just for me. It was incredibly simple – a yellow cake made from a Duncan Hines mix topped with sliced cinnamon apples. It’s still my very favorite food in the world and I’ve never been able to re-create exactly as she made it. There was something special about that cake; I think it was all the love she put into it.

The coffee would start brewing, the walnuts and the nut cracker would come out, and then the stories would start spilling from everyone. Most of them were about people whom I’d never met, relatives who had passed on long before I was born, but through all of those stories I came to know them and love them as much as I loved all of the people around that table. I’d grab another slice of cake and hope that somehow that dinner could go on forever.

But of course, it couldn’t. It was only a snapshot in time; a day that would come and go like every other day. Long after the sun went down, we’d pile back into the car with leftovers in tow, and make the long drive back to our house. My grandmother would be at the door, waving good-bye and staring out into the darkness long after our car was out of view.

Though today I’m spending Easter in a much different way than I did all those years ago, my mind is traveling back in time to that table surrounded by those people. I’m so grateful that for a little while we all had the chance to be together.

creativity

Leap: Time to Reflect – Spring, Easter, Passover

Christa Avampato
"I love spring anywhere, but if I could choose I would always greet it in a garden." —Ruth Stout. From Pinterest member http://pinterest.com/tds_beth/

Often when we’re racing toward a goal, we have our vision focused straight-ahead. Holidays give us time to pause and look back. Even if we don’t celebrate them, much of the world around us goes still, looks inward, and finds rejuvenation in the process. And we can join them in that effort.

Though I’m at the studio for most of this weekend for yoga teacher training, I’ll be taking some time to remember Easters past and all of the wonderful people who made them possible, grateful for the ones who are still here among us and for the ones who have left us for the next plane. This is such a special time of year when the world around us wiggles itself back to life. We should follow suit.

Wishing you a very happy weekend whatever you’re celebrating whether it’s Easter, Passover, Spring, or just the gift of another day.

creativity

Winner of a Copy of Lessons from the Monk I Married

Christa Avampato

Thanks to everyone who entered my second contest that I’ve run on this blog. I put all the names into a spreadsheet and had a web-based random number generator select a winner. Congratulations to MJ, a long time reader, supporter, and generous soul who continuously sends through interesting links to add to my ever-growing reading list.

grateful, gratitude, thankful

Leap: Thank You Notes Volume 4 – Thanks, Universe, for Preserving My Ignorance

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest member http://pinterest.com/katja2/

Here’s my one big thank you for the week: thank goodness we don’t know how difficult some things are until we’ve already committed to seeing them through.

And I’m glad about that. I felt the same way about college and graduate school, about managing Broadway shows, about changing careers. If I had an inkling about how difficult any of these would be, if I had the correct sense of how steep the upward climb would be, I might have shied away from the opportunity. Instead, once committed, I was all in.

I feel this way about my advanced yoga teacher training at ISHTA Yoga, too. I didn’t know how many requirements were needed to complete the program in a few short months and just how and when and with whom those requirements could be completed. I worked out a schedule to complete all of the work, and for a brief second I held my breath. How would I get all of this done by the end of July?! A quiet voice that surprised me as much as delighted me calmly said, “Get to work.”

And then I began to laugh at myself. “Woe is me! I have to go to all of these wonderful yoga classes with these tremendously gifted teachers and learn from them? Wow, my life is really tough!” This training is a blessing. 2 weeks in and already my practice and teaching is changing in leaps and bounds. I feel my confidence and grace glowing and growing. The world looks so different through ISHTA-colored glasses. The opportunity is everywhere. All I need to do is show up with the intention to receive.

learning, meditation, yoga

Leap: Learn Your Scales – How the Lessons of Music Class Relate to Yoga

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest member http://pinterest.com/cierafaye/

“Variation is great, but make sure you’re grounded in the basics first.” ~ Wendy Newton, ISHTA Yoga Senior Teacher

On Sunday, I went to a session on meditation techniques at ISHTA Yoga as part of my advanced yoga teacher training. Wendy, one of our teachers, fielded questions from us about the basic meditation techniques we’re learning. One of my classmates asked about using and teaching modifications to meditation techniques as we’re learning them.

Wendy encouraged us to get grounded in the basics. She used the analogy of learning to play music. All musicians want to play complex, complicated pieces right off the bat but in order to find the richness in those compositions, they need to start with the scales. There’s no way around that. We build a house on top of a foundation rather than trying to squeeze the foundation underneath a constructed house. We learn to create grands meals by first learning to make toast, boil an egg, and chop vegetables.

Learning meditation is no different. We would do ourselves a favor to know the basics, get grounded, and grow from there in everything that we do. Of course it’s entirely possible to move through this beginning phase very quickly, but everyone moves through it in some fashion. Have patience and diligence in equal amounts and everything becomes possible.

change, choices

Leap: The Blessing of Suffering

Christa Avampato
From Pinterest member http://pinterest.com/alochridge/

Why can’t all of life be easy?

We go to yoga classes to find ease. We seek out ways to laugh more, do meaningful work, to blow off steam. We wish every day could be easier for everyone. But anyone who’s been around on this planet long enough has experienced pain in one form or another. Supreme loss, struggle, sadness. Or at the very least we know someone who has and we ask, “Why do terrible things happen to good people?” We question everything in the face of difficulty – our faith, our relationships, our own abilities to generate happiness and abundance.

In my apartment building fire, in my own upbringing, there was a lot of hardship and pain. For many years, I spent a lot of energy being angry and then a lot more energy suppressing that anger in an effort to appear “normal”. The truth is that I needed that suffering, that trauma, to make the most of my time here. The darkness was necessary because it forced me to step into the light.

Last week, The New York Times ran an article entitled “Post-Traumatic Stress’s Surprisingly Positive Flip Side“. Synchronously, Al’s talk at ISHTA last week addressed this idea, too. He commented that we don’t need to let suffering, ours or that of others, discourage us. Suffering leads to transformation. If we were happy with every circumstance, we would have no need to grow. We could just hang out in our current state forever. But what kind of existence is that? This life, on this plane, is about transforming the soul and nothing causes transformation and change as much as discomfort.

In this way, we become grateful for all the crappy things that happen to us and to those we know and love. These circumstances are the Universe’s way of propelling us into becoming the people we are meant to be. That’s a lot to digest and accept. And let’s be clear – it’s really a bummer that we have to suffer to be free, to evolve, to change. I wish there was another way. But the good news is that change is always possible and it’s within our power to bring it into being with our own two hands.

books

Enter to Win a Free Copy of the Book Lessons from the Monk I Married by Katherine Jenkins

Christa Avampato

The New York Times subscription giveaway was so successful that I decided to do another contest for readers!

As a follow-up to my review today, I’m giving away a copy of the book Lessons from the Monk I Married by Katherine Jenkins. A story about love across continents and cultures that explores the power and potential of every moment to change our lives in profound ways, Katherine presents us with the moment that altered her life’s course and everything that followed as she carved a new path.

To enter the contest, just leave a comment below, post a message on my Facebook page, or send me a tweet. The contest will be open until Friday night and I’ll announce the winner on Saturday morning.

books, love

Leap: Lessons from the Monk I Married by Katherine Jenkins

Christa Avampato

When I think of someone with a courageous heart, a clear mind, and a deep sense of wisdom, I think of Katherine Jenkins, the author of the book and blog Lessons from the Monk I Married. I met Kathy through our mutual friend, Sharni, another beautiful writer. Immediately, I found her to be warm, caring, and wholly confident in her essence. We started reading one another’s writing and cheering for each other along the way. I’m so proud and pleased to know her and now you have the chance to know her, too. Her book arrives into the world today.

In this year when I am exploring my own leap into a new phase of my life and career, I’m spending a lot of time drawing inspiration from people like Kathy who took a leap and never looked down. She took a leap for love, which might just be the most frightening kind of leap of all. I am fascinated by her story of meeting her husband, then a monk in a Korean monastery, by chance and the many years of back and forth emotions that they both felt. They would spend short periods of time together and then long stretches of time apart. And despite the hardship, they always found their way back to each other.

None of it was easy and their path was not apparent nor inevitable. It was rocky, long, and exceedingly difficult. Eventually, Kathy left. She closed the door and meant it. She went inside to find the true seed that lived inside her own heart, the seed that exists without any outside influence. And in the midst of that clear-eyed discovery, her love took a leap, too – right into their new life together.

And the road doesn’t end there. This doesn’t mean that it was smooth sailing from that moment on out. The road was still rocky, long, and exceedingly difficult. They both had to maintain their individual commitment to find a way forward together. They struggled with finding employment, building a business, getting to know one another as a true couple, forging friendships together, and eventually making the move from Korea back to the Pacific Northwest of the U.S.

Their perseverance and ability to remain open and honest, with themselves and with each other, is staggeringly beautiful and inspiring. If you need to believe in love, dreams, and the quest for a life infused with meaning, Kathy wrote a book for you. Author Anne Lamott wrote the wise words, “Toni Morrison said, ‘The function of freedom is to free someone else,’ and if you are no longer wracked or in bondage to a person or a way of life, tell your story. Risk freeing someone else.” And that’s just what Kathy did.

Lessons from the Monk I Married is now available on Amazon and at retailers everywhere.