“You look really good for 35.” One of my co-workers said that to me this week. I adore her and I know she meant it as a compliment though it struck me as such an odd thing to say. Exactly what does 35 look like? I turned 35 in March and detailed out 35 things I’ve learned along the way in this lifetime. As I wrote the post, I was continually surprised by how un-35 I felt.
The other day I was brushing my teeth and it happened. One little lone white hair. I immediately ran to Google and found that stray white hairs can happen at any age and one really doesn’t signify anything. I looked a little closer at the mirror. No wrinkles yet. “Good,” I thought. “This oily skin of mine has some upside.” I promptly started to see a dermatologist for the first time in my life to make sure I keep this skin as long as possible. No matter what Google says, that little white hair was a wake-up call. Time is passing by, like it or not. I was surprised by my reaction. Maybe I am not as okay with aging as I thought I was.
And then I saw this Guatemalan proverb on Daily Good’s email. It made me laugh at all my determination to not get older, or at least not to look like I’m getting older. In my heart, I’m still sorting it all out, still experimenting, and still beginning. Now I’m starting to realize that perhaps this sorting is a lifelong process, for the young and the young at heart.
I’m reminded of Sandra Cisnero‘s writing that says we are always all the ages we’ve ever been. We carry that experience, that memory, that outlook with us. Whether or not we have white hair and wrinkles, there’s a part of our heart that is always young. And that is a comfort at any age.
Christa Avampato 