When we think about pursuing a dream, we often worry about the obstacles, challenges, and difficulties that may lie ahead. I wonder how many dreams never got a shot because the anticipation of those obstacles stopped us from trying before we even started. This quote helps me. I hope it helps you, too: “When the root is deep there is no reason to fear the wind.” Of course there will be obstacles. Don’t let them make you discount your capabilities; those are your roots. You got this.
Category: fear
Inspired: Difficulty fuels growth
All clay needs a kiln to be made useful. Disappointment, fear, anger, sadness. That’s your kiln. Don’t think of them as forces that work against you but forces that polish you, that make you brighter, more resilient, and brilliant. Trial by fire shows us what we’re made of. It makes us empathic and compassionate and kind. Soldier on and let it do its work while you do yours.
Inspired: Leap From Fear to Grace with an Eraser
“If we would only see that all limitations are self-imposed and chosen out of fear, we would leap at once into the arms of grace.” ~ Adyashanti
Is there something holding you back from doing something you really want to do? Too often I find that my roadblocks are internal. To overcome them, I close my eyes and imagine the roadblock—fear of failure, a lack of confidence, worry—as a physical object. I erase it, one piece at a time, until the canvas of my mind is blank. Then, I open my eyes and leap into the work at-hand.
Inspired: Go Where You Think You Can’t
“The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.” ~ Joseph Campbell
Why are we afraid to take some actions and unafraid to take others? So often I’ve found when I do exactly the thing I am afraid of, when I go where I don’t think I can go, that’s when and where I find exactly what I want. Now when I find fear, I celebrate because it lets me know I’m on the right path.
Beautiful: Don’t Let the Fear of Criticism Stop You the Way It Almost Stopped Darwin
“In the long history of humankind those who learned to collaborate and improvise most effectively have prevailed.” ~ Charles Darwin.
This Christmas I got a subscription to Smithsonian Magazine, the perfect publication for nerds like me with a motley collection of interests. In the first issue I read about giant pandas, the Monument Men, and the last Christmas card sent by President and Mrs. Kennedy. One of the most interesting articles discussed Darwin. Though he published his seminal work, On the Origins of Species, in 1859 at the age of 50, he started developing his theory in the 1830s. He never planned to let it see the light of day while he was alive. It was only at the urging of his friend, Alfred Russel Wallace, that he published the work at all. Why did he hesitate for almost 30 years? He feared criticism. He feared that he was wrong despite so much evidence to the contrary.
Darwin changed the face of modern science in a radical way far beyond anything he ever imagined. Yes, his work was controversial and in some circles today it remains so. The lesson of Darwin is this: everyone who creates anything carries some amount of fear in their hearts. In Darwin’s case, it was extreme. Maybe that’s true for you, too. Don’t be Darwin. Please don’t let fear of criticism, fear of being wrong, stop you from putting your work out into the world. Do your best, release it, and let history be the judge and jury. Being wrong is painful, though not nearly as painful as never letting your ideas have a chance at a life outside of your own mind.
Beautiful: A Lesson from American Express and The Ellen Show – You Have to Rise Above Fear
When I joined American Express in the summer of 2008, my first project was to develop a photo gift card that would give customers the opportunity to put a personal photo on a gift card. On Thursday, that product was featured on The Ellen Show with the original template design I worked on. My VP at the time said I had a $200K budget and 7 weeks to launch the product from start to finish or I’d be out of a job. He also said he and my director had no time to help me. This happened the same day Lehman Brothers failed, the bottom fell out of the economy, and the company embarked on its first major round of layoffs as the stock price fell to a record low of $9 / share. Panic was everywhere, and for good reason. I put my fear aside and got to work because I needed that job. The project launched on time and under budget, and the product is still going strong today despite intense criticism from many of my then co-workers.
Some day I’ll write about everything I learned during those dark days of our economy. Here’s the biggest lesson: in every circumstance, we have to rise above fear and criticism to do our best work. We have to look way out onto the fringes and trust our creative gut to pull the trigger, even and especially during difficult times. In the short run, this is a tough path though eventually history rewards us with the knowledge that our intuition is one of our most powerful and valuable possessions. It will always guide us in the right direction if we allow it to have its say.
Beautiful: Choose Hope
“May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.” ~ Nelson Mandela.
When faced with a decision, we need to follow the path paved with what we love. It’s the other choice, the “sensible” one, that’s really dangerous because it leads us away from who we really are and what we really care about. The sensible choice doesn’t take advantage of our talents and passions. It traps us by constructing limitations on our capabilities.
So break through and break out of that construction designed by fear. Focus your attention and energy on the possibility, and not on the contingency plans. You’re brave, smart, and resourceful. If things fall apart, you’ll find a way to adjust and adapt. You’ll have the strength to cross that bridge if and when you need to. If you take a chance on a dream, the dream will take a chance on you. And that’s where the magic happens – when we finally stop worrying about invented fears and take action on the opportunities right in front of us.
Beautiful: Pushing the Limits of Our Capabilities
Yesterday I wrote an article for The Motley Fool on the economic impacts of this week’s nuclear deal with Iran. When I was offered the assignment, I hesitated for a moment. This topic is far outside my comfort zone and it would require a lot of research on my part with a very short timeline. I wasn’t sure I was cut out to write this kind of piece, though I was incredibly drawn to the topic so I went for it. When it published yesterday, it was one of my proudest moments as a writer. I conquered that little voice that said, “Don’t do that. It’s not your kind of thing.”
This little voice sneaks up on all of us. It will try to keep us confined. It takes a lot of effort to break away from it. We have to have the courage to fail, to give it a try knowing that if we fall we will have the strength to get back up. Understand that if something doesn’t work out according to plan, we have the ability to learn, adjust, and keep going. That’s the funny thing about talents. The more we stretch them, the more they grow.
Beautiful: It’s Okay to Be Scared
Fear isn’t such a terrible thing. It shows us what we’re made of. What matters. Fear points the way to newness. New heights to be scaled. New things to learn. And ways to grow. Fear is only dangerous if it stops us from living the lives we want to live. If it prevents us from fulfilling a dream. Everything I ever wanted to do, everything I ever did that I’m really grateful that I had the chance to do, started out as something I was afraid of. So when fear shows up, I don’t cower. I don’t turn tail and run. I say thank you. And then I leap.
Beautiful: Lessons on Authenticity from My First Playwriting Fellowship Application
Last night I sent off my first playwriting fellowship application. The fellowship is with one of the theater companies I admire most in the world, right here in New York City. I have been inspired by many of their productions, philosophy, and leadership. I am quite certain they get inundated with applications and that landing even an interview is a long shot. No matter. I feel drawn to them and what they do so I’m tossing my hat in the ring.
While the play itself that I wrote this summer came pouring out of me, the personal statement didn’t flow as easily at first. The 2 questions for the personal statement were very straight forward: 1.) What kind of work do I want to make? and 2.) Why do I feel that this theatre company is the right place for me? I made a lot of notes and tossed around a lot of ideas. I’d like to think I did this in order to create a meaningful, concise statement. After a couple of weeks, I realized what I was doing. I was procrastinating. I was afraid to put my artist statement in writing and have it stare back at me. It felt like such a heavy, daunting task. What kind of work do I want to make, and why, and how, and with whom? In 750 words or less.
I would stare at a blank screen, unable to start, and then close my laptop. Last week, I put the fear aside. What’s the worst that would happen? I’d write a horrible artist statement that’s whiny and arrogant and lifeless. That’s all. And then I’d throw it in the trash having gotten all the rotten stuff out.
My artist statement wasn’t anything like that. I just answered as honestly as I could. I want to make work that has a lasting impact on how people see themselves and their contributions to humanity in a place that celebrates and supports artists. I expounded on that idea in multiple ways, but that’s the gist of it. And it felt good, really good, to say it aloud, on paper, for someone to read.
Everyone stumps for authenticity but no one tells you how hard it is to discover it, admit it, and live it. It opens us up for criticism of the very deepest part of our hearts. We give it over to someone to judge and critique and analyze. Someone peers into our essence and says, “Yes, you’re one of us” or “No, you’re not one of us.” “I get you” or “I don’t get you.” And that can be frightening. It certainly is for me, but I do it anyway because I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t. I couldn’t get up everyday if I didn’t feel like I was giving the world they very best that I’ve got.
Ultimately, we have to do it. We have to be frightened and stand up anyway and say, “This is who I am, what I care about, and I want to know if we can work on this whole business of building a better world together.” It’s an invitation, and it might be accepted and it might be rejected. As artists, that is our path no matter what our medium. We have to invite people in. Some will stick around and some will stay. It’s the only way to find our pack and to help one another. This is the way forward, and it feels good to be on the path.
Christa Avampato 