I tell wonder-filled stories about hope and healing
I want you to get angry, and don’t wallow in it. Use it. Anger is energy and it’s fueled incredible changes: the Civil Rights Movement, women’s suffrage, gay marriage, and every nonprofit with a passionate mission. Some of the very best things I’ve ever done in my life started because I was angry – Compass Yoga, Sing After Storms, Chasing Down the Muse, my education. Anger builds fire and fire transforms everything around it. Let it motivate and inspire you to build a better world.
“In the choice to let go of your known way of being, the whole world is revealed to your new eyes.” ~ Danna Faulds, Go In and In: Poems from the Heart of Yoga
No one ever said that letting go was easy. In a little more than a month I’ll be in a new apartment, probably in a new neighborhood in a different borough, and all my patterns will be turned upside down after spending almost 7 years on the Upper West Side of Manhattan.
There will be plenty of good things about this change, and there will be plenty of things that make it feel uncomfortable and foreign. I’ll be a stranger in my own life for a while and there’s no getting around that. I’ll see my beloved city from a new vantage point, literally and figuratively.
I’m a bit in denial and also very excited for the newness, the adventure, and the exploration. I’ve decided that I’ll find some way to celebrate all of it – the good, the bad, and the confusing. I’ll laugh and smile and marvel at the fact that I’m still just as capable of turning my life upside down as I was 20 years ago, letting the chips fall where they may, and reveling in it all.
We all need a good shake-up now and then. Perhaps I’ve had more than my fair share, though I wouldn’t change any of them. I’ve never regretted change; the changes are what have made my life what it is and for that I am very grateful.
Spring always makes me feel like flying. I shake off my heavy coat, put aside the boots, and open up to the warmth. To fly, we have to let go – of the things that weigh us down and the fear that holds us back. Shrug it off. Let Spring transform you, inside and out. Then, get ready for take-off. The world is waiting for you.
In all of the ups and downs of my life, I’ve found this one thing to always be true: fortune smiles on me when I smile first. What I manifest internally, comes to fruition externally. When something isn’t going right for me, I don’t bother feeling badly for myself and searching for answers externally. I close my eyes and look in. The answer is always there and then I am able to make the changes I need to make to have the life I want. They aren’t always easy changes, though they are always possible.
Yesterday we had our first round of casting for my play Sing After Storms. I continue to be astonished by the immense talent in this city. I feel like so much of it is locked up, waiting for its turn to be seen and heard. I want to find a way to free it, to give it the space and opportunity to let it unfurl, experiment, and take risks in the pursuit of creating something that affects hearts, minds, and souls on a massive scale. It is such a privilege to see this raw truth up close and personal, to have a hand in crafting its path. We’ll find a way to scale this effort, to bring more people into the fold and give them a way to make significant contributions through the work they love to do. Sing After Storms is just the first step in a much longer journey.
My friend, Blair, sent this saying to me because she thought I could appreciate it: “All great changes are preceded by chaos. ~ Deepak Chopra.” I live by it. In the theater, you get used to the chaos and since all of my early career training happened in that industry, I thrive in the madness of activity. I know what goodness comes of it if we just delve in and enjoy the ride. When life feels jumbled, chaotic, and hectic, I have to remind myself to be thankful for that energy. So much beauty will be revealed when the dust settles. When we create something, craft it with our hands and hearts, there is bound to be a lot of movement, internal and external shifts. Just enjoy it. It won’t last forever, and when it’s over you’ll miss it and look for your next great creation opportunity. Take it as it comes.
Matthew McConaughey was on CBS Sunday Morning to talk about his un-branding. In a world where branding in all its many forms seem inescapable, it was refreshing to hear someone talk about chucking it all out the window and what’s come of his efforts. Known as a guy’s guy / romantic lead, McConaughey is nominated for an Academy Award for his role in Dallas Buyers Club in which he plays a homophobic rodeo cowboy who is diagnosed with HIV and given 30 days to live. He meets, befriends, and starts an illegal business with a transsexual who also has HIV. In Texas. Based on a true story. What?!
While Dallas Buyers Club is now a contender for several Oscars, for a long time it seemed destined to never see the light of day. 137 potential producers turned it down over several years before it found the funding, and the week before shooting was set to begin, they still didn’t have all the money they needed. They pushed on anyway. They just wouldn’t give up.
McConaughey was committed to the making of this film and the remaking of his own career in the process. For two years he turned down everything that fit the image that made him famous because he wanted to send a clear and persistent message that he would only take challenging roles that scared him. He wanted a complete career shake-up. While that was a personal choice, he certainly didn’t want to be largely unemployed for two years. Yet, that’s what it took. Two years of no work to prove that he was serious about taking his career in a new direction.
When I first heard this I thought, “Big deal. He’s probably got so much money that if he never works again he and his family will be just fine. Was he really taking such a big risk?”
And then I thought about what a shark tank the world of work can be, to say nothing of the world of work in Hollywood. He could have kept right on doing what worked, what he was good at, and raking in the money in the process. No one would have batted an eye at that and he would have gotten plenty of pats on the back for a job well done. Instead, he risked failing in a big way and throwing away an image and a career that have served him well that couldn’t have been recovered. They just didn’t feel good to him anymore, so he tossed them in favor of the unknown, something that made him feel alive again. Dallas Buyers Club is the result of that work. Was it worth it? All signs point to yes.
“Throw me to the wolves and I will return leading the pack.” ~ Unknown
This is how we need to look at obstacles. Confront them head on, give them a good hard look dead in the eyes, and commit to rising above them. I don’t let them take me down. I decide to let them do their work to make me stronger and more capable. They are there to teach me something. I will discover what lessons they hold and I will master them. Resolve to be this strong, this determined, this brave, and nothing will stand in your way.
“Optimist: Someone who figures that taking a step backward after taking a step forward is not a disaster. It’s the cha-cha.” ~ Robert Brault
Forward, back. Forward, back. This is exactly what happens whenever we try to build something. It’s the dance of trial-error-and-trial-again. This is true of everything I’ve ever done. Nothing has ever been a linear progression from 0 to 60. The fun is in learning to ride the wave. When the roller coaster pulls up beside you, hand over your ticket, grab a seat (I recommend the front one because you can see better!), buckle up, and learn.
I’m all for big leaps. Big, daring gestures that signal a new beginning. I’m also a fan of small steps, those tiny changes we make in our day-to-day that add up over time through dedication and hard work. Tiny steps can be frustrating. We want so much to move forward quickly and efficiently. When we’re ready for change we want it right here, right now in a big way that we can feel and others can see. However, there is so much beauty, so much learning in those tiny steps. They are no less worthy and deserve every bit as much celebration as the big ones. They pave the way, too. So don’t wait and save yourself for the opportunity to take a big step. If you can take a small one today, then do it. It’s still progress. It still has value and meaning. It helps prepare us for the big step that eventually we will be able to make.
Christa Avampato 