Month: July 2009

blog, friendship, writing

My Year of Hopefulness – Finding your voice and your pack

Christa Avampato

“He who cannot howl will not find his pack.” ~ Charles Simic

Your own clear, strong voice can be elusive. Writing helps me find mine every day, and that provides a benefit for every other area of my life. I’ve connected with people I’d never have met otherwise. I’ve developed friendships, mentorships, and a vast network as a result of my writing. It’s been a true blessing in my life. Through writing, I found my voice and that helped me find like-minded people.

Someone recently commented to me that bloggers are arrogant and self-indulgent people who just want to talk about themselves. I’m not sure when we turned the corner from wanting to share our experiences to being arrogant and self-indulgent. If we follow that train of thought that means every person who ever wrote a memoir, opinion column, or created any piece of art in any medium that somehow conveys their life experiences is arrogant and self-indulgent. And consider how many stories didn’t get told, and therefore didn’t get shared, and therefore didn’t help anyone because other people like the one I spoke with about bloggers discouraged others from finding their voice. It’s sad.

I’d argue that anyone who thinks their life isn’t worth blogging isn’t living an interesting enough life. Whether they choose to do that or not is of course their business, though the reason for not doing it should never be that they aren’t interesting enough. People are a lot more interesting than they give themselves credit for.

A friend of mine has been pretty badly bullied at work by a senior leader. During a recent focus group about this leader, he found that many other people felt the same way. Until this focus group, he felt alone in his predicament, wanting very much to keep his job and also wanting to stand up for himself. He got that chance through his focus group, though only found his voice because others around him found theirs too.

In a way, the person I spoke to about bloggers is a bully, too. A bully is anyone who dissuades someone else from taking up an activity that helps them realize who they are and helps them find others like them. Or they’re at the very least incredibly unhappy, miserable people. I watch the Today Show while I’m getting ready in the morning, and this morning there was a segment on bullies. It’s becoming all too common these days for adults to encounter bullies. They inflict fear on others because they live in fear themselves.

Finding your voice, and your pack, is about releasing our own fear and not allowing others to make us be fearful. You owe it yourself. The joy of life is found by connecting with others, sharing with others, and helping others to find their own happiness. Don’t let someone else take that joy away from you under any circumstances. Share your story, spread your wings, and make the most of the days you’ve got.

education, learning, passion, science

My Year of Hopefulness – The Laws of (Minimizing) Distraction

Christa Avampato

Distraction is everywhere. I’ve recently learned about a company that does brain imaging using neurofeedback to help people get “in the zone”. Athletes, artists, politicians, CEOs, writers. Fascinating stuff. And before you know it I was off and running researching psychology programs to see if I should get another Masters degree.

There’s a key difference between new knowledge that informs our current work, or the work we’d really like to be doing, and developing a brand new passion. A brand new passion takes a lot of dedication, time, and very often, money. After business school, I wanted to really understand and participate in social media, and I really wanted to focus on the craft of writing. It’s taken me thousands of hours over the course of two years to get a handle on those things. Well worth the time and effort because those are passions of mine. They define me in a very significant way.

There are a million interesting things in this world to learn so it’s no wonder that there seem to be no end to distractions. Given my propensity for distraction, I’ve recently done two things that have been helpful ways to keep my focus:

1.) Take on only 1 or 2 goals, not 5 or 6, in any one area of life.
2.) Write those 1 or 2 goals down and post them up in place you will see regularly. I’ve found that the inside of the front door is a good one so that way I read it every time I come into and leave my apartment.

Limiting distraction and maintaining focus is difficult work. It requires constant vigilance. But it’s critical to happiness and meaningful accomplishment in our lives. I have a friend who is forever getting involved in more research projects, prolonging his doctoral studies. Another friend of mine has been collecting degrees of a wide variety and in the process making her feel more unhappy and lost. There’s a balance we have to strike between expanding our horizons and keeping our eye on the ball. In general, I find the golden rule is to expand my horizons only to the point that my interests are reinforcing and supporting one another. So far, so good.

art, comedy, dreams, television

My Year of Hopefulness – Drop Dead Diva

Christa Avampato

“You are who you wanna be.” ~ Jane on Drop Dead Diva, played by Brooke Elliott

Last night, the show Drop Dead Diva had its premiere on Lifetime. Most pilots are awful. Beyond awful. This one is inspired, funny, smart, and tragic. Best of all, the back story is one of striving and thriving – a great example for all of us.

My friend, Brooke Elliott, is the star of Drop Dead Diva. I met her in 2002 when I joined the touring company of Beauty and the Beast. She is the funniest person I know. Some people tell funny jokes. Some people have crazy stuff that happens to them and their recounts of those crazy events are funny. Brooke is just funny, about everything. I can be in the most horrid mood, and the way she says hello sets me into giggles. It’s a wonderful, rare quality.

Two years ago I moved back to New York after business school and reconnected with Brooke. We had been in touch over email over the years, but hadn’t seen each other regularly since I left Beauty and the Beast in 2003. By 2007, Brooke had left musical theatre and was focusing on crossing over to film and TV work.

Brooke’s story is one of the most hopeful and compelling I know. When she left musical theatre, a lot of people asked her if she was going to get a day job while she pursued TV and film. Her answer was simple, “No, I’m going to book an acting job. I’m an actor.” No frustration, no anger, no naivety. She was going to practice her craft and make a living doing it. That acting job she was going to book is now Drop Dead Diva. And as so many critics have said, “Brooke Elliott is drop dead terrific.”

Her success comes as no surprise to me. It was just a matter of time before Brooke had her own show. With talent, grace, and determination so immense, the world was going to find her sooner or later and give her the credit she so richly deserves. After all, you are who you wanna be. It’s advice we could all stand to hear a little more often.

If you missed the premiere of Drop Dead Diva, catch the replay of the full episode at http://www.mylifetime.com/on-tv/shows/drop-dead-diva/video and tune in to Lifetime on Sundays at 9pm Eastern.

business, career, economy, entrepreneurship, Examiner, job

NY Business Strategies Examiner – Is corporate America on its way out of style?

Christa Avampato

Every generation is defined by a world event. My grandparents were shaped by the Great Depression. My parents by World War II. My Uncle Tom by Viet Nam. Me by the crazy 80’s. (I recognize that my world event is not on par with World War II, but that’s the brakes!) So now I look at my niece, Lorelei, who is 18 months old. Her life will be shaped by the aftermath of the digital age and the Great Recession.

For the full article, please visit:
http://www.examiner.com/examiner/x-2901-NY-Business-Strategies-Examiner~y2009m7d12-Are-big-corporations-staged-to-fall-from-grace

comedy, education, media, New York Times, teaching, technology

My Year of Hopefulness – How-to with Howcast

Christa Avampato

Sunday morning is my favorite time of the week. I feel rested from Saturday, likely had a great time out with friends on Saturday evening, and I relax on Sunday morning doing anything that makes me happy. Usually it’s getting my coffee and reading the New York Times. Throw in a great feature story on CBS Sunday Morning, and I’m smiling from ear to ear all day. Sundays are a gift I treasure.

In this morning’s New York Times, I read about Howcast, a new company with a noble, elegant mission: “Howcast shows consumers engaging, useful how-to videos and guides wherever, whenever they need to learn how.” Its sole goal is to help people help themselves with just about anything. The range of content is immense: some are very serious, even life-saving, informative clips (how to treat someone for shock) while others are flat-out hilarious (how to fight off a vampire). The platform is easy to use and has a clean design. The videos are short and succinct. Best of all, community members can add how-to videos of their own, so if you have an expertise that you want to share with the world, now you have a clever platform to do it.

Some of my favorites from this morning’s hunt through Howcast:
How to Survive a Bear Attack – I was laughing out loud
Fantastic collection of Yoga poses – their sports and fitness collection is extensive, from how to dribble a soccer ball to how to roast the ultimate marshmallow
Websites an resources on how to learn a foreign language
How to get your home ready for a dog

The search function is robust; I found the info I needed quickly. The load times of the videos were much shorter than I expected and the resolution is high. There are also wikiguides on topics should you choose to read the information rather than watch a video. And while other sites require account creation with a username and password, Howcast can sync with a Facebook account, allowing users to participate immediately to comment, vote, and favorite videos. Whether you’re looking for useful, timely info or a source of smart entertainment, Howcast provides it anywhere you are, exactly when you need it. DIY really is the new luxury and Howcast helps you get it.

Follow them on Twitter @howcast.

home, memory, moving

My Year of Hopefulness – The doors we close

Christa Avampato

Today I started packing up my apartment. I’m moving blocks down the street to a large, renovated apartment for less than I pay now. Go figure – one of the positive side effects of the recession. Rents are dropping in New York City like never before.

Packing up for a move is a curious activity. It begs the question, “what things do I really want to keep.” I packed up a few big bags this morning and hauled them off to the Salvation Army. Even though I do my best to combat clutter of any kind, things still accumulate. For me it’s mostly papers, magazines, and materials that relate to my writing that clutters up my apartment the most.

As many times as I’ve moved, I still get a little sentimental about leaving an apartment. Though my new space is much better than the apartment I currently live in, this apartment in particular has really meant something to me. I started my post-business school life here. I went through a job search, found my voice as a writer, and began my path to entrepreneurship right from this couch I’m sitting on. I watched President Obama’s acceptance speech and his inauguration here. I mended a broken heart and fell in love with New York again inside this tiny studio. The stock market crashed and the economy was driven to the brink as I watched CNN. Friends and family came to visit. My little niece, Lorelei, took her very first Manhattan step over the threshold of this apartment. It kept me safe, sane, and calm in the midst of a very busy city.

Any home is a lot more than just four walls and a roof. It’s a place where memories are built. Where great moments, big and small, take place. Everything in our lives stems from where we lay our heads at night so it’s only natural that there would be a little emotion in saying good-bye. After all, when we move, we are passing through a door that will close behind us for good. It’s a place to which we will never return and the only choice is to move forward.

So while I’m looking forward to being totally packed up and moved into my new four walls, I want to make sure I take the time to look back, just for a moment, and count the blessings that my current four walls housed. As Stephen Sondheim said, “This is where I began, being what I can.”

books, business, economy, free

My Year of Hopefulness – Getting to Free

Christa Avampato

This week, Chris Anderson, editor-in-chief of Wired, released his book Free: The Future of a Radical Price. Odd that given its title the cost of the book is $26.99. It might have been a good marketing angle to give the digital book away for free. That aside, his point is well taken. Consider all the ways in which the concept of free services and goods have infiltrated our society. Craig’s List, online news, Twitter, Facebook, Meet-up. Nearly all information on any topic anywhere on Earth is free. Google it. Bing it. Email an expert in the area you’re interested in, and chances are you’ll get a response.

This puts all of us as we consider our careers and accomplishments into a new frame of mind. What can I give away and what can I charge for? How long do I need to give things away before I see a return? What is the cost and benefit of free?

I’m at the very earliest stages of beginning a social enterprise. I’ve yet to spend a single penny on it, outside of the cost of my time. I’ve have friends who are experts in the field that the business is in, and I’ve solicited their feedback and gotten a lot of it, no charge beyond a heartfelt please and thank you. (I mean a very heartfelt thank you – the feedback has been really incredible!)

I’ve wanted to start my own venture for a while and the part that kept tripping me up was the pricing. How could I make money on these ideas? Chris Anderson’s book showed me that we have to develop a new way of thinking about how we earn our living and the companies we build. The answer was very simple once I looked at it from the free point-of-view. I can’t make money off of my idea, initially. Much of the value proposition for the enterprise relies on the services it offers being free. The money comes later when the services are rolled out to a wider, wealthier audience, perhaps through some speaking and writing engagement, or some incremental products that are developed as a result of the initial free service offerings.

The enterprise I’m interested in is in the education field so let’s consider an example whom I greatly admire, Sesame Street. When I woke up this morning and flipped on my TV, I had forgotten that the last channel I watched last night was Public TV 13. So it was a wonderful surprise to have Elmo pop up on my TV this morning. Sesame Street set out to be a free service to urban children in lower-income families. They wanted to use TV as a way to better prepare pre-schoolers for kindergarten. Joan Ganz Cooney and other early believers did a lot of the beginning work on Sesame Street for free. Eventually, they had sponsors and grants, and now of course have a full licensing unit, DVDs and books for sale, etc.

What the example of Sesame Street, and many other businesses that start out on the basis of free, shows us is that many start-ups require patient capital. Founders often need to keep a day job. Those first customers require a pro-bono project to help a new company build a portfolio. Writers, artists, musicians, and young academics often have to give away their work for free to get some early publicity. In the new economy, free is the best way upward and onward to profit.

So if you’re starting a new business, the first question we’d ask used to be “how can this generate money?” In the new economy, the first question may become something more like “how can we get people to try this product or service and then get them to tell many other people about it?” or “what can we give away for free in order to get people to buy an added product or service later?” The most exciting part of things being free is that it opens up the creativity valve for us. It requires new, innovative ideas. It frees us up from getting bogged down in the numbers too early on. It helps us keep our eye on the horizon ahead while also letting us make up the story as we go along.
change, fear, growth, learning, money

My Year of Hopefulness – The Lessons of Fear

Christa Avampato

Fear preoccupies us, consumes us. We can’t get it out of our minds. It follows us around, a shadow that’s always just a step or two behind. It impacts our actions. It’s distracts us from our responsibilities and keeps us from our dreams.

It’s amazing what happens when we let fear dissipate. A weight lifts from our shoulders. The world is a little brighter. There’s a little more hope in our hearts. Best of all, we are able to be more ourselves without fear. We can see all the possibilities in front of us.

So how do we let go of fear? Like most other ailments, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. So here are some ideas on how to banish fear and also how to keep it at bay, along with an example of a fear I’ve worked through.

1.) Identify the fear. Give it a name.
I always thought I had a real fear of not having money. But then as my earning power increased, I found I was still afraid. It took me a while to realize that my real fear was not being able to provide for myself.

2.) With the true fear identified, consider what would happen if we had to handle the fear head-on tomorrow.
Once I realized that I was afraid of not being able to provide for myself, I thought about what I would do if I suddenly found myself living my fear. I made a list of friends and family who might be able to help me. As I worked through my list, I realized what an amazing support group I have.

And then I considered all the times in my life when I had been very close to living my fear. I thought about how I’d previously gotten myself out of tight budget situations. In college, I was always on the verge of being completely broke. I would get an extra job or pick up a few hours at my current jobs. I even participated in psychology experiments run by grad students at my university to get an extra $25 or $50. I was very good at cutting my expenses down to nearly $0 if need be. I got used to super-cheap food, and I went without every possible frill imaginable.

3.) Talk to others about the fear. Articulated fears are much less scary than those that swim around in our minds.
This one was hard for me. For the majority of my life I was really embarrassed about my financial situation. And then I met a bunch of people in college who also had a hard time making ends meet. They were more at ease about it than I was and they always had some odd job leads that were very helpful.

4.) Set-up a plan to keep the fear at bay, and remember that a fear can be a wonderful motivator to promote good habits.
Because I was worried about not being able to provide for myself, I made an action plan of how to get myself into a situation that made my fear irrelevant. I put myself onto an aggressive savings plan so that I’d have a cushion to fall back on if something went wrong. I also became an expert negotiator for my salary and for variable priced purchases like cars and rental apartments.

My fear about not being able to provide for myself also made me very empathic toward those who truly can’t provide for themselves. I knew that fear and sadness and embarrassment they felt. I’d felt it, too. And spending time with those people made me realize how extra ordinarily lucky I am, even at times when I didn’t have much at all.

I also realized that I wanted to have more control over my earnings. The roots of my entrepreneurial spirit were started in my desire to provide for myself, to take my future into my own hands. And while I wish that I hadn’t allowed fear to plague me for so long, in the end I learned to make the most of it while it was here. I lived through my fear many times over and the sky didn’t fall down. Maybe what I was afraid of was fear itself.

business, entrepreneurship, Examiner, social entrepreneurship

NY Business Strategies Examiner – Social Earth Video Launches

Christa Avampato

Social Earth, an organization dedicated to promoting social entrepreneurship, has release Social Earth Video on their website. Social Earth Video is a broad collection of videos that include footage with top social entrepreneurs.

For the full article, please visit: http://www.examiner.com/examiner/x-2901-NY-Business-Strategies-Examiner~y2009m7d9-Social-Earth-Video-launches-today

career, Examiner, time

NY Business Strategies Examiner.com: Spending time at work

Christa Avampato

Tonight I was having dinner with my friend, Monika, and we were discussing how much time we spend at work and what that time really means to us and the people we work for. For us, it’s not about punching a clock and getting a bi-weekly paycheck. We’re giving of ourselves, choosing to spend a portion of our lives with our companies. Given that our time is the most valuable asset that any of us have, it’s a precious thing to spend so much of our time at work.

For the full article, please visit: http://www.examiner.com/examiner/x-2901-NY-Business-Strategies-Examiner~y2009m7d8-The-life-in-our-time