I recently took a spin through Chinatown with my friend, Michael. He and his lovely wife, Min, have been schooling me on Chinese culture. My friend, Allan, is grateful for the help. Being from Beijing, Allan has been showing me the ways of the Chinese for almost 5 years now. With my endless questions, Allan can use all the reinforcements he can get!
Allan, Min, and Michael have shown me so many incredible aspects of Chinese culture, a culture we so sadly know precious little about in the U.S. P.F. Chang’s and electronics do not a culture make. Chinese manufacturing is largely responsible for our lifestyle in this country, and yet we have not taken to their literature or philosophy as readily as we should. It’s a shame, really. Their wisdom has so much to offer us as we make our way down the road to enlightenment.
One aspect of Chinese culture that I adore are the proverbs. In a handful of words, they encompass so much learning. Michael hit me with one the other day that’s been on my mind ever since. “Ji tong ya jiang” – in English it literally translates to “chicken talks to duck.” Both birds, found in the same geographies, and no matter what, they can’t understand each other. How many times a day do we have this same conundrum with others? You say something to me, I say something back, sometimes in the same language, and neither of us have a clue what the other said.
So how do we get beyond chicken talks to duck? In other words, can we learn empathy and understanding? Yes, I believe we can. It’s not easy, and if we aren’t born with an innate sense of empathy, I think it always remains a challenge. Not impossible, but indeed challenging.
Here are 6 ways to get some empathy and gain a better sense of understanding of others:
1.) Volunteer – spending time on a project with others, and particularly helping others who are struggling, instills us with a remarkable sense of understanding. It forces us to walk in another’s shoes.
2.) Travel and seek out the locals. I can’t stand resorts and fancy digs on vacation. They create such an unnatural barrier between tourists and locals. They impede understanding. So whenever I’m traveling, I get out, way out, of my comfort zone.
3.) Read literature, listen to music, eat food, and see art that’s entirely foreign to you. A peoples’ culture comes alive in their art. It tells their history, their trials and tribulations. Give it a whirl and you’ll discover things about others and about yourself that you never even imagined.
4.) Learn a new language. Inexpensive language classes and conversation groups exist in almost every major U.S. city. You really want to understand another culture? Literally try to speak with their words and you’ll learn and earn their hearts.
5.) Take up the sport, exercise, or meditation of another culture. Yoga, Tai Chi, Qigong, karate, cricket. A nation’s pastime is an enjoyable way to more deeply understand their culture.
6.) Stop in at the church, synagogue, temple, ashram, or mosque of another culture. I’m not saying you have to believe in what’s being preached. Just listen. Culture the world over is deeply rooted in religions. Learn how a culture prays, where they turn to when times are tough, and understanding their daily lives becomes easier.
The image above is not my own. It can be found here.
Christa Avampato 
Love this Christa – I am going to post this or tweet or do something with it – needs to be shared!
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Thanks, Sharni! Isn’t that saying fantastic? I’m so lucky to have friends who share things like this with me.
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You write such delightful posts, Christa, bless your heart.
Yes, according to analysts, China will become the new America in due course of time. The economy in China is booming and new job opportunities are cropping up like never before. You may be surprised to know how many Americans have already migrated to China, and probably even more are exploring the country as tourists, etc.
The Chinese culture is fascinating and it is ancient. I think a lot of Chinese have also emigrated to the U.S. and more are on the anvil. As the Chinese become more influential and powerful around the world, probably more and more Americans will also start to learn about China, its customs and traditions. This augurs well for bilateral trade and international relations. You are going out of your way to spread your horizons, so I feel happy for you. I am sure you will find many Chinese eager to help you too.
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Hi, Archan. I hope more Americans explore the depths of Chinese culture. It’s so fascinating and I’m lucky to have friends who so readily share their heritage with me. Cheers!
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You have made my day: Chicken talks to Duck. Perfect perfect perfect. I work in a manufacturing plant. My job is to ‘translate’ the numbers to the executives in the really nice suits, to middle management in nice shirts and dockers and to the guy driving the forklift, aka, manicured, clean and greasy. This is what it feels likes sometimes. What a perfect phrase. Bless your heart!
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Wow, Beth! I had no idea what you did for a living. What type of manufacturing is it? I bet you have some incredible “chicken talks to duck” stories. Let’s hear ’em!! 🙂
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Hi Christa,
I found you through Writers Rising. I think my favorite form of cultural immersion (after being there in person, of course) is through art and literature. Nothing transports like a good novel or a well done film in my opinion. A novel has the benefit of lasting longer and pulling one deeper into the experience, I think. It’s been years since I read Crime and Punishment but I still have such a visceral sense of St. Petersburg as a result. There are so many other books I can think of, A Story Like the Wind, Pride and Prejudice, A Town Like Alice, that have done the same for other parts of the world.
By the way, if you have the time to share an email, I’m curious to know how you found the transition to WordPress. I’ve considered making the switch but have been reluctant. I’m still fairly new to blogging but I’m feeling as if WordPress has more to offer than blogger.
Cheers! Kristin
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How wonderful to meet another Writers Rising writer! I was so thrilled that Kathy invited me to join. Will definitely send you an email about WordPress.
Books are such an amazing way to transport us to another world. I don’t recognize some of the books you mentioned – I will definitely check them out. I’m intrigued by the title “A Town Like Alice”!
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Chicken talks to duck! Ha! I so love that saying. This phenomenon is something I point out to my animal communication students when they expect to get 100% accuracy in their readings with other species. I have a whole article for them pointing out that when in communication with our fellow humans IN THE SAME MOTHER TONGUE we can’t manage 100% accuracy. Now I have a saying to put it more succinctly 🙂 Of course I will have to explain to them what “chicken talks to duck” means LOL. I’ll send them here! Brilliant post Christa. Thanks.
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Thanks, Trish. I love this saying. I love that you are an animal communication expert – what a fantastic field. I have always felt that I had my own special language with the dogs I’ve had over the years. Somehow, we always just understood each other.
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