Time doesn’t get away from us. Put a plate of your favorite food in front of you when you’re starving and then force yourself to stare at it for 10 minutes without moving a muscle. That 10 minutes will feel like an eternity when in reality it passes just as quickly as any other 10 minutes of your life.
What matters is attention and intention. What we focus on and what we do with that focus is what allows us to give our time meaning and value. Don’t throw it away and don’t let other people waste it for you. Treasure your time. It’s a gift, and it’s yours, and only you decide how to spend it. Master its use. Make it count.
I control my direction; the speed is none of my business
Part of the reason I left New York was to have the freedom to say “no”. “No” to things I don’t want to do. “No” to following paths that I know aren’t right for me. “No” to anything that doesn’t make me jump up and down saying, “Hell yes!” I can control my direction; the speed at which I travel is a matter of timing and that timing is none of my business. I’m just grateful to be able to give my dreams the chance to unfold.
“To achieve great things, two things are needed: a plan and not quite enough time.” ~ Leonard Bernstein
This philosophy of time and planning really resonates with me. I’ve always found deadlines and outsized goals to be great motivators. They give me something to aspire to with just enough doubt to make me put my best foot forward. We don’t have forever to maximize and reach the potential within us. We have to act, sooner rather than later, with attention, determination, and energy, and that idea gets my blood pumping. Certainly, the process can feel daunting and scary, though when I look back on my life the things I treasure most are the things that required me to take big chances on big dreams that had an expiration date. That’s as true right now, as I transition to writing full-time, as it’s ever been. The time is now.
“You cannot value dreams according to the odds of their coming true.” ~ Justice Sonia Sotomayor
All dreams are difficult. If they were easy, we’d be able to check an unlimited number of them off our to-do list every day. They take time and heart. Sometimes they cause a great deal of difficulty. If working toward them makes us feel alive, if we the time we spend on them feels like time well spent, and if we learn something in the process no matter what the outcome, then they are worth every ounce of effort we put into them. Dreams are tricky like that. Their real value is not in their achievement but in how they help us evolve toward our best selves.
How many times have you caught yourself saying, “I would do X if I were younger, but…” I used to say that a lot, to myself and out loud. I convinced myself that because I’m no longer in my 20s, I had to take the sensible and practical path rather than the one that pulled at my heart. That kind of thinking only leads to more wasted time. Forget your age and think about this: you still have time left, time to reinvent who you are and to do what you love. The past is gone. Focus only on the time ahead and make the most of it.
“Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under the trees on a summer’s day, listening to the murmur of water, or watching the clouds float across the blue sky, is by no means a waste of time.” ~ Sir John Lubbock, The Use of Life
I recently returned from vacation and this quote ran through my mind every day as I wondered if I was taking too much time away from my work. I got back to New York City refreshed, rejuvenated, and raring to go. Rest gave me confidence, courage, and perspective. Have you taken a break this summer? I whole-heartedly recommend it. It does a body, mind, and heart good.
Sometimes the universe tests your commitment before it decides to back you. It’ll bet on you only after you bet on yourself.
I had just finished a call with my friend, Sheldon, about my decision to carve my own career path when an email popped into my inbox. The startup that offered me a job that I declined emailed me with a new offer that is exactly the role I asked for during the interview process. After I turned down the previous offer, I made the decision to build my own dreams rather build someone else’s. This offer tested my resolve. Without batting an eye, I thanked the startup and told them about my choice to double down on my own ideas and projects. The gut always knows and for the first time, I listened to it unequivocally.
Clarity about our own abilities and the value of our time radically simplifies our decision process. I know the road ahead of me will be rocky. There will be bumps, bangs, and bruises, and I will learn from every single one of them. I’ll be stronger, braver, and more capable for taking this path. I know that my future is safest in my own two hands. Yours is, too. Believe it. Your time is finite; your potential isn’t. Bet on you.
A young man wasn’t sure what the next step in his career should be. He went to his mentor to get advice and the mentor said only this, “If you only have a year left of your life to work, what work would you choose to do?” The young man quit his job the next day, moved, and started a new career doing exactly what he wanted to do. Not what others thought he should do, not what he thought he should do. He did what he wanted, what spoke to the very deepest part of his heart. If what you’re doing right now doesn’t make the fibers of your being sing, if you aren’t at least steadily working toward that place, you’re wasting your time. And that’s not something you can afford. Make a change. Take this man’s mentor as your own. Do the work you were meant to do.
“Your attention is precious. Don’t squander it. Don’t let anyone or anything steal it from you. Own your attention — it’s all you really have.” -Jonathan Harris
Your attention is your greatest asset because it harnesses your energy and time. Here are 5 ways I safeguard mine:
1.) Keep a book of ideas
My friend, Crystal, bought me a journal for my birthday with the words “brilliant ideas” on the cover. I use it to house my ideas about anything and everything, brilliant or not. This journal reminds me to tap in.
2.) 6 impossible things
Influenced by the famous quote from Alice in Wonderland, I just started writing down 6 impossible things before breakfast to get my creative juices flowing first thing in the morning. More on this in a future blog post!
3.) Meditate
It doesn’t have to be an elaborate, complicated practice. I sit up in bed when I wake up, close my eyes, and just focus on my breath for a few minutes. I remind myself that I am strong, healthy, and capable. I silently express my gratitude that I am alive and that I get to have another day to make a difference – my singular goal every day.
4.) Let go of “stuff”
I’ve never been a big “stuff” person. I don’t have fancy clothes, jewelry, or household items. After my apartment building fire almost 5 years ago, I became even less materialistic and I live without very many personal items at all. I recently had to downsize to take a short-term sublet as I figure out my next step in life. Giving away even more things to people who really needed them made me so happy. My life is richer with fewer physical possessions.
5.) Consciously look for beauty
On Monday, I went to the park with my nieces. My 4-year-old niece, Aubree, said, “Nan (her nickname for me), look!” She was staring out at the lake. “I don’t see anything,” I said. “What are you looking at?” “Look at the sunshine,” she said. “It’s so beautiful!” She is a wise little lady. The sunshine was beautiful. And I was missing it. Everywhere you go, look for beauty. It’s there and it inspires.
Time hasn’t passed you by. Your time is right now, today. Grab hold of it and mold it exactly the way you want it to be. Life unfolds exactly the way that it’s supposed to unfold and the timing of it isn’t your responsibility. Give your best, do your best, and live your best in this and every moment. Do that, and the timing will take care of itself.
Christa Avampato 