“What we see is mainly what we look for.” -Unknown via Tiny Buddha
I recently had a conversation with someone who said nothing ever goes her way. She’s been way down in the dumps for years. I have my occasional bad day, perhaps even a bad week. By all means, feel your feelings. Just make sure that the negative ones that don’t help make your situation any better have a hard expiration date.
How to “snap out of it” (without a smack in the face a la Moonstruck)
If my bad mood persists beyond a few days, I force myself to get out my computer and start clacking away on a list of great blessings I have to be grateful for. And if that doesn’t work then I turn to the news and start taking note of all the people in the world who have a much harder life than I do. It’s not long before I’m kicking myself for wasting any precious moment feeling sorry for myself. I lead a charmed life – I work for it, and still I know so many of my blessings found their way to my door by chance. As Joan Ganz Cooney famously said, “I am always prepared to be lucky.” It’s the best way to live.
We all get what we settle for
My friend, Trevin, and I continuously joke that we are the kind of people who hope for the best and expect the worst. To a large extent, I think that is still true. I like to feel prepared for whatever this crazy world throws my way. One of my business school professors once commented to me that the secret to his happy life was low expectations, which led him to constantly be surprised and delighted. I have a hard time arguing that idea from a logical point-of-view. However, the yogi and teacher in me asks that I aim higher. Disappointment while upsetting at first does lead to transformation and growth, two things I aspire to do all the time.
Exactly what you want is already at hand
A truth I’ve come to know is that the more ardently you keep your eyes and ears peeled for what (and who!) you want in your life, the more likely you are to recognize it when it crosses your path. It’s true of love, friendship, career, luck, and hope. It’s quite possible that you can will the life you want into being the life you have. It’s more likely that the life you want is already accessible to you in some way if you pick your head up, take look around, and grab the opportunities right under your nose.
Seek, and you will truly see all that is attainable.
Published by Christa Avampato
The short of it:
Writer. Health, education, and art advocate. Theater and film producer. Visual artist. Product geek. Proud alumnae of the University of Pennsylvania (BA) and the Darden School of Business at the University of Virginia (MBA). Inspired by ancient wisdom & modern tech. Proliferator of goodness. Opener of doors. Friend to animals. Fan of creative work in all its wondrous forms. I use my business skills to create passion projects that build a better world. I’ve been called the happiest New Yorker, and I try hard to live up to that title every day.
The long of it:
My career has stretched across Capitol Hill, Broadway theatre, education, nonprofit fundraising, health and wellness, and Fortune 500 companies in retail, media, entertainment, technology, and financial services. I’ve been a product developer and product manager, theater manager, strategic consultant, marketer, voice over artist, , teacher, and fundraiser. I use my business and storytelling to support and sustain passion projects that build a better world. In every experience, I’ve used my sense of and respect for elegant design to develop meaningful products, services, programs, and events.
While building a business career, I also built a strong portfolio as a journalist, novelist, freelance writer, interviewer, presenter, and public speaker. My writing has appeared in The Washington Post, The Huffington Post, PBS.org, Boston.com, Royal Media Partners publications, and The Motley Fool on a wide range of topics including business, technology, science, health, education, culture, and lifestyle. I have also been an invited speaker at SXSW, Teach for America, Avon headquarters, Games for Change, NYU, Columbia University, Hunter College, and the Alzheimer’s Foundation of America. The first book in my young adult book series, Emerson Page and Where the Light Enters, was acquired by a publisher and launched in November 2017. I’m currently working on the second book in the series.
A recovering multi-tasker, I’m equally at home in front of my Mac, on my yoga mat, walking my rescue dog, Phineas, traveling with a purpose, or practicing the high-art of people watching. I also cut up small bits of paper and put them back together as a collage artist.
My company:
I’m bringing together all of my business and creative career paths as the Founder of Double or Nothing Media:
• I craft products, programs, and projects that make a difference;
• I build the business plans that make what I craft financially sustainable;
• I tell the stories that matter about the people, places, and products that inspire me.
Follow my adventures on Twitter at https://twitter.com/christanyc and Instagram at https://instagram.com/christarosenyc.
View all posts by Christa Avampato
“What we see is mainly what we look for.” -Unknown via Tiny Buddha
Christa Avampato 
Thanks for a fab post, Christa. Once again, it is food for thought.
Blaise Pascal, the French Scientist, once said that all of mankind’s problems stem from an inability to sit still, all by oneself, in a room. That is, if memory serves–to paraphrase.
Think about how true this is for all of us.
Between stimulus and response lies our ability to choose. In that choice lies our freedom.
Like you, if I am having a lousy day–or I am in a foul mood–I know in the back of my mind that I can always choose to pursue my hobbies and interests.
I don’t really need my friends, relatives, colleagues to make me happy because, finally, I make me happy or sad. The solution is within and it is upto me to deal with my own self.
We are constantly bombarded every day with life’s challenges. If life throws a curve ball, we can choose to get angry, lose our temper, complain about it, or hit that ball out of the park for a home run. I would rather choose the latter option.
Needless to say, it is true that sometimes this bad moord can persist for days. During such a time, I try to meditate and occupy my time by doing household chores and running errands. Any kind of activity helps me to win over bad moods.
Cheers. And thanks for writing such a wonderful post.
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Hi Archan,
I love your idea of turning life’s curve balls into home runs. What a brilliant way to think of it. Too often we think of curve balls as things that are going to knock us down but there is always the option of taking our best swing at them and seeing what happens. Thanks as always for this food for thought!
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I agree that while it’s tempting to expect little from life it seems a little too easy. Yes, there will be disappointments and setbacks. But throwing in the towel and saying there’s nothing more becomes a bit of a self fulfilling prophecy. If you believe life is always going to let you down it has a funny way of manifesting just that. It’s tricky – to hope and believe in more and not always see the “results” but what other way is there to live?
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